Catholicisim--coming back to the faith

[jillian]

I have been away for a long long long time. I don't even know where to start.

[momto10blessings]

I'd start with confession and mass

[teachermom2834]

We always have reverts in RCIA classes.  Not required but a lot of people find it helpful.  Our parish is starting a ministry called "Landings" that is for the purpose of welcoming those who have been away back to the Church.

 

It can be overwhelming.  I know people have mixed feelings about the sacrament of Reconciliation but it can be very healing.

 

Feel free to ask questions. 

[imagine.more]

Welcome back :) When I spent some time dabbling in Lutheranism and came running screaming back to the Catholic church I started by emailing a priest at a nearby church where we had just moved. He happily replied immediately and positively and he helped me get things sorted out in practical aspects. First I started attending Mass, just didn't take Communion. Then my DH and I met with my priest and we just had a good chat getting to know him and he got to know us. We let him know we wanted to get our marriage convalidated (we were married in DH's Lutheran church) and he had us fill out the paperwork and get that done. In conjunction with the convalidation I went to confession for the first time in years and then started taking communion again. It was great to be fully Catholic.

 

If you don't mind answering, where are you personally in your journey back to the faith? Do you still have some questions or issues you'd like to explore or are you 100% certain the Catholic Church is the one true Church where you need to be? Were you raised in the faith and are familiar with practicing the faith or do you need some encouragement getting going in the day-to-day living out of Catholic faith? Just because there might be some books or blogs I could recommend that might be useful depending on where you're at in your head. 

[KungFuPanda]

I think our parish calls that program "Re-membering." I don't think you'd be alone. It seems like an ongoing program.

[jillian]

I am a cradle Catholic. I was born and raised in the faith and went through every sacrament. We were married in the faith as well. I have been non-practicing for several years. The faith is difficult for me in many aspects. My aunt is a former Catholic nun and she is very stringent in how she lives. She has pulled in aspects of her religious life years into her marriage and with her kids. She is intolerant and cannot even possibly see other viewpoints about things, things that yes I understand the church takes a stand against, but at the same time I really feel that it's not my place to put a judgment call on things like sins. The fact is not everyone believes the way any religion believes, whether it's Catholic, Lutheran, or fundamental Baptist, and it's not right to impose those beliefs on others. And I think that is where my sticking point is.

 

I have been to my local (read: right around the corner) parish and it doesn't feel comfortable to me. I think the difficult aspect of all of this for me is that every single parish is slightly different. Every single one has slightly different cadence to the music, and a slightly different rhythm and it's jarring when trying to find a new parish.

[roanna]

Any of the Scott Hahn books are also great in making meaningful what may have been taken for granted.  

[Little Nyssa]

Best wishes for your journey!  Have you looked at the Crossing the Tiber social group?

[PrairieSong]

Best wishes for your journey! Have you looked at the Crossing the Tiber social group?

Yes! Join Crossing the Tiber!

[MyLittleWonders]

Here's the link: http://forums.welltrainedmind.com/forum/184-crossing-the-tiber/

[speedmom4]

I recently reverted to Catholicism and I started with Confession. I was very open and honest with the priest and explained that I had been away for quite a while and had been attending a Protestant church. I explained that I wasn't sure if or how I would return. He suggested to just start coming to Mass and see how it went. I did that sporadically for several months while I was still attending the Protestant church. Over time I realized that Catholicism is where I belonged. I started attending Bible studies that were offered at our parish. Currently I am in RCIA with my husband and boys who are converting. 

 

I highly recommend The Journey Home with Marcus Grodi. You can watch it on YouTube or EWTN if you have it. They are stories of people converting and reverting to the faith. Most of them are very inspiring. Here are some additional resources I recommend:

 

http://chnetwork.org/

http://www.catholicscomehome.org/

http://www.conversiondiary.com/  This blog is by Jennifer Fulweiler. She is awesome. She is a convert to the faith. You can search her blog for her posts during her conversion. She has a very unique perspective.

 

If I think of anything else I'll come back and post. Don't be afraid to come back. I felt overwhelmed with all that I didn't remember or didn't understand. Slowly but surely I'm learning and remembering. It's been the best decision I have ever made for myself. I have a peace now that I have never had. 

 

Don't be afraid to ask questions! 

 

God Bless!!!

 

Elise in NC

[brehon]

What doesn't feel comfortable to you about your local parish?  Is it the priest?  Did you talk with someone else who made you uncomfortable?  Or was it the ambience itself? 

 

We go to Mass at a parish which is almost 30 miles from our house (driving through at least two other parishes to get there).  So, don't feel constricted to just this one church/parish.  Although it is perhaps preferred that people attend their local parish, it isn't required.  Maybe try attending Mass at another parish.  I realize that it can be jarring when what you experience at one Mass may not be what you experience at another Mass even at the same church.  Maybe if you can focus more on the Mass itself and not the "extras".

 

As far as your aunt.  I can see how her attitude and behavior could be off-putting, to say the least.  As I'm sure you know, though, those types of attitudes are not the norm (at least where I am) and I imagine she is not representative of all of the laity even in her area. 

 

Perhaps you'd consider attending an RCIA class.  There are many people who were raised Catholic but later attended other churches who sit in on these classes and feel that doing so helps them in their faith journey. 

[jillian]

What doesn't feel comfortable to you about your local parish? Is it the priest? Did you talk with someone else who made you uncomfortable? Or was it the ambience itself?

 

We go to Mass at a parish which is almost 30 miles from our house (driving through at least two other parishes to get there). So, don't feel constricted to just this one church/parish. Although it is perhaps preferred that people attend their local parish, it isn't required. Maybe try attending Mass at another parish. I realize that it can be jarring when what you experience at one Mass may not be what you experience at another Mass even at the same church. Maybe if you can focus more on the Mass itself and not the "extras".

 

As far as your aunt. I can see how her attitude and behavior could be off-putting, to say the least. As I'm sure you know, though, those types of attitudes are not the norm (at least where I am) and I imagine she is not representative of all of the laity even in her area.

 

Perhaps you'd consider attending an RCIA class. There are many people who were raised Catholic but later attended other churches who sit in on these classes and feel that doing so helps them in their faith journey.

I loved my parish in tx where I grew up and this parish where I am in sc is just not comfortable. No person in particular but it wasn't a young parish, we are a young family. My aunt is a different breed and I know that, so she shouldn't be my view but she is so vocal she really does overshadow most of the other folks I know who are Catholic. I need to check about rcia and other parishes near me.

 

I went to catholic school for elementary and middle school and it was an awful experience and I don't remember much of anything from my religion classes

[Trish]

 

 

I have been to my local (read: right around the corner) parish and it doesn't feel comfortable to me. I think the difficult aspect of all of this for me is that every single parish is slightly different. Every single one has slightly different cadence to the music, and a slightly different rhythm and it's jarring when trying to find a new parish.

 

Isn't the fact that every parish is a bit different a nice thing for people's comfort levels? We have a regular parish which we like, but depending on our weekend/vacation activities we will attend church virtually anywhere. I like that it is different (in certain aspects) but essentially THE SAME. It is still the Mass. And most are pretty similar, but a few can be "out there" (either super conservative or super loosey goosey), which is great for people who want that. Even here in the south there are five parishes within reasonable driving distance that we can choose from.

 

[brehon]

I loved my parish in tx where I grew up and this parish where I am in sc is just not comfortable. No person in particular but it wasn't a young parish, we are a young family. My aunt is a different breed and I know that, so she shouldn't be my view but she is so vocal she really does overshadow most of the other folks I know who are Catholic. I need to check about rcia and other parishes near me.

 

I went to catholic school for elementary and middle school and it was an awful experience and I don't remember much of anything from my religion classes

Ah, yes, being in a young parish can make a difference if you have a young family.  Do check around about RCIA and other parishes.  Especially given your unfortunate experiences in your parochial school I think sitting in on RCIA classes will help you with your exploration/journey regardless of where you eventually land.

 

About your aunt - yes, I can understand how such a vocal <ahem> proponent of a particular brand of Catholicism could very easily be a touchpoint.  I'm very sorry to hear that.  Does your aunt live near you?  That could make things even more dicey.  Personally, I simply wouldn't share any of your journey with her.  That might stem her a bit. 

[jillian]

We rarely talk after comments she made regarding our infertility journey. We are holiday contacts--I or she calls on holidays and we send birthday cards.

 

Absolutely Trish. If I had to go to this parish around the corner I would be very reticent to go to mass because of how I feel. I attended a very traditional, Latin mass church in Washington and loved it. Women covered their hair/head, folks dressed up and all that but it was young and there were a lot of kids in the parish. It was wonderful lol.

[Tiramisu]

We rarely talk after comments she made regarding our infertility journey. We are holiday contacts--I or she calls on holidays and we send birthday cards.

 

Absolutely Trish. If I had to go to this parish around the corner I would be very reticent to go to mass because of how I feel. I attended a very traditional, Latin mass church in Washington and loved it. Women covered their hair/head, folks dressed up and all that but it was young

and there were a lot of kids in the parish. It was wonderful lol.

 

I can relate because I have a very hard time at the regular parish around the corner. The music is too loud and theatrical for me, even though there are good priests and wonderful people there.  

 

It's funny that you mention the Latin Mass because, reading this thread after your sensory one, the first thing that came to mind is that you might do well with a Latin Mass. And yes, every one I've been to has lots of young families. That can become a great source of support in many ways during the time that your children are growing. Mom to mom support. Activities for kids. Not being the only one chasing a toddler.

 

Don't worry about your aunt or anyone else. We are all sinful. So don't let an individual's personal weakness keep you from following God's call in your life.

 

I'm not in the Tiber group, but I'd encourage you to join and learn more about the Catholic faith. I was also baptized as an infant but didn't learn and live my faith until I was an adult. I wish I had something like that during the time I was searching.

 

There are many Latin Masses around now. There are at least four I know within a comfortable drive and more if I want to go into the city. Even among those, each one has it's own atmosphere. Look for one near you. http://www.ecclesiadei.org/masses.cfm

[Ellie]

We rarely talk after comments she made regarding our infertility journey. We are holiday contacts--I or she calls on holidays and we send birthday cards.

 

Absolutely Trish. If I had to go to this parish around the corner I would be very reticent to go to mass because of how I feel. I attended a very traditional, Latin mass church in Washington and loved it. Women covered their hair/head, folks dressed up and all that but it was young and there were a lot of kids in the parish. It was wonderful lol.

 

:grouphug: 

 

Well, honey girl, the truth is that you need to go, regardless of how you feel, or how annoying your aunt is, or anything else. Next week, you should call the church office and ask to talk to the priest. :-)

[Ellie]

I have been away for a long long long time. I don't even know where to start.

 

:party:

 

Go to confession. And then, yes, if your parish has RCIA, go there for a reboot. :-)

[Rjmakmom]

I am in a similar situation. I am a cradle Catholic, 12 years of Catholic school, married in the Church, baptized 3 kids in the faith...then got divorced. That sent me on a journey through non-denominational churches and ultimately to the Episcopal Church when I met and married my current husband, who is also a cradle Catholic and was actually considering the seminary when we met. I was against getting an annulment, so we have been at an Episcopal church for the last 11 years, but my dh has always dreamed of returning "home". Last month we started attending a Catholic Church in our area and I am surprised to find that I missed it more than I ever realized! I am currently starting the annulment process, so we can have our marriage recognized. 

 

 

[jillian]

Thanks Sparkly!!!!

[fdrinca]

Are there other masses at your local parish that are geared toward young families? We felt very alien in our new parish until someone kindly pointed out that we weren't attending the "family" mass. 

[jillian]

I"m not sure, the parish around the corner from me is a lot of older folks, mainly retirees. I suspect they also don't have a large younger population because while they have a "crying room" they don't have really any family friendly or child geared stuff.

[matrips]

When we moved, we tried out five different catholic churches in our area to find one that appealed to us. I had never thought of doing it before, we always just went to our local parish. The closest one, walking distance, was not the right fit at all. We drive about 15 minutes to a very active church, many volunteers, and many things going on. It's also the first time I truly enjoy listening to the homilies; they are meaningful, made with effort, and pertinent.

 

So don't be afraid to try out different churches. I'm glad they all have different feels to satisfy different needs and stages of life.

 

I"m not sure, the parish around the corner from me is a lot of older folks, mainly retirees. I suspect they also don't have a large younger population because while they have a "crying room" they don't have really any family friendly or child geared stuff.

[imagine.more]

I am a cradle Catholic. I was born and raised in the faith and went through every sacrament. We were married in the faith as well. I have been non-practicing for several years. The faith is difficult for me in many aspects. My aunt is a former Catholic nun and she is very stringent in how she lives. She has pulled in aspects of her religious life years into her marriage and with her kids. She is intolerant and cannot even possibly see other viewpoints about things, things that yes I understand the church takes a stand against, but at the same time I really feel that it's not my place to put a judgment call on things like sins. The fact is not everyone believes the way any religion believes, whether it's Catholic, Lutheran, or fundamental Baptist, and it's not right to impose those beliefs on others. And I think that is where my sticking point is.

 

I have been to my local (read: right around the corner) parish and it doesn't feel comfortable to me. I think the difficult aspect of all of this for me is that every single parish is slightly different. Every single one has slightly different cadence to the music, and a slightly different rhythm and it's jarring when trying to find a new parish.

 

I understand how hard it is to find a good parish. Our area is pretty stark, lots of cultural catholics and such. But I've settled at our local Cathedral and it's alright there, I just ignore the football references in the homilies, lol!

 

Anyway, I agree with others that if you have a Latin Mass and are comfortable with that style it might be a good place to start. Unfortunately our nearest one is 1 hour away but the one time we did go it was so nice to see lots of kids and young families there as opposed to our local churches that are full of contemporary music and middle aged people. 

 

As for books I think Scott Hahn is a good revitalizer of the faith. And yes watching EWTN and The Journey Home might be decent, there are some reverts on there occasionally too. Also, now is probably a good time to just dive into scripture study. Maybe start keeping a simple scripture journal/prayer journal. 

 

Good luck!