What things do you do to foster contentment and peace in yourself?

[gandpsmommy]

I am struggling with this. How do you find joy in life?

[stephanie]

I am struggling with this. How do you find joy in life?

 

I don't know what your faith or spiritual beliefs are,but for me my joy is in The Lord. I had a very difficult childhood, and looking back, I see His fingerprints all over my life. I have a testimony now that allows me to be content exactly where I'm at. I know the things God has done for me in my life, and I know what His word says about the things that He still has planned for my life. Do I ever get down? Of course I do, but that's where my faith comes in. That's where I grow,and learn that no matter what my circumstances are that He is still with me, comforting me. I know that He wants me to take advantage of the joy he offers even when things aren't so wonderful looking. I've learned to look at how far God has brought me,and to be so grateful for what I have. I'm sorry that you are feeling down right now. I struggled with depression as a young adult, but there again is where the Lord came in and rescued me. I hope this post comforts you a bit, and please know that I am going to pray for you to find peace and joy.

[GailV]

I list blessings at the end of every day. It's amazing how many things I can find to be thankful for when I put my mind to it. I don't bother to write them down, mostly because I'm lazy. I think it would be cool to do that, though.

 

I find that my contentment varies with my diet. When I make sure to get the proper EFAs I'm a calmer person; when I eat a lot of processed food I start getting mentally ... weird ... I start to get panicky and my mind starts gibbering endlessly about bad things are gonna happen and I'm not gonna be able to control it. Umm, well, you get the picture.

 

I do things for myself most days, like some sort of exercise. This helps keep my stress level down, so I'm better able to focus on positive things.

 

I avoid television newscasts.

[Liz Mc in SC]

For me, it's all in awareness. Too often we rush thru our day without taking time -- to be aware -- of the things in this life that can provide you joy. We go much too fast thru this world.

 

For example, listening to laughter down with hall from my teenage daughter and her friend. Stopping to watch/listen to the birds. Just taking a moment to see the wonder and beauty in this world before rushing off to do my next task. Fostering awareness will help you to see the thing that are all around you that can provide you with that joy.

 

Gratitude is wonderful -- it's just one more way to be aware. but sometimes I beleive we fall into a trap of saying 'I should be happy because I have a good home, $ pay the bills, the ability to homeschool...I should be happy, but for some reason I'm not" Happiness and Joy are really not in things.

 

There is a book you might find helpful called "Wherever you go There you are" by Jon Kabot-Zinn It is a book about meditation -- but more than that it is about fostering awareness. It's one of very few books on this subject that doesn't interfer with my faith in God, with the exception of a very short chapter at the end of the book.

 

Also I find that when there is joy in my life that if I don't take a moment to savor it before heading off to do something else, then I'm robbing myself of that joy.

[CactusPair]

exercise, walking, yoga, caretaking of animals, looking out my window,

 

taking naps!!! getting enough solitude, living in the moment, crosswords

 

if i could, i would do volunteer work

 

appreciating small things--to *see* the dirt on my floor is actually a really cool thing; *walking* up and down the steps to do laundry is wonderful

*driving* is an event;waking up without excruciating pain is a marvel like no other

 

think how you'd feel if you couldn't do these things in the event of illness or accident. when everyday activities are taken away a person sees them in a different way, sees them for the miracles they really are.

[elegantlion]

I am struggling with this. How do you find joy in life?

 

 

My joy is in the Lord as well. There were times I grumbled, I'm not happy, I don't care if God wants me to be happy, this just sucks.

 

I used to think life was a roller coaster, ups then downs. I have learned it is not. They all come smashed together and I have to pick out the good, the part of it that gives me joy. For instance my dh and I used to fight a lot before ds was born. I mean drawn out standing in opposite rooms in the house, two hour long discussions. We eventually got to the point we could discuss the same issue while sitting at the table and have it resolved in two minutes. When I realized that it gave me great joy.

 

This is not coming out the way I mean it, but I think joy is around in every circumstance and every day. Sometimes we have to look past everything else to find it.

 

I love the idea of a blessing journal.

[Hoggirl]

compare myself or my situation to others. This can be related to ANYTHING! I have just tried really hard to stop making comparisons whether I feel like I am "better off" or "worse off" in whatever area I am thinking about.

[Jenny in Atl]

Music, reading, watching a great movie, walking/exercise, spending a quiet evening with my dh, learning a new skill or craft, taking pictures of my kids and animals, working in the garden, sitting in the yard on a cool morning and listening to the world around me, star gazing...

 

Even though I'm lapsed, I still enjoy going to a high service from time-to-time. Always liked the history and tradition of the mass. Really just being thankful I am alive and have this time no matter how hard it can be at times.

:grouphug:

[Sharon H in IL]

Cleaning and organizing.

 

I know, I know, I'm wierd. :D But someone (probably here) said that when you're feeling discontented and envious about what you don't have, go clean what you have. It's soothing.

 

And when you're done, it looks so much nicer that you can appreciate it again.

 

Reading good, deep writing also helps me keep my emotional balance. Marilynne Robinson's "The Death of Adam" or Will Durant's "The Story of Philosophy" are both interesting, and both are perennial favorites of mine. Just reading a bit makes me feel as if I'm sitting down for a long quiet conversation with an intelligent friend.

 

Even better if you should have such a friend IRL. I wish you good friends, and good company, good appetite, and good meat. :grouphug:

[Laura K (NC)]

Not just your own family, because resentment can build among those you love the most, but go out and do some kind of charity work, and however few hours you do it, make those hours non-negotiable.

 

Here's a case in point:

 

One woman has lupus, fibromyalgia, stroke. She can get around with a walker, can drive, can go to book clubs for herself, but she has been struggling so long with her physical situation and her tendency toward depression that "herself" is most of what consumes her, especially now that she is retired. She doesn't like to go out in public because she doesn't want to be seen as a "cripple." She fights with her husband constantly, who is the one person closest to her, and the one she loves and depends on the most. I know this woman well.

 

Another woman is confined to a wheelchair. I only saw her once. She was coming out of a nursing home with a beautiful golden retriever. She was gracious and pleasant. She had far worse physical problems than the first woman, but she went outside herself to help other people, and she not only gave herself, but she shared her precious dog, too. She didn't have to do that.

 

Both women were equally busy, I'll wager, but one woman takes the time that benefits herself just as much as it benefits others. There will always be people worse off than you, but then again, quality of life isn't just physical well-being or financial freedom or lots of family and friends around you. It's how grateful you are for the tremendous gift of life, and how well you realize that joy is found in everything that is created, and how grateful you are for the smallest good things, and how much you want to share that goodness with others.

[muffinmom]

Events in my life recently have given me a much-needed reminder that my hope is in the Lord, not in all the promises of this world. Remembering that, deliberately remembering, is giving me peace.

 

That and deliberate thankfulness--for everything, even those things that don't appear to be blessings. There's always something good to find there.

[chaik76]

I'm a "glass half-empty" kind of person, so even when something is going really well, I have a tendency to focus on the things that go wrong. I'm trying to overcome this. I do what I tell my son to do: Come up with five things each day that have blessed you!

Reading gives me real joy, and I do that for a considerable amount of time each day.

Watching my baby learn to do new things brings me joy also.

I also find a particular forum I am on to be very soothing and refreshing.

Hope you find (or have already found) your own joy-filled moments!

[newbie]

Painting,

JEt

[E_Edgerton]

First of all, it is okay to have these kinds of days. You are not selfish or taking your life for granted, because sometimes you wake up and wonder if there is something better. When those days hit me, I try to think over all the things that make me smile, wherever you find happiness just focus there, think of the things you have accomplished, the family/friends that love you, things you have learned along the way. Tomorrow is a new day.

[myfunnybunch]

Here's what I do:

http://myfunnybunch.blogspot.com/2006/08/blueberry-cobbler.html

 

You'll have to bear with the story :-) . It's just how I think.

 

Cat

[Happy]

Someone else mentioned awareness. I agree. Paying attention to things around you can bring you great peace, pleasure, and delight.

 

I'm a nature girl. Love being outside, love gardening, raising critters, or just observing the world around me. The other day I noticed a a kildee bird acting differently from normal. Because I've seen this behavior before, I started looking behind the bird. And there is was about 30 feet behind mom...a small fuzzy golf ball on toothpick legs. :001_smile: In the days since, I've enjoyed getting out that memory and smiling over it. A precious slice of time captured in the memory banks of my mind. I've been giddy lately over two water lily blooms in my pond experiment. You may find satisfaction in great quilting fabrics....

 

I always tell someone who is losing a parent to a termial disease to watch for the bits and moments of joy and to stuff those in their pockets for taking out and savoring later. When you start *looking* for joy or delight or purpose, you start finding it. It's kinda like looking for a certain color. When you start looking for the color persimmon or cobalt, it is amazing how many things, large and small, you find. To inapporiately paraphrase...if you seek, you will find. ;)

 

Because my joy is in the Lord, I actively look for ways he is blessing me and give thanks when I see them.

 

Oh...and....some significant porch swing time, a fat novel, a soft breeze, and a Texas Ranger broadcast on the radio is a practical way I find delight in my life.

[alaws]

For me, staying away from stores, catalogs keeps discontentment from escalating. Also, just having to consciously remind myself daily of the many blessings I have - it's easier to dwell on what we don't have rather than what we do have. Amazingly, lately I've been going on walks with my dog and my family at night, and that has helped to clear my mind. Exercise does help my moods to improve. And having a friend to talk to does wonders.

[dragons in the flower bed]

I am struggling with this. How do you find joy in life?

 

Imagine life without something that I have. Dance with my kids. Listen to music that stirs up that mood. Go on media blackout, even for just a few days. Practice yoga, or any other physical discipline. Sleep more. (Lack of sleep inhibits the ability to remember memories that don't have stress attached to them.)

[Peela]

Look for the blessings rather than focus on the negatives.

 

Take time alone, get up earlier than everyone else and meditate, go to bed early, go for walks in nature, eat well, take care of myself, have baths.

 

Cuddle the rabbits.

 

Blob out on the computer, or watch a good tv show, until I feel better again.

 

Stay fairly organised so things don't pile up.

 

Just try and stay in the moment, and get through the moment, rather than worrying about the future.

 

Cook.

 

Listen to music.

 

Rearrange furniture.

 

Go shopping.

 

Read an inspiring book, or even a novel. (I don't read novels much because I get so addicted to a good one, it takes over my life).

 

Try and accept myself, and whoever I might be mad at.

 

Do some healing work, forgiveness work, letting go of toxic emotions work, some inner work.

[gandpsmommy]

Imagine life without something that I have. Dance with my kids. Listen to music that stirs up that mood. Go on media blackout, even for just a few days. Practice yoga, or any other physical discipline. Sleep more. (Lack of sleep inhibits the ability to remember memories that don't have stress attached to them.)

 

You know, the lack of sleep may be a big factor. I think I need to seriously re-evaluate how I can get a good night's sleep on a consistent basis. Thanks.

[Kelli in TN]

My life was a dark, joyless void. I had a difficult (that is putting it mildly) relationship with one of my teens, in addition to all of the challenges of everyday life. I used to literally pray that God would just let me go ahead and check out of life early because life was too hard.

 

Something had to change. So I grew a ginormous tumor on my ovary. It provided hours of intense physical pain each day. It also provided confusion, fear and frustration as I tried to navigate through the medical system of my town looking for answers. It gave me a chance to face my own mortality because you can't biopsy an ovarian tumor and if it is that big and malignant, well, you are probably going to be checking out of planet earth sometime soon. Real soon. Fortunately the tumor was removed and it was benign.

 

Suddenly I was looking around and nothing in life had changed, the horrible situtation with my teen was the same, every day life was the same. But I LOVED my life and there was nothing I wanted more than to live my life.

 

Some of my life circumstances got much worse before they ever got better. But it's okay. I would not trade my life for anything. It doesn't look like much from the outside, but it is all mine.

 

And that is how I stay content.