Hormones, hormones, hormones

[Kelli in TN]

Let's talk about hormones.

 

Let's talk about Dr. Lowe. Yes, Dr. Lowe. Why should we talk about Dr. Lowe? Well, because Dr. Lowe is from California. And we folks in the middle of the nation think that those Californians are not thinking straight.

 

So Dr. Lowe walked into my preop room that fateful summer day. We talked about the big tumor. We talked about the ovary it was attached to. We talked about how hard it is to get an I.V. into my crazy rolling veins. And then we talked about my uterus. Yes, we did.

 

I said "Dr. Lowe, I am finished with this uterus. It has served me well. It has performed it's duty six times over. I believe, since you are going to be slicing and dicing on my abdomen in about 45 minutes, while you are fiddling around with my insides, you should just take the uterus out. After all, it is only making my life miserable ever blasted month for one whole week. I would like to be done with this. Please."

 

Dr. Lowe looked at me and said "When I was in California I found that women who did not have their uterus' (uteruses, uteri) felt less womanly. For that reason I refuse to remove healthy organs."

 

 

And so every month, around the 10th or so, I contemplate getting a Dr. Lowe voodoo doll and sticking a pin in it right where I am having cramps.

 

But I don't. Because that is irrational. It is much more rational to sit on the kitchen floor and weep because the fancy shmancy Price Pfister built in soap dispenser has not worked in two years. Yes, that is the height of rational. I should get a rational award. Or a new Price Pfister built in soap dispenser.

 

And why is my family avoiding me? They won't even make eye contact with me. They shield their eyes and run away from like they think I am channeling some evil spirit. What's up with that?

 

And if my husband says "I'm sorry, Dear" in that patronizing tone one more time I am going to shave one of his eyebrows off while he is asleep.

 

And why do all the undercabinet lights in the kitchen just flicker and not turn on. The. kitchen. is. dark. I tried to explain this to my husband and he did not seem to hear me so I tried shrieking at him in between my sobbing over the soap dispenser. He just looked at me and said "I'm sorry, Dear." and walked away.

 

And who ate the last of mint chocolate chip ice cream anyway?

 

I did not want the undercabinet lights to be flourescent because I hate flourescent lights. But somebody overrode my opinion and had the contractor install floureshcent lights. Now they only flicker and rarely turn on. I hate them. I won't say exactly who ordered them, but I will give you a clue. He has a beard. He sleeps in my bed. You will recognize him tomorrow because he will only have one eyebrow.

 

Can nobody else smell this dog? Why am I the only one who notices that these dogs need a bath?

 

I'm just sayin'.

[Amy in Orlando]

:grouphug:Kelli - I nodding and agreeing with you here. It's horrible and it's insane isn't it? It was just a few weeks ago that I burst into tears because (in my own words)"You're breathing really loud and you're doing it on purpose!" I said this to my oblivious husband. And I was very serious when I said it.

 

FWIW, I think the voodoo doll sounds completely rational.

[Kelli in TN]

:grouphug:Kelli - I nodding and agreeing with you here. It's horrible and it's insane isn't it? It was just a few weeks ago that I burst into tears because (in my own words)"You're breathing really loud and you're doing it on purpose!" I said this to my oblivious husband. And I was very serious when I said it.

 

FWIW, I think the voodoo doll sounds completely rational.

 

My husband breathes loud. He always blamed it on his allergies, but you might be onto something. He might be doing it on purpose. Just to bother me. I think I will go in the bedroom and wake him up and have a talk with him about this right now. Don't you think that is a good idea? Just get things out in the open. Open communication and all that stuff.

[Jenny in Atl]

:grouphug::grouphug:

I'll try not to get to hormonal myself or I'll have a heart palpitation, thanks to my no longer needed "womanly" organs. :blink:

[Amy in Orlando]

My husband breathes loud. He always blamed it on his allergies, but you might be onto something. He might be doing it on purpose. Just to bother me. I think I will go in the bedroom and wake him up and have a talk with him about this right now. Don't you think that is a good idea? Just get things out in the open. Open communication and all that stuff.

 

:lol:When you're done talking to him about the breathing thing, come here and explain to Mike why I'm out here snorting and laughing with tears streaming down my cheeks. Hurry up - go wake him.

[*anj*]

And so every month, around the 10th or so, I contemplate getting a Dr. Lowe voodoo doll and sticking a pin in it right where I am having cramps.

 

[percytruffle]

Oh Kelli, I was sitting here reading your post nonchalantly, nodding in agreement in a "been there done that" fashion until I came to the eyebrow shaving part at which point I burst out laughing, tears rolled down my cheeks. So, dh, sitting at his computer a mere ten feet away asks me what's so funny. Of course I just had to share your post with him. It was too good to keep to myself. He laughed as well, although, now he's kind of looking at me suspiciously every once in a while. You know, that out-of-the-corner-of-your-eye look. I think I even saw him stroking his eyebrow. Should prove to be an interesting month here!

 

Hope you feel better and thanks for the laugh!! :grouphug:

[percytruffle]

Look, dh isn't in his computer chair anymore...

[Aubrey]

Oh. my. goodness! I don't think I've *smiled* all day! This angry look? It's tattooed on, to, um, protect my unborn baby from, uh, strangers. Who talk. And smile. :glare:

 

Dh swings back & forth between actually trying to reason w/ me (read: fight) & agreeing w/ me so wholeheartedly that the turkey on my sandwich is in fact ham & that's why it tastes weird (etc.) that I'm so taken off-guard that I laugh & can be...more tolerable?... for a minute or two.

 

I tried to hide in the bedroom tonight while they ate dinner, but dh came to retrieve me. I explained w/ my dragon face that I couldn't stand to be around any of them (him or dc) any. more. tonight. But that I didn't really want to be alone. "I understand," he said. And escorted me to the table. LOL

[Elaine]

Oh, Kelli! :lol: Girl, you totally cracked me up with the one eye-brow comment.

 

I'm sorry that you are having a rough go if it, and I am all for the doll.;)

[klmama]

:lol: Oh, Kelli! Thank you for sharing this post! I needed to laugh!

 

I hope you feel better very soon. Take some Pamprin, if you have it, and drift off into a blissful sleep. Tomorrow will surely be better. :grouphug:

[Unicorn.]

Kelli, I am soooooo right there w/ you today. I have tears running down my face- only I don't know if they are happy ones or not- sigh. As for the husband breathing too loud, I thought mine was the only one who did that. I think it's a conspiracy. I say we all get Dr. Lowe voodoo dolls and while we're picking those up, we might as well get ones that look like our husbands too! :0)

[sdWTMer]

Kelli,

 

Hang in there. So sorry that you are going through rough times! Not good at all!

:grouphug:

[Peela]

:lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol:

[nakitty]

Amen my sistah!!! LMAO....that was fantastic! And :grouphug: I have a prolapsed uterus...darn thing is BEGGING to come out....and yet my gyn said "no, it isn't prolapsed enough..." WHA???? So does the darn thing have to be hanging between my knees before they will just remove it???? ARGHHHHHHHHHH I am done with it...take it, take it PLEASE! :lol:

[Mom2legomaniacs]

:grouphug:Kelli - I nodding and agreeing with you here. It's horrible and it's insane isn't it? It was just a few weeks ago that I burst into tears because (in my own words)"You're breathing really loud and you're doing it on purpose!" I said this to my oblivious husband. And I was very serious when I said it.

 

FWIW, I think the voodoo doll sounds completely rational.

 

OMG! I have told DH the same thing. Open your mouth for heavens sake! Obviously your nostril passage is blocked causing that annoying whistle. Just open your mouth!:lol:

[Mom2legomaniacs]

Kelli,

 

You make me laugh. Yet, I totally get that. Especially this week. I apologized to my older for my, umm, grumpiness while explaining those hormones. He just smiled, apologized for annoying me, and said he loved me. Good boy, that one.

[Marie in Oh]

but my uterus is currently in use right now. I am not quite done with it. :lol:

 

I spent last Firday crying for a good hour because. . . well, just because.

 

It is hard to explain. Sometime I just feel like I am going to blow. My ds 10looks at me like I am an alien sometimes. I feel like I am one.

 

I have been pregnant so many times in the last 11 years/ and nursing the rest of the time, that I have had about 13 cycles since 1997. But my hormones are still all awack. I still feel irritable all the time.

 

Hugs to you Kelli, and everyone else out there that understands. :grouphug:

 

And thanks for the good laugh. :smilielol5:

[momofkhm]

I had to read it to those at home - dd13, dd11, and ds. I told ds he wouldn't understand, but he just stood there. I read it. The kids just looked at me. I knew they wouldn't get it. Well, dd13 did. Not to that extent, but she did get it.

[bkpan]

:smilielol5::smilielol5::smilielol5::smilielol5:

 

That was really wonderful. You should write stuff. Really.:lol::lol:

 

Kim

[Mom2GirlsTX]

You are one funny woman! Thanks for the laughs :lol::lol::lol:

[Kelli in TN]

And then.....I am sitting here drinking coffee and trying to pull myself together because I have to go work at the curriculum fair which will require being somewhat friendly and rational, two things I am NOT, and just as I take a drink a fly decides to commit suicide by drowning.:glare:

[jail warden]

(((Kelli))) I'm so sorry! Men just need to learn to listen to us, we know what we're talking about! I hope things start to get better. :grouphug::grouphug:

[Athena]

Thank you so much! That was wonderful. I will be sending you a voodoo doll for Christmas this year!

 

-Christy

[Basketmaker Amy]

LOL...you are too funny! At least you still have a sense of humor...Hope your day is GREAT!

[muffinmom]

From one hormonal mess to another...I thank you.:smilielol5:

[mumztheword]

:smilielol5:

[Aubrey]

just as I take a drink a fly decides to commit suicide by drowning.:glare:

 

This is a running joke here. Is this your coffee? dh will ask me. Does it have a bug in it? If so, it's mine. Sometimes he loses a coffee ground in a cup, but only if it's mine. But generally, while he's insisting it's a ground, I'm counting legs.

 

I had a fly kill itself in my WATER yesterday. Now, I like coffee & lemonade & tea sweet enough you can sink your teeth in, so I figure I deserve the bugs in those. But water? Honest, I don't sweeten it!

[HRAAB]

That's the first time I've smiled today. The man who promised he'd take our 10 mean, rotten, nasty roosters is backing out, and I've been arguing with UPS for 3 days now because the forgetful driver forgets my package. And I'm not even hormonal right now.

 

I am so done with my uterus; it served me well, thank you God, but I've finished with it. So why do I have go totally psycho every month?

 

You should write a book for the middle aged woman...

 

Janet

[jmgconner]

:lol: :lol: :lol:

 

Oh my! This is priceless. The breathing loudly - I've actually said that, in full blown tears, to my DH. :lol: :lol:

 

I think we need to start a poll. Do women really feel less womanly without a uterus? When we make the final decision that we're done with it, I want mine OUT!

[JudoMom]

You crack me up.

 

Last night, as I was almost in tears telling dh about some co-op issues, he touched the lone pimple on my chin and said "Oh, is it that time already? That explains some things".

 

He might be joining the one-eyebrow club for men :glare:.

[Kelli in TN]

You crack me up.

 

Last night, as I was almost in tears telling dh about some co-op issues, he touched the lone pimple on my chin and said "Oh, is it that time already? That explains some things".

 

He might be joining the one-eyebrow club for men :glare:.

 

He touched the pimple?

 

And he still has that hand? How can that be?

 

What kind of lunatic-with-a-death-wish touches the pimple of a woman in the throes of hormone he**?

[Wee Pip]

Thanks, I need a place to rant. I'm feeling awful:( I need pity. Two months ago, I had a cortisone shot in my shoulder. Little to no side effects, they said. It doesn't enter your bloodstream, they said. Two months later and I've had THREE periods in ONE month. Stomp stomp growl. I am having cramps and I'm in pain. I keep going in to the gyn for tests, but its probably this blasted cortisone shot. The gyn said it can hang out in my body for 4-6mths. ARgh. I keep reminding dh of how well I'm doing emotional, and just how few screaming fits I've actually thrown despite the fact that I've had 3 periods in 1 month, and feel cramping and headaches and exhaustion, and keep trying to love my family and meet their needs, even though I just want to crawl into bed and wake up next year. But it just isn't appreciated like I think it should be. I'd like a blue ribbon that says "Mother of the year for holding it together emotionally despite all odds".

 

We're having chocolate no-bake cookies for lunch. Because I said so. And I didn't put raisins in it, even though dh will come home and ask why I didn't put raisins in it. Its because I'm having a perpetual never ending period and I don't want raisins in my no-bake cookies.

 

Can I donate my uterus and consider it a good deed?

[Danestress]

Please please please don't get mad at me because I love you all so much.

 

But is this really about hormones?

 

Because I'm a normal woman (mostly) and I can't relate to any of this at all. I don't think my husband has seen me cry since last year when a friend's son died. I can't imagine getting this way every single month. Is it really like this every month? And is there really nothing you can do about it? No herbs or supplements or something? Exercise? Can you sometimes just decide that you aren't going to act this way, or does it feel out of your control?

 

Is it really truly just the hormones? And do you have more of them then me or do they just affect people differently? I would just die if I had a daughter and she cried all the time about nothing.

 

Or am I just totally going to get smeared with some kind of hormonal blast when I hit menopause?

[Mom2legomaniacs]

Please please please don't get mad at me because I love you all so much.

 

But is this really about hormones?

 

Because I'm a normal woman (mostly) and I can't relate to any of this at all. I don't think my husband has seen me cry since last year when a friend's son died. I can't imagine getting this way every single month. Is it really like this every month? And is there really nothing you can do about it? No herbs or supplements or something? Exercise? Can you sometimes just decide that you aren't going to act this way, or does it feel out of your control?

 

Is it really truly just the hormones? And do you have more of them then me or do they just affect people differently? I would just die if I had a daughter and she cried all the time about nothing.

 

Or am I just totally going to get smeared with some kind of hormonal blast when I hit menopause?

 

What?!? No hormonal things, for real? Just kidding. I think they affect different people differently. Now that you put it out there, you just might get smeared at menopause;).

 

Sometimes there are things you can do about it. But finding those things can be hard. Like a needle in a haystack for some. And some of those things are not without their own set of complications and side effects. So basically, things can really stink!

[JudoMom]

He touched the pimple?

 

And he still has that hand? How can that be?

 

What kind of lunatic-with-a-death-wish touches the pimple of a woman in the throes of hormone he**?

 

Yes. He touched.

 

We were in the driveway (the poor guy was just swinging by the house to pick up tennis equipment so he could play tennis with ds8). And our sweet neighbors who are trying to sell their house had a family that had just finished looking at it in the driveway talking to their realtor. So I deferred immediate satisfaction for the common good.

[percytruffle]

A legitimate question. You are certainly in the minority. I copied this below from this site.

 

PMS: Key Q&A

 

 

What is premenstrual syndrome (PMS)?

Premenstrual syndrome (PMS) is a group of physical, emotional and behavioral symptoms that commonly occur in the two weeks prior to menstruation.

 

What is PMDD?

Some women experience premenstrual symptoms so severe that they interfere with daily activities. These women have a condition called premenstrual dysphoric disorder (PMDD), which is diagnosed under specific criteria established by medical authorities. While the symptoms are similar, PMDD is considered a separate disorder from PMS.

 

What are some common symptoms of PMS?

There are more than 150 symptoms attributed to PMS, but most fall into one of two categories, physical or emotional/behavioral. Some of the most common physical symptoms are abdominal cramps, breast swelling, breast tenderness, fatigue and bloating. Some of the most common emotional/behavioral symptoms are irritability, hostility, aggressive behavior, anxiety and depression.

 

How common is PMS?

PMS is common among women of childbearing age. Most women experience some of the symptoms associated with PMS at some point in their lives, but not all women have the syndrome. Estimates of the exact percentage of women that have PMS vary widely. According to the National Institutes of Health, an estimated 75 percent of menstruating women experience some form of PMS.

 

What causes PMS?

The exact cause of PMS is unknown, although there are several factors that appear to contribute to its occurrence. Some women are particularly sensitive to the normal fluctuations of hormone production during the menstrual cycle, while others react to the changes in serotonin, a brain chemical that affects mood. Women with vitamin deficiencies and those who consume excessive salt, sugar, caffeine or alcohol may also experience PMS symptoms more frequently.

 

How is PMS diagnosed?

There are no tools or tests that can be used to conclusively diagnose PMS. Rather, doctors determine whether an underlying medical condition is causing symptoms. If a medical condition can't be found, then doctors recommend patients keep a menstrual diary to identify the type of symptoms experienced and track when they occur during the menstrual cycle. If symptoms occur in a predictable pattern in the two weeks before menstruation and then cease when menstruation begins, PMS is diagnosed.

 

How is PMS treated?

PMS is treated in a variety of ways. First, doctors might recommend lifestyle changes such as eating a well-balanced diet, taking vitamins, exercising and reducing stress. Both over-the-counter and prescription medications are used in patients with more severe symptoms.

 

Can PMS be prevented?

Because its cause is unknown, there is no known way to prevent PMS. However, making lifestyle changes can help prevent or reduce the severity of symptoms.

[percytruffle]

...and when in doubt, consult the Mayo Clinic.

[crazycoffeechic]

Please please please don't get mad at me because I love you all so much.

 

But is this really about hormones?

 

Because I'm a normal woman (mostly) and I can't relate to any of this at all. I don't think my husband has seen me cry since last year when a friend's son died. I can't imagine getting this way every single month. Is it really like this every month? And is there really nothing you can do about it? No herbs or supplements or something? Exercise? Can you sometimes just decide that you aren't going to act this way, or does it feel out of your control?

 

Is it really truly just the hormones? And do you have more of them then me or do they just affect people differently? I would just die if I had a daughter and she cried all the time about nothing.

 

Or am I just totally going to get smeared with some kind of hormonal blast when I hit menopause?

 

I know I'm starting when I snap and say something ulgy to Dh and it's not like he's saying anything out of the norm, he's just being his usual smartbooty self. I don't know what it is, but every time I will end up saying something out of the ordinary that I usually don't say and it sounds bad, cause I don't talk like that.

[JudoMom]

Please please please don't get mad at me because I love you all so much.

 

But is this really about hormones?

 

Because I'm a normal woman (mostly) and I can't relate to any of this at all. I don't think my husband has seen me cry since last year when a friend's son died. I can't imagine getting this way every single month. Is it really like this every month? And is there really nothing you can do about it? No herbs or supplements or something? Exercise? Can you sometimes just decide that you aren't going to act this way, or does it feel out of your control?

 

Is it really truly just the hormones? And do you have more of them then me or do they just affect people differently? I would just die if I had a daughter and she cried all the time about nothing.

 

Or am I just totally going to get smeared with some kind of hormonal blast when I hit menopause?

 

It is hormones here. I normally have a positive, happy outlook on life. I'm a glass half-full kind of girl, and if I get in a funk I can usually shake it by taking a nap--but even if that doesn't work a good night's sleep cures it. What I'm saying is that I'm rarely depressed for more than a day, and even then I can mind-over-matter it.

 

But ever since I had my last baby, I get depressed for a few days to a week before my cycle starts. I get almost nothing accomplished, I'm snippy, and there are hours/days where I'm just holding back the tears (and there is nothing to be upset about). I start doubting my worth, and I get paranoid that none of my friends actually like me. I post less here, because I don't think anyone wants to read what I post. I feel like I'm a bother to everyone. They are very irrational thoughts, and I know that in my logical mind, even at that time, but they are still very real.

 

I haven't found anything to help it. I worry about taking medicine, and I worry about taking herbs. I exercise everyday. I try not to let how I'm feeling effect those around me, but the feelings are still very real.

 

Maybe you'll get slammed at menopause, maybe not. I hope not :001_smile:.

[Kelli in TN]

Please please please don't get mad at me because I love you all so much.

 

But is this really about hormones?

 

Because I'm a normal woman (mostly) and I can't relate to any of this at all. I don't think my husband has seen me cry since last year when a friend's son died. I can't imagine getting this way every single month. Is it really like this every month? And is there really nothing you can do about it? No herbs or supplements or something? Exercise? Can you sometimes just decide that you aren't going to act this way, or does it feel out of your control?

 

Is it really truly just the hormones? And do you have more of them then me or do they just affect people differently? I would just die if I had a daughter and she cried all the time about nothing.

 

Or am I just totally going to get smeared with some kind of hormonal blast when I hit menopause?

 

Absolutely, without a doubt. And the older I get the worse it gets. It starts building about 48 hours before I start. I am emotional, crampy, tired but cannot fall asleep, headaches, backaches....I could go on. Then the first day of the cycle is so bad that it is hard to go anywhere because I cannot be away from a restroom for more than 45 minutes to an hour at a time. I am sure you can pick up what I mean by that.

 

Yep, I have a really hard part with that part of womanhood. The rest of the month it would never in a million years occur to me to have crying fits.

[nakitty]

Please please please don't get mad at me because I love you all so much.

 

But is this really about hormones?

 

Because I'm a normal woman (mostly) and I can't relate to any of this at all. I don't think my husband has seen me cry since last year when a friend's son died. I can't imagine getting this way every single month. Is it really like this every month? And is there really nothing you can do about it? No herbs or supplements or something? Exercise? Can you sometimes just decide that you aren't going to act this way, or does it feel out of your control?

 

Is it really truly just the hormones? And do you have more of them then me or do they just affect people differently? I would just die if I had a daughter and she cried all the time about nothing.

 

Or am I just totally going to get smeared with some kind of hormonal blast when I hit menopause?

 

 

I never used to get PMS...not at all...no cramping...no crying...no crazy mood swings...NOTHING! Then I had children....I think it started sometime after #2 was born...and it gets worse every year. For me...there is no, "talking myself out of it..." I can HEAR myself being crazy...I *KNOW* I am being completely irrational....but I have very little control over it. For me, it only lasts 2 or 3 days....but then I am only 33...LOL

[umarider]

I never used to get PMS...not at all...no cramping...no crying...no crazy mood swings...NOTHING! Then I had children....I think it started sometime after #2 was born...and it gets worse every year. For me...there is no, "talking myself out of it..." I can HEAR myself being crazy...I *KNOW* I am being completely irrational....but I have very little control over it. For me, it only lasts 2 or 3 days....but then I am only 33...LOL

 

See, now I had the opposite happen... I was hormonal, irrational, etc. BEFORE I had kids. Now, while I may have some irrational moments:D, they are not linked to my period... no, no, no.. they strike w/ little rhyme or reason when my family and I are least expecting them! But at least they are infrequent. But my tune may change soon as the cramps have started to return now that I am approaching "the change" :glare:

[Kelli in TN]

I never used to get PMS...not at all...no cramping...no crying...no crazy mood swings...NOTHING! Then I had children....I think it started sometime after #2 was born...and it gets worse every year. For me...there is no, "talking myself out of it..." I can HEAR myself being crazy...I *KNOW* I am being completely irrational....but I have very little control over it. For me, it only lasts 2 or 3 days....but then I am only 33...LOL

 

That was how it was for me. I remember girls in high school who would miss school because they had cramps and I thought "Oh please, what a drama queen".

 

I repent of that attitude now. Once the childbearing started everything changed.