Big family/small house-how can we make this work?

[Stayseeliz]

There are six of us in a 2 bedroom, 1000ish sqf house. I'm a big believer in less is more but it's getting cramped. Our biggest issue is the fact that our oldest (who is our only boy) will be 11 in the fall and I'd really like him to have his own space. Right now the three biggest kids (almost 11, 8 and 4) are in one room with a full sized bunk bed combo with DS being on the top bunk. It's okay for now but like I said-we're getting squished. The one bathroom is also becoming a hassle.

 

Listening to Dave Ramsey the other day and his thoughts on when to buy a home it would be another 5+ years before we'd be ready. The home that we live in is family owned but not ours. We only pay yearly taxes on the house-so no rent payment. But DH works on straight commission so there isn't much extra left over. We've paid off a good bit of debt living here but we have more to go.

 

Any thoughts or advice on how to make this work longer? I'm getting that "claustrophobic" feeling and I hate it!

[WeeBeaks]

Do you have any yard at all? Use a storage shed and also maybe a treehouse or a fort so the kids can spread out a bit in nice weather?

 

We have 6 but have 1800 sq. Even then HSing it feels a tad cramped. We use our yard at lot.

[happi duck]

Not as big a family, but we do have experience with small spaces.

 

I agree with pp about using the outdoors as much as possible.

 

One bathroom does get old sometimes.

Here are some specifics we use:

we try to reduce how often we all need to be out of the house at the same time

if we are getting in the shower, we let everyone know in case someone needs to use the bathroom first

we have mirrors in the bedrooms so that the bathroom isn't needed for brushing hair etc

we often brush teeth at the kitchen sink

if we do need to all get somewhere in the morning, some shower the night before

if what we are doing in the bathroom isn't 'private' we keep the door open (if someone is washing their face, for example, the door can be open and then someone else can grab their toothbrush or whatever and it feels less like "I'm always waiting for the bathroom!")

[fairfarmhand]

I totally understand, even if I am not in your shoes.

 

I will tell you that one thing that helps me stay in perspective is that Abraham Lincoln's family, all like 8 of them lived in a cabin the size of my living room.

[PrairieSong]

BTDT! We had five kids ages 10, 8, 5, 3, and 1 when we moved out of a 1000 sf house. We did have a finished basement which helped a TON...don't know if you have that...but our kitchen/dining area was tiny.

 

As for the bathroom, the kids bathed at night and dh and I showered in the morning. No one was old enough to put on makeup (except me!) and no one spent much time on hair, etc.

 

We boxed up a lot of stuff when we were trying to sell the house. It's amazing how much you can live without and how much faster it is to pick up with less stuff around. The kids were just as happy.

 

We had a fenced yard with a swing set, sand box, etc., where they played a lot. We had a park three blocks away and we took them there often.

 

We stored things in underbed boxes and also used vertical space. DH installed 12-inch deep shelves in their basement playroom which were SO nice. They had hooks in their rooms for their coats and jackets because our one coat closet was tiny.

 

I had shelves in the basement laundry room that I used as a pantry for canned goods and seldom-used items.

 

Hope some of this helps!

[Dustybug]

There are 5 of us and we live in a 2bdr, 1 bath, 900sq ft house.

 

I regularly purge things to reduce clutter. In a small space, even tons of little things make us feel cramped. We also have a rather large attic space where we can store things that we aren't ready to part with just to get it OUT of the way.

 

We go outside a ton.

 

DH showers at night, late when he comes home from work. The kids all have baths in the early evening and I shower in the morning.

[swellmomma]

Do you have an attic or basement you can convert into another room? We are a family of 5, with 2 big dogs, and now 1 cat plus daycare kids in 1000 sq ft, 1 bathroom. THe bonus is we have 3 bdrms. This past winter was hard too many of us in a tight space. So for next winter I am converting my garage into a playspace. It will be chilly but at least they can play rowdy games and ride scooters etc before we all get stuck inside again.

 

As far as finding places for stuff, get creative in your storage solutions. Under beds, under sofa, anywhere you can find a spot. The less out in the open the less claustophobic it will feel.

 

The bathroom situation sucks, 1 bathroom with all of us is occasionally too impossible. showers 2 kids at night, 2 in the am, and me in the am so we don't run out of hot water. The bathroom door is not allowed to be locked during showers. THat way if someone has to "go" they don't have to wait for the showering/bathing person to finish. They lock it as they step out of the shower so they can dry and dress in privacy though. Our washing machine is also in the bathroom so switching laundry sometimes has to wait until the bathroom is empty and that sucks when I just want to get the next load going. I have an extra sink next to my room so we use that one for teeth and hair instead of the bathroom but have been known to brush teeth in the kitchen and do hair in bedrooms. When old enough for makeup dd will do it in her room.

 

is the master bedroom much bigger than the 2nd room? What if you put the 3 kids in the master bedroom with a curtain divider between the boys side and the girls side and you and your dh in the smaller bedroom?

[Wheres Toto]

We are 5 people in 750 square feet. It used to be a 2 bedroom but we ended up building a very small room out of the corner of our living room, which holds our king bed and a couple plastic drawer sets and nothing else. Our clothes are kept in the largest bedroom, which is where the little guys sleep on a bunk bed. My oldest has the smallest "real" bedroom to herself.

 

Since you said you don't own your house, I would assume you can't build a room, at least nothing permanent. Here's some suggestions I've seen when looking for a solution to small spaces:

 

-use attic or basement.

-use 6 foot bookcases to "build" walls to separate an area of the largest room (living room or bedroom).

-use curtains to separate an area (saw this a lot when I lived in an apartment).

-divide the largest bedroom into two smaller rooms using the bunkbeds as a wall. Put the bed in the middle of the room (or wherever it makes sense for the wall to be), close off the top from one side and the bottom from the other side. Put in a curtain or accordian door. So from one side it would look like a loft bed with a wall underneath. From the other side it would look like a nook bed with a wall above. I've seen this used with someone who had a boy and a girl that got too old to share but there wasn't any way to add or move.

[JFSinIL]

Hubby grew up in a family of six kids - with two bedrooms. The oldest was a boy, then came two girls, two boys, and then a girl. All the girls shared one room, with the older two in bunks. The two middle boys shared a smaller room. A cubby off the largest room was walled off so the oldest boy could have his own space. Is there any corner of whichever room is largest, or a corner of any non-bedroom, that could have some dry wall slapped up and a door hung to give the oldest his own space?

 

Or skip beds altogether and use futons that fold/roll up during the daytime.

[KnitWit]

We had 7 in a 900 sq ft 2 bdr/1 bath. I used totes for everything and then labeled and stacked them.

 

We had 2 sets of bunkbeds with a crib in the middle.

 

For games/puzzles and such, I put all pieces and instructions in ziplock bags and threw out the boxes. I put all the ziplocks, well labeled, in a tote and taped a *master list* to the outside so the kids would know what was inside. I just slid the *boards* down on the inside. I did the same for ANYthing else that could live without its box!

 

We made use of space under beds and behind doors, but again, in an organized way using totes and things that stacked *up*. I labeled everything with words and pictures for ease in keeping it that way.

 

Anything that was not in use all year long got put in the attic. There was no such thing as a *coat closet*. The coat closet got shelves and became a pantry.

 

I remember thinking, like you, that my eldest (who is five years older than the next one down) REALLY needed her own space. When we moved out, we *helped* friends out by renting their home for about a year. THAT home was 4800 sq ft.!!! Guess what my kids did? They all piled in the SAME bedroom again! We had four empty bedrooms in that house! Now they are all much older and there is a 6th child born after we moved into the house we are presently in and the first five LOVE to reminisce about the *good ol' days* in *the little house*. :) It's probably not as bad as you think, so don't lose heart. In five years, when you are READY to upgrade financially, the kids will be ready for sure.

 

I remember when we moved out. My bil was helping us and told me that house was like a compact inflatable raft that starts out as a little square and then you cannot believe how big it becomes. He could not BELIEVE how much stuff we had organized into that little house because it never looked like it. It just kept coming and coming! :lol::lol:

 

I do sympathize with you. There were days I was sure I needed a padded room!!!

[KnitWit]

Oh, the bathroom...in summer, we girls washed our hair in the hose outside. Showers had to be QUICK. In and out!

[KatieJ]

Dh and I both grew up with large families, few bedrooms ( think one boys room and one girls room) and one bathroom. DH's father put a shower in the basement for them to use, mostly in the summer time. It just had a shower curtain around it for privacy, but I think pretty much only the boys used it.

[Stellalarella]

I've often said--you can have people, or you can have stuff.

 

We had 8 of us in a small house. I was feeling very stressed, my husband and I were sleeping in the garage, etc. and we finally made the move to a bigger house, twice the size. Guess what? I still feel really stressed.

 

Apparently I was blaming the small house, but the problem must be me. :tongue_smilie:

 

Eliminate everything extra. If the dishes won't stack, get rid of them--only have stuff that matches and stacks. Take serious count of how many shirts/pants a kid actually needs and get rid of everything else. Toys? very limited. Good grief on the toys. My kids are outside right now in the carport playing "beach" with buckets of water and some towels. I think my kids' favorite toys are blankets and pillows.... I don't think they really need more than 3 toys.

 

God bless you.

[Sharon37127]

We have 6 (parents, ds11, ds8, dd6, & ds5) in a 1000 sf 3 BR house. We rent & live in a very congested area- decent yard space, but nothing big or permanent to enjoy outside (trampoline, swingset...). My husband and I have always taken the smallest bedroom. 2 Big boys in 1 and small boy and girl in other. I'm really liking the "room split with bunkbeds and curtains" idea above. I've wondered what we would do when our daughter got to the point of needing privacy. We currently have 2 sets of bunk beds, but they cause so much trouble and scare me the older and bigger they get. I am thinking of taking them apart, having 2 twin beds, these (http://www.bedbathandbeyond.com/Product.asp?SKU=15120444), and 3 under-bed plastic flat containers on wheels for clothes- no dressers. So, basically, their personal space is contained within the bed itself. Then a few shelves and what-not for "community" possessions- which has been greatly reduced over the years.

 

I also have a goal of being fairly mobile- like being able to move quickly and easily if need be- so we also limit possessions to light-weight items and "plastic furniture" like drawers/dressers and such. Ikea is my favorite place on earth. I also try to avoid attaching too much to the walls. I just think of all the repair that would need to be done when we move.

 

We only have 1 couch in the living room for sitting. (Well, there is an antique chair, but it is about to find a new home.) The kids get "kid seating"- video/game rocker chairs, bean bags... and we do have folding chairs for when company comes. Also, no TV. We use computers for everything. And eventually that we be all laptops with a projector and big screen that rolls up.

 

Linens- I only have 1 set of sheets for each bed, 1 towel per person in family (and 2 spares). Yes, that is it.

 

Purge, purge, purge.

 

And :thumbup1: on staying put and sticking it out to the Dave Ramsey/ debt plan. You will be ever-so-greatful that you waited to buy a house until you are ready. No mater how cramped you are and how much it sucks right now, you are making the right choice to wait. My husband and I, unfortunately, made the wrong decision years ago, and I would rather live in a cramped place forever than make that mistake again.

[VeritasMama]

I have 6 kids, 4 boys and 2 girls. We are fortunate to live in a large house now, but we started out in a 2 bedroom apt, then a small starter home, so I feel your pain. I also grew up in a family with 5 kids, and for a short time I lived in a section of the basement that was screened off from the playroom so I could have my own room :001_smile:.

 

Purge anything you don't absolutely need.

 

Tall bookshelves are great for storage, I bought some plain black 8 ft. bookshelves for $25 a piece at Walmart, but I also have some more expensive nicer ones from Target. I use the closetmaid cubeicals cube shelves and fabric drawers to store things on shelves, they are nice to hide clutter so the room doesn't feel so crowded, and they fit on my regular shelves as well.

 

I put the kids toys in rubbermaid boxes under the beds, and I also have some storage ottomans I bought on clearance after the Back to School sales that I put under the windows for toy storage.

 

My daughters don't have a dresser, I put two sets of rubbermaid drawers that each have 3 drawers in the closet. I hang their clothes on hangers, but the undwear, socks, pajamas and other misc. clothing like swimsuits go in the plastic drawers. We are lucky to have decent sized closets, but you could use a linen closet for this as well, just put some fabric boxes or baskets on the shelves for each child, and then buy a cabinet from Target or Walmart to go over the toilet to store towels and things.

 

We have used hang on the door shoe racks in every bedroom for shoe storage, you could also put these in your laundry room or a hall closet to store misc. items.

 

My kids all have one rubbermaid box that is a keepsake box, they can put anything special they want to keep in it. Whatever they don't put in the box gets thrown out. We have shelves hung on the wall for trophies or awards.

 

Another obvious thing you probably already use are the shower organizers that hang on the showerhead or can be hung in the corner with suction cups. My kids all use the same shampoo, I just buy a huge bottle of suave, so that helps with the bathroom clutter a bit as well. Showers are much more relaxing when the shower is organized!

 

My kids shower at night, when we had one bathroom we also didn't lock the door. Growing up, we each had our own towel which we had to hang on a hook on the bathroom door and reuse every day, my mom would wash them twice a week. She even put our names on them so we wouldn't use other peoples towels.

 

One thing I read about in a blog that has helped us a lot is to keep the amount of clothing we own to a minimum. I get so many hand me downs from others, I feel badly about not using them. But I have learned to let go, and my kids and I are now limited to 5 outfits each, with 1 church outfit, 3 pairs of pajamas, and that is it. I give away anything more than that. That may sound like a lot to some, but with all the clothes coming into the house, that is a downsize for me!

 

I would sell any furniture you absolutely don't need, and then save that money in a fund to buy more furniture when your space increases. The less furniture, the less clutter and the more space.

 

HTH!

[twoxcell]

There are six of us in a 2 bedroom, 1000ish sqf house. I'm a big believer in less is more but it's getting cramped. Our biggest issue is the fact that our oldest (who is our only boy) will be 11 in the fall and I'd really like him to have his own space. Right now the three biggest kids (almost 11, 8 and 4) are in one room with a full sized bunk bed combo with DS being on the top bunk. It's okay for now but like I said-we're getting squished. The one bathroom is also becoming a hassle.

 

Listening to Dave Ramsey the other day and his thoughts on when to buy a home it would be another 5+ years before we'd be ready. The home that we live in is family owned but not ours. We only pay yearly taxes on the house-so no rent payment. But DH works on straight commission so there isn't much extra left over. We've paid off a good bit of debt living here but we have more to go.

 

Any thoughts or advice on how to make this work longer? I'm getting that "claustrophobic" feeling and I hate it!

 

We live in a very similar situation. 6 of us in a 2bd 1ba house around 1000 sq ft. Let me tell you it has not been fun the last couple weeks because my dh is redoing the bathroom. We have a super small yard also so we spend a lot of time at the Y and local parks. Right now the kids all share a bedroom with two bunk beds in it. We really hope to be able to sell next year, but I don't know how we will afford a larger home.:001_unsure:

[nikicole]

This was a nice post to run across today. We are currently shopping for a new home closer to my dh's work. Our current 2200 sq ft home is under contract and we are downsizing to get our finances under control. We've had a hard time finding anything because we're comparing to what we're used to. I'm glad to hear some ideas from all of you and it gives me hope that we'll be fine! :) I'm kind of excited about making it work even. We're also trying to get on the Dave Ramsey bandwagon!

[TammyS]

I feel ya. We are 4 in 700 sq ft. My 13 and 2 year old are sharing a bedroom that is like 8x10. But there is no other choice. I guess it's all about perspective. Our ancestors wouldn't have batted an eye. And city people still routinely live at this level of crowding.

 

Luckily for us, we live in the woods and I have boys, so I routinely send them to the woods to pee if I want the bathroom. We utilize the outdoors a lot. I don't like people indoors unless they are too tired to move around much.:D

 

The only good advice I can give is get rid of stuff until it hurts. Wait a week. Then get rid of stuff again. Personally, I have gotten to the point where I will tell my older one to take clothes off and put in the giveaway bag, if I notice he's wearing something too small. I don't even want it cycling back through the wash again.

 

Good luck!

[Myeightkiddies]

I haven't read the responses and barely was able to read the original post (RA is affecting my eyes today).

 

Convert the garage or part of the garage into more living space - if you have one. It's fairly affordable to do so.

 

Declutter, if necessary.

 

Create a chart with shower/bath schedules on them.

 

A child having his/her own space isn't feasible in your current situation, and it is ok. He'll be fine. Create private spaces by hanging curtains, using bookshelves or other partitions.

 

Be sure to spend time outside as much as possible. Go to parks, festivals, free music events, etc. Get some games for outside and play as a family. Eat dinner outside.

[Pegasus]

Our biggest issue is the fact that our oldest (who is our only boy) will be 11 in the fall and I'd really like him to have his own space.

 

He will be fine. I shared a bedroom with at least one sibling until I left for college. . .and then I had a roommate there too. I don't see a real need for each child to have a private room for sleeping.

 

However, some peace and quiet alone each day IS helpful as kids enter their pre-teen and teen years. How about reserving the room for him alone for an hour or so each day? He could read, listen to music, whatever he wanted to do without younger siblings interupting.

 

As he gets just a little older and you are comfortable leaving him home alone for short periods of time, let him stay home while you take everyone else to run errands and do the shopping.

 

You are doing the right thing, minimizing living costs and paying down debt. Keep your eye on the prize. :grouphug: