JennyD Posted January 31, 2012 Share Posted January 31, 2012 (edited) In reading the assorted recent threads on divorce, I have been wondering -- do any Christian denominations provide for religious divorce? I am most familiar with Judaism, which does have religious divorce. See: http://www.jewfaq.org/divorce.htm. Indeed, a Jewish religious divorce is required to dissolve a Jewish religious marriage. (From what I know, Islamic law also provides for religious divorce, although I am anything but an expert on that and am happy to be corrected if wrong.) In any event, my limited understanding is that the Christian perspective on divorce is quite different, but still rather less than monolithic. Are there denominations that specifically provide a religious structure for divorce? (I know that Catholic annulments are different.) Have there ever been? Any suggestions for further reading on the history of Christianity and divorce? Edited January 31, 2012 by JennyD Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jmac Posted January 31, 2012 Share Posted January 31, 2012 I have never heard of this outside of Judaism or the catholic annulment. That doesn't mean it doesn't exist but I am a senior at a Bible college who loves to study religions and the differences in denominations so if it does exist then I would love to hear about it :001_smile: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lacie Posted January 31, 2012 Share Posted January 31, 2012 The only reason to divorce that is given in the Bible (New Testament) is adultery. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JennyD Posted January 31, 2012 Author Share Posted January 31, 2012 (edited) The only reason to divorce that is given in the Bible (New Testament) is adultery. Are there ever Christian religious processes (as opposed to civil processes) for dissolving a marriage in which there has been adultery? Edited January 31, 2012 by JennyD Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jmac Posted January 31, 2012 Share Posted January 31, 2012 The only reason to divorce that is given in the Bible (New Testament) is adultery. Paul also added that if an unbelieving spouse left a believing spouse then the believing spouse could remarry. But a believing spouse should not leave the unbelieving spouse. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jmac Posted January 31, 2012 Share Posted January 31, 2012 Are there ever Christian religious processes for dissolving a marriage in which there has been adultery? No. Remember divorce has only been this prevalent for a very short time. A person trying to get remarried in a church might have to answer a few questions though Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PrincessMommy Posted January 31, 2012 Share Posted January 31, 2012 I don't think that there is a religious service for Eastern Orthodox divorces, however, there is provision in the marriage ceremony. A divorced person may re-marry in the church (up to 2-3x I believe)...but the service is slightly different from the first marriage. I've not been to one or read the service, but from what I understand, there is some admission of guilt and petitions for forgiveness for the previous marriage. It isn't anything specified (like I'm sorry I did xyz in my previous marriage)... it's more of an overarching "Lord forgive us for mistakes we've made..." And I think it's a priestly prayer FOR the couple coming to be married rather than a prayer the couple prays (they acknowledge with a "Lord have mercy"). It's an acknowledgment that divorce is not a perfect solution, but for whatever reason, and because of human weaknesses, sometimes it happens. BTW, in the Orthodox ceremony there are no promises made like in the Western services. The church realizes that it is potentially dangerous to ask someone to make a promise they may not be able to keep. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MamaSheep Posted January 31, 2012 Share Posted January 31, 2012 (edited) In reading the assorted recent threads on divorce, I have been wondering -- do any Christian denominations provide for religious divorce? I am most familiar with Judaism, which does have religious divorce. See: http://www.jewfaq.org/divorce.htm. Indeed, a Jewish religious divorce is required to dissolve a Jewish religious marriage. (From what I know, Islamic law also provides for religious divorce, although I am anything but an expert on that and am happy to be corrected if wrong.) In any event, my limited understanding is that the Christian perspective on divorce is quite different, but still rather less than monolithic. Are there denominations that specifically provide a religious structure for divorce? (I know that Catholic annulments are different.) Have there ever been? Any suggestions for further reading on the history of Christianity and divorce? In the LDS church there's something called a "cancellation of sealing" that is a religous severing of religious marital covenants and is a separate process from a civil divorce. It's not a ceremony or anything, but there is a religious structure for it. ETA: I should probably also mention that this is only necessary when ending a marriage that was "sealed" in the temple for time and eternity. A marriage performed outside the temple is viewed sort of as a religiously recognized civil arrangement, and can be ended with just a civil divorce process. Edited January 31, 2012 by MamaSheep Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LizzyBee Posted January 31, 2012 Share Posted January 31, 2012 No. Remember divorce has only been this prevalent for a very short time. A person trying to get remarried in a church might have to answer a few questions though When dh and I went to premarital counseling, the pastor who married us asked us why we got divorced. After we gave our answers, he told us that he will not marry divorced people who don't have Biblical grounds for divorce. We both did, so he did officiate for us. So yeah, some pastors do ask about past marriages and reasons for divorce before agreeing to officiate a subsequent marriage. But I have never heard of any denomination that has a provision for religious divorce except the Catholic annulment. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chris in VA Posted January 31, 2012 Share Posted January 31, 2012 There's no liturgy for divorce in the Episcopal Church as there is for marriage. But it's allowed. Dh says he has to get his Bishop's permission to perform the sacrament of marriage for a couple when one of them has been divorced. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jennsmile Posted January 31, 2012 Share Posted January 31, 2012 There's no liturgy for divorce in the Episcopal Church as there is for marriage. But it's allowed. Dh says he has to get his Bishop's permission to perform the sacrament of marriage for a couple when one of them has been divorced. In the LDS church if one has been divorced they have to get "temple clearance" from Salt Lake to marry in the temple. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
justamouse Posted January 31, 2012 Share Posted January 31, 2012 Yes. What she said. Instead of couples making vows, the Church blesses the love that exists between the couple, and there is a lot of pretty earthy language about marriage beds, fruitfulness, and so on. This is even the case when an older couple marries. The Orthodox view of marriage is one of perpetually 'becoming married.' I was married, I am married, I am being married. Today I read an article Fr. Longnecker wrote about the sanctifying work of marriage, so I think that would go along with the perpetual being married, idea, since we are continually being sanctified (and why Marriage is a sacrament) and a vocation. And so, that is what is so incredible about Catholic Marriage, what makes it more than a mere relationship. In the Sacrament of Holy Matrimony, not only do you receive an abundance of sanctifying grace, but you receive a special Sacramental Grace which elevates the natural order of Marriage and perfects it giving you the right, as a gift from God, to receive from Him whatever Actual Graces you need throughout your married life to live the Sacrament in the way God intended. When we say that we take our spouse, "in good times and in bad, in sickness and in health, till death do us part", God is giving us the promise of His guaranteed assistance to cope with the sickness as easily as with the health, with the bad times as easily as with the good. People say to couples who have remained successfully married, "How did you do it?!". People say to Mothers who have had 10 children, "How on earth did you cope?!". People say to spouses who have forgiven the serious failings of the other: "How could you forgive?!". The answer is very simple: "Through the Grace of God!". Sacrament of Marriage at Catholic Pages Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Little Nyssa Posted February 1, 2012 Share Posted February 1, 2012 EO does have ecclesiastical divorce. Usually this is after a civil divorce is already a done deal. In the Greek church, the synod or bishop grants it and there is a lot of paperwork, appearing before the spiritual court, etc, but I never heard of an instance when it was refused. In the OCA, the bishop gives 'permission to remarry' which just involves a request from the local priest and a form to fill out. In each case the idea is that the person has repented (if there was anything to repent of) and is ready to try again. 2 remarriages are allowed, but no more. There is a 2nd marriage ceremony, which is different, as PJ posted, but in practice, often the regular marriage ceremony is used, especially if the 1st marriage was short, there were no kids, and/or it happened a long time ago. According to the church canons, I'm sure there are certain rules for conditions under which a divorce may be granted, such as abandonment or apostasy, (I don't know the whole list) however, in practice, having a civil divorce already would do it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mom2abcd Posted February 1, 2012 Share Posted February 1, 2012 BTW, in the Orthodox ceremony there are no promises made like in the Western services. The church realizes that it is potentially dangerous to ask someone to make a promise they may not be able to keep. Interesting! I wonder if there are promises in a civil service? I would love to observe one or read the protocol. Dh says the legal requirements are different from state to state. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Virg Posted February 1, 2012 Share Posted February 1, 2012 When dh and I went to premarital counseling, the pastor who married us asked us why we got divorced. After we gave our answers, he told us that he will not marry divorced people who don't have Biblical grounds for divorce. We both did, so he did officiate for us. So yeah, some pastors do ask about past marriages and reasons for divorce before agreeing to officiate a subsequent marriage. :iagree: This happened to DH and I also. I had never been married but he had. Our pastor asked us what the divorce was for and then agreed to marry us. It isn't a ceremony though or anything like that. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Joanne Posted February 1, 2012 Share Posted February 1, 2012 The only reason to divorce that is given in the Bible (New Testament) is adultery. That is one interpretation. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Halcyon Posted February 1, 2012 Share Posted February 1, 2012 (edited) The only reason to divorce that is given in the Bible (New Testament) is adultery. It also states that if an unbelieving spouse divorces a Christian, she can remarry. ("But if the unbeliever leaves, let him do so. A believing man or woman is not bound in such circumstances; God has called us to live in peace.") (1 Cor 7:15) God also provides for an expectation of peace for married people. David Instone-Brewer posits three legitimate reasons for divorce for Christians: Adultery (in Deuteronomy 24:1, affirmed by Jesus in Matthew 19) Emotional and physical neglect (in Exodus 21:10-11, affirmed by Paul in 1 Corinthians 7) Abandonment and abuse (included in neglect, as affirmed in 1 Corinthians 7) Edited February 1, 2012 by Halcyon Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JennyD Posted February 1, 2012 Author Share Posted February 1, 2012 Thanks so much for all the replies. Fascinating stuff. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Joker Posted February 1, 2012 Share Posted February 1, 2012 That is one interpretation. Yep! My mom married my dad in a church and it was Baptist in a small, Texas town. She married her high school sweetheart and he started hitting her. The church she was married a second time in (to my dad) deemed it a good enough reason. I honestly can't wrap my head around adultery being ok but not physical abuse. I could see myself trying to work out my marriage problems if dh cheated but not if he hit me. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kiana Posted February 1, 2012 Share Posted February 1, 2012 Yep! My mom married my dad in a church and it was Baptist in a small, Texas town. She married her high school sweetheart and he started hitting her. The church she was married a second time in (to my dad) deemed it a good enough reason. I honestly can't wrap my head around adultery being ok but not physical abuse. I could see myself trying to work out my marriage problems if dh cheated but not if he hit me. Yes. Hitting/Verbal abuse is the no-go line for me. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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