Weather Anxiety in child- what can I do?

[jenn-]

One of my 7yos is an intense child. Under normal circumstances, he is fairly easy to parent. Unfortunately, the boy has issues with weather. In the last couple of weeks he has woken me up to see the weather radar. The first two times it was because of the wind blowing (not hard), so we went around and measured some walls and pointed out that the house has withstood class 2 hurricanes. He hadn't woke me up again until last night. It was raining, again not hard. I refused to show him the radar and DH hollered at him to go back to bed so he left. I peeked at the radar and realized a heavier cell was going to hit soon, so I went down the hall and let him know. Of course, DH now thinks I am enabling his fear. I just wanted him to know it was coming so that he wouldn't freak out and wind up back in my room. He never came back.

 

During the waking hours, rain isn't any better. Gosh forbid the rain include thunder and lightning. He will be curled up under his blanket nearly on top of me.

 

DH is sick of it. He declared at 230am the boy needs help. I wasn't having that conversation at that hour. This is not the first thing DS has feared to this extreme. He was TERRIFIED of moths/butterflies when he was younger, but he outgrew it. I am sure this will take the same path and he will grow out of it, but I don't know if I can handle it until then.

 

Does anyone have a natural, fast-acting, :chillpill: that I can give him on an as needed basis? Any other recommendations?

[Lady Marmalade]

Sounds like it's time for a good weather unit study. Dig deep- find some videos at the library, tons of books, all kinds of things that explain what the weather is actually doing.

 

My DS was a run-to-the-bedroom-in-a-thunderstorm kid, and now he's utterly fascinated by the weather. He loves watching it do it's thing and running and grabbing his weather books to find out exactly what's going on.

 

Personally, I don't see any problem in turning on the TV during a weather event- you can see the radar and images, and the meteorogists generally do a good job explaining exactly what is going on in the atmosphere.

[fairfarmhand]

I would curb the news type visuals of what bad weather does, at least around your son.

 

I think more people worry about this kind of thing because the moment that a tragic storm hits, the news is flashing pictures all over the screen. Every time a storm hits meteorologists jump all over it and make a big deal about it. (at least that is how it is here)

 

I don't know the cure for your son's fear, but as I told my dd this morning there is no safer place to be than in the palm of the Father's hand.

 

I don't know if he needs professional help or not, but it can't help him to have the news on so that he sees what a bad storm will do. He's just 7, and too young to process that the majority of people make it through storms safely.

[sparrow]

I found *myself* getting severe anxiety over weather last year. I had to STOP checking radar. Completely. I had to stop watching local weather reports on approaching storm cells. After several months of a self-induced moratorium, I was able to slowly introduce weather back into my life :tongue_smilie:. I can only describe it as a panic cycle that needed to be broken.

 

No radar :grouphug:.

[The Girls' Mom]

I have an 11 year old with this type of anxiety. Add to that the fact that we have a metal roof, and her bedrom is on the 2nd floor....she's up every time it rains :glare:

 

We've been dealing with this for quite awhile. She finds reassurance from looking at the weather radar on her sisters iTouch. I have also been very matter of fact with her when she wakes up afraid. I acknowledge the fear, tell her she'll be ok, and make her go back to bed. Rinse. Repeat.

 

The good news: Just this week, she stayed in her own bed during a LONG storm for the first time ever. There is progress!

[Kebo]

My kids have all had some type of similar anxiety (airplanes, storms, flies/wasps/bees, driving on the freeway, etc). They have pretty much outgrown all of them. They are anxiety prone, so new fears come up, but we just address them as they do.

 

What I did/do was try to accentuate the positive. When my youngest (age 2 at the time) was scared of airplanes flying overhead, I made a point of finding airplanes that we could wave at -- and we would call out, "Hello, airplane! Thanks for taking people places!". She has no fear of airplanes now, and will excitedly point them out.

 

When my middle child was scared of thunder, I talked about how much I love storms (I do). I would walk out on our patio just to listen to them and enjoy the sound of rain. I would talk about how the wind was "singing". We would smell the fresh smell left behind. No storm fears now.

 

Maybe you could help him learn all about storms and weather. When you have a stormy day, you could have a box of ideas for special rainy day projects you only do then. Or, my personal favorite, make rainy days "cookie days". You could have frozen balls of cookie dough, or slice and bake cookies, that you take out and pop in the oven during storms, so that he associates storms with the smell of baking cookies.

 

Good luck. Anxiety is no fun.

[Happy]

For a few years, our youngest had some anxiety any time it stormed here. It was worse at night. We allowed him to join us in our room. He'd drag his blanket and pillow and sleep on the floor at the foot of our bed. As he grew older, he quit coming in our room.

[lauranc]

My 17 yr old had this issue for years and years. We learned that some things helped him to 'cope' better... but it never got rid of the actual anxiety.

 

Being in his room with a louder than normal book on CD sometimes helped... usually baths did the trick as it was something that immediately relaxed him.

 

I just tried to help him find things to do during the 'weather' that were soothing.

 

Initially I thought it would help if we did a whole unit on weather. But he didn't even want to know the ins and outs of it all. He just wanted nothing to do with it at all. It made him more anxious to talk about it.

 

Time and maturity have helped. He doesn't pace the house feeling anxious when there's a storm now :001_smile:

[maddykate]

Could you use a fan or some other white noise to drown out the sounds of the storm? If he is awakening due to the sounds, that may help. My dd7 is really nervous about weather too, so maybe it is the age. She sleeps with her sister, though, so she just snuggles in extra close during a storm. Thankfully, big sister is patient and lets her.

[Kalmia]

There is a nice picture book called Thundercake that deals with fear of storms. Included is a recipe for Thundercake that you are supposed to bake when you hear the approaching storm. Turns something fearful into a reason for a party.

 

http://www.amazon.com/Thunder-Cake-Patricia-Polacco/dp/0698115813/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1327592253&sr=8-1

[Guest submarines]

I'd be careful about not watching any weather related documentaries. One of them, two years ago, gave *me* anxiety. :001_huh:

 

Is he highly suggesteable? (DD with anxiety is). What about a magnesium drink at night, and telling him that it *will* make him feel relaxed? I explained to DD how magnesium works to relax her muscles, and how her brain gets signals from her muscles, and if her body is relaxed, her brain will follow too.

 

And a :chillpill: for your DH. :tongue_smilie:

[athena1277]

My dd gets worried about things easily. Every time a major weather event is discussed, I always tell her that we are safe in our house. It keeps us dry and away from lightning, thunder is just noise. When bigger events are discussed, we talk about how rare they are. We had a small hurricane last year, so we talked about that it was going to mean a lot of rain and we are on a hill, so no worry about flooding. The big East Coast earthquake last August was harder to deal with as I panicked a bit when it happened, as I had never been in one like that before. There were also a few nail pops that had to be fixed on some walls. After much, much discussion, she has finally realized that it is not likely to happen again. She feels safe about weather now, at least at home. HTH!

[jenn-]

Thank you for all the suggestions so far. We have studied weather and will occasionally bring the books out. This actually backfires most of the time. Then not only is he afraid of normal weather, but freaks out about things that will never happen here, like typhoons. I can't even lie to him and say tornadoes are rare in these parts. We live in AL and just two days ago tornadoes once again ripped through our state. Add to that the storms from last April and his anxiety has just climbed.

 

Showing him the radar seems to calm him down in the moment and during the day, I don't mind. In the middle of the night, not so much. I think I will turn the big floor drying fan on for white noise tonight. That is what we use in our room for white noise and it works well. I am not 100% convinced that his overnight issues are really related to the weather. I think he is having some insomnia issues and then his imagination gets the better of him.

[DianeW88]

I had this problem as a child, passed on to me by my mother and grandmother. :glare: It wasn't really a problem until we were caught in a really bad thunderstorm when I was around nine in my grandmother's house. Her house had a tin roof and it was hailing golfball size hailstones. They broke every. single. window. on the north side of her house and my mom and grandma FREAKED OUT. Took us down to the basement, wailing and carrying on about how we were going to die. Yeah.

 

Needless to say that every thunderstorm after that had me a mess. Unfortunately, I feel like my parents enabled the problem by being too "nice" about it. They tried to protect me from storms, warned my teacher that I'd be frightened during a thunderstorm (she thought the whole thing was absolutely ridiculous...and told me so), and generally coddled me through them when they happened. This didn't help me one bit.

 

What finally did cure it was getting caught in a huge hailstorm with my dad in our car. It was really bad and he had to pull off the road and wait it out because there was no visibility. Since my mom wasn't there, he did what most dads would do. Told me my fears were unfounded, I looked like ridiculous crying over rain, kids would make fun of me if I didn't knock it off, that there was NOTHING I could do about a storm...if it was going to happen, it was going to happen...and I needed to get over it. I watched the hail, saw that it didn't hurt me...my dad even had me get out of the car and stand in it for a bit...and got over it. Seriously, I was never bothered again by severe weather, and I'm not to this day.

 

I think being forced to face your fears head-on is sometimes what is necessary to overcome them. The next time you have a thunderstorm, don't check the weather radar....take you son outside and watch it, stand in it, play in the rain. I love sitting on the porch during a summer storm.

[SailorMom]

Well - I know living in tornado country for 4 years made me edgy.... Of course, I never let on to the kids, but I always had a plan in place.

 

Perhaps that would help? Sit down with him and find out EXACTLY what scares him. Is it the wind? Is it the noise? Is the tornado possibility?

 

I would assume the tornado thing is the big one, and he probably thinks that pretty much any thunderstorm could turn wild...

 

Anyway - make a plan. With him. Set up a safe place that he can go - maybe a cubby in his closet with a book, a flashlight, blankets. Tell him your plan for a storm - and if you don't have one you probably need to make one anyway :) Get him a weather alert radio that will only go off if a tornado is coming :) Then he can stop worrying about watching the news and looking at radar on the computer.

 

Perhaps trying to get him to see the amazing beauty of a Southern thunderstorm would help?? I love thunderstorms here in the south. Where i grew up in California has nothing like it.

 

As far as hurricanes, well - tell him you'll have so much notice beforehand, that you'll be getting out of its way!

[Pippen]

One DH is sick of it. He declared at 230am the boy needs help. I wasn't having that conversation at that hour. This is not the first thing DS has feared to this extreme. He was TERRIFIED of moths/butterflies when he was younger, but he outgrew it. I am sure this will take the same path and he will grow out of it, but I don't know if I can handle it until then.

 

Does anyone have a natural, fast-acting, :chillpill: that I can give him on an as needed basis? Any other recommendations?

 

 

Been there, done that with one of mine for a number of years. Taking his fears seriously is important.

 

The best thing I can suggest for you is to find ways to help him feel empowered over the fears. Talk with him about what it is that would make him feel safer from weather. Maybe a cell phone beside his bed in case of storms? Or an emergency kit in the house? Insect repellant for moths and butterflies;)? Anytime I could come up with something along these lines it not only helped overcome that partitular fear but gave a success to build on (ie "Remember when you were afraid of ___, but you handled it like ____ and weren't afraid anymore?")

[Photo Ninja]

Thundercake (a book) helped my dd. She would bring it to me to read when there was a thunderstorm. It gave her something to do, a short distraction from the flashes and noise.