Black/mixed hair...

[amo_mea_filiis.]

My daughter is mixed, and her hair leans more towards black, not caucasian. She's almost 11 and I'm finally getting an idea of how to manage her hair, with the help of a friend.

 

My mother is a hairdresser and is "yelling" at me for our hair care plan. She says I have to wash (with shampoo) dd's hair at least 3 times week. The hair care plan I'm using involves only a sulfate free shampoo once per week maximum. Less would be better. Weekly is because, honestly I'll start to forget what we did when if it isn't on a schedule.

 

If dd is out and playing in the dirt, of course I'll clean her hair more, but it isn't needed on a daily basis.

 

Daily includes a shower with conditioner and good scalp rinse to get rid of any smells, and I put her hair in braided pigtails until I learn how to do more.

 

I'm curious what all of you say.

[amo_mea_filiis.]

Anyone else?

 

:bigear:

[Mommyfaithe]

Our hair is "ethnic." :D We shampoo once a week and condition well. Leave in conditioner and hair gel are key! I also use Morrocan Oil for moisture.

 

Faithe

[OnTheBrink]

My son has "mixed" hair and before he got dreds he'd wash it and condition it several times a week. I'm not sure what the protocol is with dreds, though.

[alpidarkomama]

I *never* shampoo my Ethiopian daughter's hair. Her hair is very dry and about as curly as it comes! Lots of conditioner in the tub, a different leave-in conditioner after the tub, and oil treatments for her scalp. If dirt/leaves get in her hair, the conditioner gets it out just fine.

[acurtis75]

My daughter's hair is VERY curly. I never wash it with shampoo more than once a week. If she sweats a lot or plays in the dirt I "wash" it with conditioner. I tried a bunch of different products on dd's hair before I found this

 

http://Www.mixedchicks.net

 

It works great for us. I use the adult products because we like it better than the kids stuff. Even when we we are out of town or out of the products we use the methods described on the website for whatever products we're using.

[TravelingChris]

I am guessing that your mother is Caucasian? Not only do the rules for Caucasian hair not apply to non Caucasians but anyone with very dry hair shouldn't wash their hair with shampoo frequently. I am Caucasian and do fine with shampooing my hair once a week. I have dry hair, dry skin, dry everything:001_huh:.

[Mona100]

Poor, poor momma. Let her wash your daughter's hair with the shampoo daily or every other day and see how it will glob up in her hair and make it impossible to comb thru. My mother used to scream at me about the daily shampooing until she started screaming at me about the huge globs she found in her hair. My mother doesn't talk to me about my daughter's hair anymore.

[Parrothead]

My vote was other for "when it needs it."

 

Ask your mother for the bean dip.

[jplain]

This book might be a helpful/educational read for both you and your mom (and your daughter!): Curly Girl. It explains why shampooing curly hair often is a problem, and it also explains in detail what to do instead.

 

If you haven't found the CurlTalk forum, head on over there! The posters there are very helpful. To get started, figure out her hair type. Your description doesn't give me enough to go by, but start by looking at type 3c and type 4. Then go to the subforum that fits best and search/ask away.

 

Good luck!

Edited November 28, 2011 by jplain

[SonshineLearner]

As needed; I would take her to someone use to dealing with the type of hair she has. :)

[amo_mea_filiis.]

Thanks everyone!

 

I did order Curly girls from the library, and am waiting for it.

 

Yes, my mother is caucasian. I plan to fib to her "Yes, we shampoo a few times per week" just so I don't have to hear it! LOL. She doesn't live near me so I don't have to worry about it.

 

Part of my hair care plan is saving to take dd to a black salon.

[abbeyej]

I'm caucasian with thick, curly, dry hair and I don't use shampoo at all. Okay, once in a blue moon (every six months?) I shampoo, but otherwise, I use conditioner only. My hair is in far, far, far better shape since switching to this method (about 6 years ago?)... My hair is *not* dirty. I wash it -- I just don't use shampoo.

[thescrappyhomeschooler]

I'm caucasian with thick, curly, dry hair and I don't use shampoo at all. Okay, once in a blue moon (every six months?) I shampoo, but otherwise, I use conditioner only. My hair is in far, far, far better shape since switching to this method (about 6 years ago?)... My hair is *not* dirty. I wash it -- I just don't use shampoo.

 

Dh and my kids have hair like this. I use a combo shampoo/conditioner once a week on it. It's so dry- that's all it needs. My dh's sister has the same kinky/curly hair and only uses conditioner, but I think she does that about 2-3 times a week.

 

My sister hosted a young boy from Haiti after the earthquake, and the hair stylist told her she was making him wash his hair too often. He recommended once a week for the boy.

[mamakim]

My four mixed daughters have a range of curliness and thicknesses and all use no-poo routines. The younger ones just need it once a week, but with the changes of puberty there comes a move to more frequent condition-"washing". Curlier older dd probably 4X/week, straighter older dd more like 2/3 X per week.

[HandmaidenofChrist]

washed it once a week, and conditioned it nearly every day, when she was styling it.

 

Moroccan oil is very helpful. We also used Pink Oil. I think it is still available and it was pretty reasonable.

 

I am NOT a hair person, and this white girl didn't have a clue how to do black hair when we adopted her @ 6yo. I had to learn and it took awhile before we got it down. She's now 23yo and lived to talk about it. ; )

[Greenmama2]

My vote was other for "when it needs it."

 

Ask your mother for the bean dip.

 

:iagree:

After years of struggling with my daughter's hair, we now follow a loose version of the curlygirl format and the difference has to be seen to be believed. Formerly we already avoided shampoo for DD, now we "wash" it with conditioner once a week or so. She rinses it everyday, which I think is actually too much & contributes to the frizz, butthat's just how she is. She likes to shower.

Not brushing EVER has made a huge positive difference for DD, we use. Wide tooth comb only when her hair is wet & with some spray in conditioner or coconut oil. She has gone from having permanent nearly dreads (within 10 minutes of brushing) to having ringlets.

DD is caucasian but DH has a natural bright red Afro and mine is straight.

[Big Buckin' Longhorn]

I'm black with natural hair and I wash my hair about every two weeks.

 

My granddaughters (2, 2, and 3) are mixed and they get their hair washed about the same. Especially the ones with "tighter" hair.

 

One of them has more "silky" hair than the others and she tends to get her hair washed about once a week, because it does tend to get more oily than it needs to be.

 

I do spritz water on both mine and their hair to ease the tension a little bit when I style it, using a spray bottle.

 

I don't know about you, but hair washing in our home is a pretty big production. I don't know that anyone would have time to do that more than once a week or so.

 

Pass the bean dip to your Mom. In my experience, people just. don't. get. it.

 

E.T.A. I do use a smear of leave in conditioner on their hair every time I style it. I put a BIG glob in mine every day. It's VERY dry.

Edited November 28, 2011 by TejasMamacita
Had another thought to add. :)

[TheAutumnOak]

I am not sure...I am Black and have "mixed" hair...My hair is very curly (more like an afro) and it varies how often I wash my hair depending on the weather...Usually I wash it once or twice a week, but I may condition it more often...I go by how it looks and feels...

 

I would suggest that you wash it with conditioner once a week, wet it and just use conditioner once a week...You will wet her hair twice a week...That should work out fine unless it is super hot and humid where you are, or you use just too many hair products...

 

ETA: Washing it every two weeks can also work just fine...

[thescrappyhomeschooler]

:iagree:

 

Not brushing EVER has made a huge positive difference for DD, we use. Wide tooth comb only when her hair is wet & with some spray in conditioner or coconut oil.

 

Yeah. This. My mother is pretty mortified that I don't make my kids brush their hair. She has insisted on brushing it a few times, which they hate, and they end up looking like a dandelion ready to blow- huge and puffy! I comb it out with some conditioner spray after it's been washed, but that's it. Dh never brushes or combs his hair, either. He wets his fingers and "arranges" it.

[Pamela H in Texas]

I would think conditioning it (assuming conditioner that people are using to Curly Girl style to wash hair then rinsing it?) more than once per week could be problematic also. Of course, I *really* don't know. I'm just guessing because many conditioners are plenty enough to wash hair.

 

With my toddler foster son, who was hispanic and black, I washed it once per week and put leave-in conditioner in it once a day most days (occasionally a second time if we were going out later in the day and I wanted it "perfect"). I rinsed it in it under the sink to get it wet, get out food, get out sand, etc. before putting the conditioner

[MamaT]

I have a mixed dd and an AA dd. They wash their hair every one to two weeks depending on what's going on. They condition every day though.