Work AND homeschool - how do you balance it?

[Shelly in VA]

I am not sure what sort of advice I need here! I am at home with our 4 children (ages 2-13), but I have had to take on part-time employment since last October for financial reasons. I work ~10-15 hrs/week from home, which translates to at night after I put the kids to bed.

 

What I am struggling with is balance. I have tried getting up early to work, but my youngest is 2, so he's already up around 6:30 am. Then, I'm pretty much busy with kids/house all day, until they are all in bed around 8pm, at which time I start work. I have to work 2-3 hours each night, and that ends up stretching into the weekend because some nights I don't get started until later, due to kids' practice schedules, etc.

 

What ends up happening is that I am "winging" school a lot more than I would like to, and I am definitely not waking up refreshed and ready to tackle my day after being up late working. School itself is challenging this year, as all 4 kids are at very different developmental/academic stages (their ages are 13, 11, 6, and 2).

 

So... any advice from those who have BTDT? I don't know if I need to send the kids to school (where the teacher has time to prepare), sell the house to put us into a better financial position (although that's the issue in itself - we moved to MD ~18 months ago, and housing costs here are sky high, but dropping, which probably means we'd lose $ if we sold), or start buying lottery tickets. Just kidding.

 

Seriously - any advice on how to get through this "season" of homeschooling? Subjects to drop, low-prep curriculum to use, etc.

 

Thanks!

 

Shelly

[mo2]

I'm not sure what sort of advice you need either, but I need it too! I am in exactly the same situation, except I work (try to, anyway) 25 hrs/week. My kids are 6 and 1, and it is virtually impossible to get anything done while the 1yo is awake! I hope someone else has some great advice for you, but until then, you at least have my sympathy!

[E_Edgerton]

As a home tutor, I work to supplement a working mom. I basically work 2-3 days a week implementing her curriculum choices and providing care to the kids. I suppose paying someone else might defeat the purpose of you working, but if you found the right person, you may be able to work a little more, provide the educational experience you want for your children, and when the financial issues pass, go back to what you do best! I know my situation is probably an exception, my employer and I have talked at length how rare it is to find a tutor/nanny with homeschooling experience, but it may be worth it. Best of luck.

[saukrivermom]

for 7 months. Part of that time I worked 25-35 hours a week, now I have settled into 20. Working outside the home is better for me than trying to work from home. My kids are older, 2 teens and a 8 year old. My dh is home almost every night. I school during the day and leave for work at 4:40 pm m-th and eoe sat morning 7-12.

 

I never worked with babies, no advice.

Lynn

[Rachel]

As I am a mom of all teenagers this may or may not help you......but I went to work for the first time about 4 months ago and work 4 days a week (2:30pm to 11pm) and am now moving to 2 12-hour shifts 11am-11pm starting in May. It took quite an adjustment for us to make this change.

 

#1 was my husband had to get WAY more involved. And he has! He has a tough job and works 50-60 hours a week, but he cooks most nights, helps with schoolwork in the evenings and drives the kids to activities when he can.

#2 Think ahead. When I was waiting until "the day of" to try to plan what to do........nothing would happen.......so I had to force myself to take a day each week and plan out our week.....pretty detailed too.....and that helped me to stay on track. Without that plan it is too easy to get sidetracked.

#3 Delegate......my kids picked up more chores to do around the house, they found rides for activities and are responsible for more in regards to schoolwork (like checking their answers on things, instead of me correcting all their work and recording their grades)

 

I know these may not all help........but hopefully it may trigger something.

[Catherine]

I work at night-part time, on the weekends. I do 3 12 hour shifts every two weeks. My kids are not babies, youngest is 6, and dh is OK with doing more weekend stuff to allow this to happen. I think doing the work all in one lump of time works much better for me than doing a little every day. Then it's done and I feel like I have my life back for the rest of the week.

[Tap]

I work two weekdays and one weekend day. I homeschool the kids, ds13, dd9 and dfd18mths, in the morning, set up independent activities for after 12pm when I am gone and they are done hsing by about 2pm, (whether I am home or not). If I need time with dd9 and dfd18mths needs attention, ds13 helps out, same in reverse. Dh handles the family on the weekend.

 

 

I obviously don't know your family dynamics but from you little bit of info, I think I would try to implement a schedule like this:

 

You homeschool 4 days a week and work 1 weekday and 1 weekend day. The kids alternate taking care of baby on your weekday while you work. Hubby takes care of baby on the 1 weekend day. Then you have the remaining weekend day as a family.

 

Or

 

You get up with baby at 6am, set up breakfast and independent subjects while the other kids get up 'at the same time'. By 8am breakfast is over, kids are reading or doing subjects that don't involve you. The kids each rotate in 1 hour segments playing with baby. You work from 8-11. Make lunch, put baby down for a nap and then homeschool the kids. If you don't get your work done by 11, then set it aside and catch up at night or on Saturday. It is much easier to get 45minutes of work done at night then a few hours worth.

 

Or

 

You get up with baby at 6am, set up breakfast and independent subjects while the other kids get up 'at the same time'. By 8am breakfast is over, kids are ready to do subject that need your attention. Baby is on your lap or nearby, homeschool kids until lunch and nap time. Nap time is quiet time! Independent subjects, especially reading subjects, are done during nap time, you do your work during nap time. Any questions the kids have are circled and when you are done working, you go to each child and go over what questions they have. You can even take a break each hour to check in with them but don't have them interrupting you or you won't get anything done. Your work is done for the day when baby wakes up. If the baby takes a short nap then assign each kid a play time with baby, at this time, so you can work for at least 2 hours. You go back to homeschooling and finish any work in the the evening or on Saturday AM.

 

I am not sure if you house is more leisurely about routine, but the key is to get a set schedule and to get the kids up and going in the morning. You need to be organized and to have specific times delegated to each activity.

 

I also think that you need to have a specific time that you are allowed to work, then the rest of the day is guilt free. Like the 8-11am in the first example, with finishing during the evening if nec. I wouldn't like having the task hanging over me all day. I would feel stressed all day to know that I should be doing something else. By having a set time, then you are able to focus on your family more freely during the day. If something comes up during your work time, like a phone call or a child that really needs help, then you know you have another time set up (the evening) to handle the lost work time.

 

 

Good luck, I hope you find your groove soon!

Tap

[Hannah]

As a home tutor, I work to supplement a working mom. I basically work 2-3 days a week implementing her curriculum choices and providing care to the kids.

 

I know my situation is probably an exception, my employer and I have talked at length how rare it is to find a tutor/nanny with homeschooling experience, but it may be worth it. Best of luck.

 

This is our situation too! I work 25 hours a week and have a tutor/nanny for my 8yo daughter. I choose the curriculum and set the schedule for them to do in the mornings and then spend about 30min to an hour with dd in the afternoons. It used to be that I tried to touch on everything myself and then set "homework", but now I do writing, math and latin with dd, but the drill gets done in the mornings. We have "history club" where we do SOTW activities with one other family one afternoon a week and "science club" for experiments on another afternoon. She listens to the SOTW CD's and read-alouds with the tutor. This way we've managed to balance my need to be involved with dd's education in those areas and her need to meet up with friends.

 

My 3yo dd attends a wonderful playgroup of 10 children with a teacher (and assstant) I hugely admire. She's there 4 days a week and at home on Fridays. My work is 5 min away from the playgroup.

[G5052]

I've worked part-time pretty much since my oldest was 18 m.o. old, and now work full-time part of the year, thankfully mostly from home. Over time I'm not expecting that to change, and I may be full-time year-round soon. DH is disabled, and we can't afford help -- so I'm pretty much it as far as chores.

 

We do a general clean on Saturday -- bathroooms, vacuum, sweep, dust, etc. and then follow Motivated Moms during the week. I do a load of laudry almost every day. My children do about 30 minutes of chores each during the week and more on the weekends. Most of my errands are done on Saturdays, which I don't like, but it's becoming the only time I have to do that.

 

My kids have an assignment sheet for school and work mostly independently with the exception of Sonlight read-alouds, science, Latin, and Spanish. Even the 2nd grader can do many of her subjects on her own if I'm nearby to help.

 

And frankly we cut back. I don't entertain, and the kids are involved in only co-op (out for the year now) and one year-round sport. With DH's disability and limited funds, we don't travel much at all. That keeps our schedule simple.

 

HTH!

[Peela]

I don't know the answer, but what occurs to me is that if I cut into my essentials- sleep, decent food, some recreation, some exercise- basics- I will burn out in a short time. I couldn't homeschool for long if I was not getting enough sleep, not able to take care of myself. I know people do it, but rarely very well for very long.

So, I guess what i am thinking is, make sure the priorities are there, and the truth is, whatever supports you, makes things easier for you, is what you need to do, so that you can function fairly well. What that means for you, I dont know. I would have my kids work as independently as possible but spend only mornings with them- set them up independently after lunch. I would use some daycare for any underschool aged kids. I would have an afternoon nap in order to be able to work ok in the evening. I don't know what your needs are but in situations like yours I think sometimes you need to think way out of the box and see what works. Good luck. I emphathise with anyone who has to work that much while homeschooling. I work from home too, but it is cooking and serving food, it's stuff I can do while the kids work.

[Call Me Cordelia]

I work 40 hours outside my home. My kids have schedules (the youngest is 8) and do much of their work while I am gone (I work 5 a.m. to 12 or 1). I then go over questions, etc.. when I get home. I also do phonics with the younger two.

 

Frankly, I don't school the way I used to or the way I'd like to. We use much more canned curriculum like Alpha Omega, etc... However, they are still being better educated than the public school.

 

I'd be happy to chat more privately about "tips" :). I worked last year at home about 30 - 40

 

hours a week, as well.

[HSMom2One]

As a part-time work away from home mom I appreciated the tips too. It's so great to get ideas from each other! Tap and Rachel's suggestions are especially good in mho. Peela is so right too, you need to take care of yourself or you won't be able to help anyone else.

:iagree:

 

As I read the op, my thoughts were that you can't expect to do everything yourself whenever you add to an already loaded work day. Homeschooling four children is already a full-time job, so the obvious is that you need some help. Since finances are the main issue for taking this job, it seems logical that the family should pull together more. Can dh help as others have suggested? Are the older children helping with the younger ones? Can the home chores be redistributed? Just from the info that was shared, it sounds like all of the sacrificing is on your shoulders alone. Perhaps there is more going on that you did not share, so forgive me if I'm assuming anything.

 

In our situation it would not be possible to work even part-time without the family pulling together. I work two days a week outside the home. Each of us contributes to dd's schooling in some way, and we share chores. I spend about an hour a week planning the upcoming schoolwork and activities, and we keep to our schedule.

 

:grouphug: I hope you have enough ideas from everyone to make the needed adjustments. Our thoughts and prayers are with you!

 

 

Blessings,

Lucinda

[Audrey]

I work outside the home 15 hrs/wk. and at home another 30-40 hrs. week. I can only manage that because I have a farmer dh who is as committed to our lifestyle as I am. However, I do the bulk of the homeschooling. The time consuming things are: science experiments, hands-on projects and crafts. For the most part, I either try to limit science experiments to quicker ones (and I'll use kits that have everything to save time, too); or I have dh do them with ds; or I chooses things ds can do on his own. The same goes for the hands-on projects and crafts.

 

What really helps though, is having the patience to allow things to settle into a routine. It took a while, but once we got into a groove, everything was much easier. I had to be very flexible during the process (which is kind of hard for me to do!), and it was worth it.

 

Good luck with your new job!

[coffeegal]

I've worked part-time for the last 4.5 years and homeschool 4 children. What works here is that I get up to work from 3:30 to around 6:30 or 7:00. (The first couple of years were hard, it's not so bad now.) The children do their chores and start math by 7:30. I fix breakfast and we sit down to eat when breakfast is finished. (They come to me as they need help with math. It's mostly self-study under my supervision.) I'll often ask my 5yo preschooler to help me cook since he's underfoot disrupting his siblings otherwise. After breakfast, I clean the kitchen while the children continue with their school day, and then I work on phonics with my 5yo. After that, we continue with our school day and if all is well, we'll be finishing the school day by 10:30 or 11:00. Afternoons are spent doing activities, relaxing, or housework. The whole family goes to bed early.

 

Best of luck!

[Tarheel Heather]

I worked second shift. I left at 2:00 and was home at 12:00. We did school in the mornings. I was up at 8:00, ds had his schedule and i worked on reading with dd. My husband worked from home, so in the morning he did what he had to outside of the house. In the afternoon and evenings he would follow up with ds's work. It was not easy!

[Shelly in VA]

Thank you so much for all of the suggestions! This is exactly what I needed. I love this board because of the ability to get input from "fresh sets of eyes" for issues that come up!

 

Thank you; I sincerely appreciate the support and the helpful ideas.

 

Shelly

[Carol in Cal.]

Housework is almost one of them--I just do not have time to keep the house up, and I have had to let that go.

 

Another is Latin, and Dd's German school. I just never quite got to Latin this year, and I pulled DD from German school when the homework got so bad that I was unable to help her with it adequately and still teach her her 'normal' classes.

 

I have an office suite where she can work in private when I have client meetings, so she is near me almost all of the time now. That has been really helpful. If I had more than one child, I don't know that that would have been possible however. What this does in enable me to oversee her work and work with her intermittantly, which is much better for her than if I had to assign her a block of work and then come back later and check on it.

 

I focus pretty hard on the basics--grammar, math, writing, literature, Bible. DD really enjoys history and has taken to listening to the SOTW CD's whenever she has a lunch alone. I'm sorry that she doesn't read in those circumstances anymore, but she sure knows her history, and that is just great. We started using the DIVE Saxon math CD's this year. Although I still do sit with her to do math or review it, I don't have to do that every day anymore.

 

I read to her extensively every night, even though at almost 12 she is quite a reader herself. I read her science, Bible, a little German about twice a week (to try to keep it up to some extent), history, and literature or historical fiction most nights. She also reads science on her own. We don't do very many experiments, but we talk about the ones that we do, and we also talk about what should happen in the ones that don't. As a Chem E major, this bugs me, but I just can't help it and what I am doing is better than nothing by quite a bit.

 

We talk in the car and when we go running together. I fit in extra math and grammar oral review, Bible discussions, and writing topics. That is also a great time to connect and makes it a little easier to say that I need quiet now so that I can work at other times.

 

I don't do much that is intermittant. When I take DD somewhere, it is usually for a full day or half day. So we no longer do any one hour science classes, for instance. (By the time I plan them in, drive her there, stay, and pick her up, I could teach a lot more science and be far less frazzled. It has worked out much better this way.)

 

I plan field trips and immerse myself with her doings when we go on them. We rarely carpool. That way we can talk going to or from, and see friends when we are there but not have to leave when everyone else does.

 

I try to let her have friends over to the office whenever I can, and I host a children's literature group there that meets about once a month. This has helped her to keep up her friendships even though we can't have playdates at home because we are never there and it's such a mess anyway. I almost feel as if I live at my office rather than my home. I am so glad that I got it, but it is a big expense. Sometimes I am concerned about that.

 

I try to evaluate what is working and not working pretty often. Last year I was drowning, and this year I am merely horribly busy. That is progress! This is very difficult, though. I would never have chosen this lifestyle, and I try not to think about it that much. It's the only way to accept it.

 

I pray often (but not as often as I should) about this situation--about fixing it more, accepting it better, doing a good job with it, being diligent in all areas, still being pleasant to people who don't understand or who really should be pitching in more, and being cheerful. In fact, I'm off to pray right now! So I will pray for both of us.

[HSMom2One]

Housework is almost one of them--I just do not have time to keep the house up, and I have had to let that go....

I pray often (but not as often as I should) about this situation--about fixing it more, accepting it better, doing a good job with it, being diligent in all areas, still being pleasant to people who don't understand or who really should be pitching in more, and being cheerful. In fact, I'm off to pray right now! So I will pray for both of us.

 

Carol, your post was a real inspiration to me. Thanks so much for sharing! I, too, hs one dd, but she is still 8 yo. Reading about your lifestyle and committment gives me a lot of hope that I can continue on with it. :bigear:

 

Blessings,

Lucinda

[lollie010]

Thanks for the thread. It is pretty encouraging for me right now. I just started working about 20 hours a week a few months ago. My little ones are not "school age" yet, but I was starting to worry about how it would end up working out. It is great to know that families have figured out ways to make it happen. Right now I am trying to work two long days and fill a few more hours at night or on the weekend.

 

Laurel T.