Would you buy a nice vehicle for your newly permitted teen driver,

[Tammyla]

I'm in the middle here. My teen doesn't deserve a car, but will likely get one after proving she is a reliable, responsible and safe driver. And there will be rules! Hahaha, my rules.:auto: Parenting doesn't end when they become teenagers, and in some ways it gets harder. Part of the job, I guess.

[KidsHappen]

As in maybe two years old and very reliable. Good on gas and good insurance rates. But certainly nothing nicer than what we drive. She will have a need for her own car and she is working her butt off and saving like crazy for it so I would have no problem helping her.

 

She is the only one of the three oldest that we would do this for so far. My oldest two didn't even get their licenses until they were over eighteen and were long since moved out of the house. They didn't have jobs before they left home and had no need for a car.

 

The 14 years old has some reliability issues and will probably not even get her permitted for awhile. After she has her license and is working consistantly then we may reconsider. She is the only one so far that plans to go to college so we may consider it if she is in college instead of working.

 

I guess that it really all depends on the child.

[Janice in NJ]

My dad is a hands-on kind of guy. We lived in the country - parking was NEVER a problem - so he always had multiple older cars licensed at one time. They were all older vehicles so he didn't need collision on them either.

 

Anyway. After we had our permits for about a year, we girls got our licenses. He was happy to provide a car for us to drive. But it wasn't OUR car, it was still his and we knew it. If he didn't want us to go somewhere or do something, we knew that we couldn't use his car. :001_smile: But we respected his generosity by generally abiding by his wishes. And he was always generous toward us. We had wheels. Freedom felt GREAT!

 

My dad was always concerned that we might get into an accident as young drivers. I suspect that he must have thought this one through as he lay in bed one morning. (He still does his best thinking as he dozes between 8 and 9 AM - occasionally staring at that white ceiling over his head.) He stocked the driveway with LARGE, SAFE, AND relatively UGLY vehicles!!!!

 

HOW I LONGED FOR A SMALL, RED SPORTS JOB!!!! Longed. Longed. Longed to have a cool car to drive.

 

My sisters and I got to fight over:

The '71 Pontiac with the REALLY faded blue paint job

The '73 Puke-Green Chevy Station Wagon with the "Brown Paneling" on the doors

Or the peppy (HA!) Volarie with the slightly rusty bumper

 

Needless to say - NONE of us drove fast or recklessly. We didn't want to EVER draw attention to ourselves. EVER. No flash. No glory. Just really mundane wheels to get a kid from place to place.

 

He paid for everything - except the gas. We had to buy our gas. And they were ALLLLLLLL guzzlers. So that limited our jaunts. I suspect that he planned that too. :D He wasn't the bad guy who said that we COULDN'T go somewhere; he was ON our side. He wanted us to have freedom, but he knew that our part-time jobs would naturally limit our car-time. You just can't go far at 9 miles per gallon when you are making $ 3.35 per hour and the nearest town is 7 miles away! :glare:

 

He maintained them meticulously - new brake lines, new tie rods, etc... They were VERY safe. We even learned how to change the oil.... funny that - he seemed to always think it was time for a ten-point maintenance check when I was in my high-heels and my newest sweater. We had such interesting talks during those "checks." Lots of things for a dad to talk about with a teen daughter. Lots! :001_smile:

 

Anyway - my point. I have no intention of putting my kids into "their car." EVER. When they are old enough to afford a car - including the insurance, they may buy one. Until then, we plan to offer them "a" car to drive. Our car. Our choice. :coolgleamA: Anyone have an old El Camino that they would like to sell?

 

Peace,

Janice

 

Enjoy your little people

Enjoy your journey

[PariSarah]

. . . (and, actually, I still think about it from time to time) when he told me that he'd never teach his wife to drive a stick (i.e., "his" car) because "she'd ruin the clutch!"

 

I just couldn't--still can't--fathom taking that attitude to one's own flesh and blood! My dad taught me on a stick. On purpose. I almost told DearFriend that my dad's clutch survived three kids, two of them female, just fine, and that he was being a condescending pr*ck for taking that attitude. But he was a really good friend, so I just offered to teach her myself.

 

She never took me up on it. Shame.

[NicksMama-Zack's Mama Too]

Well, WE have never owned a brand new vehicle LOL, *I* don't believe in spending that much money on them- BUT we've never had "that much money". DH loves working on our vehicles, and we've always bought used. We haven't had many problems with them, except DH's Prelude, but it is an '86 and he has been driving that thing to work EVERYDAY for the past well, he just turned 32 in January and he bought the car when he was 16, so that means he's had it for 16 years! He is currently working on it though, getting it in shape again.

 

Wow, and I though my dh's '89 Accord was ancient! Good for him for rehabing it.

 

My oldest doesn't even WANT to own a car- she says she wants to live in a place with good public transportation, and have a really good bike. :) She is 13. She hasn't said she doesn't want to learn to drive, she just doesn't want to "own" a car. Her long term plans are to travel and live in many different places around the world though, and she's just not into "owning things"- that would just hold her back from travelling.

 

K

[Jeanne in MN]

My first thoughts are what are they teaching their kids by buying them nice cars and not having them pay something themselves. My second thought is, no way. My kids can use our vehicles when they become drivers. They can buy a vehicle later if they want.

[PrairieAir]

No. I don't really believe in buying a car, new or used, for a kid. I've seen that kids who have to work and save for their own car are generally more responsible. They are more careful for the car's sake which helps keep them safer as well. Kids always think they are invincible. They won't drive carefully because they could be injured or killed or do the same to someone else. They don't believe that is possible. If they worked hard to earn that car, they will be more careful not to allow it to become damaged in any way.

[Holly IN]

I am with you (OP). We already told my oldest son (13 years old) who is already saving up for a car, that he will NOT be driving or getting his liscense when he is 16. He will do alot of practice driving with my dh and I. We told him that when we feel that he is ready whether he is 16, 17 or 18, he will go test for liscence. Also we told him that he is better off getting a very used reliable vehicle when he gets his liscence. He is ok with it because alot of his friends were told the same thing. He also has alot of high school friends that are not allowed to drive yet and they are 17 to 19 years old.

 

Holly

[Holly IN]

. . . (and, actually, I still think about it from time to time) when he told me that he'd never teach his wife to drive a stick (i.e., "his" car) because "she'd ruin the clutch!"

 

I just couldn't--still can't--fathom taking that attitude to one's own flesh and blood! My dad taught me on a stick. On purpose. I almost told DearFriend that my dad's clutch survived three kids, two of them female, just fine, and that he was being a condescending pr*ck for taking that attitude. But he was a really good friend, so I just offered to teach her myself.

 

She never took me up on it. Shame.

 

 

ha ha

 

I can't drive a stick for anything!!! NOPE! I did learn how though but I kill the crutch every time I get in the vehicle. I just can't get it though. So no sticks for me in a vehicle. Some people are just not made for a clutch. ;)

 

Holly

[EarleneW]

Yes. I would rather my kids be in a safe, reliable car. They would also have their cell phone with them at all times as well.

[Kelli in TN]

. . . (and, actually, I still think about it from time to time) when he told me that he'd never teach his wife to drive a stick (i.e., "his" car) because "she'd ruin the clutch!"

 

.

 

When we were dating and when we were newly weds Bobby had a list of things he had to teach me. HAD to teach me. He had to teach me to cook. He had to teach me to keep things organized. He had to teach me to drive a stick shift.

 

I now cook much better than him. I keep the house more organized than him and, unlike him, I can do without hollering at the kids.

 

And I could drive a stick shift if my life depended on it. But only if my life depended on it!!!!

[Amy in NH]

No.

[Kelli in TN]

I have posted twice in this thread and never really answered the original question.

 

Early on we swore we would NOT buy a car for a kid. We would buy a car that any and all teens in the house could use at our discretion. And it would not be a cool car.

 

So Robby got to driving age and Bobby went out and purchased a Topaz. Robby named it the Dopaz. Once he was pulled over because there was a report that a small white car had been stolen. The police officer looked at the car, looked at Robby and said "Nah, if you were going to steal a car you would do better than this, wouldn't you?" Another time Robby had locked his keys in his car after play practice, downtown, next to the Greyhound station, at night. Not good. So Robby was trying to break into the car and up comes a frightening, doped up woman from the Greyhound station. She decides to help Robby break into his car. We think she was hoping to catch a ride from Robby. While they are trying to break into Robby's car a guy walks up. He claims he is from an out of town construction crew and that is why he does not have a vehicle. He also starts "helping" Robby break into his car. In no time a car pulls up, a very "pimp my ride" sort of car at that. A young man jumps out and asks Robby if he needs some help. Then he opens his trunk and he has every sort of tool one could need to break into a car, or a bank safe. About this time the police show up. As soon as the police round the corner the woman from the Greyhound Station, the random construction worker and the driver of the car ALL jump in the pimped up car and speed away. Robby is left there alone with the Dopaz. The police approach him and question him, it seems someone called the police and said that someone was trying to break into the car. Robby explains and the police officer looks at Robby, looks at the car and says "Son, I believe your story. Nobody would steal that car!"

 

Robby refused to maintain that car and eventually it died in the WalMart parking lot. It was towed and we let the tow company keep it. Robby was vehicleless for months until we helped him get financing to buy his own car.

 

We ended up buying Bekah a truck when we had a little surplus insurance money after our fire.

 

My mom sold us her very well maintained Saturn for $50 when she upgraded, and that went to Sarah.

 

We still don't know what our ultimate policy is on providing vehicles to kids. I guess we will play it by ear!

[shell in SC]

See, I didn't get the oil changed quickly enough on my first car either. But my first car was the above-mentioned Escort. And when the engine started knocking, I figured out what the problem was and I never did that again. A kid needs a car he can make that kind of mistake on and live through it.

 

 

I got ya beat! I did it in two cars. The first was a Hornet (don't even remember who manufactured that anymore), the second a Dodge Dart. . .that thing was HUGE!!!!!

 

shell

[shell in SC]

Yeah, we don't really have a "Policy" since she's really not driving on her own yet. She just happened to be the right age when we downsized our vehicle so we thought we'd let her have it. I don't know what we'd have done if we hadn't kept that car.

 

shell

[Danestress]

Would you feel differently about this is the car were a junker and it were being driven to a public school? It seems to me that the problem here is in the ethics of applying for a hardship license when you don't necessarily have a hardship. But is the family wealth relevant, really?

 

It seems to me that many people here have bought their children cars. So if someone else can buy a far nicer car, really, why does it matter? To the rest of the world, our children are so stinking spoiled because they get three meals a day and have clean clothes EVERY day and their own beds even, that I'm not sure those of us who have to buy junkers can really throw stones at people who buy their kids new SUVs. It's really just the degree of utter and complete spoildness, you know? Any boy who got to finish highschool instead of dropping out to help support the family after 8th grade seemed very priviledged and "soft" to my grandfather. Maybe it's just a matter of degrees, you know?

[Mamagistra]

Assuming the money were there to provide a child with a car, I'd go with something relatively new and with the highest safety standards I could reasonably afford...

What I wouldn't do is go for the cheapest option regardless of safety features. If I didn't think I could afford a car that would be safe in an accident (whether or not my teen caused it), I'd skip the car altogether.

 

:iagree::auto:

[Kelli in TN]

Would you feel differently about this is the car were a junker and it were being driven to a public school? It seems to me that the problem here is in the ethics of applying for a hardship license when you don't necessarily have a hardship. But is the family wealth relevant, really?

 

It seems to me that many people here have bought their children cars. So if someone else can buy a far nicer car, really, why does it matter? To the rest of the world, our children are so stinking spoiled because they get three meals a day and have clean clothes EVERY day and their own beds even, that I'm not sure those of us who have to buy junkers can really throw stones at people who buy their kids new SUVs. It's really just the degree of utter and complete spoildness, you know? Any boy who got to finish highschool instead of dropping out to help support the family after 8th grade seemed very priviledged and "soft" to my grandfather. Maybe it's just a matter of degrees, you know?

 

It is the issue of applying for a hardship license when there is no hardship. It is the issue of putting kids under 16 behind the wheel of a car for convenience sake. I only pointed out that the ones I knew were fairly affluent.

 

But I will give another example of the misuse of a hardship license. I knew a single mom who was a waitress in my in-laws' restaurant. Her son rode the bus to and from school and it was okay. When he turned 15 he decided that he wanted to drive himself so he tried out for football, made the team, applied for and received a hardship license and then promptly quit the team. And yes, his car was a junker. It was still a misuse of the law.

[Sharon in SC]

I don't like the assumption that helping kids without strings, or not forcing them to drive beaters makes them ungrateful. ...I've never believed it's the stuff we give our kids, or a financial leg up when they need it is what has brats drinking away their college funds or cracking up their shiny new cars. It takes more than thoughtful parental support to turn a thoughtful kid into a dolt.

 

I just want to clarify that I am *not* saying that to give our children material possessions makes them ungrateful. What I am proposing is that when they have to work for some of the greater luxuries in life (like really nice cars) then they can benefit all the more from *further* character building. The fact of the matter is there are some kids who are naturally grateful and having everything handed to them on a silver platter will not negate that. There are other kids who are going to be ungrateful despite all the thoughtful parenting one can muster. Nonetheless, we as parents are still called to make the best decisions we can every step of the way, one day at a time, no matter our child's natural disposition. Personally, I just happen to believe that a greater work ethic is fostered when kids, especially in *this* generation when so much of life is ready made, are called upon to take ownership of certain responsibilities in life to include owning finer material possessions.

 

Thanks for your post. I just wanted to clarify my position in light of your opening statement.

Sharon

[mcconnellboys]

The longer it takes to put mine behind the wheel, the safer both he and the world will be..... I'm in no hurry whatsoever....

[Frankie]

Safety is of utmost importance, so we will buy a newer car with the best safety features we can afford for our son. I am adament that my son not have a junker, because of safety issues.

 

That all said, I'll probably make my son wait until he is 17 before he can drive alone -- something which I did. A year of maturity goes a long way.

 

Furthermore, we'll probably make him make car payments. Or help, at least.

 

My parents gave all four of us kids a car. I was oh, so lucky to receive their old Gremlin! Many times that old thing overheated. It just wasn't safe.

[Tabitha]

Dh refuses to buy our dc vehicles when they are of age...which isn't for a while. He'll help them buy one, but not pay for it.

 

My SIL just bought a used lease from a friend 'cuz it was a good deal, and it's for their soon to be 16 yo who is the most irresponsible child out there. My SIL and her dh have mounds of debt, and this is now their 5th vehicle sitting infront of their home...only the parents can drive, and now their dd. One car must stay parked at my inlaws since they ran out of room on their street.

 

Anyway...our children will work for things, earn them...not just handing it over to them.

 

We're not a keep up with the Joneses type of family either.

[Lolly]

She isn't newly permitted, but we will be buying her a car this summer well before she gets her license. I'm not sure what we will get her, but it will be fairly nice and possibly new. We've been looking, and the new car we are considering is just a little more than the used cars we would consider. By purchasing said car before she gets her license, we will be making sure that it has all the bugs worked out of it (if there are any), and she will have time to learn the car before she is out alone in it. Our insurance company encourages new cars for teen drivers by offering a "new car replacement" if the vehicle was purchased new within 3 years. If it is wrecked by a the teen driver, they will replace it with a new vehicle (if totaled) instead of the depreciated cost. This is at no additional cost to the policy.( Dh just brought home the brochure yesterday along with cd's for teen drivers to watch.) I'm looking forward to her having a license. It will be nice to have someone to send to the grocery store if we need milk...or cake.:001_smile: It is already nice to have someone to share the driving with on long trips. We take a lot of those.:auto: