Heather in MD Posted June 7, 2009 Share Posted June 7, 2009 DS (11) read a Star Wars book a while back that creeped him out. To his credit, he stopped reading at the scary part, and didn't finish the book. But he still can't forget what he read. To the point that some nights he really struggles to go to sleep. I've done the obvious things, talking to him about how it's fiction, it's not real, etc. I've also started pre-reading anything that looks questionable, which is a lot since he reads basically all of the time! So, does anyone have any ideas to help me out with this? I'd really like to help him get over it. The one thing I thought of last night was to check out the book again, read the scary part for myself, and then maybe re-write it as comedy and read it to him. You know, give the scary guys names like Fred Flintstone, and have them something funny..... Looking forward to hearing some ideas from all of the creative moms out here..... Thanks :) Heather in MD Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TraceyS/FL Posted June 7, 2009 Share Posted June 7, 2009 I dunno because i read The Shining about that age, and well, ya, i'm not over it yet! LOL!! Hopefully someone will have some ideas to help you out.. :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kalanamak Posted June 7, 2009 Share Posted June 7, 2009 My son is younger, but if he reads something scary, I tend to play with it verbally until he thinks it is funny. E.g. going to bed we have turned the "sleep tight, don't let the bed bugs bite" into "don't let the rotting human head with flies buzzing around it bite" (his words...I have no idea at all where this came from) is a silly singsong voice with peals of laughter following. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
katemary63 Posted June 7, 2009 Share Posted June 7, 2009 It is interesting how different kids react to the same types of things. My DD8 loves to be "scared" by books and movies. Her nightmare the other day was about going to camp and leaving me and crying. (camp is coming up in 3 weeks) Not the scary movies she watches. I really don't know exactly what I'd do if I were you except that I think your idea about reading the book yourself and changing it would be worth a try. I'd also like to know exactly what scared him. If it's something not really that scary, then maybe something else is going on...?? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Julie in CA Posted June 7, 2009 Share Posted June 7, 2009 My son is younger, but if he reads something scary, I tend to play with it verbally until he thinks it is funny. E.g. going to bed we have turned the "sleep tight, don't let the bed bugs bite" into "don't let the rotting human head with flies buzzing around it bite" (his words...I have no idea at all where this came from) is a silly singsong voice with peals of laughter following. I would probably try this. I would possibly also read the book myself, following through to see if there's a happy ending. Once they've already read the scary part, I think sometimes it's helpful for them to follow through to see the resolution. Depends on the book though. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
EKS Posted June 7, 2009 Share Posted June 7, 2009 I'm wondering if he were to read to the end of the book if there would be resolution that would help him feel better. Could you preread and see what you think? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Vida Winter Posted June 7, 2009 Share Posted June 7, 2009 I think revisiting the scary book in any way would probably just make it worse. Instead I'd start a read aloud of a funny, engaging book, especially at night just before bed. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lionfamily1999 Posted June 7, 2009 Share Posted June 7, 2009 I agree with the pps, who said you should check the ending. The book may end well and make him feel better. Otherwise, my kids have an imaginary dream book. They picture a giant book in their minds and then flip through the pages to the kind of dreams they want to have. We talk about what they're going to dream and all the great things that will happen. Granted, I only do this when we've had nightmares or they have seen/heard something really scary before bed, but it does work :) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Heather in MD Posted June 7, 2009 Author Share Posted June 7, 2009 I never read the book but seeing the movie was bad enough for me. I still can't walk out into a hotel hallway without looking first! Heather in MD I dunno because i read The Shining about that age, and well, ya, i'm not over it yet! LOL!! Hopefully someone will have some ideas to help you out.. :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Heather in MD Posted June 7, 2009 Author Share Posted June 7, 2009 Apparently there were zombies in the book, and they came in through the window. We have moved his bed away from the window. Heather in MD I'd also like to know exactly what scared him. If it's something not really that scary, then maybe something else is going on...?? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Heather in MD Posted June 7, 2009 Author Share Posted June 7, 2009 I mean, it is a Star Wars book. I had no idea there were zombies in Star Wars!! Thanks, Heather in MD I'm wondering if he were to read to the end of the book if there would be resolution that would help him feel better. Could you preread and see what you think? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PineFarmMom Posted June 7, 2009 Share Posted June 7, 2009 If you are a praying family, I would sit him down and pray through it all and ask God to take the memory from him, then I'd make a point to pray over his sleep with him every night. I'd read scripture pertaining to God being able to protect, etc. Psalm 91 would be good. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
joannqn Posted June 7, 2009 Share Posted June 7, 2009 Apparently there were zombies in the book, and they came in through the window. We have moved his bed away from the window. Heather in MD Zombies in a Star Wars book?! My DS7 likes to read the Star Wars Clones books...could you provide the book title so I can watch for it? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Heather in MD Posted June 7, 2009 Author Share Posted June 7, 2009 The book is called City of the Dead. That should have been the first clue not to read it. But it was one he picked up and had read before I knew about it. Heather in MD Zombies in a Star Wars book?! My DS7 likes to read the Star Wars Clones books...could you provide the book title so I can watch for it? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Heather in MD Posted June 7, 2009 Author Share Posted June 7, 2009 Thanks! Dh and I just discussed this last night and are going to start tonight with him. Heather in MD If you are a praying family, I would sit him down and pray through it all and ask God to take the memory from him, then I'd make a point to pray over his sleep with him every night. I'd read scripture pertaining to God being able to protect, etc. Psalm 91 would be good. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tap Posted June 7, 2009 Share Posted June 7, 2009 This one really depends on the kid. I would talk to him and find out exactly what he remembers and what part is scary to him. The description of the characters...break it down, and draw silly pictures of the characters to change the image in his head. The battle scene...turn it into a veggie tales type scene with them using pool noodles, bread sticks, licorice or another item that ds deems funny. Draw pictures or go to the store and 'play battle' with him and the item. Make sure to laugh a lot and absolutely tie in the characters words. This will help him to replace the scary scene with a new funny one. The idea of death...turn to words of your faith or beliefs. The unknown ending...finish reading the book with a supply of white out. Edit out any parts that are not very 'pg' and let him finish the book. If he says "everything"...let it go. He needs to get something else in his head. Read some funny new books and surround him in kid humor. Go to the movie if you can, to get the old images replaced by something big, bold and funny. You need to overwhelm his mind to replace those old memories. Ds has had this problem in the past with movie scenes, book scenes and imagined nightmares. These strategies have worked well for him. The key for us was figuring out the part that he was stuck on in his mind and target it directly. When he was going through this, especially about your sons age, we also would make up dreams before he went to bed. This often helped him focus his attention to something else. We would take turns adding in sentences to a story we made up. It often started with a boat, four wheeler, or dune buggy on a magical island that nothing was what it seemed. Things like, we would get sand in our face only to find out it was really brown sugar. The water was thick like jello and we could drive on top of it or dive into it. There were ejector seats in the car and if he (the driver of course) decided to eject you, you went flying up into the clouds. After that most of our stories involved me making sure to have a jet pack or parachute on before I got into the car....... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alessandra Posted June 7, 2009 Share Posted June 7, 2009 Well, the title -- and the zombies -- scares me! I have seen advice about nightmares -- go over the dream and make an ending in which the dreamer comes out victorious, or at least OK. I also like the humor advice -- in Harry Potter, students are taught to vanquish fears with silliness -- like picturing a scary spider slipping around on 8 roller skates. Good luck - it sounds like a terrible book! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AngieW in Texas Posted June 7, 2009 Share Posted June 7, 2009 Sometimes you have to finish the story to get closure on the scary part. I recommend reading it to find out what actually happens. Maybe if you tell him how it ends, it will help him past it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Maria from IN Posted June 7, 2009 Share Posted June 7, 2009 Maybe he could write the end of the story himself. Have the zombies coming through the window not be zombies after all--turn them into encyclopedia salesmen, tourists ("can you get a map of the deathstar's homes here?"), Fuller brush men, whatever. Just have him finish the story in his own way, and don't let him read the rest of the book. Make sure it's the ending he wants, and that it's a happy one. This reminds me of that phenomenon where you have a song you can't get out of your head--you replay just a couple of lines from the song all day long. Some research says that we repeat those lyrics because we can't quite remember the rest of it, that it's just on the tip of our tongues. Listening to the complete song sometimes helps resolve that dilemma--and unfortunately, may put another song there! :001_smile: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BalanceSeeker Posted June 7, 2009 Share Posted June 7, 2009 (edited) How long ago was this? I notice my dd eventually forgets about a bad memory and moves on. We always pray with her for God's peace and protection and for no bad dreams, then she comes into our room during the night for several nights, then it is basically forgotten. I think if we tried to turn it into a game or talked more about it, in our case, it would continue to keep the memory fresh in her mind. DD knows we have angels protecting us, something we pray for all the time, and if she brings up the fear, I remind her of the angels surrounding us and she is comforted. We just went through this 2 weeks ago when we went to Disney. Made the mistake of taking dd on Pirates. Oops. We paid dearly for it during the remainder of our trip and for several days after we got home. So, I can relate :grouphug: ETA: Lots of hugs, positive images (books/movies), and letting him be near you whenever he needs to in order to be comforted is what I'd recommend based on experience here. I was scared a lot as a kid, and my parents always comforted me, laid with me, never kicked me out of their room if I needed to sleep there. And, I eventually outgrew it. Edited June 7, 2009 by BalanceSeeker Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Garga Posted June 7, 2009 Share Posted June 7, 2009 This is a tough one. I was scared a LOT as a kid. An image or idea would get in my head and wouldn't leave for years. (Heck, when I'm alone at night I still picture a movie about a vampire that we watched in school in 8th grade and get the heebie jeebies--I'm 36.) My parents handled it by ignoring it. That didn't help! I just wished that they would be near me and help me out sometimes: like giving me a night light or not making me walk up to my room in the dark. It was an OLD house and had weird wiring, so I had to go to bed in the dark alone every night. I always resented that they wouldn't walk me up the steps. I was only 9. I guess they thought ignoring it would make me brave. I dunno. So, go ahead and be gentle with him and be near him when he's afraid, but at the same time, I don't think there's anything you can do to get rid of the images. And reading till the happy ending never helped me, but it's worth a shot. But only if you skip to the end so you don't run into any more scary scenes. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DawnL Posted June 7, 2009 Share Posted June 7, 2009 Apparently there were zombies in the book, and they came in through the window. We have moved his bed away from the window. Heather in MD Okay, I"m with him. Zombies freak me out, too. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Heather in MD Posted June 7, 2009 Author Share Posted June 7, 2009 Zombies and Star Wars just don't go together. We talked some more about it today, and he told me that he did read the end of the book. Apparently it was as scary as the rest of it! So I think I'm going to get it when we go to the library tomorrow, and see if I can't make a fun short story out of it somehow. The Amazon blurb says "Hoole, Zak, and Tash have come to the planet Necropolos, hoping to buy a new ship to replace the Lightrunner. Necropolos is kind of creepy--it has the biggest cemetery in the galaxy, which doesn't exactly make it much of a tourist spot." First of all, I don't even remember a Hoole, Zak or Tash in Star Wars?! But ds was going through a Star Wars phase and was reading everything the library had that had the words "Star Wars" in it! So I'm definitely changing the name of the planet, and thinking about making it have the largest used space ship dealer on the planet, instead of the largest cemetery. Kind of like Car Max for spaceships LOL! There's got to be a fun story in there somewhere! I also am trying to fill his head with some good Star Wars thoughts. We watched the and the on Youtube this evening. Lots of fun :) Thanks to all for the great advice. I knew that this was the place to ask! Heather in MD Okay, I"m with him. Zombies freak me out, too. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mcconnellboys Posted June 8, 2009 Share Posted June 8, 2009 Maybe he needs to finish it in order to see that it works out okay in the end so that he can stop being scared of what "might be".....? I don't know..... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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