We don't have a set budget, but a good estimate would be $1500/month. That equals $1886 in Seattle-dollars.

This thread gives me the chills :( I can't imagine how all of you must be feeling, and I won't insult you by trying to. I just hope he's found soon, and that everything works out just fine. Take care of yourself in the meanwhile.

I like your post, Cassy. It's exactly how I feel, and it's representative of my circle as well. I have a younger sister in college. It's not uncommon for her to use my email account to share special pictures, schedules, news, or whatnot - I have everyone's addresses, etc. whereas her contacts are typically her childhood or day-to-day friends (not the extended family or family friends). It's like me using my dad's address book for graduation announcements or wedding invitations. That's not something to read into, IMO.

That's beyond frustrating, ... hopefully it can't get any worse? Ouch.

Frustating me today ... my watch. It was a recent gift from my nephew, so I feel a bit obligated to wear it (he lives with me) but it's inexpensive so it's making me itch. It's also a stretchy metal band, and the only two hairs I have on my entire arm keep getting stuck in between the stretchy metal band parts! It was a thoughtful gift (I broke my other watch participating in an activity with him), but it's annoying as all get out. Happy for me today ... my friend has a free hotel room for tonight, but he's not going to use it so he offered it to me. He, my brothers and I are meeting up with a few other friends to have dinner at the hotel, then my girlfriend and I are have a little sleepover at the hotel :) We need some kid-free, mommy-time and this opportunity fell into our lap! We have iPads. I don't get them. I don't ever use them LOL. I use my iPhone, but if I want something bigger I'm just going to go ahead and get out the laptop :D.

Our COL is 96.3 as of 1/2011. All I could find were stats from 2005: My zip code: Average salary: $155,957 Average household income: $171,954 Median house value: $360,747 For my state overall: Average salary: $41,947 Average household income: $47,881 Median house value: $127,400

My son had to present a similar testimony to participate in a Christian co-op. He's Catholic. I've never even been Christian so I was completely lost as to what they wanted, and how to best present our situation! When I asked, they looked at me funny and prayed for me right then and there. (I was still as confused after LOL.) We asked his priest, who said explained much to me (mostly the difference in wording, and belief WRT infant baptism and solicited baptism). He suggested I let them know that my son was baptised as an infant, who continued to grow and learn about Jesus through active participation in living the faith - most notably, my son's then-participation in preparing to make First Communion. The priest said not to mention the Reconciliation part, just focus on the Catholic belief that the bread and wine transform into the body and blood, and that by preparing for that sacrament my son had come to realize Jesus as his savior. He said to try to put the Catholic beliefs into their vernacular, so they'd better understand (even if they didn't agree theologically). It worked. They let my kid in.

What a wonderful gift both families have given these children ~ the opportunity to know one another!

BTDT, bought the tee-shirt, sent the postcard. (Except your version is nicer. Mine involves a few choice words.) (((hugs))) Day is more than half-over here, and hopefully where you are, too. And we get another go at it tomorrow!

That's funny LOL. Especially the second one :D timely, too!

Agreeing that the veiled comments are the worst! It's hard when the tone reads deeper than the words. The words can be shrugged off; it's the tone and faux syrup-y sweetness that takes us off-guard, isn't it? I get a lot of them that feel like verbal pats to my head "oh, isn't she adorable with her little homeschooling thing" as though one day (when I'm their age) I'll be much wiser and less idealistic and (presumably) naive. I'm a good 10-15 years younger than the other parents in my area, so even the nice ones feel free to comment -to me- on my choices. The passive-aggressive, competitive ones become kind of fun after awhile, once you figure out how to verbally disarm them. And it's immature, sure, but so very cathartic - like a cat batting around a mouse. No intent to kill, just to play with for awhile :D At least you know it's her, not you.

It hurts to lose a loved one, and the pain doesn't dinstinguish between humans and pets (((((hugs))))) Let your loved one know that whatever else is going on in the world, she mattered so much in yours. Give yourself permission to be sad, if not for yourself than for her. I'm so, so sorry you have to say goodbye :(

How exciting ~ what a small world it can be! :)

Good luck with that :lol: I keep hearing it takes 28 days to form a new habit. I'm on my fourth round in 18 months of trying to set about a new habit. I'm about ready to decide that some of us are just creatures of habit and should be left to our routines. Let the world adjust around us :D LOL. (Read: sorry mom and dad, let the girl child be!)

I agree that her first post was worded as a vent, and that she was just getting it out and hoping for some empathy. I'll only speak for myself, but my response was more to her second post. It didn't seem like a call for empathy in the slightest. Her words suggest one thing, but her actions seem to imply another: I think many of us do empathize with being around overwhelming scents - whether floral, musky, or bodily. But I think many of us empathize MORE with being unaware of something and having it brought to our attention in a passive-aggressive manner rather than productively. Really, we've all seen people like that and once they've huffed off we laugh at their ridiculousness - we don't reflect on what we may have done to set them off :confused: it's like sending naughty kids to their rooms to "think about what they've done" LOL. (Read: pointless and delusional on our parts) Let's be real - that kind of passive-aggressive action is about us (making us feel better) than it is about educating anyone. It could be uncomfortable, but I reckon many people would want to know their aroma was too strong - whether bodily or scented. I don't think they do it purposefully. Sense of scent is like any other sense - it can become desensitized, and even lost. I'm heavy on the garlic when I cook because I've lost my taste for it and I have to keep adding more to taste it (meanwhile the rest of my family hasn't lost their taste for it, so our tolerance levels differ considerably). If I add too much garlic, it's not because I don't care about my family - it's because I instinctively tailor the dish for myself, and my own senses. If I'm made aware of other peoples' needs ahead of time, I can be pro-active. In fact, I want to be. I imagine most people do. If nobody says anything until after the fact, I'm limited in what I can do in the moment but I can make note for next time. I understand you may want/need to pass on my dish this time (or move pews), but I can't fix a problem that I don't know exists. And that I don't know it exists isn't a personal thing, so don't take it that way. Educate me. If you truly want a solution, do so in a manner that suggests so.

:tongue_smilie: Sounds like something my parents would have done. The most awesome part of parenting is coming up with creative "solutions" - it's way better on the parent side than it was on the kid side! My hair was always long, thick, and heavy. I used to get dull headaches from going to bed with wet hair, plus random strands would stick to my face and neck - ugh, I hated it! Still do. I wash my hair once a week, and rinse it once or twice beyond that - depending on the time of year. I'm a huge fan of the mid-day shower anyhow, but particularly on days that I need to wash my hair. It takes a long time to dry so by bedtime it's usually only slightly, barely-noticeably damp (if not completely dry). Is that an option? I usually sneak it in during the kids' lunch or afternoon downtime.

:grouphug: and hope, thoughts and prayers.

I like what SKL posted above. ETA: both posts, since one more was added while I typed! I get migraines from lights and smells, so I empathize ... but I also know that most people don't wake up in the morning organized and chipper enough to take time to dream up ways they can go about ruining my specific day. I certainly don't assume they have (unless, maybe, they're related to me LOL.) I do a lot of traveling for work. It's always close quarters, and since seating is assigned it's not usually an option for me to move about and find a new seat. Sometimes in the course of my work, I'm not sitting but have to serve people with strong aromas. It's not an option to skip them, the onus is on me to figure out how to make the situation work. The world doesn't exist to suit me. (Or so my mom keeps telling me, and I'm finally beginning to believe. Dang it, that would've been my preference ....!) If it were a place I attended regularly, I'd be pro-active - especially if it were a health concern, but even if it were just a generic preference without health implications. I remember vaguely, in the 90s, the issue of parfum inserts in fashion magazines. Then I don't remember hearing about it anymore ::shrug:: so the issue didn't go away, it just got pushed out of the headlines and mainstream thought. It wasn't relevant to me then, and isn't really now IMO, so out of sight equaled out of mind; it's not that I'm ignorant of the issue, it's that I'm unaware because it's not relevant to my life right now. I don't read fashion mags, and I deal with migraines as they come up. I can control some triggers, but not all, and that's life in the big city - you know? I'm not in the business of reading other people's minds, anticipating other people's needs, or purposefully ruining other people's air space ... ask my kids LOL ... but sometimes it happens. It doesn't mean I did it on purpose, and it doesn't mean I'm an idiot or selfish. It simply means I'm unaware. I may still not care in the end, but I'd appreciate the opportunity to show that I can -and will. Passive-aggressiveness does nothing to help; it doesn't even seem to have helped you (OP) process the situation. It's a valid complaint. Don't demonize it or belittle it by being the wrong kind of poster child for the cause.

Relaxing and hiding from the children? :blush: Signed, I shower til the hot water runs out!

I voted other. If I'm buying snacks, I buy water also. If I have no plans to buy a snack, I wouldn't see a problem bringing in my own water. I don't drink much during movies because water goes right through me and I don't care for soda or tea. I have bad timing, and always seem to miss the good parts, so I usually abstain during the actual movie LOL. But I carry a ridiculously large purse and it almost always has a half-consumed water bottle (or three!) so I'd probably bring it in without thinking about it. And then drink from it without really thinking about it. But I wouldn't intentionally bring in water, I don't think, if I had to pause and think about it. If it felt off, I'd err on the side of doing what felt right. But I'm also superstituous and would worry about karmic repurcussions LOL. And having taught my Catholic children about knowledge and intentionally doing wrong/sin, I'd feel guilty. And I'm not even Catholic myself LOL.

Well, I do have paid employment so my response is always yes LOL. I took several years off on maternity and parental leave, and during that time I'd always answer no. Not because I didn't work, but because I knew what they meant by the question - and what they meant was: do you have paid employment :). I consider a homemaker to be a job, worthy of writing in on an application. I see wife/husband as roles. Those roles certainly require work and can sometimes feel like a job ;), but of a very different nature I'm sure most would agree, so not worthy of writing in on an application. "Would I write it down on an application?" and "What is this person really asking?" are my gauges in answering; context matters, so I don't have a set or pat response to the question.

My daughter is six, and we're just now coming out of that tunnel you describe. Yes, it's irritating and off-putting and challenging to be around! Competitions. This we had to just address on a case-by-case thing. First I had to bite my tongue and count to ten so I didn't blow a gasket. Then, upon finding my happy place, we'd break it down like a real lesson. FWIW I do believe in winning and healthy competition. I thrive on it, myself ;). I'm not a fan of participation trophies and recognizing mediocrity, so I do get where DD is coming from. The lesson, though, is to gauge when the win is important and when the win isn't. That'll take practice and maturity; remembering so makes it easier for me to handle in the thick of things. When is the win important? Um, you're on a sports field and not walking alongside me to the car. On the soccer field it's okay to push someone aside to win the ball. On our driveway it's not okay to push me aside to win a race to the car. Especially if I don't even know we're racing until you shout it as you push me aside to beat me to the car LOL. (Just one example.) When is the win not as important? Well, when not everyone is interested or even aware that a competition/race is on. If the stakes aren't fair going into it (say, if DD6 beats DD3 at a foot race OR if I beat DD6 at a tennis game). <-- to that end, the lesson segues into one on sportsmanship. Winning feels good. Don't even try to deny her that, because it does! But the kids have to be taught to differentiate between types of wins. If I beat her at a tennis match, sure I win but it's not nearly as satisfying as if I beat Serena Williams - right? Find a way to illustrate that into something she can relate to, and know that -again- for her it'll come with practice and maturity. Also, however good a win feels, it shouldn't trump a relationship. IMO this sets the stage for downline relationships and friendships. We've all known people who will fight so hard to be right, or to get that final word in, or to rub in a win over us ... and we think: What jerks! Because they're acting like jerks. Or, if it was us, we were being a jerk. So that she wins is great, but at what cost did it come? Knocking the library books from my hand as she pushed past me to beat me to the car ... worth it? Not really. All you win, kid, is an annoyed mommy and you're smarter than that LOL. (I've said exactly that many a time!) Long answer short, you deal with it by recognizing it for what it is (and what it isn't). It isn't her intentionally being a butt. You can tell from your post that you already know that. What it is? Your opportunity to teach her the life and social skills that aren't innate, but must be taught and practiced. The bossiness will work itself out. The pecking order will change from peer group to peer group. If peers are limited or if she's assuming the same role in all of her peer groups, you address it as you did the competition above. Discussion, role-playing, real-life examples, and practice. And waiting for maturity LOL.

I was going to say any food-grade oil (grapeseed, olive) but I find them too greasy. I prefer coconut oil or kukui nut oil. The former is easier to find and easy enough to use in other applications should it be too heavy of a moisturizer for you; the latter is pricier but so very smooth and excellent for dehydrated skin. I have naturally oily skin but my job leaves the skin very dehydrated. It's a weird combination but I've used various oils for years and have found that to be the best. The only trick is that I use it at night, with spot applications (as necessary) first thing in the morning - this gives it enough time to soak in before I apply my make-up (without it causing issues with my make-up).

IIRC you spent time in Japan - right? Did you become familiar with that system of bathing/showering? Can she scrub clean before she gets in, then take a (timed) hot shower to rinse and relax? Could everyone? Signed, Someone Who Couldn't (Now that I know how you Westerners do it, I'm a huge fan of the long, hot shower) (But I'm mean enough of a mother to make that an earned privilege rather than a right!) (And it's earned upon payment of water bills or giving birth, whichever suits me at the time LOL) (:D)

I went to the Botanical Gardens this morning, with intentions to get dirty in my own garden this afternoon. Now it's raining, so I'm sitting in front of mindless trashy television and killing time online :) I imagine the power may go out at some point, so I'll take a bath by candlelight and finish reading the awful book I can't seem to get through (but can't NOT finish IYKWIM - ugh, hate that!) My kids aren't here today because they're Catholic, and are celebrating today with their parish family.