Right now she has limited mobility because of her injury. She is financially independent but lives in an apartment attached to my SIL home. I like the idea of offering to get her a financial advisor. And thanks for the links. I also think talking with a lawyer who deals with elder-care is good idea. I've found several in our area.

I may delete later, so please don't quote. My husband and his family have found themselves in a difficult position with their dear mother. I love my MIL to death. She was always a sweet example to me of how to be a content person... but things have changed inthe last 8 years or so and this year they got much worse. My MIL started going down to Costa Rica for the winter and she met a man there (G). He is much younger than her but she loved the attention. He said he wanted to be friends to "learn English" yeah right. Anyway, they keep in touch via Email. and of course, right away the sob stories started about his mother's health, or a cousin's financial problems, yada yada yada. She's been sending him money ever since. She even bought him a house! We tried talking to her and telling her he was taking advantage of her. But, she didn't care... she said she liked the attention. She stays at the house when she visits... and basically spreads the money around. We were told by other people down in CR that he was a bad apple, but she didn't see it. For a long times we've just sucked it up because we figured it's her money, and even if it makes us sad, we can't do much. She's always been a bit rebellious and stubborn. This year changed a lot. She fell just before coming back to the states and required surgery and extending her stay by 4-5weeks. My SIL went down to get her situated and worked out a deal with G and his girl friend to care for mom (gf has some nursing experience). We agreed on a *weekly* payment that was more than fair. It was MUCH more than they'd get down there and slightly less than a home PT visit here in the states. As soon as my SIL got back to the states the phone calls and emails started coming in that they need more - much more like $1000 every couple of days. Mom would call saying "the ambulance needs this money" or "we need to go buy groceries" anything. We finally put a stop to it by dragging our feet, reminding them that we had already agreed to weekly payments.. so mom started paying using her cc. It's was also pretty obvious that he is stealing right under her nose. She's admitted to us that she gets confused about money now and can't tell how many zeros are needed :scared: Now that she's back here she's still sending money to CR. She said she considers him her family now and even talked about changing her will. She's 87 and this money is for her to use to take care of herself as she ages. Is there anything we can do to stop it? She refuses to see that this is a bad situation and that she is being taken advantage of. But, does that qualify her for being mentally incompetent? Who should we talk to with to manage this mind-field? The whole thing just makes me sad. I used to look up to her but now I'm just find myself praying and hoping I don't end up like that. It's very emotionally hurtful to her children, who are doing a lot to care for her (she lives with one dd).

I think it would depend on what level their beliefs are in the every-day work environment. If they are going to be proactive toward you about their faith (ie proselytizing or expecting you to pray with them) then I'd probably be uncomfortable.

Oh no! Not fun. That happened to me last year. DD fell long-boarding home from a friends house and chipped her elbow. Glad your son is okay and hope you got some sleep after that. :grouphug:

Yes, I did know that and thought it was so cool. I love foreign films and this was such a lovely movie.

so many I already love. Cloud Atlas The Big Lebowski Groundhog Day Ushpizin Persausion (the one with Kieran Hines) Fifth Element I'll just add a few I haven't seen yet: Enchanted April Always (with Holly Hunter) Secrets & Lies Truly, Madly, Deeply Secret of Roan Innish Memento Island (Ostrov) Once Fearless Fisher King Babette's Feast Okay, I'm going to keep to 10, but there are others.

These stories are reminding me of even more times we've lost a child! So embarrassing. I really am a good and attentive parent. I will relate a classic in our family which involves my husband NOT me this time. :) He took the younger kids on a dad outing to the zoo with a friend and his twin girls. They took the metro and we live near the last stop. On the way home from the trip the dads are goofing off and talking. The subject of losing a child comes up - with a lot of cluck-clucking about said parents who forget children on trains. Then the stop suddenly comes up and everyone jumps off the train. That is except our 3yr old son. Yup dad had forgotten to get him. His sister says what she remembers is the train pulling off and her little brother at the door screaming. Then he fell over because of the train movement. They found a security guard who radioed the train and got him back and all was well - although youngest son says he still remembers the experience. Then there was the car ride home with the "Don't tell mom." conversation . Of course, you can guess what the first thing the kids told me when they excitedly walked in the door. :glare:

I never really liked his style (or much of what he said). It also came across as staged. i.e. the time the dad emailed him who had a grown son living with him.

Yes, more than one child too. It happens and it's an awful feeling. We once left our 11-12yr old at the Mcdonalds when we were on a road trip. I realized as soon as we got on the highway, and that drive to the next exit and back was probably the longest of my life. I was pregnant at the time...so very emotional. It was a terrible feeling. Left a preschooler at church once. We came in separate cars because dh came early for music ministry duty. he thought I took her home and I thought he had her. She was hiding in the bushes. Fortunately we only lived about 10min from church. She thinks it's funny now (nearly 20yrs later). Lost one son (about 3 at the time) in the neighborhood and had all the neighbors out calling for him. He was hiding in the closet...don't remember why. We *almost* called the police though. The worst was when we lost our 2 sons in the woods on a hike. The boys were probably 10 and 13. It was very remote wilderness area. We always have a rule that the older kids can go ahead on the trail, but they have to be able to see us. Of course, they didn't listen (I think they were racing or something)... We lost them for nearly 2hrs. We kept going further in - calling and yelling, asking the very few people who were walking past...no one saw them. It was getting dark too. The moment we had to turn around and go back out of the woods was probably the worst moment of my life. I still cry when I think about that moment when I had to admit they were lost, and we needed to get off the mountain and get help. I was leaving my babies in the woods and night was coming. We were back at the van, my dh was gathering equipment to sleep by the trail and I was packing the other kids in the car to go to the ranger station when they walked out of the woods with a "where have you guys been?" look on their face. O my God, was I so relieved. I couldn't sleep that night. They were waiting for us at a crossroads playing cards, but we hadn't quite gotten that far. Thank goodness they realized it was getting dark and followed the trail back out.

how wonderful.... she's beautiful.

yup - that's what happened to me too. Thanks for the tip!

We have both and I prefer the land line for many of the same reasons Sara in AZ does. I also don't like it when people call me on my cell when I'm at home... of course, they may not realize I'm home, but I wish they'd try home first.

me too

praying :grouphug:

I'm still confused. Are you saying the smell is like the smell of your clothes when it comes out of a suitcase? Or are you saying that when you go somewhere and then take your clothes out of a suitcase they smell - and that's the only time you smell that smell..

I bet you can find some good ideas at some of the head-covering type websites aimed at those who cover for religious reasons. I have a few friends who do and some of the styles are quite attractive.

I don't understand what you mean by "when I take clothing out of a suitcase somewhere...." ???

I have no ideas but I'll give you a :grouphug:

Indeed He is Risen! "The Sting of death has been removed!"

agreeing with others. Talk with your pastor first and then perhaps anyone that you were close too. It's hard on a congregation when someone leaves and no one knows why. Edited to add: I agree, don't say "the Lord told us.." or whatever. Nothing like blaming God for it. /sarcasm off

I made a Key-lime pie. I get the recipe off the back of the lime juice bottle... but it's super easy. Sweetened condenced milk, 3 egg yolks, lime juice, and graham cracker pie crust. If I use the deep dish I double the recipe and the baking time... it all fits in just fine. serve with whipped cream... yum. edited to add: I used Nellie & Joe's Famous Key Lime juice

I agree... I agree with the OP that it doesn't seem like a good idea to start messing with major liturgical days such as Holy Thursday or Good Friday and such.

raising her hand high: Me!! I've been on Atkins or LC for the better part of 12yrs. I've fallen off the wagon, to be sure, but I feel awful and my mouth explodes with canker sores and my gut goes into fits. I find Paleo more difficult. I don't think I have a dairy intolerance and almond flour is a gut-killer for me too, so I keep with Atkins-like diet. But darn it, I want my Cheese-Its and I want them now!! :laugh: I'm going to give WW a try, mainly because I hear they're LC friendly. But, it's also because I'm so tired of eating LC (esp. the sweet stuff).

ISFJ Some of those questions were hard as I would have rather replied "sometimes". Not surprising I'm 78% scale for introvert but much lower (22-35%) for everything else. It's the same result I got about 10yrs ago when I last took the test. My introvertism (is that a word??) has lessened since I was younger. When dh and were engaged we took the test. I was off the scale introvert and he was off the scale extrovert. They warned us it would be an issue - and they were right. I think having 6 kids helped me come out of my tortoise shell.

Good grief. Hope the operation and recovery goes smoothly.