I finished The Happiness Project and I really loved it. I am starting my own happiness project as a result, and it has given me much food for thought. It is not really a "how to be happy" self help book so much as a "stunt journalism" book...she took a year to research what other people have learned that makes them happy, including saints, and apply as much as she can to her own life- and write about her experiment. It involves a lot of resolutions...such as resolutions to not criticise her husband so much, to make more friends, to be generous, to imitate spiritual people, to be present for her kids more...but she is clear that everyone's happiness project would be different and unique. She picked a different theme to work on each month, and she had a checklist to keep herslef accountable. I am having fun with it. I also read Michael Pollan's Food Rules (a short book so I am not counting it) and really recommend it if you are having trouble with wading through the masses of conflicting dietary advice out there. I have now started the Fall by Steve Taylor and I am absolutely loving it. The subtitle says: The Insanity of The Ego in Human History and the Dawning of a New Era. Absolutely fascinating account of how mankind went from being peaceful and cooperative and matriarchal, right across the planet, to being male dominated and warlike. Lots of archeological info. I love it. Can I just say that I am so loving to be on this 52/52 ride with you all because it's such a joy to have an incentive to finish a book in a week. It really made me take time this week to read with a purpose....and I mostly only focused on one book, which is very unusual for me (ok, I did download Food Rules on my Ipad and read that too, but I managed to finish both in the week!). I am normally starting a book, reading some, starting another, reading some, and only sometimes actually finishing anything. But knowing I can start another book next week gives me the peace of mind to finish the one I am on. And I can get off the computer more and just read, feeling I am actually accomplishing something, because I want to read more. OK, these things float my boat :)

Men are most welcome! We enjoy the men here- there are several. Sometimes there are some kind of female only subjects but you can usually tell from the subject line.

Well I guess thats the Great Question, isnt it? What to ditch and what to keep! How to decide. What if you need it again. I tend to do it in layers. I will go through my bookshelves and cull a layer of books i know I wont read or refer to again and that I dont value highly. I will go through my wardrobe and cull anything I didnt wear last season and am not likely to next- go through the kitchen container cupboard and throw all the containers that dont have lids anymore, or an excess of a certain type. So, thats one layer. Next time through, I might apply a different criteria. One of the criteria I have heard of and sometimes used is "if you don't love it AND/OR you haven't used it in the last year, get rid of it.". So I will go through my clothes and look at my clothes with a different eye- do I love it? Does it make me happy to wear it? Is it my style this season? Even if I wore it last season and loved it...and I ready to let it go now? Am I over that colour? Or, as for my clothes, I might decide that I only want to keep 5 pairs of jeans and 5 shirts, 5 tshirts....some sort of limit on my wardrobe, so then I have to discern what I love enough to keep. I literally got rid of 3/4 of my wardrobe a few months back...and I havent missed anything. I find it much easier to decide what to wear, and there is space in there- even though I have bought more clothes since then. In the kitchen, we had way too many pots and pans and vases. I got rid of anything that wasnt in good condition, then found a spot to put some that I dont use often, that was out of the way. The real minimalists might work from teh other way up. They might take away absolutely everything...and then add back in only the essentials. There are hundreds of peopel out there culling their possessions back to 100 or 50 personal possessions (not counting communal household stuff). So many different ways to discern what to keep. You just have to make up some criteria. If you havent decluttered before, it can be scary, but if you do it right, you really never miss what you throw away- you never even notice it is gone and never think of it again! When it comes to papers, sometimes its better to put them all in a box very neatly somewhere and come back to them at a time when you can sort through them for what you really want to keep- and then have a criteria that you will keep 5 artpieces from each year or something. Maybe practice in other areas first before you attack the really sentimental stuff. Decluttering is addictive- I get a high from it. I get a high from letting the stuff go, and from having empty space there instead. I literally get giddy from it. So I am a bit ruthless. I understand not eeryone is like that..for my dh is is so painful he cant do it. I suspect it is a personality type. When it comes to photos, some people scan them all and put them on discs. Same with CDs...I have one friend who live sin a very small space and has a large music collection- she is slowly putting it all on her computer and then backing that up. That way....with photos and music..they don't take up physical space. In answer to your question (sorry for my waffle) yes I definitely keep certain things like letters, and definitely more than what I am currently using. We have a plastic Christmas tree- it only gets used once a year. If you actually use it...ever..it might be worth keeping. Most of us have stuff we literally never use. I think the point is to start where you are comfortable. It can get addictive further along....then the feeling of letting go of a bunch of letters can be good, evne though a few months ago you woldnt have dreamed of letting them go...or excessive artwork from kids....or too much linen that is barely used.

Yes, I am understand that. I was a bit tired of the WW tracking and too much structure ....I love structure too...but then I get tired of it and rebel :) For me the No s diet seems to not really be a diet, but more of a habit forming program- I already didnt eat sweets...easy to not have 2nds....fo rme the big thing was snacks. But you know, I really love playing with my diet, so for me its a bit of a novelty. I like to play with my food :) I would try the hcg now that I have heard of it, just for the heck of it, except now I am a healthy weight and thinner than I have been for years, so I don't need to do anything radical- I just need to maintain myself and make sure I have healthy habits. I do think shaking up your diet is a good way to deal with weight loss plateaus. Seemed to work for me.

Thats fantastic Amber- so happy for you.

:lol::lol::lol: Love you Rosie.

In a way, people are looking for the truth. The western diet and/or lifestyle makes people sick- most of the things that kill us - heart disease, diabetes, cancer- can be tracked to diet and lifestyle. So its no wonder that people are looking for an answer. The problem is, too many people have answers but they also have vested interests. People who make processed and packaged food dont want you to know that eating fresh fruit and vegetables and whole grains for the bulk of your diet is what will make you healthy- not the added vitamin or mineral they put back in after stripping everything else out of their packaged food. And people writing diet books also dont want you to know the truth is very easy and simple and you don't have to cut out major food groups. I highly recommend Michael Pollan's new book called Food Rules: An Eater's Manual. ($5 on kindle- an easy read) It addresses this issue very well and very simply- and simplicity is what people need, not more complex science. As he says, you dont need to know what an anti oxidant is to eat well. We now think of food as made up of all these chemicals- vitamins, minerals, good and bad fats, carbs etc- instead of as FOOD. As he says, the science of nutrition is really only in its infancy...but our ancestors didn't have all these diseases of affluence that we have- nor do other countries. He also mentions in there the No S diet which is a way of eating that cultures such as the French, who live longer and healthier than us, naturally use- that we need to go back to. (nosdiet.com)

I was told about it on the WW message boards recently. When you plateau it helps to eat different amounts of calories each day so that your body doesnt just get used to the level of food you are eating. I was surprised that I had plateaud (sp?) for weeks , then on Christmas day I pigged out and the next day I had lost weight! However,....last week someone here mentioned the No S diet on a WW thread and I decided I was tired of WW (and I havent really picked up tracking propoints since I lost track over Christmas, although I eat well) and it really made sense to me. So, I am doing it and I lost 1/2 kg in a few days. Not calorie counting, just common sense and easy peasy. No snacks, No seconds, no sweets, except on S days (saturday and sunday). Heck, one week isnt much to go on but i like new things :) nosdiet.com

I noticed. I breathed deeply a few times and went a read my new book for 52/52. Then I felt connected to you all :)

My kids would have loved school- I had to work hard to keep them happy enough at home- and they were happy. As their parent I felt it was in their best interest to be at home, but had I at any stage said they had to go to school, they owuld have been fine. And evnetually that is what has hpapened with ds- he is going to school, and he is fine with it. We will see how it turns out. I too hated school, although I loved learning. I dont think most kids love the school part- they love the social part. But I could be wrong. Amd maybe home isnt so fun for many kids?

I don't understand how everyone is supposed to be top of the class, and everyone is supposed to get As. How does that actually work in China- because As are fairly meaningless when everyone gets them, surely? And someone has to be bottom of the class- if its all graded? I did find the article interesting and food for thought. I wonder how my son would have done if I had pushed him that hard- he has low self steem around his ability to do school - but I dont think I could have done it. He is going to have to find that motivation in himself when he goes to school, although I will be encouraging him. I find it over the top, but I also find it interesting to see her perspective- I hadnt really heard it first hand before, I had only guessed. Its worse than I thought in one sense, but its too easy to judge. There are how many peopel in China? And India etc? These parents are doing whatever they can to give their child the edge that might give them a half decent life. If you can call it that. But poverty is not glamorous, and that is the culture's background- especially compared to us. I do value the creativity and self expression part of our western culture though- much more than I value that type of so-called sterotypical academic success. I mean, it is nice to have both, but I think I know which way I would rather fall given the choice.

Right now, I would probably just put it away for emergencies, and consider it part payment toward the Mac computer I intend on buying when we are more financially solvent.

I am knitting a cardigan- I have only knitted socks for years. Before that it was fingerless mittens for years. I want to learn to knit with circular needles next.

I have been reading the book The Happiness Project and I think it has some great ideas in it for how to bring balance and happiness into our lives. She definitely goes into her anger issues and her treatment of her husband and 2 girls and how she spent time realyl focusing on changing her behaviour. I am sort of coming to the conclusion that if one wants to change a behaviour one needs to simply do it. In this book, she talks about having a chart for the behaviours she wants to encourge or change in herself, and she ticks them off each day when she succeeds. I am goign to try it (she will send you her chart if you like- go to the Happiness Project blog). It has made me realise how much I tend to wallow in my negativity instead of just letting go and behaving well in spite of not feeling great. She talks about how acting like we want to feel can actually really help us feel like it. I realise how much I tend to put my unhappiness onto the people around me- talk about it, even expect them to listen- and how much that really doesnt help most of the time, although I am not giving myself a hard time here- just noticing. I tihnk we just need to be gentle with ourselves when we behave in ways we dont like, apologise, and then go back to doing our best.

As a child I learned basic sewing and embroidery at school, and knitting from my mum. I loved to cook but was not realyl encouraged much- I did learn some good skills at home ec though. My dad also taught me and encouraged me to garden. As an adult I have continued to knit, taught myself sewing machine and further sewing skills (but still only basic) and I havent done much embroidery at all, yet I feel comptetent I could if I wanted to. I enjoyed it as a child. I have continued a love of cooking and a love of gardening. As an adult I have also done pottery, learned to draw and paint, have learned herbalism and healing techniques/ natural medicine, and learned many other skills over the years such as spinning.

Happy Birthday Rosie! SO glad you are here.

I was not raised Catholic, but my dh was. We are very clear and conscious of the syndrome of Catholic guilt. It is hard to describe though, because it is all permeating rather than very specific. The guilt goes very deep and covers all parts of life. We discuss it sometimes. Dh calls Catholicism one of the darkest cults on the planet , because it involves a set of beliefs you take on (usually from birth), its virtually impossible to leave (dh did but other Catholics still see him as Catholic and frequently try and get him to reclaim his faith again), and basically the beliefs include the fact that everyone who isnt Catholic will burn in Hell when they die, to put it bluntly, so you better be on "our team" because the alternative are the losers. That's pretty dark, if you ask me. Not all Catholics believe that (and many other faiths also believe it)...we have a Franciscan monk friend who is far more openminded about other faiths, and non dogmatic about his own, than most- in fact, it gets him into trouble. But I think he is the exception, and most dont even like to think about the implications of what they are believing.

Well...we are on an American based message board and try and be on our best behaviour. :lol::lol::lol: As others have said..the conditioning is soooo strong in America that they are the greatest country in the world. You can just imagine what the rest of the world thinks of that. Its just a belief Americans are taught. And thats not to diminish their contribution and the great things about America and Americans...but, really. We love you anyway.

Me- in that I never took on the belief systems of Christianity because they just didnt make sense, despite being exposed to them strongly at school. I recognised from a young age that religions involved belief, and that they all involved different beliefs, and that while they were all trying to find the truth, truth and belief are pretty much mutually exclusive, because truth is truth no matter what you believe, wheras a belief will stand in for truth. However i do not equate non belief in religions with there being no such thing as what tends to be called the "supernatural". I see the supernatural as a certina way of perceiving, and current scientific based thinking, as well as religious beliefs, tend to block seeing magically- which is really seeing clearly. I am talking from the perspective of someone who has experimented with hallucinagenic substances used in traditional cultures in her younger years, and I do not think our generally narrow range of perception is by any means all there is....and some people naturally perceive things others cant, such as energies, auras, dead people etc. But to me that is a world apart from religious beliefs, which I never really took on.

I think its always best to not have expectations about such things, and to let go of the gift once given. If they send thankyou notes, then it is all well considered. If they dont, and you never hear anything ever again...well, what to do. Hard on kids who love to give presents, but really, its best not to have expectations, then you wont get offended. I have noticed it is more of a trend nowadays to not open presents at the party and I think it is often done for well considered reasons. Gifts are often not opened with much grace anyway when there are people busy arriving. Depends on the child and the parent supervising. Not something worth getting upset about. Give and let go.

Green Smoothies. Palak Paneer. Chinese stir fry. Sesame Spinach Salad (its addictive) 2 tbs oil 1tbs soy sauce 2 tbs wine vinegar 1 clover garlic, crushed Pinch sugar ¼ tsp nutmeg Freshly ground black pepper 1 tsp grated fresh ginger 250gms young fresh spinach 2 tbs toasted sesame seeds 1. Mix together in a jar: oil, soy sauce, vinegar, garlic, sugar, nutmeg, pepper and ginger. Cover, shake well, put in fridge till needed. (I put it all in a blender but its not necessary). Wash and dry thoroughly the spinach and tear into smallish pieces (I don’t if I have baby spinach) . Place in salad bowl and pour on the dressing, then sprinkle on the sesame seeds. Toss lightly. Serve fair

If I owned our house (that'd be nice- its worth a lot, but we don't) I would plant lots of fruit trees and extend the vegie garden. We would install a salt water system for the pool and get a pool cover. In the house, most things are great, but I would probably paint some things and get new carpets, or rugs. I would also get evaporative air con instead of the refrigerated one we have now. I love having open windows and doors and the weather here is suited for it. As it is...the best thing I can do is unclutter, and keep uncluttering. Its a beautiful big old house with marble floors and bathrooms, lots of space on a big block. I am blessed, I love my bedroom and my office, and everyone has their own space. We were grateful to be told recently our lease would be extended..we love it here.

I guess I am not very hospitable. We odnt hav e alto of guests although I guess I should count the vegetarian lunch I make twice a week for about a dozen people, guests. I am possessive of my kitchen, and the food therin. Even the kids dont get free rein. I do like to entertain.... and I think I used to be different from how I am now. I used to be more easy going. I am noticing that I am getting less tolerant as I am getting older...or perhaps I jsut have healthier boundaries and know what I want, nowadays, and am less concerned about whether people like me or not for it.

Since you are 50, you could put it down to pretty normal menopausal variations. You could try progesterone cream though- I have searched high and low and not found any evidence of harm from using it, particularly short term. A few months or so. But, its pretty normal for women to get irregularities as they go through menopause, even if they have been regular all along. You coudl also try some sort of herbal supplement to help ease you through the next couple of years.

Potential