She doesn't need to hear about your fears or concerns for her. Talk with understanding friends or a therapist about those. There is probably a PFLAG in your area, even in deep red areas, and they have a lot of resources for you. She needs your love and support and to sense from you that it's going to be okay. If you want to talk with her more about it, you could ask her what it means to her to be bi and then just listen and thank her for sharing her thoughts, even if they seem naive or uninformed to you. You could tell her you're glad she trusts you enough to tell you and that you always have her back. You can change your language to refer to future partners versus boyfriends or husbands (showing you heard that she is bi and accept that her future interests could be male or female.) But mostly I'd let her bring it up if she wants to and see how it all plays out over time.

I still remember an ill fated trip when I drove my sister's kitten for five hours (for a reason I can't remember now). The car sick kitten got out of its box in the back seat, perched on the headrest behind my head while I was driving, and drooled on my head while crying. We were both pathetic when we finally arrived.

We have a Sienna that has a few good years left. Kids are either on their own or almost so it's basically just dh and me. We plan on replacing it with a hybrid Sienna, maybe when dh retires in a couple of years and hopefully prices are more reasonable. We thought about a truck, but really we haven't encountered a time yet where we couldn't fit what we needed for home or yard projects in the van, and the van is better for outfitting for camping which we plan to do, plus better mileage. We already have a Prius and hope to not get anything that isn't at least a hybrid from here on.

I'm very picky about my landscaping and dh knows that is my domain. If he had started something without me and I didn't like it, I'd thank him for trying but tell him it isn't really what I was thinking about and he'd offer to start over without me needing to insist. It would bother me looking out and seeing something that isn't what I wanted because my yard brings me visual pleasure and I look out at it a lot during the day for that pleasure. Having said that though, I have a trunk that serves as our coffee table in the family room. I worked to design exactly what I wanted and dh built it. He showed it to me several times as he was making it, and I signed off, but I didn't catch that he had the grain of the wood vertical on the end pieces and horizontal on the side pieces until it was fully built. I never had the heart to ask him to redo it so that the grain was horizontal everywhere, and every time I look at it I remind myself that it's a fitting symbol of marriage - it's imperfect but beautiful and made with love. So I guess I'd weigh just how much it would bug me to keep looking at it and decide from there. For something that prominent though, I wouldn't let it slide.

What ifs can be a heavy burden when dealing with a kid with mental illness. Believe me, I know. I also happen to hold a couple of advanced degrees in clinical psych, so my knowledge of the what ifs makes it that much harder. Here's my advice FWIW. Go with the evidence in front of you with your particular kid and focus on what is working now. We can't predict the future and can't control what might happen. Gathering info on possible things that might help now is good, but if they don't help right now, they don't, and that's fine. They are an option to try again later in the future if the need arises. I know that helpless feeling when you just want your kid to get better. You'd do anything, I know, and the thought of a lifelong mental illness that impacts their life is terrifying. But I've found the best way to cope is inform yourself, yes, but every kid is different, every illness is different, every path the illness follows is different, and we just don't know what the future holds. If something isn't helping right now, it's perfectly okay to stop trying that particular thing. Maybe it will help later, maybe not, but later isn't here. The same is true for medication. Maybe she'll need it long term, maybe not, and trying to peer into her future and predict it isn't great for anyone. She is getting benefit from it now, and that's great. You guys have found something helpful for now which is huge. Focus what works now and what doesn't work now and adjust as her future unfolds.

My youngest took Lexapro for about three years after trying Prozac with bad results. They had bad dreams on it. FWIW, they wish they had gone off it after about six months. They had much more energy and more sense of being present in life after stopping it and they regret the years spent in an exhausted haze. As a parent looking on I know their depression and anxiety also looked like an exhausted haze, so how much was medication and how much was mental illness, I don't know, but there is no denying how much better they are doing off Lexapro now.

We came into the US from Mexico years ago and I declared the cans of soup we bought in Mexico and hadn't opened yet because you declare all food, right? The customs person told me it was canned so no problem. Fast forward a few years and again we are entering the US from Mexico. We had one can of soup in our luggage that I didn't declare because canned. The customs agent had a fit and my husband was glaring at me like I was trying to smuggle drugs. Just can't win.

I agree that we seem to not really know how much protein we really need, though I've read that with the US diet, we probably get too much. I don't know how to tell if you are getting enough or not. I am not totally plant based but am a life long vegetarian and we've shifted to almost all minimal processed plant based eating at home. I do wonder about the protein sometimes because I don't eat higher sources at every meal, but I figure as long as I feel good (which I do) and as long as I'm eating very little processed food and almost all whole foods, I'm probably okay. Don't know for sure though. I think a key is little processed food because one can be vegan and still eat lots of junk which would displace protein heavy foods. If I was trying to bulk up or trying for athletic feats, I'd consider adding in eggs again, though I know there are vegan athletes. I can't choke down meat or fish.

We have had a WF for about five years now. My admittedly little experience with them has been constant disappointment. I need a weird ingredient and think, "Oh, I bet WF would have it, " and they don't. When I'm there (which is rare), I see something that sounds like it would be good, so I get it, and it's not. Not awful, just not great enough to get more either. That is especially true of their prepared foods. Prices are high and I'm just not impressed enough with anything I've gotten. We do have a TJs and I love it. ETA we have a high end local grocery that competes with them and does a better job in almost every way IMO. So that grocery is my first go to for WF type stuff.

I can be ticked at the deer who make my favorite hobby difficult while still understanding it isn't their fault.

I wish everyone would take the advice given on multiple other threads to just not engage with that poster. It always derails things and never goes anywhere productive, no matter the topic. It's okay to let their postings stand ignored, no matter how out there or provocative they are.

I've often wondered as I've driven on country roads how so many rural people have these big vegetable gardens without serious fencing or even any fencing at all. In my suburban area we have rabbits, groundhogs, raccoons, deer, possum, squirrels, and all sorts of smaller rodents, all of which can easily ruin a garden and do. I found even regular fencing didn't work on the many various hungry critters - had to be electric. And yet, there they are growing corn of all things in their gardens which the raccoons would decimate in a heartbeat in my area if the deer hadn't already eaten the stalks awhile ago.

Yep. We put an electric fence around the vegetables and I'm going to have to get serious with the repellant this year on the rest. I did find when I remembered to use the repellant that it worked for about a week, even if it rained, so I'm going to try to just start spraying every week and see what happens. We have lots of deer in our suburban neighborhood and they are so discouraging when you want to garden.

I haven't given up hope on a technology breakthrough that might spare us the worst. Even if we do come up with something though, we humans, let alone animals, will still suffer a lot before any relief happens. I don't think the climate itself would cause an extinction event for humans, but I think we are at high risk of blowing ourselves up in the conflicts that arise from resource scarcity.

Me too. I just feel really sad when I think too much about it, so I try not to. We live in an area that is less likely to feel the effects but when I think about the worldwide suffering (both human and animal) that is coming, it's heartbreaking. I used to think I wasn't likely to be affected personally, and that may still be the case, but I do think wars are a likely result of resource scarcity and that may very well have direct impact on my life.

When I was about nine or so I was riding with my family on a two lane backroad in WV when we came upon a terrible two car accident. I stayed in the car, but still saw and heard some really awful things. It took over 30 min for the ambulance to arrive and the rest of my family tried to help the victims who were still alive, including kids around my age who were injured and had just lost both parents. It was tough for me to process. Right before we came upon the accident a lady who got there first and was completely freaked out flagged us down and told us about it. She said she couldn't deal and would go and get help. I remember I was proud of my family for stepping up and taking care of the victims even though it was hard on my family, unlike that lady who just left (I'm more sympathetic to her now, but back then, that's what I was thinking.) It was good for your kids to see you do what needed to be done. My family talked about it which helped and my grandparents (who were with us) stayed in touch with the remaining families and kept us up to date on how they were doing. It was traumatic, but I don't think it had a long lasting effect on my life. No PTSD or anything. I'm so sorry that happened to all of you.

The driving school my kids went through (taught by retired police) wanted kids to have some driving experience before they started with them since they took them right out on the roads. We started in a large church parking lot and then practiced in our suburban neighborhood that has wide streets. Other than that, they mostly learned how to drive from the school and just practiced with me.

I agree with those who say ignore the passive aggressive stuff. No need to counter it and certainly no need to rush to reassure her. Just act like you never heard her and let the silence speak for itself. It's understandable that your dd wants mil to like her, but the sooner she can let go of that need, the better. She has babies to protect now, and their wellbeing is more important than trying to please a difficult mil. Mil is not going to like her all the time because mil is unhealthy and that's just the way it is.

Black rat snakes tend to be pretty docile, though I'm sure their personalities vary. Awhile ago I went on a bike ride and moved both a very large black rat snake and very small garter snake off the path to keep them from getting run over. The garter snake was incensed and kept striking at my shoe which was pretty funny considering how small it was. The rat snake just ignored my prodding and finally I had to use a large stick to scoot it. It shrugged it all off but finally climbed the fence next to the trail and tolerated me hanging around staring at it for awhile.

I read NYT and WP and I read the tweets of several people, mostly journalists and attorneys. The tweets sometimes link to interesting things on other sites that I read. I never watch the news but do scan a site that covers some local news. I've learned how to temper things for my mental health pretty well now. I read headlines and ask myself, "Is this something that is going to make me feel sad or outraged?" If the answer is yes, then I decide if I'm up for feeling like that and usually the answer is no so I move on and don't read the article. I get a sense of what's going on without feeding that exhausting sense of outrage that I think I was sort of addicted to for awhile. We get the Atlantic and used to get the New Yorker but while I find the stories in both very well researched and written, they are relentlessly depressing for the most part and I'm not up for it anymore.

I was a horse obsessed kid and took years of riding lessons. I used to joke that any man I married would need to understand I wanted a horse someday. Life got in the way of me being around horses and I will almost certainly never own a horse now, but thanks for the reminder of how wonderful they are.

I think very few left leaning protestors come to protests armed. I also think the protests in Portland may have started out peaceful but the protestors themselves ended up being more violent against the police than in other areas. That isn't to excuse the behavior of the Portland police at all, but I think Portland has a deserved reputation for being more willing to engage in violent protest. As things went along, protestors did initiate violence against the police by throwing things without provocation (in particular situations anyway). But like I said, there was much fault on the police side, and without that, maybe things would not have escalated on the protestor side. And not to get too political, but I am thinking that it's not so much being heavily armed that protects protestors from police retaliation as it is sympathy to the cause of the protest. I think many police try and be professional no matter the issue, but history shows police tolerate the open carry protest of some groups/races/causes much better than others. Heavily armed BLM protests would have deteriorated much faster and in a much more ugly way, I have no doubt.

Acknowledging I'd stopped believing in a deity awhile ago and trying to still do so wasn't worth it anymore. Increasing my hiking and camping even if it meant camping by myself most of the time. Mindfulness of the good things right now versus working myself up about what might happen in the future. Putting less emotional energy and focus on my struggling young adult children and more on my relationships with my friends and dh.

I use websites that aggregate the various plans like the one PeterPan mentioned or tripinsurance.com and then I go with one that covers what I want, has good reviews, and is rated A or higher. I've never had to make a claim, but my folks have made several claims with several companies (using the same process I do) and have had no problems.

I went off caffeine and stayed off because of heartburn and reflux symptoms. I can have it occasionally, like once every two weeks, without any problems but it sets everything aflame more than that. The good thing is I really feel amazing when I do have just a little bit since I'm so sensitive to it now. I'm ready to do all the things and remember this is why people like it so much, lol. I find traveling and camping to be much easier without the addiction. I don't have to pack extra things or worry about how to get my fix when away from the house. That part is nice.