In my family, whether people are particularly close or not, we assume no ill intent and just roll with it. My mom had a cousin, Mary Ellen, who as an adult switched to Mary. After correcting people good natured-ly but repeatedly because it was ingrained, she became Just Plain Mary to the extended family who rarely saw her. She seemed fine with that. Lots of people have nicknames that are specific to one person - my mom called one of her nieces Miss Priss forever - it had suited kid as a 5 year old and it was a joke as she got older. I don't know if it's a southern thing or a family quirk, but Lulu, Buddy, and sticking lu or belle on girls names seems to occur frequently. Nobody's ever cared, as far as I can tell. One of my kids has a name that can be changed (think Bobby for Robert) and the other has a combo that is often used as an abbreviated double name (like Mary Jo for Mary Josephine). A couple of relatives use those versions even though we don't. It's fine and we take it as a sign of affection.

Posting the entirety of one student's work is kind of weird. I was envisioning a sample lab report or a single test, which is more 'whatever'. Posting the instructor's answer key would be more typical, but maybe there's a crop of students saying 'nobody would actually get that right' and this is proof that they would? But, it's still weird that there aren't multiple student's to choose from so that there's a mix. My guess is that the prof didn't have an answer key typed out (I usually don't, but I make individual corrections on each student's work) and went with something that was already online and published it. This was actually easier in the paper days - it's quick to dash off an answer key and tape it on the wall outside the lab, but it's sometimes a pain to type up something and upload it. Not a huge deal, but more cumbersome than the old-school way.

In my experience, instructors don't usually ask before sharing something, but it's usually done anonymously. it wouldn't be unusual at all for a professor to read something out loud, for instance, as an example of a 'good answer' for something short. if I posted something, i'd do it after cropping so that the name wasn't available. But, that being said, I don't know what student ID numbers can be used for so I don't know that it's actually a problem, other than the potential embarrassment of having her name posted. Our IDs were SSNs back in the day, but now that they are random school-generated numbers I don't know what they are useful, and if they are in the campus directory then it's not anything private anyway. At some schools the numbers are printed on student swipe card IDs, which anybody could look at (students tend to wear them on lanyards, or leave them on hooks at the gym while they work out, etc). Students lose or fail to pick up papers with ID numbers on them, so getting access to a paper with the info on it often isn't hard. I'm not saying that posting it was the ideal thing - like I said, I'd redact the name - but this isn't dangerous or the revelation of something secret, either. As a student, if I was even a little bit bothered I'd send a quick email asking the instructor to change it. Even if it's been seen, it probably wasn't something that other students got a screenshot of. And, on a snarky note, in my experience the level of panic that students have over a test doesn't necessarily relate in any way to the amount of useful activity (studying, looking at examples) that they put into preparing for it. It's entirely possible that they are panicked but have paid no attention to the posted help.

I originally came to discuss homeschooling, and even though those parts of the board have many fewer posts I still enjoy learning when there's something on-topic for my older kids and helping when somebody asks about something that I know. The same is true of Chat - we all run into issues, whether it's hard-to-fit jeans, weird medical problems, needing vacation advice, or navigating a family situation, and it's helpful to get the perspective of others. Sometimes people solve a problem that I didn't know that I had. 🙂 I'm even interested in some topics that show up in 'help me understand this' - style threads. I don't mind offering my opinions on anything that I've actually given thought to (which is definitely not all topics!), but I usually avoid controversial ones because I really don't like arguing and have no interest in 'defending my opinion' as a pastime. I'm incredibly live-and-let-live, so even when people are doing something completely inexplicable to me I assume that either they have different priorities or that their life experiences have shaped their understanding of how the world works to be very different from mine. So, any thread of interest where I get the feeling that I can pop in, offer a 'from my perspective' or 'based on my experience' opinion, maybe explore a bit more in a pleasant back-and-forth or help with more information if requested, and then carry on with my life, checking back in to see if anybody else has posted their own interesting experiences if I have time...those I'll post on. If I get the impression that I'm going to need to justify my answer with anything more than a casual statement, I'm out. Wording matters, and I'll usually happily respond to the curious, but not the confrontational. Life is too short to spend it arguing if one doesn't enjoy arguing! One bit of teaching advice that I got was that sometimes all you can do is plant the seed and hope that it sprouts eventually. I sort of take a variation to that approach online - I offer what little bit of help or advice that I can, and if it's helpful then it will do it's thing, and if it's a bad fit, then people are welcome to ignore it. I also know that, even within my own family, there are people who come at things from a perspective that I just can't understand. I can know, but not truly 'get it', and I usually mentally file it as 'X has a hang-up about Y' and read any interaction through that filter, as much as I am able. I'm fascinated by it, and by how it shapes different people's understanding of the world. Some days I have the bandwidth to enjoy reading about or engaging with various people's perspectives, and sometimes I don't.

Chemical engineering is known to be a challenging program of study, but the few chemical engineers that I've known have had good jobs. Electrical and computer engineering are both math-heavy, but don't have a lot of chemistry. Those can also lead to good jobs. Depending on speciality and degree level, people end up working in industry, at national labs, and at universities - I know people in all 3. There may be other options, but that's what I've got off the top of my head.

Southern Sisters mysteries by Anne George Deborah Knott mysteries by Margaret Maron Kevin Kearney mysteries by Michael McGarrity are set in NM I don't guarantee that they are completely clean, especially the McGarrity - it's been a while since I read them - but they are more relationship and character development-based rather than just being graphic procedurals or having a 'thriller' component like Deaver or Sandford - I read those, too, but they have a different feel Victoria Thompson's Gaslight and Painted Lady mysteries are historical and feel like a lighter, American Anne Perry And, I second the TE Kinsey ones - they are entertaining, Laurie King is also a favorite, and I enjoyed Dorothy Sayers when I read them.

The term was mine. The doctor had started off recommending the vaccine and boosters to at least his older patients (I don't know any younger patients so I don't know what was recommended to them). But, this patient also has a stent and blood pressure issues putting them at risk for stroke. The cardiologist had upped them to 2 aspirin after seeing it due to likelihood of complications with the stent. But, like I said, this person has donated blood for 40 years and never had thick blood - if anything, their blood pressure is high enough that they are a 'speed donor'. They really had to work to get blood out of him that time. But, they just had Covid so at this point it doesn't matter.

One of my kids wrote at a kitchen cart as a stand-up desk until 5th grade. They also could lie on the floor or sit on an exercise ball, whatever worked. We often did spelling orally - one liked to jump on the trampoline. I also had success with letting them 'write big' - we'd use a dry erase marker on the sliding door, but a whiteboard would work fine. That let them get whole body movement while staying on task. This worked for math and spelling. We also did different things at different times. Sometimes a kid would go out and shoot baskets for 15 minutes before starting. Sometimes we took frequent breaks. Sometimes we were motivated to work hard and get it all done so that there would be more free time. Also, some kids change a lot as they grow up. They seem to go through busy stages and calmer stages. Some get more energetic, while others settle. Growth spurts can change everything, making them want to laze or giving them a lot of energy. How they handle it will change. Some kids can be motivated to focus hard for 15 minutes with a timer. Some are motivated to finish a task. Some can only do what they can do in any given moment.

I'll add one other thought, not about resumes specifically, but about job searching. When I left academia, I knew it was permanent - there is very much a mindset of 'if you were really passionate about this, you wouldn't take several years off'. I was sharing this with my dad, who was the general manager at a profitable company that was privately owned (meaning that rather than corporate HR, staffing decisions were up to him). He said that he always appreciated people who took time away from paid employment if they knew that their focus would be elsewhere. Over the years he had worked with employees as they dealt with family and health crises, so it isn't that he was uncaring about family priorities, and he knew that finances sometimes dictated that people couldn't take time off. But, he said that he thought that people with resumes with employment gaps would likely be good employees because they had chosen to foucs on one thing and now were likely to focus on work during the time when they were at work. Not all managers will be like this, but I thought I'd throw that out there - in the right hands, a resume with gaps to address family issues, whether child raising, homeschooling, or elder care, would be at worst neutral and possibly slightly positive. After watching me homeschool for 10 years, I think he'd actually find homeschooling to be a positive, but I doubt most employers have enough exposure to homeschoolers to think that way. But, I agree with what's listed above - write about what you did in a way that is descriptive without being over the top. Comparing it to tutoring, for example, is something that people understand. Having concurrent volunteer gigs shows that you can multitask and get things done. Don't rename yourself a sanitation engineer despite a long history of being able to clean up after kiddos, even if the title feels earned. 🙂

I have a teen who also doesn't want anything. Kid has organized his room and finds it stressful to get more stuff since it won't fit. It's not OCD or anything like that - it's got a cluttered teen look - but it's organized and kid just doesn't want to deal with more stuff. I'm somewhat at a loss. My other kid is excited about the idea of some food-based subscription kits, and I'm debating doing a King Arthur Flour order to buy an assortment of mixes and sprinkles and that sort of thing. Would something like that work? I have a relative who used to give me one of those Cracker Barrel kits that had pancake mix and blueberry syrup. They said that they felt weird giving the same thing every year, but we looked forward to it - it was tasty, more expensive than what I'd buy at the store so a treat, and we looked forward to using it during a snow day or slumber party every January or February. My mom used to get soup and casserole starter mixes or dip mixes from craft shows and they were great for putting a meal on the table quickly. You can buy them at specialty shops or make DIY ones in jars. If they wouldn't work for gifts, they might make good stocking stuffers. Would she like something to do with the kids - tickets to a water park or passes to a kid museum or something like that? Maybe stuck in something that would be useful for outings with a kid - bento box style lunch containers or little thermoses? I know that it depends on where you live, but when I had kids I seemed to spend a lot of time packing snacks or lunches before heading out. Now that I have big kids, I just pack more food. and we are gone for longer. 🙂

I'll just toss in...it's not obvious how to do honors, advanced, etc from the number of books read. Kids at our local high school read 2 books in English, while our standard homeschool classes read 7 (plus a poetry or short story collection). By comparison, everything that we do at co-op is honors. 🙂 I'd just rename the class so that there is no grade level and then if you need to specify somewhere, list Lantern English V.

Along the idea of Trader Joes boxes...are there food items in your area that she can eat and would like but are hard to get where she is? When we lived in the southwest, we struggled to find southern staples like Duke's mayo and Mt. Olive sweet pickle cubes. Now that we are no longer in the southwest, we have to hunt for some favorites that we developed a taste for when we lived there. So, in addition to quirky stores like Trader Joes or Whole Foods, a box of regional items might be appreciated. You can find a lot of things if you dig around on Amazon, but if you don't know that they are there, you don't know to look for them. Also, nice convenience products - soup, dip, or dessert mixes, etc - might be something that varies locally. My mom often gets things like this at craft shows, but we've also found them at small stores or in the 'local products' endcap at regional chains. And, if not food items, perhaps handmade soaps or some other item that the area is known for. Or you could go with a set of smaller things - a pair of flufffy PJs, some bubble bath, and an Amazon gift card so that she can get a new book or load one onto her kindle. Or sub a candle, or an upscale chocolate, or whatever would make be a good fit.

Pound cake holds well. I don't know about more than a week - it never lasts that long - but I often make it a couple of days before an event and it's still good for days after. My grandfather always said that it was better if it sat for a week before slicing, but I've never done that. if you do cookies, the dough could be made and kept in the fridge, or frozen in dough balls, and then baked at the last minute. I know that some people freeze cookies, but I prefer fresh cookies with frozen dough.

The different types of co-ops and homeschool groups intrigue me. Locally, we have CC where there is cost and the classes are taught by moms. We have a 3 day hybrid school model that even has a uniform policy (khakis and polos) that costs money and has paid teachers. We have a Schole group. All of those seem to be all-or-nothing, where you take what is offered for your grade. i don't fully understand them, although some are big and seem fairly popular. We also have several groups like ours, where the 'co-op' part of the co-op is that parents manage the non-teaching things- supervising breaks, watching the babies of the teachers, crowd control in the hallways, helping out as a second set of hands in little kid classes. The co-op is really a paid tutorial where people choose to take 1-7 classes. Little kid classes are entirely enrichment, middle has some enrichment and some academic, and high school has mostly well taught academic classes with some elective classes like choir, public speaking, PE, chess, and ballroom dance. Most teachers only teach in 1-2 areas - I mostly just do biology, another teacher does chemistry and physical science, another guy teaches a couple of music classes, the language teachers are native speakers who have taught their language for years, and a favorite English teacher will probably only be with us another year, since with both of her kids graduating she'll be returning to full-time writing. We have a history teacher who does great high school classes and game-based middle school history. At this point there is a rotation of classes where she teaches the same thing every 2-3 years. The classes have a grade/age range, usually 3-4 years, but older and younger kids take the classes if it seems appropriate. But, what I like is that we have a community feel but that families can use it differently depending on their time and needs. With my little kids, it was just something fun to do. With my older kid, it's been a way to get good English and foreign language and sometimes work on an elective in a fun way. Kid took a health class taught by a nurse and did ballroom dance and a music theory/history class for fine arts. We've had kids who only come for 1-2 classes, or just the morning or just the afternoon, while others take a lot and are there most of the day. In that way, it's not that different from DE. Anyway, it's definitely not for everybody, but I wanted to add it because the word 'co-op' means such different things to different people. Our large group grew from something small - a handful of families meeting so that everybody could teach what they knew, and it just kept growing. But, at this point it's more like 'a bunch of tutors gathered in one place with a schedule, and you can pick what you want'. But, we've also decided that we've reached our capacity. The hybrid school started at one place and how has 3 campuses, each with different grades. We love that our group has kids from K-12 all interacting, and we don't want to move to a facility that separates different ages and has families running all over the place.

This is a hard thing for me because the role of the syllabus has changed so much. When I was a student, it was more of a working plan, while now it seems to be seen as a contract. As an instructor, I would not be OK with making a change that is to the detriment of the students, even if that meant more inconvenience for me (such as moving a test because I felt like the students needed more time, but allowing those who now have a conflict to take it early). I don't think we necessarily want to lock instructors into a mode where they can't make changes, ever. Some classes have a set of content that must be covered, but others could sometimes get benefit in lingering over a book that is provoking good discussion and dropping other content. But, they need to find a way to work the assignments so that a poor grade doesn't become a higher percentage of the grade. A much more reasonable thing would be to change the late assignments - instead of a 2 page paper over book Y that they won't get to, have a 2 page paper over new topic in book X, in addition to the presentation that they were already scheduled to do over book X. Same point distribution, but different assignment. When talking with administration, that's the bigger complaint. It can be less productive to have a 'They shouldn't be able to change anything' approach since many deans can probably imagine a time when there is actually a reason to change plans mid-semester..but not in a way that causes most of the students to do more poorly than they would have otherwise. I've also seen students complain about changes that didn't need to affect them. I have work due on Fridays every week, but one week at the request of a couple of students who had been sick I allowed the class 2 extra days, with the work being due on Sunday. I got a lot of complaints about having to work on the weekend from students who had not been sick, even though there was nothing stopping them from turning it in on Friday like they usually do. As I told them, I'll never do this again, but, but there was nothing requiring you to wait until the day before something is due to do the work. The assignment has been posted, and you've known all of the information to do it, for 3 weeks. It was bizarre, really - the students who had been sick were happy for the extra time (I would have given it anyway, but the blanket 'you have 3 extra days to do everything' was easier than them needing to contact me individually), some students turned everything in according to the usual schedule so that their weekend would be free like it usually was, and some others apparently saved everything until the weekend and then got mad.

You can test for some of them. i don't know how much some of the levels fluctuate so I don't know whether there are good tests for steady-state Mg and Zn levels, but i know that B, D, and Omega3 levels can be tested for. But, there isn't much contraindication for these supplements for most people even if they aren't strictly necessary. If she has a spouse who is resistant to seeking medical help for these issues, adding a vitamin supplement might be an easy fix. And, the other complication with some of these is that they actually can't tell you what level a particular patient needs. With vitamin D, a relative recently got back bloodwork that said that their levels were within the safe range, between 300-800 (I think - I don't remember the specifics). But, there was a note, that said that 10% of people had neuropsychological effects with levels under 400; relative had a level of 350. Similar things are true of other things like hormone levels or medicine levels in the bloodstream. There are many medical situations where the only way to figure out whether a treatment helps, or what the ideal dose is for a particular patient, is to try it and see what works.

Spouse travels for work frequently. It only takes about 15 minutes for him to pack for a week long work trip because he does it so often. He knows where everything fits into the suitcase, which bag to take, how to pack so that he only needs the dress shoes that he's wearing, etc. On the other hand, when we go on vacation, it takes him much longer. We have to count - how many 'go out to dinner' outfits, how many swimsuits, how many shoes - sandals, tennis shoes, what else?, etc. For that type of trip, he actually takes longer than I do since I do 'take the kids to a water park' type outings more often and can quickly lay my hands on all of that gear. I'm much, much, more of a list maker than he is, but there is also value in repetition.

People vary - some don't like practical or future gifts, but I always loved them - I like feeling prepared and this was almost like stocking a hope chest. My older is a junior, but I've started thinking about what kid will need. Something to eat off of - we tend towards corelle because it's easy to wash (doesn't get damaged by grease like plastic can), microwave-safe, and thin so it's space efficient. A small set of forks, spoons, etc. Kid wants a blender of some sort for smoothies. My planned graduation gift for each kid is a a quilt from here https://www.tshirtquilts.com/ I got one for spouse years ago, made from a bunch of our college Ts, and it is a favorite gift. It's pricey, but I've been saving shirts for years and think it would be a cool keepsake and it can be used. Whatever you think that student is likely to use for hauling stuff back and forth, doing laundry, or storing stuff in - plastic milk crates, rubbermaid tubs, or giant ikea bags - you might choose to put some gifts in them and let them be the box/gift bag. None of those are terribly expensive, but when you have to buy a lot of them they can add up so it might help to start getting them early.

We've looked at some that my teen girl was interested in - one with international snacks, one with seasonings and recipes to cook meals from various countries, and one that was British baking show themed. I've also debated ordering some fun mixes and decorating supplies from the King Arthur Flour company so that she can try out scones, muffins, donuts, or waffle flavors that might seem fun. I usually do everything from scratch, but when kid has a friend visit or spending the night they sometimes like to try out a new snack.

We rarely skip the verses printed in the hymnal (Methodist) although if there are extra verses written as a numbered 'paragraph' at the end we may not sing them all. That's fairly rare, though. Most have 3-5 verses, although occasionally there will be 6-7. Our music director does a fantastic job of choosing topical hymns.

Somewhere I saw a recommendation for an old book (it's been reissued so it's not some hard-to-find used book) called 'Calculus made easy'. Knowing that kid was going to do AoPS and try for the Calc BC AP exam, I wanted something that would simply and clearly explain the material. I sometimes feel that AoPS gets so into the weeds that kids can miss some things...anyway, kid has found it to be helpful.

One of my kids does great with self-directed learning. Kid has done AoPS for years, currently on calculus. We've typically added supplemental material, which kid finds helpful for clarifying some concepts. Usually, kid works, and I check it orally - kid calls out answers. If something is missed, I ask questions to help it get sorted out. We've also done AP Chem. It was mostly self-study, but I found a syllabus to help follow, we did labs together and I coached lab reports, and I checked work using the same method as for math. My younger child would not be successful with this method. Kid is currently taking outsourced Algebra and Physical Science, even though both of those are well within my capabilities and I already had books to use. But, there is conflict when I teach this kid directly, and kid doesn't have the patience and frustration tolerance to self-teach. So, we do what works academically while trying to work on 'ability to work with a parent productively' and 'increase frustration tolerance' using something other than school.

I think it depends on family routines. As a teen, my parents probably would have been OK with a friend coming by, but for most of us, boyfriend/girlfriend visits were limited to weekends and 1 weeknight because parents didn't want things to be..too serious? too distracting from school? I mean, couples saw each other at school and ball games or band practice, but didn't hang out at houses daily during the week. I hung out with a group of band kids who came over every Friday after the football game. On Saturday, we went to one of 2 houses, one of which was mine, or sometimes bowling. We'd check with the parents to make sure they were up to having us over, but as long as it followed the routine it was usually fine. So, I can see there being family/friend routines that mostly just happen every week. I can also see kids having an 'always around' best friend or SO that is basically family and not checking about that. It wasn't my situation, or my kids, but I could imagine that it could be. But, most of the time checking in would be closer to what I'd expect. Spouse and I would do the same, though - Do we have plans tonight? Is it a problem if Sally comes over? or Any reason why Jesse shouldn't come by tonight? It's easy to forget about having to go to the band concert, or that I'm using our usual take-out order, etc. I mean, it wouldn't be usual for it to be a problem. But, my kid with a car usually says 'I'm headed to ball practice now' even though it's the same time every day, so it would be something more like that. They also ask about food, mostly because they don't want to accidentally eat an ingredient. I think they live in fear that they'll eat something as a snack and miss out on a favorite food that I was going to make because I no longer have everything that the recipe calls for! They don't usually ask about something that's been opened or something like an apple or grapes, other than to ask when the next meal is so that they know whether to eat or wait,

Oh, my, yes! That's why so many of the baseball kids are in so many useless APs. College instructor friend reports that kids come to college with tons of APs and think that they'll graduate quickly. They are shocked to find that most are useless, counting only as electives. Non-calc physics doesn't count for engineers. Getting 5s on both English tests is worth the same 6 credits (2 courses) that getting a 5 on one of them is. AP Human Geography and AP Spanish likely fill the same humanities elective credit, so you don't need both. They may be worthwhile in their own right, or not, but they won't necessarily help you graduate more quickly. In some schools these classes come with excessive workloads. There is no reason that kids shouldn't be able to take an 'advanced chemistry' class and have it be a good, solid high school class. Or, stated another way, do we really believe that high schools are full of kids who are prepared to do college work in 9th grade? And if so, why don't we just send them to college? I'm sure that there are a few, but...I've hung out with the baseball team a bit...I don't think that 1/4 of them were ready for college material in 9th grade, but they were in AP Human Geography. It's entirely possible that my kid will graduate with fewer AP classes, but more useful college credits earned, than most of his teammates. Tha'ts crazy!

We play on a public school ball team, so we have a good idea of what my older would be taking if he went to public school. The ability to take classes that are either useful or interesting is big. Kid would have taken AP Human Geography in 9th - that's what all of the smart kids are scheduled for. For the 3 social science requirements that we've done/are doing in 9t-11th, we chose either interest-based or co-op with friends, which also happened to be rigorous enough for kid to get a 5 on AP US History, fulfilling a big social science requirement at a couple of kid's preferred colleges. The ability to choose classes that are either interesting, box-checking, or specifically useful for the future is great. We aren't dumping massive amounts of time on busywork for useless classes. I remember my SIL playing the the video game Plants vs Zombies because her kid had to get to a particular level as part of a high school biology class and the family was taking turns playing the game because it served no educational purpose. Really? Being able to do more extracurriculars. Kid does Science Olympiad and is on the quiz bowl team, which is usually mostly the same kids since their seasons are offset, plays baseball, and is working towards being an Eagle Scout. There is no way that kid could manage all of that plus a challenging courseload in school. When we went to Science Olympiad nationals one year, we learned that most kids there have to commit to doing no other extracurriculars in order to be on their team and accommodate their practice schedule. We don't make it to nationals on a regular basis, but when we do it's with a team of kids that also do sports or have jobs or do other normal teen things. Being able to take classes (DIY or outsourced) that specifically explore possible career paths. Kid likes working in the garden so I wondered about a possible career in something agricultural. I designed a horticulture class and kid decided that ag was a great hobby but not a job. Spouse designed a computer engineering survey and kid thought thinks that that's a better fit and enjoyable. I've known other kids to find CC classes that helped them choose a career direction. I think my younger may find more benefit from working - kid debates between things like early childhood education and something like occupational therapy (either as a therapist or an assistent). Some of the local childcare places will hire older homeschool teens to work part-time and our martial arts school hires some teen instructors. Either would provide a good chance to see if working with little kids in big groups is actually a good job fit. And kid can choose DE courses related to either field to do more exploration. Being able to spend more time together. With very active teens, I've come to treasure the time I spend in the car with them, and the time that I spend because moms help coach or organize or facilitate most homeschool activities. I have spent so many Fridays at practice and Saturdays at competitions for Science Olympiad, driving kids, finding food, interacting with the kids and their parents. It's a lot of fun, even if exhausting. Our lead coaches are awesome, parents of kids who graduated years ago, so clearly I'm not the only one who feels this way. The fact that I keep learning things. Kid does so much independent learning at this point, but is always coming to tell me things. And, many of the kids have a kind of...confidence? purpose? self-directedness? that is fun to watch. They can be loud and goofy and all of the sometimes annoying things that teens do, but with much less peer pressure they seem more self-assured - they do what they do, and so do their friends, and it doesn't have to be the same. Our co-op has a group of juniors who are some of my favorite people - many will mostly DE next year, and at any rate they'll soon graduate and I will genuinely miss all of them, not just my own kid, when they head to college.