Mamabyrd Posted February 19, 2009 Share Posted February 19, 2009 My dd is currently in 5th grade. She has home schooled from the beginning, witht the exception of a one year stint in public school last year. My husband wanted her to try it. It was a good year but we were disappointed with the over emphasis on our state's standardized testing. The 4th graders last year did not read one book in school last year, not one! All they did was practice for that test. So, we are back to home schooling. Here is my problem. My dd really wants to learn to play the cello. There are no private teachers locally, I've tried. The closest teacher I've found is located an hour away and that is just not going to work with my already busy schedule. So, for my dd to learn cello she would have to enroll in public school for middle school next year. The school has an excellent strings program and because my dd would be eligible for pre-Advanced Placement classes in middle school, some of my academic concerns would be alleviated a little. My dd is bright, kind and mature in some ways. She is "young" in other ways, however. She still loves playing with dolls and has zero interest in boys. She is very girl-y and old fashioned, prefering dresses to modern fashion (this is not something we impose upon her; my other kids dress in pants and such; this is just this child's own preference). Physically, she is nowhere near puberty and she is very, very tiny. She only weighs 53 lbs and is short. People always think she is about 2 or 3 years younger than her actual age (11). Even at our home school park day, the kids that approach her are always several grades younger; they just assume my daughter is the same age as them. I remember middle school/ Jr. High being the worst when it comes to teasing/cliques/mean girl behavior. I am afraid that I will be throwing my child to the wolves if I put her in public school. Yet, I don't want to deprive her of the opportunity to learn the cello. FWIW, my dd says she wants to continue home schooling. But if we do that, we can kiss the opportunity to learn the cello goodbye. Any advice on making this kind of decsion? Any words of wisdom or shared experiences would be greatly appreciated! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Snickerdoodle Posted February 19, 2009 Share Posted February 19, 2009 I don't have the answer for you but my opinion is that we can't do everything we want and sometimes life has disappointments. My 7yo and I had a talk about this last night when we talked about the impossibility of horseback riding lessons due to many obstacles out of my control. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Christine in FL Posted February 19, 2009 Share Posted February 19, 2009 Have you talked to your ps to find out if your dd can just take "music"? My sons are full-time homeschooled students. Yet, the middle two went to the ps for a 9 week agriculture class (so that they qualified for FFA) and the 15 year old will be taking a 9 week engineering course beginning in March. Albeit, I have been very blessed with an agreeable ps system. Maybe you can talk with the county homeschool liaison (or I spoke with the principal and the guidance counselors) to find out your options. HTH... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ferdie Posted February 19, 2009 Share Posted February 19, 2009 I wouldn't put my dd in middle school just for the music experience. I think the middle school social environment is great for some girls, but horrible for others. Any chance that one of the local hs students could teach her? We have a couple of teenage hs in our co-op that teach piano and guitar and do a great job. Maybe you can call the local high school music teacher to see if she has any recommendations. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bettyandbob Posted February 19, 2009 Share Posted February 19, 2009 Can you contact the strings teacher directly and see if he/she knows of anyone who teaches privately, that you did not discover in your search. I know school band/orchestra programs often recommend that a student take a private lesson as well so the teacher may have a contact list. Additionally, public school teachers often do private lessons or tutoring related to their subject. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sara R Posted February 19, 2009 Share Posted February 19, 2009 Is public school all-or-nothing in your state? Here we can do "dual enrollment," which is part time public school and part time home school. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Michelle in AL Posted February 19, 2009 Share Posted February 19, 2009 :iagree: with contacting the teacher and seeing if anyone teaches locally. Also, would it be possible to travel the one hour trip every other week? I do this with my dd's violin lessons for yrs. I take advantage of being in the city and run errands there that I can't here. We also doubled the lesson time to one hr every other week instead of 30 minutes every week. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Katia Posted February 19, 2009 Share Posted February 19, 2009 Can you duel enroll in your public school? That way your dd could participate in just the music classes and homeschool for the rest. Otherwise, speaking as a mother of a dd that wanted to play harp more than anything in the world......I had to decide to give up a lot of time and money so that my dd could pursue her dream of playing the harp. That meant that I had to drive over 1 hour each way, starting at once a week but then increasing to 3 times each week as she got better, needed more lessons and got into orchestra. But I can say without hesitation that all the time, money and effort was TOTALLY worth it. And another thing to think about: it is for such a short, short time. While you are driving back and forth and sitting and waiting during lessons.....it seems that it will take up the rest of your life forever! But then, they graduate and are gone......as my dd is now. I enjoy not having to drive that much in all the nasty weather, etc. , but I also miss those times of uninterrupted bonding time with my dd. As I look back, I'm so glad we had them. My dd and I are good, good friends! And I'm glad that I didn't tell my dd that I knew she thought she might like to play the harp, but that it was too expensive and simply out of our reach. Instead I researched and rearranged...and she ended up having to wait until she was 14yo before we could make it work out. (she was 6yo when she first ask us!) We made sacrifices and she is reaping the benefits as a harp performance major in college....something none of us would have ever, ever thought of or dreamed for her. I encourage you to take a long, hard look at what you could give up to help her realize her dream. It may be that she might need to put this dream on hold for a while. If it is a true desire of her heart, it won't go away. And when/if you decided to go-for-it and it doesn't work out for her and/or you, then only some time and money are lost. But OTOH, who knows where it could lead her? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Parrothead Posted February 19, 2009 Share Posted February 19, 2009 Contact the local teacher and see if he/she teaches privately. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jean in Newcastle Posted February 19, 2009 Share Posted February 19, 2009 I agree with others that playing an instrument should not trump (get it? it's a pun!) the other benefits (educational, character, even social) of staying home. If the other suggestions for finding a teacher do not work out it really isn't the end of the world. The cello can be learned another year. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jann in TX Posted February 19, 2009 Share Posted February 19, 2009 Middle dd was homeschooled from 1-4th--well we moved while she was in 4th and DH thought it would be 'best' if she attended the local PS--for 'socialization'. Well I AGREE 100% about Texas 4th grade 'teach ONLY the test' mentality! Luckily dd was in PS for only one semester. She was happily back home for 5th grade. DD wanted to play the clarinet--she WANTED to be in band. She had some other 'issues' (not relevant here) and again DH decided to put her back in PS--I actually agreed with him. She THRIVED in PS--honor's student, GREAT group of friends--sure there were a few negatives--but the POSITIVES outweighed them easily! DD stayed in PS until this year--she came home last October (10th grade). Her coming back home had NOTHING to do with the PS system--it had to do with her health issues. She misses her Band class terribly! In Texas, homeschool students cannot participate in high school sports or programs like 'Band'. My dd's former Band directors would always welcome her to practice with them--but the 'rules' say that she could not perform or 'compete' with them. PERIOD. Most districts in Texas do not allow homeschool students to attend part-time because they would not receive any 'reimbursement' from the state (it is full-time or nothing) for partial attendance. I just wanted to let you know that our experience in putting our dd in PS starting in 6th grade (middle school) was a POSITIVE one. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
phathui5 Posted February 19, 2009 Share Posted February 19, 2009 From what I remember of middle school, I wouldn't put her in public school. Other posters have had good suggestions for getting cello lessons without school. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mamabyrd Posted February 19, 2009 Author Share Posted February 19, 2009 I'm in Texas, too. The orchestra teacher for our middle school said she was willing to have my daughter in the orchestra as long as I'd agree to bring her every day. My daughter wouldn't be able to participate in UIL competitions, as they require full time public school enrollment but the teacher was will to allow my daughter to do everything else. Technically speaking, school districts in Texas can allow home schoolers to participate in individual classes or activities but is is up to the individual district and most won't . http://www.thsc.org/FAQ/default.asp#participate I emailed the principal of the middle school and he said our district won't allow it. Bummer... I pay enough in school taxes! My daughter did fine in public school last year - nice friends, handled herself well. But I just remember middle school as being the worst years of girl nonsense. My daughter is not immature in one sense - she is extremely hard working and responsible - but physically she is so tiny and young looking and she is very innocent. She will accept any decision her father and I make. I am the one who is worrying that I'm depriving her of an opportunity. Plus, we plan to put her in school for high school. I would love her to be a part of the orchestra crowd. It is a generalization, of course, but kids involved in orchestra and other such activities tend to get into less trouble at school. Not always true, of course.... And orchestra instruction begins in 6th grade in my district. As you can tell, I vacillate between my two choices: wanting the opportunity for her and wanting to keep her out of the nonsense of middle school at the same time. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Erica in PA Posted February 19, 2009 Share Posted February 19, 2009 My dd is currently in 5th grade. She has home schooled from the beginning, witht the exception of a one year stint in public school last year. My husband wanted her to try it. It was a good year but we were disappointed with the over emphasis on our state's standardized testing. The 4th graders last year did not read one book in school last year, not one! All they did was practice for that test. So, we are back to home schooling. Here is my problem. My dd really wants to learn to play the cello. There are no private teachers locally, I've tried. The closest teacher I've found is located an hour away and that is just not going to work with my already busy schedule. So, for my dd to learn cello she would have to enroll in public school for middle school next year. The school has an excellent strings program and because my dd would be eligible for pre-Advanced Placement classes in middle school, some of my academic concerns would be alleviated a little. My dd is bright, kind and mature in some ways. She is "young" in other ways, however. She still loves playing with dolls and has zero interest in boys. She is very girl-y and old fashioned, prefering dresses to modern fashion (this is not something we impose upon her; my other kids dress in pants and such; this is just this child's own preference). Physically, she is nowhere near puberty and she is very, very tiny. She only weighs 53 lbs and is short. People always think she is about 2 or 3 years younger than her actual age (11). Even at our home school park day, the kids that approach her are always several grades younger; they just assume my daughter is the same age as them. I remember middle school/ Jr. High being the worst when it comes to teasing/cliques/mean girl behavior. I am afraid that I will be throwing my child to the wolves if I put her in public school. Yet, I don't want to deprive her of the opportunity to learn the cello. FWIW, my dd says she wants to continue home schooling. But if we do that, we can kiss the opportunity to learn the cello goodbye. Any advice on making this kind of decsion? Any words of wisdom or shared experiences would be greatly appreciated! I would not consider putting my child into school solely for music instruction. It would have to be best for my child socially, emotionally, and academically. A girl like you described will often have a very hard time in a public middle school. It's the time in school that is most dominated by "mean girls," ime. It is wonderful that you have raised a sweet, innocent girl, and I would not risk losing that due to the extreme peer pressure that middle school can present. Not to say that that happens to every girl who goes to public school, but I think it's the very rare 12 year old who can go that strongly against the grain every day, and be happy with herself. Can you get involved in the public school music program as a homeschooler? Many states do allow that. If not, maybe the cello teachers there give lessons on the side, or know of another contact. If there is literally no one around who can teach her cello, then ultimately I would encourage her to try a different instrument. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dhudson Posted February 19, 2009 Share Posted February 19, 2009 Is there a Private School close that has similar instruction? I am putting my son into a Jazz Band through a local Christian Classical School nearby next yeare for 7th grade. He might also take a Logic and Apologetics class as well. I wouldn't put my son into full-time Middle school whether it's public or private. My dh was in a private Christian school and said Middle was bad for him as well. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SonshineLearner Posted February 19, 2009 Share Posted February 19, 2009 Can you not elect to only participate in the music part at the school? My oldest takes Band and a couple of other classes. Last year, my daughter did half time..... Make sure it's not a possibility. You lose some flexibility.... But...it's sometimes worth it for the rest.. Carrie:-) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Carrie12345 Posted February 19, 2009 Share Posted February 19, 2009 I would not give up homeschooling for music lessons. My 10yo takes piano lessons privately, but we consider it as much of a hobby as soccer or arts and crafts, neither of which I'd be willing to give up homeschooling for. If he wants to pursue piano seriously (which is starting to look likely) it will require driving an hour each way. I'll be willing to do that because he's shown deep interest and high ability. I can't imagine making huge lifestyle changes for something a child *thinks* they *might* enjoy. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chris in VA Posted February 19, 2009 Share Posted February 19, 2009 She has a lifetime to learn cello, realistically. I'd keep her home. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mommyof4ks Posted February 19, 2009 Share Posted February 19, 2009 Are there any private schools in your area? We have one that allows homeschooled kids to participate in some of their activities for a fee. Money talks lol. The promising high school student looking for some extra cash for a job well done is a great idea too. Are there any DVD programs for learning cello? Just a thought. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alicia64 Posted February 19, 2009 Share Posted February 19, 2009 Read Queen Bees and Wannabees and you'll have your answer. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rosy Posted February 19, 2009 Share Posted February 19, 2009 If the music program is that good I would imagine there are some high school students that would love to make $10/hr. teaching your daughter to play the cello. It's not the same as an orchestra experience, but it would be a great place to start in my opinion. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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