Can someone who actually enjoys company holiday parties tell me what there is to like

[Heidi @ Mt Hope]

Maybe it is the introvert coming out in me, but I'm having trouble getting into the right frame of night for my husband's company party this evening. In fact, I'm already feeling the torture...

 

I'm going because it is important to dh and I want to support him, but as far as I can tell, he doesn't particularly enjoy himself either.

 

Three parties ago (and our first with the company), the boss's wife told me that hardly anyone used to come to the parties and she couldn't figure out why. She said the employees worked hard and deserved the party. I didn't want to tell her I'd rather be at the dentist...

 

The party is held in a large room, not particularly attractive (Elks Lodge or something). Last year the food was very mediocre at best. I would prefer to eat the sloppy joes I made last night. We don't drink (and it's not an open bar anyway) and the 'entertainment' was a karaoke machine. And let me tell you, there was nothing entertaining about it.

 

I am going to a large effort for child care tonight and dressing up. I can't tell you the number of other places I would rather be going. A museum. A concert. The gorgeous local Italian restaurant or the renovated theater. Spending time at home with hubby and watching a movie. Out with close friends. *Anything* but the company party.

 

So, tell me. Do any of you enjoy the work parties you attend and why? I really don't want to be the wet blanket here... I need a serious attitude change. I'm going to the party either way, so I need to find something to enjoy about it!!

 

FWIW, my husband used to work for a small company and everyone there was really close. The owners had the Christmas party at their home and families were included. Their home was lovely, the food (part potluck) was always delicious, and they had a few fun activities planned. Everyone loved seeing me and the boys. We still get together with several of the people and have even attended one or two parties even though my husband no longer works there.

[tibbyl]

Can someone who actually enjoys company holiday parties tell me what there is to like

 

I'm going to my firm's party tonight. The firm does put on a rather lavish holiday party with high quality appetizers, meal, and open bar plus live music and dancing all in a very tastefully decorated ballroom.

 

I enjoy hanging out with co-workers in a relaxed, chatty atmosphere. Plus I get to meet their partners, friends, or spouses. For new employees, I try to guess which person is their date.

 

And I get the chance to mix with employees from other departments that I typically do not interact with during the workday.

 

I enjoy hearing the personal and family anecdotes that the people tell.

 

There are always one or two people who have too much drink. It's interesting to see how the intoxication affects their personality.

 

Honestly, karaoke at an Elks Lodge type place sounds like a lousy setting imo too. I'd only attend if it were necessary to be politically correct career-wise. Unfortunately, most of the time it is necessary.

Edited December 12, 2008 by tibbyl

[Nestof3]

Just chiming in that I'm glad my husband's self-employed so I never have to go to those. :) I feel the same way about high school reunions and such. Honestly, what bothers me most is the attire, but I can at least join in and say I feel for you. :)

[AuntieM]

DH has been sort of a remote manager, so it's been a long time since there was actually a company party, but I've wanted to go so I can get a first hand introduction to the people he's had to spend a lot of daily time with. Folks he likes, folks he doesn't like so much, and mostly - just being honest here - I want to check out the women. Just to know what's out there, kwim? I trust my husband implicitly. Some of the office gals... not so much :glare:

[The Governess]

Maybe you could leave the party as early as you can without looking like a party-pooper, and go get some coffee or dessert after with your hubby at cute cafe or something. At least it would give you something to look forward to!

 

I always had fun at our company parties, but that was mostly because of the open bar, great food, and the fact that they put everyone up at a nice hotel after. :D I would have a hard time finding anything to be excited about if I was going to your party, too. :001_huh: Sorry!!

[Colleen]

Think of it as fodder for a Seinfeld episode. My life is filled with such opportunities.;) Of course, there's no way on God's green earth I could tolerate the scene you describe without a Beverage of Choice, if you get my drift. Since that's not part of your routine, make your appearance, gather your Seinfeld moments to report here, and then head elsewhere for a latte with your husband.

[LaxMom]

I feel for you. We used to enjoy my company holiday party - small company, close relationship with each other, it was a nice time to catch up with the spouses, etc. We generally would just all go out for a meal, or to the theater.

 

My husband is a firefighter and some of the people he works with, I have known for more than half my life. That said, I have absolutely no desire to arrange child care, arrange wardrobe, drive an hour away, hobnob with "new" (to me) people and their girlfriends du jour, drink, and drive an hour back home. The new rule at our house is that he can and should attend holiday parties (he is also the sitting union president), but unless it is something where he actually needs to have his wife in attendance, he can bring another "date" (like the VP or treasurer or one of the shop stewards). I simply have enough on my plate, too little time, energy, and sleep, and the rubber chicken ROI is too low.

 

Oh, I'm sorry. That wasn't helpful was it? I'd go with the Seinfeld moments.:seeya:

Edited December 12, 2008 by MyCrazyHouse

[Tree House Academy]

For me, it was a night out with no kids with my dh. :) No matter where we went, it was worth it to have that time together.

[Sarah CB]

Maybe I'm just easily amused, but I *love* company parties. I get to go to two big ones this year and then a smaller party at dh's boss's house. Ours are quite different - they take place at fancy hotels, the food is fantastic and they bring out nice wine. It's a very enjoyable evening.

 

Besides the food and wine, I do enjoy meeting people dh works with and reconnecting with some of their spouses. We have quite a few dinner events throughout the year, so I know many of them well enough to be delighted to see them again and to be able to happily spend an evening with them. I really like dh's boss's wife in particular, we sometimes go for coffee together, so I look forward to seeing her at these events, too.

 

I also like dressing up. Ok, I love dressing up. And I like having an "adult" evening with dh.

 

We almost had things planned so that I could go to three company parties this year, but dd had to take my place at one of them as the little boys had a violin concert. Maybe next year :tongue_smilie:

 

So, go! Enjoy a night out with your husband and get to know some of the people he works with better.

 

And I am definitely an introvert. I'm much more comfortable in my house by myself than I am out and about. The first few events we went to were very painful for me, but they have become more fun with each passing year. It helps that dh works with some fabulous people and that they're generally interesting and fun to talk with.

[Jami]

I'm off to one tonight too, Heidi. And have NO reason to feel nervous about going. I'm not an introvert. It's for the whole family at a casual BBQ place. It's a very small company and very casual (they're gamers). And I *still* feel sort of weird about going. ;) But I'm sure it'll be more fun once I'm there, anticipation always does me in. And of course being completely round with child this year doesn't help. :tongue_smilie:

[teamturner]

I also like dressing up. Ok, I love dressing up. And I like having an "adult" evening with dh.

 

Me too!!!!

 

We went to my dh's company party last weekend and I have to say it felt a little like going to the prom for me. I can't remember the last time I got dressed up like that: I got a new dress, shoes, got my hair done, and a manicure/pedicure (which I've not done in 13 yrs, btw). Well the party itself was very nice-country club, open bar, live band, good food. My dh has only been at this company since mid October so he doesn't even know that many people. We are both outgoing people but it was pretty painful to make conversation and meet so many new people. Anyways, we still had fun even though we didn't really know anyone and I love that we got to get so dressed up and had time together!

 

I second the idea to leave as early as you can and have dessert/coffee with your dh!

[Danestress]

"Probably everyone hates this. I bet no one wants to be hear. I wonder if I can make some else's glad she came."

[readwithem]

Dh's party was last week. We spent most of the pre-dinner time talking with a couple who have just repatriated from Holland/Belgium. We spent a good deal of the time discussing this book as they had visited Leyton.

[Heidi @ Mt Hope]

Thanks for the ideas (and commiseration), ladies. In particular, I will be looking for a Seinfeld moment or two, enjoying being with dh, and trying to make someone else glad they came. :)

[Crissy]

My husband used to work full time for the company we now call our small business' biggest client.

Each year we are invited to their adult's party and our children are invited to the kid's party. We all love them both.

The food and drink is always of excellent quality, as is the music. I think the best part about it, though, is that we really like the people. It is always nice to spend time with them outside of the office, and away from anything related to football.

 

If that were not the case, and the scene were more like what you have to look forward to tonight, I would go with Colleen's advice.

 

Drink.

 

No...actually I mean her other advice. Make an appearance, and then go out for some time alone with your husband.

 

Whatever you decide to do, I hope you find a way to enjoy your evening.

[mrsdash]

I have one of these next weekend and your description makes it sound like we are going to the same party. And we don't drink, either. I believe we are the only ones who do not drink and we may be the oldest ones there as well. Anyway, I have taken some measure of comfort in Colleens advice and will keep it in mind next Saturday night.:001_smile:

[Anna]

Heidi,

 

My dh and I both tend to be introvert but he is part of management where he works. The thing with office parties is that when the management does a "no show", others either don't come or they show up and don't enjoy themselves. Even the company president shows up at our office parties and he makes a big deal out of thanking all the employees for working so hard all year and for attending the party.

 

Something to enjoy--- Try to find at least 1-2 new things about each person that your dh works with, esp those who may work under him. They will feel loved and appreciated. Keep in mind that some of them also feel the torture over being there.

 

If there are too many employees it's difficult or even impossible to host the party at someone's house. My dh's office parties are now held at a hotel with free bar (yum) and all the employees are given a free room for the night... another incentive to attend;).

[Suzanne in ABQ]

For me, about the only thing enjoyable about those parties are the door prizes. Will there be door prizes? I like the parties where EVERYONE gets a door prize. :o)

[Annie Laurie]

My husband is at his company party tonight, alone. I won't go anymore, I used to try for appearance's sake, but I really dislike going and just don't anymore. Dh himself wasn't looking forward to going but felt that he had to. They are held at very nice hotels and the food is good, I just don't enjoy the people.

[amyinva]

We have my DH's company party this Saturday, and I think what I dread most is that this is a group that drinks quite a bit, and I do not drink at all. Even when I am not pregnant. Add to that the fact that they think I am a freak for being pregnant with #6, I am having to borrow a somewhat ill-fitting dress from my 15yo DD because my baby belly is getting too big and I can't afford to buy anything right now (it is empire waisted, so at least I can get it zipped), and it is a cocktail party- ugh! However, it will bless my DH to have me there doting on him and being cheerful and bubbly with this group of people he works with every day, so it is worth every second. I'm a little bummed that they aren't doing food, though! :) Amy

[dirty ethel rackham]

Count me as one of the wierdos. I actually miss dh's company parties. It was nice to get all dressed up, meet the people I would hear him talk about each day, be around grown ups (Okay, that part can be debatable:)). There was always good food, nice wine and music, maybe a few boring speeches, but still ok. The best part was that I could dress nice for dh and know that I looked good. (No point in pulling out the spanks to wear with jeans and a sweater KWIM?) It has been at least 15 years since I have been to a nice company party. Now, they are all family-friendly picnics, which mean that I am still on the clock as a mom. I do enjoy some of his department get-togethers because he works with some great people (not for great people, but with them.) However, one of the department get-togethers was pretty interesting from a people-watching point of view.

[Colleen]

Thanks for the ideas (and commiseration), ladies. In particular, I will be looking for a Seinfeld moment or two, enjoying being with dh, and trying to make someone else glad they came. :)

 

Good job! Looking forward to hearing back from you. I had actually hoped to be at a party right now myself ~ an annual fete put on by some friends. As it turns out, childcare didn't come through and my husband took the opportunity to attend alone.

 

So I'm cleaning the house. As usual. Yee haw. Trouble is, I'm having trouble following the advice I offered you, since there's nothing particularly Seinfeldian about cleaning toilets.:001_huh:

 

But, I do hope you're having a good/amusing time at this very moment!:)

[Mommyof4ks]

I can see why you would not want to go!

 

My hubby's company puts on a fun family Christmas party each year (once they did the stuffy dressing up thing and very few people came). Tomorrow there will be an ice skating rink (should be interesting we are in TX and it will be 65 tomorrow lol), snow machine snow, and a visit with santa. The food is usually hot dogs and such, but the party is fun and the kids enjoy going. We are so thankful that hubby works for a family friendly company.

[LizzyBee]

I like having a free meal at a nice restaurant, meeting everyone's spouse or friend, chatting in a relaxed environment, and feeling appreciated in a tangible way. Nobody gets drunk at our parties. In our case, I'm the employee so I already know most of the people at the party. I asked my dh what he likes about the company party, and he said the food.

 

Sort of funny story: Last year on the way to the party at Ruth's Chris Steakhouse, we got in a wreck and my car was totalled. We were 30 miles from home, 2 blocks from the party. I thought we'd have to think of someone to call to come pick us up and take us home. Dh says no, we're still going to the party; we're within walking distance and there's a steak with my name on it. So we go to the party and I could barely eat from being upset. But one of my coworkers had an extra car she loaned us, so after the party we rode with her and her dh to their house and drove their extra car home. So it all worked out.

[Heidi @ Mt Hope]

I'm sorry you missed your party this evening, Colleen. What a disappointment to be cleaning house and parenting when you were looking forward to enjoying time with friends!

 

I decided to talk to dh on the drive (45 minutes) about the people he worked with. It gave us something to talk about other than the kids. :) When we got to the party, I put on my really cheerful, friendly face and met new people, had a few conversations, and managed to eat the food (bleh). Dinner was served pretty late, so we barely ate dinner and dessert before heading out to go get the boys. It is amazing how changing my own attitude can make things much more pleasant. :)

 

Thanks for the pep talk everyone!

 

(I should mention that dh's company also hosts a family party at a local children's museum, which we attended last weekend. (Three parties in one day. Whew!))

[Colleen]

I decided to talk to dh on the drive (45 minutes) about the people he worked with. It gave us something to talk about other than the kids. :) When we got to the party, I put on my really cheerful, friendly face and met new people, had a few conversations, and managed to eat the food (bleh). Dinner was served pretty late, so we barely ate dinner and dessert before heading out to go get the boys. It is amazing how changing my own attitude can make things much more pleasant. :)

 

Hey, now. Is that it? Put on a smile and good attitude and be cheerful and...and...and...that's all? No comparing the food to the '70s weight watchers recipe cards? No envisioning that leisure suit over there on George's father? No Festivus, fer cryin' out loud?!!!

 

Sheesh! You're a better woman than I, my dear. But we knew that.;)

[keptwoman]

I'm glad it was bearable.

 

As a fellow introvert an evening like that would be waaaaay down the bottom of the list of things I would enjoy. The poor quality food and entertainment would make attendance a real struggle.

I have mixed feelings about the ones I go to; mostly the entertainment and food etc is really good and I enjoy getting dressed up and going to do something adult with DH. It also seems to be one of the few things we get a sitter for.

However listening to people talk about (boring to me) work and look at me like I have two heads when I say I homeschool our kids...not so much fun.

[scubamama]

I guess I'm just nosy, but I want to see IRL the folks I hear about all year. DH is a computer geek at a University and I really enjoy most of the other geeks like him - they're quirky and awkward in social settings - kind of like me! The food is terrible but the level of Seinfeld material is of a high caliber when you get that many socailly awkward folks together in the same room with no "designated task".

[Happy]

Good for you for finding ways to make the evening an enjoyable one.

 

I enjoy my husband's company party. I know a few of the co-workers...at least enough to chat with. It's fun to catch up with them. Meeting others is a good thing, too. My hubby flies with lots of women. I like them to know who I am, too.

 

The parties are usually held at high end restaurants--places we'd never afford to go on our own---with an open bar. I have my glass of pre-dinner chardonnay, and a red wine with my steak. Then coffee and dessert. Lovely food makes a fine evening.

 

This year the owner decided to give a Christmas bonus instead of hosting a party. Yay! for him. Although, I'll miss the fine evening, I like cash more.

;)

 

He doesn't have to do either one. I'm appreciative when he makes the effort to do something nice for the guys and gals who make his company successful.

[Heidi @ Mt Hope]

A better woman? No. Just sadly lacking in the wit department. Sigh.

[SapphireStitch]

I kinda dread DH's work party each year, too. Several years in a row we ended up sitting with the same couple. The wife works with DH and is pleasant and interesting; the husband is a real drag and hogged the conversation. My DH gets quiet in those situations so I ended up trying to keep up a conversation with this guy who was intent on making it very difficult.

 

So last year the party was at this fabulous steak place and we really wanted to go. We got to our table and I KNEW we were going to end up with that same couple. But somehow someone shuffled them over to another area, and we were sort of camped out all alone. Which was weird. The way the tables were arranged there was no way for us to converse with anyone else. But my introverted self was pretty happy at that point.

 

Until I see DH's boss coming over looking really worried. He proceeded to tell us that the department head and his wife were coming and it looked like they'd be sitting with us...could we handle that? DH of course said "No problem, we'll be good." :001_smile: I panicked internally. :)

 

We ended up having the BEST time with them. They were wonderful, down-to-earth people, we talked about kids and education and pets and travel. I felt like I had more in common with her than with most of DH's female co-workers, and it was really great to know I was helping DH by getting along well with the Big Cheese. :)

 

This year, if we go, we'll probably be back with Mr. Downer...oh well!