Trick or treat cut-off age

[OrganicJen]

Our front porch runs the entire way across the front of our house. One year we had our porch light off (ran out of candy) and were watching tv. Multiple groups of kids came and after we didn't answer when they knocked on our door, they knocked on our WINDOWS and yelled to us. Yeah, that was super fun. At least one group of kids had a parent in the car at the street- so clearly she didn't tell them not to knock.

Wow

[HS Mom in NC]

Yes, the porch light rule has been taught here but we have so many people who move here from other places where it wasn't taught that it causes friction.  Knock or ring on a door with a porch light off here and you may get scolded. I finally started putting up a sign on the door that says out of candy when I turn my light off.

Last year we ToTed with friends in an upscale suburban neighborhood.  Not only was the whole neighborhood out in the driveways in folding chairs, there was a wine bar set up for the parents of ToTers with buffet tables of treats set up for the kids. Not our usual, but nice.

[SamanthaCarter]

Most of the teens come by later in the evening if they weren't with younger siblings. Once I want to get the kids to bed I put all the rest of the candy plus what was culled from my kids t or t bags in a big bucket on the porch. The teens are surprisingly good at taking some and leaving some for others. [emoji4]

 

 

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[Julie Smith]

The only time I saw or heard people I didn’t like was two loud women who were smoking, and talking about getting plastered later.

 

Nothing to do with age, but if you are trick or treating then don’t talk about doing things for people 18+

[scoutingmom]

 

 

There's nothing inherently unsafe about crossing a street. It IS unsafe for kids to have to walk around an idling car... or a row of 4 idling cars, with idling cars on the other side, leaving barely enough room for driving cars to squeeze in between.

 

The idea that the blame lies on the kids trick or treating is just absurd to me. It's the idlers causing the danger.

Ok forget I said anything. It wasn't what I said, but fine I'll just continue as I have so my kids can trick or treat and not miss out. You can continue to look down on me as I do what I can.

 

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[marbel]

Speaking of this, I was strictly taught that you never go to the door to trick or treat if their porch light is off, yet in recent years I see people do it all the time. Do people not teach this rule to their kids anymore? Maybe it's just in our area that they don't seem to.

 

For the last few years we haven't handed out candy. The ToTers really bothered our dog, and then after he died we just weren't into it anymore.  We turn off the porch light and the lights in the part of the house most visible from the front door.  We sit in our family room which is sort of half basement - but there is a window so the light is visible from the street.  So it's probably obvious that someone is home, but it is equally obvious that the main living part of the house, by the front door, is unoccupied.  My house is one of three models in the neighborhood, so that's also obvious to anyone who lives around here.

 

Last year some kids came up. They rang, we ignored it.  We heard an adult voice say "ring again, I'm sure someone's home!"  We kept ignoring it but it took a while before they left.  

 

The only way we could have been more unwelcoming would be to put a sign saying "go away" on the front door!

[Amber in SJ]

If teens want to come in costume and are friendly & polite they are welcome to candy.  If teens come without a costume escorting a younger kid they are also welcome to candy because I hope their poor mom or dad is getting a break somewhere.

 

Teens who are not welcome:

Ones who push & shove at the door.

Ones who who use bad language to my face even if they think they are complimenting my "F-ing lit pumpkins!" (true story)

Ones who think I didn't see them crashing through my bushes cutting across from my neighbor's yard even though there is a clearly marked sidewalk.

Groups where no one is wearing a costume; literally just jeans & a t-shirt or hoodie

Overly sexual, vulgar or awful costumes, for example do not come dressed (not dressed?) as a stripper, do not come as a giant male body part, do not come dressed as a Catholic priest with dolls simulating sex acts.  It makes my stomach turn to think anyone's child had to see you on the street.

Ones who come to my door after 9:30-ish or after my porch light is off, who ring & knock & ring and knock and so on & so on.......

 

People who come to my door with their infant asleep in the stroller get their choice of a board book from the stack I have collected from the library book sale or something from the bowl of hard candy, palmer's chocolate, candy corn & any other weird-o crap that my kids get.

 

My own kids have 24 hours to choose 10 pieces of candy & the rest gets turned over to me in exchange for something they want.  This year it might be $10 Amazon gift cards or graphic novels.

 

Amber in SJ

[Julie Smith]

If teens want to come in costume and are friendly & polite they are welcome to candy.  If teens come without a costume escorting a younger kid they are also welcome to candy because I hope their poor mom or dad is getting a break somewhere.

 

Teens who are not welcome:

Ones who push & shove at the door.

Ones who who use bad language to my face even if they think they are complimenting my "F-ing lit pumpkins!" (true story)

Ones who think I didn't see them crashing through my bushes cutting across from my neighbor's yard even though there is a clearly marked sidewalk.

Groups where no one is wearing a costume; literally just jeans & a t-shirt or hoodie

Overly sexual, vulgar or awful costumes, for example do not come dressed (not dressed?) as a stripper, do not come as a giant male body part, do not come dressed as a Catholic priest with dolls simulating sex acts.  It makes my stomach turn to think anyone's child had to see you on the street.

Ones who come to my door after 9:30-ish or after my porch light is off, who ring & knock & ring and knock and so on & so on.......

 

People who come to my door with their infant asleep in the stroller get their choice of a board book from the stack I have collected from the library book sale or something from the bowl of hard candy, palmer's chocolate, candy corn & any other weird-o crap that my kids get.

 

My own kids have 24 hours to choose 10 pieces of candy & the rest gets turned over to me in exchange for something they want.  This year it might be $10 Amazon gift cards or graphic novels.

 

Amber in SJ

When I was little I wanted my mom to make me a costume of a pink elephant. From the movie Fantasia. Welll, ..... it turns out I looked more like male genitalia. I supposedly was constantly asked in a shocked voice, “What are you?!?!â€

[OrganicJen]

When I was little I wanted my mom to make me a costume of a pink elephant. From the movie Fantasia. Welll, ..... it turns out I looked more like male genitalia. I supposedly was constantly asked in a shocked voice, “What are you?!?!â€

Hahaha

[abacus2]

I used to think I would make my kids stop at 7th grade, but my oldest loves it so much I am letting her continue even though she is 8th grade this year. She plans her costume way in advance. My kids ranking of holidays: #1 Christmas 2# Halloween.

[Ravin]

I have been known to withhold candy if they haven't dressed up. Kids in costume any age are great at Halloween.

[dirty ethel rackham]

Not past 95 yrs old. Well, unless someone is with them to make sure they don’t fall.

Love this!  I should see if my 85 year old neighbor is game for ToT!  But, I'm more likely to fall than she is, :laugh:   

 

I got kind of sad when the kids in the neighborhood got older ... my kids were younger than most.  But it was a treat to see the kids come home from college and go around to ToT.  It was great catching up with them (and they often had the most impressive costumes.)  

 

Yes, the porch light rule has been taught here but we have so many people who move here from other places where it wasn't taught that it causes friction.  Knock or ring on a door with a porch light off here and you may get scolded. I finally started putting up a sign on the door that says out of candy when I turn my light off.

 

Last year we ToTed with friends in an upscale suburban neighborhood.  Not only was the whole neighborhood out in the driveways in folding chairs, there was a wine bar set up for the parents of ToTers with buffet tables of treats set up for the kids. Not our usual, but nice.

Our neighborhood used to have the "pre-party" chili dinner at one house, and one parent would ToT with the kids (and the wagon of adult beverages) ... most parents were in costume.  The other parent would go home to hand out candy.  It was such a fun thing.  That family stopped hosting when her kids left for college.  I wish I didn't have such social anxiety about hosting because that would have been a fun tradition to keep going.  

 

Our town does not have actual rules or time limits on ToT, but they do say that you should keep your porch light off if you are not participating.  And that people should respect that.  We haven't had any problems.  

 

When I was little I wanted my mom to make me a costume of a pink elephant. From the movie Fantasia. Welll, ..... it turns out I looked more like male genitalia. I supposedly was constantly asked in a shocked voice, “What are you?!?!â€

:lol:  :lol:  Too funny.  One year, one of my kids wanted to go as Sauron from LOTR.  I tried to make the "eye" out of poster board and make a contraption to suspend it so that K's face would be in the center of the "eye."  K tried it on and looked in the mirror.  Kept saying "Nope.  Not wearing it! "  I was disappointed and hurt until K showed me and said "I look like a flower!"  I burst out laughing and agreed.  K decided to go as something else.

[mytwomonkeys]

I think as long as the kids/teens want to dress up there should be no cut-off date. My kids are 16 & almost 14. Neither want to trick or treat anymore. But if they wanted too, it wouldn’t bother me.😊

[LucyStoner]

Let kids stay kids. I hate it when people cut young teens or even older teens off.

[Catwoman]

I like the idea of having them escort someone younger once they are getting a bit on the too old side. We are in a weird stage right now where the child who still wants to go is almost 6 feet tall and his little brother is too young to go yet, so he can't just take his little bro as an excuse. I suggested he help pick out what we buy and he can hand out the candy and keep some for himself so that he still gets candy but I still can't decide if I should let him go or not. He's almost 16 but he's so tall he looks adult height already and without his younger brother I feel people may not like having a kid his size come to their door trick or treating.

Let him go! Does he have any other kids his age who will go with him?

 

He would definitely be welcomed in our neighborhood. We get lots of teens. :)

[skimomma]

Where did the chili tradition come from?  I ask because this was my FOO tradition growing up (Texas roots) and I have kept it going at my own house (WAY northern US).  People where I live now seem to think it is strange although they do still keep coming to chili dinner before ToTing.  They have adopted it because we have been doing it for two decades but still think it is odd.  I grew up with the understanding that Halloween and chili are a "thing."  Is it a "thing?"  

[Junie]

We actually stopped giving out candy on Halloween when our oldest dc were quite small, precisely because of the teen trick-or-treaters.  Not that they were rude or anything - most were very polite - but because of the detailed gruesomeness of their costumes.  The little kids dressed up like princesses and ghosts and wild animals and pirates, but the big kids had axes through their heads and bloody, dangling eyeballs and other creepy things I just didn't want to have in my brain or my dc's brains.  I remember trick-or-treating as a teen and having a ton of fun, but we were never gory.  It's changed a lot since then.  

 

This is why we don't let trick or treaters come to the door.  I really don't need nightmare-prone littles seeing some of these costumes.

 

Same here. In years past the local police have done foot patrols on our street and announced to the city that it's safest to t or t here.  They even blocked off some of the street. And we'd get upwards of 1000 kids if the weather was good. All between 5:30 and 7:30. It. Was.Crazy.   We'd have church buses drop kids off to work our street. One year we had a church bus from across the state line...22 miles away! 

 

Because of this, we had a wide variety of trick or treaters...from sweet and polite to downright terrifying.  And the cost was not insignificant. 

 

I don't know the answer for kids who don't live where it's safe to walk door to door, but I am glad that the heyday of t or t is over here.  They no longer block off the street because so many parents drive door to door.  Which means we do not try to come or go during those hours....traffic is nuts.  Now we only get about 400-600 at our end of the street. 

 

 

You know, I do have an answer. Our city has all kinds of festivals and events and they could do a city wide trunk or treat using one of the city properties they use for other events.  They could even do it during the day on a weekend.  I would totally love that. 

 

:scared:  That is horrible!

 

What I do (mainly due to our barky dog) and many of our neighbors do is to sit out in the driveway or on the front step with the candy, at least during the prime hour or so. Everyone chit-chats, some of the neighbors gather together, it's a lot of fun and solves the problems you mention. No one can case my home, because they aren't even peeking inside. No one scares or surprises me, because I'm watching them come up the street. No one does anything to my house, because I'm sitting out there with the candy. Makes it a social, fun evening for me. 

 

This is what a lot of families in our neighborhood do.  Most years we don't participate in trick or treat, but I like catching up with the neighbors.