Bigger families...do you go out to eat, to the movies, etc?

[goldberry]

We only have one child, but we love to eat out.  To keep it under control, we all have waters (we are water drinkers anyway) and no apps or desserts.  Drinks, apps, and desserts can almost double a bill!

 

 

[Ottakee]

We are trying to balance the budget with also trying to give 5 "teens" some great life experiences and a taste of "normal" family life.....whatever that is.

 

We took just our adopted 3 (we didn't have the others at the time) out west 2 summers ago and realized quickly that most of the time the food was disappointing for the cost.  We had a few meals that were worth it.....my favorite being the deck at Jackson Hole Ski resort which overlooked the mountains.  Our other memorable meals were mom making PB&J in the back of the mini van in the rain at Yellowstone.

 

I am also trying to find more free/low cost events.  We are super blessed to live in near a top small town tourist area with one of the best fresh water beaches.  There is a 2 mile long boardwalk, the beach, and in the summer every Sunday evening there is a free outdoor  Christian concert with big name acts.  I want to take the kids to do more walking/hiking, maybe geocaching, kayaking (we own 2 and can access more for free), etc.

 

While we want to give our foster kids a great experience with us, often they go back to families or situations were they are low income.  We want them also to learn how to use free community resources, parks, nature, etc. for entertainment as well.

[amy g.]

With 5 kids, eating out is easily $100-$150. We never eat fast food, so even when I have 2 kids with me, it is $60. And I over tip. We don't go out every week.

 

We only go to the movies every few months. We don't eat anything there because there is no food we like. Dh does buy me a margarita for the movie though.

 

Generally, we like being home. We like eating the food we make ourselves. We like watching movies at home.

 

Friday, we had friends visit. Their 4 year old started getting cranky and I knew that we didn't have any food here that he would like, so we treated everyone to a restaurant meal.

 

We usually only eat out when there is a reason to. Even for Valentine's Day, Dh asked if I wanted to go out, but I said I'd rather grill steaks at home.

[HRAAB]

When all 5 were home, eating out wasn't a common occurrence.  When we did, it was usually pizza or Chinese.  A couple other things we did to keep costs down was never order drinks, just water, and we would share meals.  Dh and I always share meals, regardless of cost.  We just don't eat that much.  Our girls weren't big eaters, either, and I would end up with so much left over food, that it seemed a wise thing to do.  Movies were even rarer.  We'd go as a family around Christmas if there was a movie that was important to us.  Otherwise, we go to the $1 theater.  We would make our own movie nights.  Rent a movie, have popcorn and snack food, and spread out on the floor in front of the TV.  Lots of fun.  We did a lot of outside activities as a family and would include picnics.  Also, we would make a point to take an individual girl out for a special occasion and alone time with mom or dad or both.

 

We did have our priorities, and for those we would choose to give up eating out and movies throughout the year.  For instance, we would try to take a family road trip every couple of years, attend several Shakespeare productions during the summer, take trips to local museums.  

 

I felt badly at first when I realized I wouldn't be able to give my girls everything I got (only 2 kids in my family), but I've never heard one of my children ever complain that they were deprived.  In fact, they talk about how much fun they had growing up.

[freesia]

We don't much. My kids go out to dinner at a restaurant maybe 2 times a year. I might take another child or two for fast food once or twice a year when the olders are away at camp. I've never gotten any idea that they felt/were deprived. That was about as often as I went out as a child and I think it's as normal as going out more often.

 

The movie thing is more disappointing to me. However, it makes things like Star Wars--when we do splurge --even more exciting. And we regularly do movie nights where we stream from Amazon. My older 2 go sometimes with their friends and we will take a couple of friends with the birthday child for birthdays sometimes.

 

We try to fund as many youth group activities as we can, though, so the teens can have some of those teen experiences--paint ball, etc.

 

Honestly, I think it's good for them to learn moderation. Hopefully it will set realistic expectations for them in their 20's. They won't expect to do everything. However, going occasionally means they aren't deprived so hopefully they won't feel a need to overspend to make up for what they missed. We'll see.

 

And, fwiw, anecdotally I see no correlation irl to how often families have treats like dinners out, movies, Disney trips and how happy they are or how functional as families.

[FaithManor]

When income was tighter and we had all four kids at home, five during the year we had guardianship of our niece, we did not eat out, but we did splurge for ice cream cones. We didn't go to the movies, waited to rent and then had a popcorn movie night at home, however we did splurge for family memberships to museums. We also took advantage of our great state park system here in Michigan. $20.00 annual pass for the van, and tons and tons of free park ranger program events all summer long from nature hikes to outdoor movie night to specialty wildlife experts doing all kinds of things with kids, to...one time the kids got to go on a paleontology hike. Maybe for teens there wouldn't be so much, but we found we could usually rent or borrow canoes and kayaks until we could afford them ourselves, so we packed lunches and hit the beach all summer long. I don't know what Lake Michigan is like for kayaking (I think you are on that side of the state if memory serves) but over here on Lake Huron, it is wonderful.

 

For out of state travel, we packed our food, and waited for good weather so we could camp, or we simply only went to locations where we could stay with relatives. We did AYSO soccer a couple of years because the price was very reasonable. As far as music, I can't speak to how to do that cheaply. Since I have my piano performance and music education degrees, I have provided all of their private lesson instruction at home. However, some of the Lutheran churches have very good children's choirs, teen choirs as well, so maybe you could look into those programs if you are worried about music participation.

 

We also took advantage of the freebie days that occasionally popped up at art institutes. Check with your local universities and colleges because some offer super reduced prices to students for plays and concerts. We haul our crew over to Alma College all the time because their theater department is great and students are free. They charge $10.00 each for dh and I. Our boy at U of MI Flint can get his brothers into a lot of events for $5.00 each, and $10.00 is the most I have paid as a parent. In the music department, all of the money goes to their scholarship fund so I am happy to pay for that. We have between these two colleges attended nine plays, five concerts, a one man comedy show, and heard Carrie from Mythbusters speak all in the last 18 months for less than $200.00!

 

4-H is another good option if you have a county with a robust program, lots of offerings. In our county we have dh and I's STEM club, several arts and crafts clubs, a cooking club, a life skills club (specifically for students who are in foster care and includes everything from cooking and baking to balancing a checkbook to job shadowing to community service to field trips to Michigan State U) and all for $10.00 a year though sometimes parents are asked to contribute to the cost of projects or to pay for something taking place at MSU...usually the transportation is provided for free, and if it is overnight, we have a scholarship fund that helps offset costs.

 

I think there are a lot of options out there, though certainly we've had to get creative and do some driving because we live in a rural area. But it does take some digging to find them. I do think it was good for kids to see us being creative and looking for reasonably priced options for extra curricular activities.

 

Though we can now afford it, we've never done Disney. That's just us. Our kids aren't Disney people. However, we have done Space Camp! Yep, we are THAT kind of nerd family, LOL.

[ashfern]

We go out to eat at lunch because it's cheaper. We also have a buffet that all of the kids like (small miracle). We don't go out to the movies often and usually it's just the older two kids. We don't get popcorn or drinks at the theater. My mom will take the kids to the movies and I think she buys them popcorn. She takes them to the movies that I don't want to see.  :lol:

[frogger]

It would probably be more in line with amount of food consumed to charge double the adult price for teens at a buffet. :)

Edited February 22, 2016 by frogger

[ksr5377]

We have 4 and probably go out to a decent sit-down restaurant once a month or so thanks to visiting grandparents:). I can cook fairly well but enjoy no part of it, so I'm always thankful. My parents were here Friday and there was a lot going on so we did takeout from Bob Evans and it was still $70. I can't imagine when they're teenagers!

[BusyMom5]

We are a family of 7, and we do sometimes take the kids to see a movie (not often, maybe once a year or so?) or out to eat.  A sit-down meal costs upwards of  $60+ even when we try to eat moderately, so it's not often.  We sometimes do McDonalds- which is still $35!  but not that often.  We do movies on Netfilix and make our own pizza and such. 

[Tsuga]

 

 

 We went to a place with pony rides and I joked that it would be cheaper for us to buy a pony.

 

HAH! Seriously, with the work that went into it, it actually was cheaper for us to buy XC skis than to rent for so many, because many skis are sold in sets of two or three pairs as people age or grow out of them. We have boots in 10 sizes!

[LisaKinVA]

Back in the states?  Nope.  Here?  Much more often.

 

Movies on base are $3 per person, $1.50 for under 12.

I can buy pizza for the whole family, and have leftovers for $20 (down the street).

A NICE dinner out (better than most "affordable" restaurants back home) runs me $100, and that would be appetizers, main course and water. We are a family of 7 for comparisons sake.

 

We go to movies about once or twice a quarter.  Back home, it was once a year.

We have pizza "out" once or twice a month.  Back home, it was once a quarter.

We eat out at a nicer restaurant about once a quarter.  Back home...gosh, I don't remember when we ever took the family out for something outside of a 20 piece nuggets for $4.99 :p  I know we did, but it was so rare I can't remember!  Usually, it was an ice cream cone!!

 

There are some benefits to living here.

[Hypatia.]

We rarely go out to dinner, usually if we're traveling or on our way back from an event. We're more likely to get takeout, since my 3 year old can be challenging. 

 

As for movies, it has to be something we REALLY want to see for us to take everyone out. When Star Wars came out the local drive-in did a special winter opening so we saw it there. Then DH and DD2 saw it again a few days later, then DS1, DD1 and I saw it ourselves again. We split up for movies more often if we don't wait for DVD, or see it separately. It's usually not worth it to try to find a babysitter. I went to see Deadpool by myself because DH didn't really care too much about it, and he'll do the same for movies he really wants to see. 

[wintermom]

We go out to the movies once a year when my parents send us gift certificates. That's about all we'd want to go out anyway, as there aren't that many fantastic family movies, imo. ;) We'll buy the DVD and watch it at home, or now with Netflix we can see more movies, too. No one's missing out on any earth-shattering stuff.

 

Eating out - we used to eat out up to 6 times a year, but we're cutting way back to save money. I'm putting more effort into making healthy, great tasting meals. It's working out really well, and it's much better health-wise, too.

 

 

We've not taken the dc to Disneyland or world, 6 flags or other theme parks, either, and have no plans to ever do this. Massive waste of money for what you actually get. Fine if you have cash to burn, but not at all essential for a "happy childhood." 

[desiree77]

 

 

We've not taken the dc to Disneyland or world, 6 flags or other theme parks, either, and have no plans to ever do this. Massive waste of money for what you actually get. Fine if you have cash to burn, but not at all essential for a "happy childhood."

We've taken our 5 kids to Six Flags using Read to Succeed tickets. I think we've spent at most $150, usually less, to pay for parking, and extra tickets for those of us who didn't get the free tickets. We bring our own lunch and we don't buy souvenirs. Definitely not needed for a happy childhood, but I'm grateful that the Read to Succeed program has allowed us to go for the past few years.

[wintermom]

We've taken our 5 kids to Six Flags using Read to Succeed tickets. I think we've spent at most $150, usually less, to pay for parking, and extra tickets for those of us who didn't get the free tickets. We bring our own lunch and we don't buy souvenirs. Definitely not needed for a happy childhood, but I'm grateful that the Read to Succeed program has allowed us to go for the past few years.

 

Awesome that you were able to take advantage of a great deal like this.