Dealing with, "I don't know!"

[Paige]

How do you deal with children that repeatedly give I don't know answers to opinion questions or "why do you think____" questions? I am getting really frustrated with some people in my house. Even if I talk them through the question and give them multiple possible scenarios, they still say, "I don't know." I've tried telling them that they don't have to even believe it- just pick a possibility and defend it as if they believed it! 

 

I know these students only want questions with neat little factual answers they can pull from the text, but that's not a reasonable expectation. I'm afraid that I help too much and give too many possible answers and they are manipulating me into doing their thinking. On the other hand, if I refuse to help they will do NOTHING and cry. I've tried being patient and telling them to just keep thinking but they are obviously more stubborn/patient than me because I've never seen the technique work. 

 

Any suggestions for how to get past this? 

 

I'm talking about questions like, "What do you think happened next?", "Why do you think character A felt like this?" or "Using your knowledge of X, explain why Z happened."

 

The students involved are 8-12. My oldest never did this- he always had ideas about everything. I may have had to help him organize the ideas into a logical response, but he at least gave me something to work with. 

 

 

[Guest]

 

 

I'm talking about questions like, "What do you think happened next?", "Why do you think character A felt like this?"

 

The students involved are 8-12. . 

 

"I am already aware you don't KNOW. That is why I ask you what you think.

 

If you do not --think-- then you need to do first grade work because people your age need to be able to think!"

 

Basically I'd get them a little dizzy on the word "think" and insist they answer. ymmv

[Arcadia]

For literature, my oldest gives meaningful answers but that can take hours or days. He thinks so deeply that he is stuck answering. He also prefers written to verbal questions.

My youngest on the other hand would give you an answer just to move on to the next question. He just wants to get done. For him, it means that the first pass at answering won't be best effort.

 

Are they bored by the questions or they need more scaffolding or they are used to be prompted so they are waiting for more prompts?

 

When we tried Jacobs Ladder a few years ago, my kids needed handholding initially before they get the hang of it. They didn't know what is expected from them.

[Paige]

"I am already aware you don't KNOW. That is why I ask you what you think.

 

If you do not --think-- then you need to do first grade work because people your age need to be able to think!"

 

 

 

I pretty much say that. I continue to get "but I can't think of anything." 

[Paige]

For literature, my oldest gives meaningful answers but that can take hours or days. He thinks so deeply that he is stuck answering. He also prefers written to verbal questions.

My youngest on the other hand would give you an answer just to move on to the next question. He just wants to get done. For him, it means that the first pass at answering won't be best effort.

 

Are they bored by the questions or they need more scaffolding or they are used to be prompted so they are waiting for more prompts?

 

When we tried Jacobs Ladder a few years ago, my kids needed handholding initially before they get the hang of it. They didn't know what is expected from them.

 

I don't know. I don't think they are bored. Usually they are the type to just want to get it done so I don't think they are deliberately stalling. I think they are impatient with the process of thinking. 

[redsquirrel]

I reassure that there isn't a right or wrong answer. I make sure I don't stomp on what he does answer or make him think he is incorrect. I might model it by saying 'well, I don't know either, but this is what I think....." 

 

If it is a question like "What do you think happened next" and I get an answer like "I don't know" then I will say something like, "well, go back and reread because clearly you didn't read it very well.  I'll wait until you have an answer."  And yes, I have done exactly that.  I will sit down, pull out my phone and start checking twitter until I get an answer an answer.  If he can't be bothered to meet me half way then I can't be bothered to teach. It generally takes about 30 seconds to get a response.  If it is a response that makes no sense, I ask for specific examples from the text as proof.

 

If I ask 'what did this character feel' and I get 'i don't know' I will usually propose the exact opposite of what I would expect as the answer.  So, if I expect that the answer is 'sad' I will say "Do you think she felt happy after her family died, excited to be on her own in the world?"  If I get a yes then I will ask why and to give me examples from the text to prove it.  I don't need much to make me happy, just a word to let me know you read it.

 

And again, if it were 'using your knowledge of X, tell me why Z happened" and I got "I don't know" then we are just going to wait until he rereads and is able to give me an answer.  And I can wait a long time.

 

OTOH, if a student is actually having trouble extracting information from the text then I would approach it totally differently. I am answering from the position of where I sit with my particular wise-ass kids. 

 

If it is stubbornness, then clearly I just need to make it so difficult for them that they would rather work with me than spend their time waiting to get out of it.  Rereading while I wait, having to read the assignment out loud a paragraph at a time until the answer is found, those are the sorts of things I have resorted to with my own pig headed children. 

[Critterfixer]

 

I know these students only want questions with neat little factual answers they can pull from the text, but that's not a reasonable expectation. I'm afraid that I help too much and give too many possible answers and they are manipulating me into doing their thinking. On the other hand, if I refuse to help they will do NOTHING and cry. I've tried being patient and telling them to just keep thinking but they are obviously more stubborn/patient than me because I've never seen the technique work. 

 

Usually tears are a sign of deep frustration that is just too complicated to give vent to. Opinion questions, after all, should take into account the facts gathered from the text. Those should be gathered first and chewed on. Then, if the facts merit having an opinion (and not everything merits one) then questions can be asked. Scaffold the heck out of it. Show them how the facts support having an opinion.

 

As an example: Why do you think Character A felt like this? (I wouldn't even attempt this question with either of my boys without major scaffolding, and even then, my hFA son would have all kinds of trouble with it!) But if I had to, this is how it would go.

 

In the text, Character A states_________________. What are the emotions she shows? Prompt-particularly if the emotions are conveyed by body language. Now, what do we know about Character A that would make her act this way? Prompt-reference material from previous sentences or paragraphs that might point to motive. Okay, so would you say she is feeling this way because this happened to her earlier? Yes, that's what we call character motivation.

 

I'd also judiciously limit these kinds of questions to one a day that doesn't involve more than two to three steps in the process until they get used to it and confident enough to start telling you what they think about some of their favorite reading without any prompting. You might be expecting a little too much for their age if they haven't had much training in how to go through a question like the one above.

Just my two cents.

[Tsuga]

Assuming you have rephrased the question and answered questions about the question and asked them to re-read the text / problem aloud:

 

Take a walk and think about it. Have a cup of tea and think about it. This is your participation grade.

 

Or, time to clean the bathroom or kitchen floor which is the only job you're ever going to get if you don't make your brain do more of the work.

[Jean in Newcastle]

My dd has only now at 13 been able to start to answer these types of questions.  She has some undiagnosed LDs I think.  I would hate to think that she would be pulnished in some homes for having trouble with these.  

[Tsuga]

Adding: I think this is a really hard thing to teach as a homeschooled. My own kids remain silent for me but in a classroom are eager to speak because they compete with their peers. Also, among the peers there are those with worse and better answers but also the same answer so you have to be fast. That helps. I do not think it's unusual for a child simply to say to a parent "I dunno" when they'd answer the same question at quiz time.

 

Hey. There's an idea. What about compiling the questions and treating it as a trivia game? Lots of work for you, but perhaps would get them comfortable with answering?

[almondbutterandjelly]

My vsl would not be able to answer those questions, particularly at those ages.  She is a big picture thinker, and if I don't like it, too bad.  Also, her reaction to "What would happen next?" would be "How should I know?  I'm not the author."  No disrespect.  Completely serious.

 

We have given up on these types of questions.  We do things like tell me the beginning, middle, and end of the story.  What was the turning point?  Who were the major characters?  You know, big picture ideas.  What types of conflict were in the story.  

 

Not speculative questions.  She's 15 and they still make her cry.

[Jean in Newcastle]

My vsl would not be able to answer those questions, particularly at those ages.  She is a big picture thinker, and if I don't like it, too bad.  Also, her reaction to "What would happen next?" would be "How should I know?  I'm not the author."  No disrespect.  Completely serious.

 

We have given up on these types of questions.  We do things like tell me the beginning, middle, and end of the story.  What was the turning point?  Who were the major characters?  You know, big picture ideas.  What types of conflict were in the story.  

 

Not speculative questions.  She's 15 and they still make her cry.

Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes.  My dd is a visual spacial learner as well.  Though with some scaffolding she's able to do some now.  

[Tsuga]

I guess I assumed that teaching how to answer these questions was part of the program. Like, what would happen next... Well duh, nobody knows of course. Why did the author wrote that? Because she was paid to. I do agree you have to explain this:

 

Suppose the people in the story are real people and the main character asked you what she should get ready for. What would you say she should probably expect assuming there are no surprises? That is the real question.

 

Has there been any instruction in answering these questions?

[Critterfixer]

 

 

 Why did the author wrote that? Because she was paid to.

:lol: I pulled that one in American lit in college. The professor was not pleased.

[Harriet Vane]

I respond, "Think about it a minute."

 

Then I wait for an answer.

 

Generally they come up with something.

[redsquirrel]

Since they are 8-12 years of age, you might consider making use of the "detective' workbooks from Critical thinking press.  There is Science Detective, Reading Detective, History Detective, and I think even Math Detective. I know at least History Detective would only be for the older kids, not the 8 year old. But there is a Science and Reading Detective book for the younger ones.

 

It promotes reading comprehension and finding proof in the text.  My kids actually liked them a lot because they are excellent at reading comprehension, but I liked that it made them be specific in their work.  They follow the same sequence, you read a selection and then answer questions about what you read. The paragraphs are lettered and the sentences are numbered. The questions the student to answer with either the paragraph(s) or sentence(s) that answers the question.  There are also a couple questions that require the student to make a bit of a leap, a 'using what you know about X, what about Z' type questions.

 

I use them as enrichment, Science detective is not my science curriculum. I don't think it would work for that. But as a once a week enrichment exercise it is great.  The books say that they are appropriate for example, grades 4-5 and I can spread a book out over grades 4-5 b/c we only use it once a week. At the very least, using one of them might give you some insight into their reading comprehension.  You aren't having to ask the questions, it is done in writing and they only have to write a few sentences and pick out the proof from the text. 

 

And I think an 8 year old can get a pass on 'why did this happen' or 'what do you think'.  My kids could answer those questions at that age, but not all 8 year olds can. It has nothing do to with intelligence and everything to do with development. But a 12 year old should be at least starting to make those connections. Like I said earlier, my kids can give a lot of attitude from 8-12. I've been through it with the older and the 10 year old is in the thick of it.  Their 'I don't know" isn't a blank look, but a snotty whine. There is a difference.

 

Are the kids in the 10 and up ages studying logic in any capacity?  Bringing them into the world of questioning what you see, seeing cause and effect might make some changes. At that age, my older boy loved looking at different kinds of advertising. Something like "Made you look" might go over well.  

[fdrinca]

My stock responses are "I don't know means you've not thought about it," or "then what information do you need so that you would know?" I use either, depending on the child and the reason I'm getting "I don't know." Either way, it moves us forward.

[Plink]

"Tell me about the part you do know, and when we get to the part you don't know we can stop there and talk about it."

[Paige]

Usually tears are a sign of deep frustration that is just too complicated to give vent to. 

 Eh, my girls cry about everything. If the lead in their pencils break or their erasers roll under the couch, they're likely to cry about it. 

 

I think maybe more scaffolding would help, especially with the younger. I thought I'd been doing a lot, but probably not as much as has been described. I ask them leading questions and fill it into an outline for them if they give me an answer. I will also give them possible answers from a wide range of possibilities from the logical to the fantastical, and then ask which is more likely, and if they can think of more. I haven't walked them back through the story or video and asked questions along the way.

 

I also get "I don't know" even with things like "write a sentence with subject, action verb, direct object, and another with subject, linking verb, subject compliment." They make a list of each and then can't combine it because "they don't know?" ??? 

 

We have used Reading Detective in the past. They hated it. I may try it again since we're almost done with their current reading.

 

I sent the 8yr old to the computer today when she "couldn't think of anything" and told her to research the topic further until she came up with an idea. Surprisingly, it worked, but I dislike the idea of doing it all the time. I'm afraid it could lead to cheating or plagiarism. I know she didn't just copy off the internet today because her spelling was so bad and she's not the type to fake bad spelling to make it look real!

[Critterfixer]

 

 Eh, my girls cry about everything. If the lead in their pencils break or their erasers roll under the couch, they're likely to cry about it. 

 

So, sensitive and dramatic? :laugh:

But, yes, I think you need to scaffold more, especially with the younger.

And by all means! Let the kids go dig on their own! That's how you get the information you need to figure out what you might want to think or say about anything. If you know you are going to be discussing a character with say, a certain archetype, why not pick up another book that has a similar character so that you can compare and contrast them? If you are going to be talking about a nature subject, pick up books and maybe a documentary to watch together. The more sources they have to go to, the more they are likely to go on their own treasure hunts, and what better way to learn how to think through things?

[redsquirrel]

How do you feel about bribery, lol.

 

No, I am serious.  It is sounding like, at least with the older ones, they need to work a bit more independently or think more independently. So, and I totally did this with my older boy in different circumstances, line up chocolate chips...or raisins or pennies or whatever, but have it be one for each questions.  Tell them, for every "I don't know" without an attempt at genuine mental work you, the teacher, get to eat one chip.  If they think, reflect, whatever word you want and produce an acceptable answer, they get the chip or sticker or whatever.  You can make it stickers and after they get 25 stickers they can pick a movie to watch or something like that.  Make it work for you.

 

When my son was 12 he was SO careless in his work. It was beyond imagining. He skipped questions, his writing was unreadable, he made the stupidest mistakes possible in his math and other work.  So, I made a very clear definition of what a careless mistake was, and for every math question he got wrong b/c of a careless mistake, I got the chocolate chip. For every question that had no careless mistakes he got the chocolate chip.  He could even get the question incorrect as long as it wasn't due to what I had already describes as carelessness.

 

In less than 2 weeks it was no longer necessary to bribe him. He got the point and got a lot better. Not perfect...but I could live with it.

 

My only caution is to really think it through so you can give a clear message about what is and what is not acceptable. It's not like you expect them to 'know' everything...but you expect them to make an effort and they are not meeting your expectations.

 

I know this prob isnt what you are looking for, but I thought I would share it on the off chance it might spark an idea for you.

[Sk8ermaiden]

For how do you think the character feels? I used to say, "Well, her dog is lost, her friend is mad at her, she failed a test...how would YOU feel if those things happened to you?" And when she would answer "sad", I would say, if you feel sad, then the character likely feels sad too. Then I would pull some things out of the reading that demonstrated the sadness and told her they were clues to how the character felt. 

Predict what comes next was harder, but I usually did the same thing - put her in the position of the character. OK...you've been beamed up into a spaceship...what are some things that might happen next? 

[Arcadia]

I haven't walked them back through the story or video and asked questions along the way.

 

We have used Reading Detective in the past. They hated it. I may try it again since we're almost done with their current reading.

We used Reading Detective for test prep since that is my boys weakest section on standardised tests. It worked for that purpose.

 

For literature, we use literature guides, some of which are free online. Having questions every three chapters of a novel help for my oldest.

e.g. For shiloh for my youngest in 2nd or 3rd grade

http://www.glencoe.com/sec/literature/litlibrary/pdf/shiloh.pdf

[MerryAtHope]

My teen still doesn't like to "predict" what "might" happen. Try different questions. "What did you think when the character did xyz? Would you have done that? What could the character have done instead?" or "Why do you think the character did/thought abc? Do you agree? Why or why not?"

 

There are lots of discussion questions that can get you into a good conversation about a book that have nothing to do with predictions, and that still show a level of thought and understanding. 

 

[Alicia64]

A way to take pressure off the situation (if the kid is feeling pressure: not saying you're applying it!) is to say, "okay, I get that you don't know. . . it's okay to make your best guess and we'll work from there. That's fine!"

 

"Guesses" in the adult world are called hypothesis. Again, I wouldn't use that word, though, because it'll cause more anxiety. I would just go with "make a guess -- it doesn't even have to be the best guess ever. Just make a guess. And, later, if you don't like that guess. You can make another guess."

 

It sounds like your goal is to reduce anxiety so that they can go forward. Anxiety gets in most people's way in one way or another. It's normal. I don't think your younger kids need to feel like they're exasperating you. I think reducing their anxiety should be the plan.

 

Alley

[sassenach]

My teen still doesn't like to "predict" what "might" happen. Try different questions. "What did you think when the character did xyz? Would you have done that? What could the character have done instead?" or "Why do you think the character did/thought abc? Do you agree? Why or why not?"

 

There are lots of discussion questions that can get you into a good conversation about a book that have nothing to do with predictions, and that still show a level of thought and understanding.

Yes! I loathe those types of questions. As a student I always found them utterly pointless. See also, rewrite the ending to this book.

[The Governess]

I have one who does this. I think it is a lack of confidence. "I don't know" is the first thing she'll say if an immediate answer doesn't come to mind. Once she decides to actually think (yes, often while crying, complaining, or moaning about it), she can usually come up with a fine response. Some of my responses:

 

"You might not know right this second, but if you think about it/read it again/look at it carefully/etc. then in a few minutes you might know. So do that and then let's try again."

 

"Ok, you don't know. But if you did know, what would you say?"

 

"I'll give you a couple of minutes to try this. It's okay if you get it wrong. After you've tried then we'll talk about your answer and if it's not quite right then we will fix it together."

 

"Trying to think about something on your own is hard work, but it's a skill you need to learn. This skill is more important than having the right answer. If I help you right away when you don't know the answer, you will never learn this skill. As your teacher, I need to make sure you learn how to think about hard questions, even though it's not always fun for you."

 

And on and on. It's slowly improving, but sometimes I feel like a broken record. ;)

[daijobu]

How do you feel about bribery, lol.

 

No, I am serious.  

 

 

 

I had a professor who would toss a candy bar to any student who raised their hand to participate or answer a question. 

 

I'm certainly not a literature person, but maybe make your questions closer to true/false or multiple choice.  

 

"If you were to make a bet, would you bet the character would lie or tell the truth about her situation?"

 

"Do you think the character was motivated by (A) greed, (B) indifference, or © vengeance?

[bolt.]

Try replacing the word "think" with words like "guess" or "provide one possibility". Use "could happen" instead of "will happen".

 

If you can modify written questions, word them as instructions instead of direct questions. Example: "In the blank, write one guess that you have about what could possibly happen next to these characters." This transforms the question to "right" (if the student does write a guess) vs "wrong" (if they write no guesses) -- instead of "right" only if they guess "correctly".

 

"I don't know" can be met with, "Of course not. Nobody knows. That's why the question is there! This question is to see whether you will make a guess or won't make a guess. Saying you 'don't know' is not the same as saying you 'won't guess'. Let's start your answer with, 'I don't know, but maybe...' Maybe what?"

 

Maybe also open the situation with humour by always suggesting that the answer 'could be' flying monkeys or some-such.