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I have never canned anything. I do make my own bread, though, and dry herbs. But canning? Um, no. I'm too scared I will accidentally poison my peeps.

I have always felt like a dunce because I do not make bread. Never ever. And I know so many people who make ALL their bread AND homemade pizza crust. I have an old old neglected bread machine hiding in the back of the pantry.

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I have always wanted to learn canning. The kiddos have a garden this year (we just picked our firstfruits yesterday, yay!)

 

Susan - can you recommend any books for a novice canner?

I think the best way to learn is to have a friend come over to your house and help you can for a morning or afternoon. They will help calm you when you freak out because it is taking too long for things too boil, or your jar falls over in the water, or you forget to wipe the jar edge, or you can't tell if the jar has sealed properly. :D

 

Other than that, I would look online at the Ball (jar company) instructions, and find some good videos on youtube. I get most of my recipes/instructions from www.pickyourown.org .

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Your jams sound yummy! My kids just like strawberry, so that's all I make! But we have a couple of peach trees so I got 14 qts. canned so far of those and I also got about half dozen pints of tomatoes put up.

Oh yummy! I am so impressed that you canned that many peaches! I tried to can fresh peach slices once and nearly lost my mind - they seemed so hard to work with. I have since learned to freeze the peaches for a short time and then run them under hot water to get the peels off. But slicing was such a pain I have never done it since. Maybe I should try just cutting them in half?

 

Anyway, tell me how you do it and I might give it another try because I know for sure that I will not turn a whole bushel of peaches into jam!

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The shoe tying video was pretty awesome.  

 

I want to contribute to the insanity, but I'm not sure I'm cool enough.  How about this:

 

Recently, I remembered a series of elephant jokes my grandmother used to tell me.  I started telling them to the kids, who thought they were hilarious.  So I googled to see if I could find some more.  It turns out that elephant jokes were this big fad back in the day and everyone used to tell them!  

 

Here's a few:

 

How do you know an elephant has been in your fridge?  

Elephant tracks int he peanut butter.

 

How do you know an elephant is behind the door?

You can smell the peanut butter on his breath.  

 

How many elephants can fit in a car?

4.  2 in the front, 2 in the back.

 

How many giraffes can fit in a car?

None, it's full of elephants!

 

How can you tell there are elephants in your apartment?

There's an empty car parked out front. 

 

And so on.  

Anyone else remember these?  

 

You're in!

 

Elephant jokes ROCK.

 

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Oh yummy! I am so impressed that you canned that many peaches! I tried to can fresh peach slices once and nearly lost my mind - they seemed so hard to work with. I have since learned to freeze the peaches for a short time and then run them under hot water to get the peels off. But slicing was such a pain I have never done it since. Maybe I should try just cutting them in half?

 

Anyway, tell me how you do it and I might give it another try because I know for sure that I will not turn a whole bushel of peaches into jam!

I put them in a pot of boiling water for a minute and the peels come right off. I don't slice them. I quarter them. Then I put them in the boiling sugar solution (http://nchfp.uga.edu this website has recipes) until it boils, then put the fruit in jars, then put the lids on and put them in the bath. And I don't do a ton at a time. It's manageable if you only do 4-5 quarts a day. I finally broke down and bought a hot water canner. It can hold several jars at a time. In years past I did the hot water bath in my largest soup pot. Rather rinky dink, to be sure.
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The shoe tying video was pretty awesome.

 

I want to contribute to the insanity, but I'm not sure I'm cool enough. How about this:

 

Recently, I remembered a series of elephant jokes my grandmother used to tell me. I started telling them to the kids, who thought they were hilarious. So I googled to see if I could find some more. It turns out that elephant jokes were this big fad back in the day and everyone used to tell them!

 

Here's a few:

 

How do you know an elephant has been in your fridge?

Elephant tracks int he peanut butter.

 

How do you know an elephant is behind the door?

You can smell the peanut butter on his breath.

 

How many elephants can fit in a car?

4. 2 in the front, 2 in the back.

 

How many giraffes can fit in a car?

None, it's full of elephants!

 

How can you tell there are elephants in your apartment?

There's an empty car parked out front.

 

And so on.

Anyone else remember these?

I like Tim Conway's elephant jokes too. :D

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I think the best way to learn is to have a friend come over to your house and help you can for a morning or afternoon. They will help calm you when you freak out because it is taking too long for things too boil, or your jar falls over in the water, or you forget to wipe the jar edge, or you can't tell if the jar has sealed properly. :D

 

Other than that, I would look online at the Ball (jar company) instructions, and find some good videos on youtube. I get most of my recipes/instructions from www.pickyourown.org .

I learned the water bath too. Then my grandmother showed me to bowl the fruit, put it in the jars, and turn the jars upside down until they seal.

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Tex, I can't like your nightmare post.  That was intense!

 

Jean, hope you had a deep and lovely sleep and that your body is better for it. 

 

Susan, you are amazing! 

 

Duck, I've never heard of salt bags on the roof.

 

As for pantyhose - not sure when I wore them last.  I either wear long skirts or nice pants - with sandals in summer and boots in winter. 

 

Salt bags = panty hose with melting rock salt inside them (not the kind of salt used on roads, but the kind for masonry sidewalks and other such things... the road kind will ruin your roof.)  Throw them up along the edge of the roof to prevent ice dams from forming.   Pretty helpful if you live in an old house with inadequate insulation in the attic and a tendency for ice dams to form.  

 

Probably not helpful for you Texas gals.   ;)

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I think the best way to learn is to have a friend come over to your house and help you can for a morning or afternoon. They will help calm you when you freak out because it is taking too long for things too boil, or your jar falls over in the water, or you forget to wipe the jar edge, or you can't tell if the jar has sealed properly. :D

 

Other than that, I would look online at the Ball (jar company) instructions, and find some good videos on youtube. I get most of my recipes/instructions from www.pickyourown.org .

 

Thanks!  I'll do that.  I know just the person.  

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I put them in a pot of boiling water for a minute and the peels come right off. I don't slice them. I quarter them. Then I put them in the boiling sugar solution (http://nchfp.uga.edu this website has recipes) until it boils, then put the fruit in jars, then put the lids on and put them in the bath. And I don't do a ton at a time. It's manageable if you only do 4-5 quarts a day. I finally broke down and bought a hot water canner. It can hold several jars at a time. In years past I did the hot water bath in my largest soup pot. Rather rinky dink, to be sure.

Oh, the University of Georgia is awesome! I will try this and just cut them in half after peeling.

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A breadmaker would be lovely.  I make bread by hand, because we don't have room to store or plug-in a breadmaker.  But if I had one, we'd probably make a whole lot more bread.  

 

I thought that, too.  But then I got one (well, my sister gifted me hers).  And it was such a PITA I never used it after the first half-dozen times. (Which she later told me is why she allowed me to take it out of her house in the first place!!!)

 

I really think by hand is easier. 

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I'm thinking of starting my Facebook back up after several years away. Talk me out of it.

 

Self-inflicted annoyance. Don't do it. But if you do, PLEASE don't start a thread on this forum about how annoyed it makes you. Second-hand fb annoyances are worse than first-hand.  :lol:

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The shoe tying video was pretty awesome.  

 

I want to contribute to the insanity, but I'm not sure I'm cool enough.  How about this:

 

Recently, I remembered a series of elephant jokes my grandmother used to tell me.  I started telling them to the kids, who thought they were hilarious.  So I googled to see if I could find some more.  It turns out that elephant jokes were this big fad back in the day and everyone used to tell them!  

 

Here's a few:

 

How do you know an elephant has been in your fridge?  

Elephant tracks int he peanut butter.

 

How do you know an elephant is behind the door?

You can smell the peanut butter on his breath.  

 

How many elephants can fit in a car?

4.  2 in the front, 2 in the back.

 

How many giraffes can fit in a car?

None, it's full of elephants!

 

How can you tell there are elephants in your apartment?

There's an empty car parked out front. 

 

And so on.  

Anyone else remember these?  

 

elephant-in-the-fridge1.jpg?w=860&h=600&

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I thought that, too.  But then I got one (well, my sister gifted me hers).  And it was such a PITA I never used it after the first half-dozen times. (Which she later told me is why she allowed me to take it out of her house in the first place!!!)

 

I really think by hand is easier. 

 

 

Huh.

 

Now that you say that, I remember my mother always complained about hers breaking.  Makes me feel better about not having one.   :D

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I read something written recently by dd16 - the paper was sitting face up on her bedroom floor and I happened to look down at it while waking dd6 who shares a room with dd16. And I read it. She was writing about her worry that if she got the pixie haircut she had been planning, the boy she really likes would not like her haircut and then she would be sad. And then her worry that she might be wasting emotions on a boy who might not like her due to her haircut.

 

It's tough to be a teenager.

 

She did get the haircut and as far as I know, the boy is still a "person of interest" :D. She keeps telling dh and I how much we would really get along with his parents. Uff da.

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I read something written recently by dd16 - the paper was sitting face up on her bedroom floor and I happened to look down at it while waking dd6 who shares a room with dd16. And I read it. She was writing about her worry that if she got the pixie haircut she had been planning, the boy she really likes would not like her haircut and then she would be sad. And then her worry that she might be wasting emotions on a boy who might not like her due to her haircut.

 

It's tough to be a teenager.

 

She did get the haircut and as far as I know, the boy is still a "person of interest" :D. She keeps telling dh and I how much we would really get along with his parents. Uff da.

 

(((Susan's dd)))    Those can be rough years.  

 

 

And it's been a long time since I've heard a good uff da.  Thanks!  :thumbup1:

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I don't know what Uff da means.  Am I too old?

 

If I could get my kids to stop taking unflattering candid photos of me while I am lecturing them that would be great.

 

I am on FB and have mixed feelings about it.  If someone lived without it for years, then I say you can probably live for more years without it.  I don't really care about my personal information.  I don't know why.  I just don't.

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I don't know what Uff da means.  Am I too old?

 

If I could get my kids to stop taking unflattering candid photos of me while I am lecturing them that would be great.

 

I am on FB and have mixed feelings about it.  If someone lived without it for years, then I say you can probably live for more years without it.  I don't really care about my personal information.  I don't know why.  I just don't.

Are they taking them to send to me?   :lol:   Actually, any child who picked up a phone or camera while I was lecturing would be in for even longer lectures. . .

 

 

 

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Are they taking them to send to me?   :lol:   Actually, any child who picked up a phone or camera while I was lecturing would be in for even longer lectures. . .

The teens in my home get more information than the elementary set.

Edited by texasmama
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