Dairy & behavior issues, what exactly is it in dairy?

[kajm]

I have come to realize that dairy can cause poor behavior in my son.  We are now trying to convert to a dairy free diet, which is very difficult.  Does anyone know what exactly it is about dairy that causes poor behavior in people?  Is it casein, lactose, whey or what?  And, does anyone know if it is just cows milk that causes this?  Have you experimented with other animal dairy products, such as goat?  I'm just trying to figure this out.  Thanks!

[Spryte]

I can't answer for your son, or for anyone else, but I can tell you what it is for our family.

 

DS has multiple food allergies, and he has asthma (and had eczema).  Because most of his food allergies are life threatening, we did not explore allergies beyond avoiding the anaphylaxis triggers.  It didn't make sense to avoid more foods.  But his asthma was poorly managed, so a new allergist/asthma doc decided to test for more foods (via RAST).  Lo and behold - his bloodwork came back with IgE allergies (yes, the kind that can escalate to anaphylaxis) to dairy, wheat, corn and rice.  Uh oh.  So we did an elimination diet to see which ones might be affecting his asthma.  Dairy and wheat.  So we've been off of those for several years now, and his asthma is much better controlled.

 

But you asked about behavior, so you're probably wondering why I'm responding at all.  :)

 

For DS, asthma is intertwined with behavior.  DS's asthma is atypical - he doesn't wheeze.  He might cough.  Our one and only consistent sign is behavior.  What we know now is that when certain undesirable behaviors surface - we need to check his peak flow rather than assuming it's behavioral.  For DS, asthma triggers anxiety and an understandable fear reaction (wait, I can't get enough air!) but he hasn't always been able to articulate it.  Think fight or flight type response.

 

So... In our case, getting dairy and wheat out of DS's system improved his asthma management, which improved his behavior.  

 

I can't answer for people without true allergies, though I know some people do this without an allergist on board.  For us, it was helpful to have an allergist guiding us, and it gives me peace of mind knowing that I'm not eliminating the wrong food.  

 

Good luck finding the answers you need!

[MercyA]

Have you tried using whole milk only?  Low-fat and skim milk contains added vitamin A, which is often preserved by BHA.  BHA can cause behavioral problems.  Also, are you using cheese that contains the coloring annatto?  That can be another culprit.  Dairy products can contain other problem ingredients as well, like carrageenan, guar gum, milk protein, whey protein, and others.  It may well be that dairy itself is causing the problem, but it might be worth trying plain whole milk (not ultra-pasteurized) only, and see if that helps.

 

:grouphug:  :grouphug:  :grouphug:  

[IfIOnly]

If you can get this book from the library, it has detailed info. about how food can affect psychology: http://www.amazon.com/Gut-Psychology-Syndrome-Depression-Schizophrenia/dp/0954852028

 

A friend read and recommended this book to me: The Second Brain: The Scientific Basis of Gut Instinct and a Groundbreaking New Understanding of Nervous Disorders of the Stomach and Small Intestines

 

[MyLittleWonders]

For us it was the casein and we cannot do dairy in any form. This past spring we tried fermented goat milk as I've read the casein in goat milk is different/easier to digest than cow milk. But nope. Not here unfortunately. We have issues with anxiety/panic attacks, impulse control, aggression, and migraines, depending on the person. We now use almond milk and coconut milk.

[IfIOnly]

For us it was the casein and we cannot do dairy in any form. This past spring we tried fermented goat milk as I've read the casein in goat milk is different/easier to digest than cow milk. But nope. Not here unfortunately. We have issues with anxiety/panic attacks, impulse control, aggression, and migraines, depending on the person. We now use almond milk and coconut milk.

 

Yep, we have tried pasteurized and raw cow and goat milk and have fermented it every which way.  It's the protein we're allergic to.  

[Hypatia.]

For my kids it was the proteins that caused the behavior issues.  I started a thread with a nearly identical title on another board 7-8 years ago and there were many others that ran into the same issues.  

[kajm]

Thank you for all the replies and the suggestions, I will be sure to check them out.  Hey, anything to help!

 

We have been off all dairy for about a week and I can see a difference.  We were off it for a while before and then tried a few things like goat milk cheese, but alas, it didn't seem to matter.  Then my son had cheese for lunch the next day and, Whoa!  Did we have a doozy of an afternoon :crying: .  So now we are off it altogether.  But it is so hard when you're used to eating yogurt, milk, butter, ice cream, cheese, etc.  Part of the trouble is that we don't live in a big city, so can't get all the non-dairy options out there.  But the improved behavior is worth it. 

 

But what do you do when they're invited to a birthday party with cake and ice cream and they can have none of it?  Or a pizza party and they can't partake?  When we're all home, it doable, but it's harder when you can't police their every move.  Then, of course, we get to deal with the after effects.

 

I'm sure some of it is just trial and error to see what triggers the poor behavior and what does not.

[Susan in TN]

In our case it was a simple matter of sleeping. Dairy caused congestion - not super obvious, but enough to make breathing at night a problem. From there we were dealing with a child who was almost constantly in a state of low-level sleep deprivation.

[Ellie]

I have come to realize that dairy can cause poor behavior in my son.  We are now trying to convert to a dairy free diet, which is very difficult.  Does anyone know what exactly it is about dairy that causes poor behavior in people?  Is it casein, lactose, whey or what?  And, does anyone know if it is just cows milk that causes this?  Have you experimented with other animal dairy products, such as goat?  I'm just trying to figure this out.  Thanks!

 

"Dairy" usually refers to cow's milk. 

 

I don't know exactly. People who are *allergic* to dairy will react to anything--whey, casein, anything. People who are lactose intolerant tend to only react to dairy that is recognizable as dairy, as in milk, or cheese, or yogurt. Some people can tolerate cheese but not yogurt, or yogurt but not kefir. If it's an *allergy,* we're talking about hives and anaphylactic (sp?) shock. An intolerance of some kind apparently doesn't count as an *allergy."

 

In our family, both dds could not tolerate even small amounts of dairy that was obviously dairy. :-) Food that was cooked with milk didn't seem to bother them. There were varying reactions to cheese or yogurt or cottage cheese. We just avoided those. Baked goods were not a problem (so, not a true allergy). At that time, goat milk was not available to me (and when I did taste some, it was nasty, so it's just as well, lol), and so we just avoided milk---no cold cereal, no milk as a beverage (which I didn't do anyway), no yogurt, no kefir. When dds were older they could tolerate cheese or sour cream; older dd can drink milk today with no problems, younger dd cannot.

[MyLittleWonders]

Thank you for all the replies and the suggestions, I will be sure to check them out.  Hey, anything to help!

 

We have been off all dairy for about a week and I can see a difference.  We were off it for a while before and then tried a few things like goat milk cheese, but alas, it didn't seem to matter.  Then my son had cheese for lunch the next day and, Whoa!  Did we have a doozy of an afternoon :crying: .  So now we are off it altogether.  But it is so hard when you're used to eating yogurt, milk, butter, ice cream, cheese, etc.  Part of the trouble is that we don't live in a big city, so can't get all the non-dairy options out there.  But the improved behavior is worth it. 

 

But what do you do when they're invited to a birthday party with cake and ice cream and they can have none of it?  Or a pizza party and they can't partake?  When we're all home, it doable, but it's harder when you can't police their every move.  Then, of course, we get to deal with the after effects.

 

I'm sure some of it is just trial and error to see what triggers the poor behavior and what does not.

 

I always provide something my kids can eat. I've baked pizzas (we are dairy and gluten free, plus none of my children can handle anything artificial) and sent them on paper plates, we provide our own cupcakes and ice cream. I have never had a host of a party upset at all; they are all very understanding. A couple have offered to provide something, but I always decline as I can't trust home-made items in another person's home with very few exceptions, and to buy something at the store is usually a big sticker shock for those not used to eating this way. Mine aren't fans of having to have their own treats, but it's a cupcake from mom or sit and watch everyone else eat. They tend to choose the cupcake from mom. ;)

 

"Dairy" usually refers to cow's milk. 

 

I don't know exactly. People who are *allergic* to dairy will react to anything--whey, casein, anything. People who are lactose intolerant tend to only react to dairy that is recognizable as dairy, as in milk, or cheese, or yogurt. Some people can tolerate cheese but not yogurt, or yogurt but not kefir. If it's an *allergy,* we're talking about hives and anaphylactic (sp?) shock. An intolerance of some kind apparently doesn't count as an *allergy."

 

In our family, both dds could not tolerate even small amounts of dairy that was obviously dairy. :-) Food that was cooked with milk didn't seem to bother them. There were varying reactions to cheese or yogurt or cottage cheese. We just avoided those. Baked goods were not a problem (so, not a true allergy). At that time, goat milk was not available to me (and when I did taste some, it was nasty, so it's just as well, lol), and so we just avoided milk---no cold cereal, no milk as a beverage (which I didn't do anyway), no yogurt, no kefir. When dds were older they could tolerate cheese or sour cream; older dd can drink milk today with no problems, younger dd cannot.

 

There is also protein/casein intolerance. Interestingly, some people that are casein intolerant/sensitive can eat some things - for instance, ghee, cultured products, goat/sheep versus cow. Others, like us, cannot do any of it in any form. It's not lactose intolerant and it's not an actual allergy. Personally, I tend to use the word allergy with people we don't know well because it gets the point across that we cannot eat what they are offering. Being "intolerant" seems to carry the tone of "we *can* eat it but we would rather not because we don't care for the side effects." For my kids, there can be up to a 30 day detox period for eating something they shouldn't (gluten, casein, artificial anything). But for some people we know, intolerant or sensitive just doesn't carry the weight that allergic does. I know it is not the proper use of the word, but some people don't listen to reason. ;) 

[Spryte]

 

 

But what do you do when they're invited to a birthday party with cake and ice cream and they can have none of it?  Or a pizza party and they can't partake?  When we're all home, it doable, but it's harder when you can't police their every move.  Then, of course, we get to deal with the after effects.

 

 

 

That is the million dollar question that parents of kids with LFTAs face every day.  For every outing.  :) (LTFAs = life threatening food allergies)  What will our kids eat, can they eat what everyone else eats? DS has *never* eaten cake at a party, etc, unless we brought it from home.  

 

Your case would not be so extreme, obviously, but I would just discuss ahead of time with hosts. Normally, we bring a suitable substitution to the party so DS doesn't feel left out.  When he was little, we would coordinate and try to match (even making a tiny safe R2D2 cake once to match his cousin's).  Now that he's older and not so interested in scarfing down cake and sweets, we either bring something safe for DS, or he eats ahead of time and just says no at the party (everyone knows his allergies, so there is no surprise or discomfort).  Bringing food is easier than standing in the host's kitchen scouring ingredient labels for "may contains" and wondering if their kitchen is cross-contaminated.

 

You could just tell the hosts that you avoid dairy, that DS is intolerant, and that you'll bring food for him. Or you can try to coordinate with them about serving something he can eat (most people will ask to try to come up with something they can serve).  

 

I don't think you'll need to worry about trace amounts.  We only concern ourselves with trace amounts when a child is anaphylactic.  So I don't think you'll be scouring labels as closely as I did.  Whew.  :)

 

You can do this!

[kajm]

OK, I'll bite:  How do you make pizza without cheese and have it taste as good?  You can tell we're just on the beginning of this journey, can't you? :laugh:

 

We are now using Almond milk and the kids seem to like that, but I don't know what to do about one of their absolute favorites, which is cheese.

[IfIOnly]

OK, I'll bite:  How do you make pizza without cheese and have it taste as good?  You can tell we're just on the beginning of this journey, can't you? :laugh:

 

We are now using Almond milk and the kids seem to like that, but I don't know what to do about one of their absolute favorites, which is cheese.

 

 

We love this brand of Almond Cheese and comparatively it is much, much cheaper than a lot of other DF cheeses.   https://www.azurestandard.com/shop/search?q=linsanatti&submit=

 

If you are in the above food co-ops delivery area then you could save a bundle ordering from them.  

[IfIOnly]

We love this brand of Almond Cheese and comparatively it is much, much cheaper than a lot of other DF cheeses.   https://www.azurestandard.com/shop/search?q=linsanatti&submit=

 

If you are in the above food co-ops delivery area then you could save a bundle ordering from them.  

 

Forgot to add that I've been ordering from them for over 10 hears, and they are fantastic!  

[Ann.without.an.e]

My ds is the same way. We restricted all dairy at first but eventually found he could have hard aged cheeses. Earth Balance is great :)

[gardenmom5]

usually it is casein - which is milk protein.  it is also used as an ingredient in other items.  the other milk thing is lactose. (milk sugar.)

 

eta: I know one kid who could have a mild - but not NOT sharp chedder.

[Nemom]

My daughter has an anaphylatic allergy to dairy. Two mainstream products that are dairy free and easy to find in the midwest are Smart Balance Light buttery spread and Fleishmans Unsalted stick "butter".

 

http://www.smartbalance.com/products/buttery-spread/smart-balance-light-original-buttery-spread

 

Sorry, I can't find a good link for the Fleishman's ingredient list.

[kajm]

We love this brand of Almond Cheese and comparatively it is much, much cheaper than a lot of other DF cheeses.   https://www.azurestandard.com/shop/search?q=linsanatti&submit=

 

If you are in the above food co-ops delivery area then you could save a bundle ordering from them.  

 

Thanks!  I noticed these cheeses have casein in them, a milk protein.  I take it this has not caused a problem for you?  If not, it looks terrific.

[cjzimmer1]

We love this brand of Almond Cheese and comparatively it is much, much cheaper than a lot of other DF cheeses.   https://www.azurestandard.com/shop/search?q=linsanatti&submit=

 

If you are in the above food co-ops delivery area then you could save a bundle ordering from them.  

 

I was excited to see this as all the other cheeses we've tried are gross but after reading the info realized there is casein in this so it's still a no go for us.  Bummer because I really love all the other almond products we've tried.

[IfIOnly]

Thanks!  I noticed these cheeses have casein in them, a milk protein.  I take it this has not caused a problem for you?  If not, it looks terrific.

 

 

I never noticed that. :/  Bummer! Honestly, only use dairy free cheese once a month for pizza.  It's just too expensive (even though it's less than others) to use as often as we used cheese before diagnosed allergies.  I don't notice any huge issues from eating it so am fine with a little casein in it, I guess.

[IfIOnly]

I was excited to see this as all the other cheeses we've tried are gross but after reading the info realized there is casein in this so it's still a no go for us.  Bummer because I really love all the other almond products we've tried.

 

 

Yeah, this one tastes really good and everything else we tried was gross.  Why would they put casein in it? Ugh. Lame.

[MyLittleWonders]

We use Daiya cheese when needed. It's pretty good and melts decently.

 

Also, depending on issues with dairy/casein, I would recommend staying away from all of it, including trace amounts. I know we can do products made in the same facility but cannot have anything that actually has any trace of gluten or casein in it. Our systems just can't process it.

[Crimson Wife]

Daiya cheese is the only CF cheese that I've found to be tolerable.

[Ellie]

 

 Personally, I tend to use the word allergy with people we don't know well because it gets the point across that we cannot eat what they are offering. Being "intolerant" seems to carry the tone of "we *can* eat it but we would rather not because we don't care for the side effects." For my kids, there can be up to a 30 day detox period for eating something they shouldn't (gluten, casein, artificial anything). But for some people we know, intolerant or sensitive just doesn't carry the weight that allergic does. I know it is not the proper use of the word, but some people don't listen to reason. ;)

 

:iagree:

[Tiramisu]

I have one dd who has always been a bit difficult. This winter for the first time she started getting hives. She was tested by an allergist and reacted to milk and wheat. The doctor thought multiple viruses had put her immune system on hyper-alert so she started visibly reacting to things she was only mildly allergic to before. Initially, we saw an amazing behavioral response to cutting out dairy and wheat. It seemed like a miracle. Unfortunately, it didn't last more than a few weeks. Now she she has gone back to eating limited amounts of wheat and dairy. When she over does it, though, usually at a friends house or at a party, she will not have a typical allergic reaction but feel sick to her stomach the next day--bad enough to stay home from school. I still wish she would eliminate wheat and milk entirely but it's tough without her cooperation, when she's out with friends, etc. The allergist did think a mild allergy could be irritating her system in a way that would be hard for her to put her finger on and that could impact behavior.

[Incognito]

I wanted to pop in and encourage you to consider building a diet with meats, fruits and veggies instead of trying to eliminate dairy from everything you normally make.  I found it a lot less frustrating and easier to not accidentally miss something.

 

For dairy alternatives - coconut milk works well in baking (or often just water).  Almond milk can work, but is a bit sweet.

 

Fake cheeses: We use them every once in a while - I think Daiya was good as a shredded option in some ham and cheese pizza balls I made a while ago.

 

Asian and Mexican foods often don't have cheese (or they are easy to add separately for tacos, etc.).  

 

It is worth it if you stick with it and it makes a difference in behavior.  At least, it is around here.

 

[almondbutterandjelly]

My dd is allergic to dairy (and eggs and peanuts, actually).   For years, I kept my freezer stocked with homemade cupcakes that we could take with us at a moment's notice.  I also kept it stocked with homemade pizza.  Sometimes the pizza had no cheese.  Sometimes it had Tofutti Mozzarella (would not recommend this for someone who has actually eaten and enjoyed real cheese).  The pizza always had tons of pepperoni.  

 

Even now, we can usually order a cheeseless pepperoni pizza from just about anywhere, and it is fine.  However, right when you start, you might look up ingredient listings on those.  I believe Papa John's Original Pizza Crust has no dairy at all, and that's what we went to for years until we figured out that she could tolerate any pizza crust.

 

As far as the taste, if the crust is good and there's plenty of pepperoni, it is fine.  Obviously the more expensive pizza places will tend to have better crusts than the less expensive.  We prefer Papa John's, but we usually get Little Caesar's.

[almondbutterandjelly]

For butter, Earth Balance is wonderful.  It tastes good and it bakes fine.  If you can't find it, I believe it's either Parkay or Blue Bonnet sticks that have no dairy in them at all, but they do have hydrogenized something which is why I avoid them.  But in a pinch, they work.  There's also a squeezable margarine, whose brand escapes me, that is dairy free.  It's also Blue Bonnet or Parkay or something like that.

 

I haven't seen Fleishmann's be dairy free for years, but it used to be their Unsalted Sticks were dairy free.

 

Again, highly recommend Earth Balance.  Our local Walmart carries it.

 

For ice cream, try the different dairy free options.  Some are made with coconut milk, rice milk, or soy milk.  Chocolate tends to hide the weirdness of the flavor (in comparison to dairy) a bit better than most other flavors.  Oh, and most sorbets are completely dairy free.  I had some Haagen Daaz Raspberry sorbet awhile ago.  Yum.  Plus, there are Italian Ice popsicle/ice cream things that are usually dairy free.  I believe they are called Philly Swirl.  My dd loves them.  Minute Maid pushup popsicles are also dairy free, as are all plastic tube type popsicles.

[Spryte]

SO Delicious makes a dairy free coconut milk yogurt.  

 

And google coconut milk ice cream - it's easy to make.  Or you can buy it, since you're not worried about the other allergies we are (we can't find a safe one, so have to make our own, and it's really very easy).  

 

Coconut milk is also easy to use to make a whipped cream.  Again, google it - it's a simple process, and you'll be pleasantly surprised.

 

One tip on the substitutes:  give yourself a few weeks or months to just be dairy free.  Some substitutes (like Earth Balance butter, etc) are excellent, but others are not as close to the real thing.  We tried Daiya cheese early in our dairy free lives, and could not tolerate it.  But now that we haven't had the real thing in so long... It's passable.  

 

Whether you call it an allergy or an intolerance is your call.  My child is allergic, based on tests and evidence, and diagnosed by a board certified allergist.  No decisions to make there.   :)  I do tell everyone it's an allergy, but I specifically state that it's not an anaphylactic allergy to wheat/dairy.  (His other allergies are anaphylactic.)

 

I would caution you though, that some people with true, life threatening allergies sometimes find it annoying when people who don't have true allergies call their situations "allergies."  I suppose it is like someone who avoids gluten for other reasons saying that they have Celiac.  Or someone who avoids sugar saying they are diabetic.  Or someone suspects they might have any condition but won't go to the doctor to get diagnosed and properly treated.  There is a big difference between life and death allergies, when one's child could literally stop breathing if exposed to milk.  Maybe you won't run into anyone whose child is anaphylactic to milk.  But if you do, be prepared.   Some kids are so allergic to milk that a spilled drop on their skin is enough to send them to the hospital.  It's possible that a person whose child has that type of milk allergy will take exception to your appropriating the diagnosis "allergy."

 

One more thought: again, I'd encourage you to get your child tested.  For us, DS is not currently anaphylactic to dairy.  But he could be. Allergic reactions can't be predicted, and tend to increase with time.  So if your child's reactions are caused by an IgE allergy, you need to know - and carry an epipen.  

 

Good luck!

[mommymilkies]

I agree with looking at what you CAN eat rather than what you can't when eliminating foods.  Earth Balance and Almond milk (homemade is best) really make it a lot easier, too. 

 

My problem with testing is this-we're on our second allergist (we moved, no problem with the first) and neither are fans of blood or skin testing for anything other than environmental allergens because of the high rate of false positives (and worse accuracy for young children).  Both told us elimination diet and observation are really the most accurate methods of diagnosis.  Our old allergist watched dd react to milk in office-hives so bad they bled, vomiting, green mucousy bm, etc. but her skin prick test was negative.  He said it's obvious she's allergic and not to let her near it.  Of course one should be extremely careful around anaphylactic kids, but that doesn't mean that other allergies and reactions are not also real.  

[Spryte]

 Of course one should be extremely careful around anaphylactic kids, but that doesn't mean that other allergies and reactions are not also real.  

 

Totally agree.  Allergies are serious.  And *any* allergy can progress to an anaphylactic reaction - there is no way to predict, and past reactions do not predict the future.   :)  That's why I'm always here saying, go to a board certified allergist, please!  Make sure you have an epipen on hand, just in case those allergies progress to a scary situation.  It's better to know if your allergy is an IgE mediated allergy, and be prepared, than to just guess that it is an allergy, and avoid the food.

 

We avoided peanuts and tree nuts for a year before we got to an allergist.  I shudder to remember the close calls we had because we didn't know all the ins and outs of complete avoidance.  But we didn't understand that because it hadn't yet progressed to anaphylaxis, that it could (and did).  We were lucky that it didn't progress to anaphylaxis while we didn't have an epipen!

 

You have an epipen for your kiddo, right?  I hope?  That's a serious reaction!

[mommymilkies]

Totally agree.  Allergies are serious.  And *any* allergy can progress to an anaphylactic reaction - there is no way to predict, and past reactions do not predict the future.   :)  That's why I'm always here saying, go to a board certified allergist, please!  Make sure you have an epipen on hand, just in case those allergies progress to a scary situation.  It's better to know if your allergy is an IgE mediated allergy, and be prepared, than to just guess that it is an allergy, and avoid the food.

 

We avoided peanuts and tree nuts for a year before we got to an allergist.  I shudder to remember the close calls we had because we didn't know all the ins and outs of complete avoidance.  But we didn't understand that because it hadn't yet progressed to anaphylaxis, that it could (and did).  We were lucky that it didn't progress to anaphylaxis while we didn't have an epipen!

 

You have an epipen for your kiddo, right?  I hope?  That's a serious reaction!

She grew out of that one, thankfully.  But I have two other kids with epi-pens (bees and nuts). :)

[kajm]

I wanted to pop in and encourage you to consider building a diet with meats, fruits and veggies instead of trying to eliminate dairy from everything you normally make.  I found it a lot less frustrating and easier to not accidentally miss something.

What a great thought and certainly a more positive way to think about it.  Thanks!