Is it possible my 9 year old has no interests at all of his own?

[madteaparty]

Reading the projects based thread. I would totally be on board with interest-led approaches, but a prerequisite is the interest, no? Is it just me that has the world's only not really interested or curious in anything 9 year old? Do I need to build-in more boredom?

 

To be clear: We do not homeschool yet, only afterschool. He reads books I assign, when left to his own devides he would pick something like "My Weird School" (yes, even at 9).

 

He obtained the highest grades/honor roll at his current mediocre urban public school, he is not going back next fall.

 

I've experimented with a less structured approach, as in "Do a couple of pages of math and I'll check when I wake from my nap" or some such. Do you know what he did? Skipped the parts of the book where perfect squares are taught to reach 2x2 and 5x5, did that part ONLY, and proudly announced that oddly, math was easy today.

 

If bored, he picks up the ipad and plays dragonvale or minecraft or smurfvillage. Yes, he has been exposed to Scratch, etc. Oh, just revoke my membership already...

[Terabith]

We homeschool. My kids don't have any real interests, unless you count playing Warriors or pretending to be unicorns. I've tried to do "find your passion," and they will choose to read fiction, but they don't have anything they're all interested in. So, no ideas, but you're not alone!

[Corraleno]

My DS was like that when I pulled him out of PS. He'd been so conditioned to believe that learning equals "school" — and school is unbearably pointless and boring — that he really balked at doing anything even remotely academic. And once he had access to computer/video games, that was all he thought about. If I limited screen time, then he would just sit around and mope that there was "nothing to do."

 

(1) I got rid of the games. Maybe you can reintroduce them later, after he's developed more interests. FWIW, we didn't — DS plays games at friends' houses, but we don't have them here. He's so busy now, and has so many interests, that he really doesn't miss having them at home. But for many families, it's not an issue and removing them can be a temporary thing — just until they develop other interests.

 

(2) We went places — science & natural history museums, the zoo, field trips, hiking & nature walks (w/field guides to look things up), the planetarium and "star parties" held by the local astronomy club, etc. I wanted to change the idea that "learning" = "boring books and school work," so we did lots of fun stuff that "just happened" to be educational. For a while, you may be the one who needs to look things up, get books out on the subject, etc. — you model what it's like to just be interested and engaged in what's going on around you.

 

Can your DH involve him in projects on the weekend? Build a birdhouse, dig in the yard (and see what's under the soil — do you have a microscope or loupe?), go fishing, etc. Some branches of Lowes & Home Depot have special building projects for kids on Saturdays. Anyway, the idea is for him to "tag along" on various projects, field trips, etc., while you & DH model (genuine) enthusiasm and engagement, to get him in the habit of thinking along those lines.

 

Jackie

[mathnerd]

I have a kid who has a great interest in every single thing. It is impossible to pick one interest and pursue it as every single thing is interesting - origami, ancient civilization, cooking, computer programming, archaeology, spanish, latin, japanese, chinese, greek, french, martial arts, baseball, football, swimming, archery, fencing, lacrosse, hockey, ice skating, horseback riding, architecture, oceanography, astronomy, biology, geography ... - you know what I mean!

It is the same condition as the OP is talking about, but manifesting in the opposite way. So, now I know that I am not alone either.

[Mommy22alyns]

Right now, Sylvia specializes in imaginative play. :thumbup1: It's best just to leave her alone with access to toys and art supplies. It's truly amazing what she comes up with. She also loves cats and has read everything in the library about them, multiple times. Other than that, she's just a little kid, hanging out. Rebecca is heavily into gymnastics, but lots of other things capture her interest, like different science topics.

[Chrysalis Academy]

This thread is totally cracking me up. I have had each and every one of these feelings at some point! My dd has a passionate and abiding interest in horses. Which is great and all, but how many horse-related papers can you assign? And she's read all the horse books in the library, and done WP's Equine science. She just did a horse camp last week. She takes as many riding lessons as I can afford and worked out a deal with the local stable to work in exchange for a lesson a month. So, I think we got that interest covered . . . :lol:

 

Other than horses, she has a ton of interests that she pursues on her own time, most recently teaching herself to knit and crochet. She really wants to get into digital filmmaking, but I can't afford a camera right now, maybe at birthday/XMas time. She's getting to the point where her interests are costing me a lot of $$$ :toetap05: or would if I had any!!

 

But not so much with the academic interests. She is pretty much happy to study whatever I say, or read whatever I assign, but hasn't developed any academic "passions" or subjects she really wants to delve into and learn more about. I would love to make schoolwork more delight-directed, but until something bubbles up, I keep assigning stuff and she keeps doing it fairly cheerfully. I'm *willing* to make content subjects more interest-driven, but she's gotta work with me, you know?

[madteaparty]

Corraleno, we do all that. We garden each weekend, go to museums and field trips, did a mushroom innoculation recently, etc. He tags along, and enjoys, to a certain extent, but not sufficiently to pick a book or do google searches to further learnt he topic.

 

Someone mentioned imaginative play: Ah yes, he has a group of about 30 lego guys dressed and armoured particularly, and they do battle frequently, emmiting only battle sounds.

[Corraleno]

So, is the problem that you are wanting him to take these things further in a specifically "schooly" way — reading, research, experiments — or just that he never takes anything further in any way? Public school may have a LOT to do with why he currently doesn't want to add reading or research to "fun" activities — that can (and should) change once he's homeschooled.

 

With the lego guys.... is he interested in ancient or medieval warfare? An interest in ancient warfare at the age of 10 or 11 ultimately sparked a passion for Greek history, language, and literature that totally changed DS's life. There are tons of great resources for those areas, many of which are fun and very hands-on and educational without seeming "schooly."

 

Do you have an iPad? There is free software for making stop-action lego movies; it's very easy to use and both my kids were really into that for a while. DS and his friends also used Comic Life software to make comics based on photos of lego minifies in various settings; they would come up with the plot, build the figures & sets, photograph each panel, import, and add text.

 

Does he like board games? Has he tried chess or Mastermind? If he likes swashbuckling and sword fighting, would he be interested in trying fencing (if there's a club near you)? Or other martial arts?

 

Anyway, I wouldn't write him off as having no interests until he's been homeschooled for a while. It can take a year or so for kids to really "deschool" and get into the idea of reading and learning about things just for pleasure, and not because they "have to."

 

Jackie

[madteaparty]

Corraleno, the latter. He is exposed to all sorts of things, but it's always us scheduing.He plays chess because I enrolled him in chess class., on and on like that. I'm comforted by your thoughts that it may just be school for now. I could see where he gets mixed messages: he is at the very top of his class without lifting a finger (have to attend principal honor roll ceremony tomorrow) and so why do anything more? Thanks very much for your posts.

[duckens]

Madteaparty says:

Reading the projects based thread. I would totally be on board with interest-led approaches, but a prerequisite is the interest, no? Is it just me that has the world's only not really interested or curious in anything 9 year old?

 

This sounds like Loverboy's description of himself as a kid. (Loverboy was not homeschooled.)

 

His mother tried to put him in different sports, and she encouraged piano/music lessons and drama. He became an Eagle Scout (just as his brothers did, too). He just had no passion for anything other than hiding in his bedroom closet, breaking open batteries or (using fire) to melt the copper off pennies. :ohmy:

 

Loverboy turned out okay. He earned a PhD in science from one of the top colleges in his field.

 

I think some kids are just late bloomers. And I think that some kids just need to be exposed to a lot of things before they find what clicks for them.

 

Offer some "electives" and let him pick one. Try this thread. By the end of a semester, he will either want to learn more, or try something different. Either outcome is fine.

 

FTR, I have given dd6 choices of Unit Studies for the past two semesters. (Apple Tree Farm, then Adventures at Sea). Adventures at Sea was her favorite subject this past semester, and she learned a ton, but is ready to do something different.

 

Now she is chomping at the bit for autumn's Dinosaur Curriculum. She wrote a note declaring her boycott from piano until I found the curriculum, and she has already begged two lessons from me since I found it a week ago.

[J-rap]

I think at that age, a lot of kids don't have clear interests yet! I would just expose him to a variety of things. Summertime is a good time to do that, because there are often inexpensive community ed activities: casual sports, theater, music, computer projects, nature hikes, etc. I figure at that age, my job was to expose them to a multitude of things, and over time they seem to latch on to certain things.

[ElizabethB]

Lego technic is good for playing and learning about gears and other mechanical things. My husband now has an interested party to talk to about gear ratios, I used to have to suffer through such discussions, now he has someone who actually cares!

 

Get a few different models and some of the Lego technic idea books. I got this book for my husband (it scares me) but it was totally unnecessary, my husband can explain it all without the book. My son might get some use out of it when he is older.

 

http://www.amazon.com/Unofficial-LEGO-Technic-Builders-Guide/dp/1593274343/ref=sr_1_2?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1372112906&sr=1-2&keywords=Lego+technic

[Elfknitter.#]

To be clear: We do not homeschool yet, only afterschool. He reads books I assign, when left to his own devides he would pick something like "My Weird School" (yes, even at 9).

He obtained the highest grades/honor roll at his current mediocre urban public school, he is not going back next fall.

I've experimented with a less structured approach, as in "Do a couple of pages of math and I'll check when I wake from my nap" or some such. Do you know what he did? Skipped the parts of the book where perfect squares are taught to reach 2x2 and 5x5, did that part ONLY, and proudly announced that oddly, math was easy today.

If bored, he picks up the ipad and plays dragonvale or minecraft or smurfvillage. Yes, he has been exposed to Scratch, etc. Oh, just revoke my membership already...

 

Sounds to me as if he did follow his interest.

 

I think at that age, a lot of kids don't have clear interests yet! I would just expose him to a variety of things. Summertime is a good time to do that, because there are often inexpensive community ed activities: casual sports, theater, music, computer projects, nature hikes, etc. I figure at that age, my job was to expose them to a multitude of things, and over time they seem to latch on to certain things.

 

Exactly.

 

Plus, you mentioned he's just finished schooling for the year? He needs sometime for decompression before you worry about schooling- interest-led or else wise.

[Rivka]

I think it's unrealistic to expect that a kid who goes to school all day and then comes home and afterschools will also choose to pursue improving educational projects in his free time. He's a kid. After all those academics, of course he wants to relax and play.

[Ellie]

Sometimes it appears that children have no interests of their own because their minds are stuffed with the things that other people are requiring them to learn. They need mass amounts of time so they can get bored and their own interests bubble up. :-) They might need to have limited access to screens, and they might need to stay home--no co-ops, minimal group activities--and spend more time with the family.

 

Even if you do project-led learning, you might have to do some gentle directing in the beginning, or, if not actual directing, provide some *gentle* exposure to things *you* think are interesting. And you have to do it without pressure, without showing any exasperation because your dc didn't latch on to it.

[madteaparty]

I think it's unrealistic to expect that a kid who goes to school all day and then comes home and afterschools will also choose to pursue improving educational projects in his free time. He's a kid. After all those academics, of course he wants to relax and play.

 

This (and the post after it about him doing what is required of him all day) could well be it. I am going to let him decompress for 4 weeks or so this summer before we start homeschooling. Thanks