Handme down books and curriculum

[km123175]

Does anyone else feel bad for the 2nd and 3rd children that they always get handme downs?

 

I'm just finishing up planning for the next school year (starts in July) and I've realized that I am reusing all of my previous curriculum purchases - that's the point right get good stuff and reuse with littler ones as they come through - but those pour darlings miss all the fun of getting big boxes of stuff that's pretty much just for them.

 

The biggest reason this is sad for me is that my middle child feels most loved when she gets gifts and touches. I guess extra cuddles are in order for all of the books that will be arriving in our home as soon as I click "checkout" on several websites.

[happypamama]

Can you get one or two things that are especially for the younger children? My 4yo was so thrilled to get a set of workbooks that are just for him (each of his older siblings had the same set, but since they're consumable, each child gets his/her own set at the appropriate age).

 

Around here, it helps that we didn't start WWE until this school year, so WWE3, which DS1 will use next year, is something his older sister never used. Also, they have different skills, so their math programs are very different, so DS1 gets new stuff (actually, in that case, *he* gets new stuff because his Singapore is consumable workbooks, but DD gets used because she uses Saxon, which is not consumable).

 

I remember lamenting this fact, though, back when I had only two children -- it didn't seem fair that DD got all the really cool toys new, and the younger one(s) would get to play with hand-me-downs. Our second is a boy, so the toys were a bit different, but a friend reminded me that second and subsequent children may get some hand-me-downs, but they also get parents who are broken in a bit and more relaxed (not to mention older siblings), so they're getting the good end of the deal in a different way.

[5wolfcubs]

Does anyone else feel bad for the 2nd and 3rd children that they always get handme downs?

 

At my house the person I feel sorry for is ME because I don't want to go through said curriculum AGAIN! I skipped First Language Lessons when ds7 was in 1st grade because I just couldn't do it a 5th time! However, the workbook I picked for him was pretty lousy, so I'm using FLL at double speed this year! For the 5th time!

 

However, given that your middle dd appreciates gifts I'd order a couple things new -- like Dover coloring books!

[boscopup]

So far, my younger kids still have something to look forward to, as I have to replace any workbooks we use (math, spelling, handwriting). Just last week, we got my youngest's K math workbooks and a handwriting workbook (he asked for it!). I also sometimes get little books for them to read, and my youngest gets various coloring books, activity books, or workbooks (my friend gave me some that she got used - they're new to my 3 year old! :D).

 

Really though, like a PP said, the younger ones have other advantages that the oldest didn't have, so I don't worry about what they feel about getting handmedowns. In fact, they usually think it's cool that they get to wear the shoes that DS1 wore or they finally get that cool Lego Star Wars shirt that he's outgrown. :D

 

I also may not reuse everything. Sometimes, it just makes sense to use something different, or *I* am bored and want to use something different.

 

You could put handmedown curriculum in a box and leave it somewhere for your DD to open at the beginning of the year? You could make it a special time, even if it's stuff you already had. :) I keep stuff I'm not using in a closet, so my kids don't even know it's there. When I pull out FLL1 and WWE1 this summer for DS2, he won't have seen them since he was 4, and he certainly won't remember having seen them.

[Spetzi]

I understand. Although I've made some changes for child #4 as she has her own style which is different from the other kids.

 

If you want some special things, do some new science activities or lapbooks (free or cheap online) add in some videos (library or online) that hit the mark with her.

 

My kids love choosing school supplies so she might be thrilled to pick out some pencils, cool eraser and a nice case (or the like.).

 

Neither of my suggestions replace that big box of books, but they might help.

[alisoncooks]

Well, could you box up any grade level specific items (that aren't shared between them all) to make them special when you show them to those younger dear children?

 

I sort of know how you feel. For oldest DD we had a big box Kindergarten curriculum. It was full of awesome. But I didn't like it and got rid of it when we were halfway through, decided to do our own thing. So now that younger is ready for Kinder, we're just using a couple of workbooks. No box of Awesome. :( (I told DH this was part of my reason for choosing uber-expensive Nancy Larson science for this year -- wanted younger DD to have something fun like that!)

[trudence1]

There are usually a couple new things each year for the youngest one. I have found that she LOVES to use the older boys books, it makes her feel grownup to be using what she remembers them using...we will how long that lasts.

[Holly]

I like to add extras for my younger ones...even if it's just art/school supplies, a workbook, or a fun game or puzzle. Usually for the younger grades I pick up a math workbook and phonics workbook. I've also found they are excited to use their big siblings books...I just pulled out LHTH for my 3yo and while the books are falling apart, she couldn't care less! She loves having her own school time.

 

I'm also guilty of buying curriculum because I get tired of teaching it over and over and over again. That's why we have two completely re-usable preschool curriculums and five different K math programs. :leaving:

[Kathryn]

No. I know a lot of people feel sorry for younger children getting hand-me-downs, but I really don't get that outlook. My children are lucky to have what they have, whether it be new or used (by an older sibling, friend, or stranger). I can't at all understand the attitude that each child is entitled to brand new everything. We have thousands of books. I buy the vast majority of them used and when lining the shelves with next year's school books, most of them I already owned because I pick things up here and there. So, my oldest doesn't even get a brand new shiny box of books.

[ebrindam]

I would definitely make it a point to get each child some of his or her own NEW things every year. Colorful workbooks, new manipulatives...something. I think it would be no fun at all to always get hand me downs IF someone else is always getting new.

[threedogfarm]

Hmmmm. . .when my children go to the post office with me and there's a package, they definitely get excited. When they hear it's for homeschooling, their interest dies right there. I mean, how exciting is it to open a box of Singapore books or WWE (sorry SWB!)?

 

So, for us, I do not feel bad about the younger child not getting the big box--they're just not interested! Then again, I don't hear any complaints when ski equipment, etc. is handed down either.

 

However, I do feel bad for 5WolfCubs to be going through the curriculum for the 5th time!!!! Wow.

[Walking-Iris]

I actually look at my curriculum with an eye towards using it with different age children and subsequent years. I don't want to buy the basics for each child every year. I have a strict homeschool budget and it was really nice this year to buy some extra fun things (for history and science) that I wouldn't have bought if I had basic 3 r's to buy.

 

Other than things that I use that are consumable, I don't worry about the hand me down curriculum. I'll make anything work. Only if something is truly awful and a drag will I drop it and find something else. That's just me wanting to save money in the long term. Before I buy anything my dh and I seriously weigh it's current price with the savings in the long term if I continue to use this book or program when my youngest is ready for it. It's price tag is also weighed on how complementary it is to something already on the shelf. Therefore, spontaneous curriculum hopping is a big no-no. I definitely don't try things just because I want to. I didn't have any history for my oldest for a few years because I wanted to be absolutely sure on my purchase.

 

Getting new consumable workbooks help to make the children feel special. Also school supplies. Their own pens and pencils and paper and art supplies etc. I also play up projects and hands on activities. Because of my spread each child feels as though they have their own stuff anyway.

 

I also don't feel (yet anyway) bored with doing the same thing each year. Whatever I do with my oldest always feels new. He's the only one getting completely new stuff each year. I supplement and tweak lesson presentations for each kid's personality, so it feels different. Anyhow, to me, curriculum are my goals, not the resources I use to reach those goals.

[acsnmama]

No. I know a lot of people feel sorry for younger children getting hand-me-downs, but I really don't get that outlook. My children are lucky to have what they have, whether it be new or used (by an older sibling, friend, or stranger). I can't at all understand the attitude that each child is entitled to brand new everything. We have thousands of books. I buy the vast majority of them used and when lining the shelves with next year's school books, most of them I already owned because I pick things up here and there. So, my oldest doesn't even get a brand new shiny box of books.

 

I agree. For us though, since I have boy, girl, boy, I buy them each their own clothing, etc. I don't hold onto clothing from my oldest boy for my youngest boy since they are 5 years apart. With school items on the other hand, it's not really presented as, "this is for so-and-so" it's more or less, "look at all the new school items I bought for all of you to use!"

 

I've never viewed homeschool items at hand-me-downs. In fact, I think it's much easier, aside from the fact of having to go through the same routine over again, I think it's actually a GOOD thing to re-use curriculum! If you purchase great curriculum to educate your first child and pass it down to the next, than you can feel confident that they're all getting a good education. I do feel it's important to find what works for your child, but to purchase different or new curriculum for each one, just to avoid the idea of "hand-me-downs" can get very expensive and isn't necessary!

 

 

I like some of the ideas here though, to purchase maybe a extra fun workbook outside of the curriculum, just for each child if that will make you feel better.

[Arcadia]

Textbooks are shared unless they need to write in them since my boys are a year apart and I am not particular about grade levels. They have their own workbooks which they happily personalised. They have their own stationary supplies and geometry sets. The only hand me downs my younger get is clothes because older outgrew some too fast. He gets his own new clothes too so he has the biggest wardrobe.They pick their own science references :)

[Alte Veste Academy]

:lol: My older kids are enormously jealous of my youngest because he gets to write in ALL the Singapore books.

 

We are not box people. When a box comes, it almost always has a mix of resources. We do content work together so resources are selected to represent the mix of levels here. When I order books, there are some for all of us to share (spines, read-alouds, and references) and some hand-selected to be at the right reading and interest level for each of the kids. Everyone gets fresh school supplies as needed. There is enough newness here that I don't think it would occur to anyone to be upset about everything not being new. Although, now that I think of it, there was a bit of drama about the condition of the Beast Academy guides, which have been so well-loved that they were taken to bed, sat on, slept on... Wish I could have bought those in hardcover. MCTLA too, although those are still in pretty good shape.

[8filltheheart]

LOL, ummmm, no. It wouldn't even cross my mind. ;) We use mostly non-consumable whole books, many being OOP books purchased used and beaten up to begin with. :)

 

FWIW, I typically buy them new mechanical pencils or cute #2s (depends on the age), new composition books or folders/notebooks, new colored pencils/markers/crayons at the beginning of the yr. They love getting their new supplies and those are theirs. The older kids also get new lesson planners.

 

Books themselves are treasures and old friends. We don't judge them by their dents and wrinkles but on what they contain inside. :)

[lillybell]

I buy mostly used online and at used bookstores. The packages that come in the mail, I open so they don't get to open anything. I am the one who gets to be excited. The only curriculum that I buy new are consumable workbooks and even those, I open and stick on my curriculum shelf. If they want to be excited, they can go stare at the curriculum shelf but something tells me that they avoid that area like the plague. They see new books on the shelf and they cringe and whisper among-st each other "Do you think she added those for me or for you".

[mommaduck]

There is no reason to feel badly. Gift her things that can be added to what you have. Books, manipulatives, games, etc.

[km123175]

Thanks guys. We have one Sonlight order coming (with LOTS of books) and most of them will actually be used by the entire family as we do the hstory readings and read alouds. I just looked at that sticker price and was thinkinga bout the fact that the ONLY reason I'm buying that whole set is because it completely fits my oldest daughter's way of learning.

 

We're doing physics next year, which I expect the 8 year old to "learn" and the other 2 kids to play and explore; I specifically picked the set that I did because it already has lots of hands on things in the kits and boxes. My oldest asked "can I just read and write things to learn instead of doing activities." ;)

 

I'm also going to be doing Miquon for the 3 of them (at different paces, but starting out together); so, those will be shiny new books (we already have the rods).

 

So, you're all right, most of our materials and supplies are family shared things, but I was probably feeling a little guilty that the big ticket item was chosen with the oldest in mind.

 

The problem with boxing up her 1st grade curriculum is that we school year-round; so, we just move on to the next thing as we go and we're already using some materials that are hers for 1st grade. :)

 

It's all good. Just a little hyper senstive for that pricetag on Sonlight's website last night. ;)

[Murphy101]

Do I feel bad for them? Absolutely not at all.

 

Why?

 

1. It means we have money for other things for them that we had to spend on book for their older siblings.

 

2. It means mom isn't stressed looking for the right thing, finding she was wrong and starting again.

 

3. After about the third kid, I feel it is either so used or so dated, that unlike the previous kids, that third or fourth user gets to write in it. And the older siblings look on in envy. ;p

 

4. They are always excited bc I keep what they aren't using set aside, so it's fun to see me start pulling stuff out.

 

5. They are more confident bc they know if older siblings got through it, then even when it seems really hard, so an they. And if makes they puff with price when an older sibling says they remember that and really liked x or slaps a bro on the shoulder and comment that they are going to learn a lot from that program.

 

6. I always try to tweak things some for each child. If nothing else, I make sure the reading list is one they will enjoy. But I do try to ask every year what 3 things they would like to learn or do. Sometimes I can't do it. (Swimming has consistently been on some kids list every year but swimming is INSANE expensive here. I just can't afford it. :( ) But I have always been able to swing at least 1 of the 3 requests.

[texasmama]

It doesn't bother me, nor does it seem to bother my kids. However, I have felt badly for my youngest son who gets to wear a lot of his brother's hand me down clothes. I do make a point to buy him his own clothing just because of this. I don't even know if it bothers the child, but it bothers me!