Laura Corin Posted June 7, 2012 Share Posted June 7, 2012 Google is telling me that a few days is normal in the US - is that your experience? FIL is under final hospice care in Texas and we are trying to work out flights. There's often a much longer gap in the UK - for my father it was at least ten days. Perhaps open casket is less common here? Thanks Laura Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MomatHWTK Posted June 7, 2012 Share Posted June 7, 2012 They usually try to hold things until family can arrive. But a few days is the common time frame. I'm sorry for your family. I know it is stressful to have to try to work out details long distance. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MariannNOVA Posted June 7, 2012 Share Posted June 7, 2012 (edited) Assuming that there are no holidays coming up (we have seen Good Friday- combined with other issues - delay a funeral for 5 days), generally, I haven't seen a delay longer than 2 or 3 days. Weekends will impact the time frame as well. I hope you can work this all out smoothly.:grouphug::grouphug: ETA: If there is only going to be one day of viewing prior to the funeral, I tend to see a longer amount of time between the day of the person's death and the day of viewing -- lots of people where I grew up RELY on the obits in the newspaper and an extra couple of days if there is just a one day viewing, makes a huge difference. If I recall, my grandmother passed on a Saturday evening and the one and only day of viewing was the following Wednesday. It gave relatives time to get to NJ from Florida. Edited June 7, 2012 by MariannNOVA Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hwin Posted June 7, 2012 Share Posted June 7, 2012 I've heard of a 7 day delay but it was odd enough that we were all talking about it here at work. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
FaithManor Posted June 7, 2012 Share Posted June 7, 2012 :grouphug: 3 days, unless there is a holiday or significant complication for family, is the norm here. Faith Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Laura Corin Posted June 7, 2012 Author Share Posted June 7, 2012 That helps us with our planning. Laura Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rebel Yell Posted June 7, 2012 Share Posted June 7, 2012 :grouphug: and peace to your family, and comfort for him at the end of this road. 1-3 days is usual here, depending on time of death. Up to a week isn't unheard of if close family needs to travel from far away- but 5 days would be more typical even for that. I have seen longer waits before the viewing/services if there was only going to be 1 day of visitation before the service/burial. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
catz Posted June 7, 2012 Share Posted June 7, 2012 Maybe this is unusual, but 5 to 7+ days isn't uncommon in my world. I think we did my grandmothers funeral 8 days later. A local family lost a child recently and the funeral is 7 days after. :crying: More people I know are being cremated too. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
brett_ashley Posted June 7, 2012 Share Posted June 7, 2012 among our black friends 7-9 days is common. Among our white friends 2-4 days is common. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
prairiewindmomma Posted June 7, 2012 Share Posted June 7, 2012 We just went to a funeral where there was a two week delay because of the need for extended family long distance travel....with an open casket viewing. Generally speaking, that kind of delay is not advisable. Some medications interfere with efforts at preservation... Generally, here, there's a day or two to care for the body, an evening of visitation followed by the funeral and interment the next day. I'm sorry to hear that your FIL has taken so ill. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tiberia Posted June 7, 2012 Share Posted June 7, 2012 We waited 2 weeks after my mom's death to have the funeral. The mortuary said the wait was not a problem, and we did have a viewing and open casket. We waited because we already had a family reunion planned, and everyone was coming to say goodbye to mom, including family in Europe. She just died sooner than expected. It also gave time for some elderly, out of state relatives to make plans and attend the service. Sorry for your loss. Joann Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Big Buckin' Longhorn Posted June 7, 2012 Share Posted June 7, 2012 among our black friends 7-9 days is common. Among our white friends 2-4 days is common. :iagree: I'm black and I can safely say up to a two week delay is not abnormal to allow extended family to arrive if necessary. Of course, it may just be my family. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
EmilyK Posted June 9, 2012 Share Posted June 9, 2012 Maybe this is unusual, but 5 to 7+ days isn't uncommon in my world. I think we did my grandmothers funeral 8 days later. A local family lost a child recently and the funeral is 7 days after. :crying: More people I know are being cremated too. I think it really depends on so many factors, including religious ones. Aside from my Jewish friends and relatives, where there is a religious reason to bury quickly, most folks I know wait quite a while, especially when the person is older. Most people where I live cremate and have a memorial service sometimes weeks later. But it totally depends. My grandmothers were in a different part of the country, both buried, but there was a desire to have the whole family gathered, so it was done with enough lag time to get everyone there, maybe a week. There are so many variables and regional and other subcultures here I think it is impossible to assume without asking, or knowing the family. Is there a way you could ask the person(s) who will be deciding? I can't imagine planning a funeral without making sure I was leaving enough time for children and grandchildren to arrive, without a religious reason. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Laura Corin Posted June 9, 2012 Author Share Posted June 9, 2012 Thanks for your help. The funeral is taking place quickly; Husband has arranged to spend ten days in Dallas to tie up loose ends, and see family and friends. Laura Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jennsmile Posted June 9, 2012 Share Posted June 9, 2012 When my brother passed it was Sunday evening till Saturday funeral. He died in MO and we had to wait while he was embalmed then he was transfered to TX via an my parents SUV to the funeral home down here. Then viewing on Friday. Funeral on Sat. When my Grandma died on Christmas it was New Years Eve for her funeral and that was tricky with weekends and holidays. Not to mention us traveling by car avoiding snow storms and traveling home. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DawnM Posted June 9, 2012 Share Posted June 9, 2012 My aunt died on Monday and the funeral was Friday.....so, 4 days after death. I think that is fairly typical. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mumto2 Posted June 9, 2012 Share Posted June 9, 2012 (edited) When my father died we waited almost 3 weeks. My mom was recovering from a mastectomy 2 days previously. She simply was not up to anything. My brothers and I needed to catch our breath. Both parents really ill at once was awful. I was told we could wait longer and still have an open casket. We didn't --but my brothers did have the casket opened and apparently he looked good. This was in US. I think the big difference between the UK and US is in the US the day and time of the funeral is decided and published within a day or two of the death and in the UK no one knows when the funeral will be for at least a week-- the coroners report takes at least that long where we are. Until that is sorted no plans can happen. It puts the whole family and friends in an odd waiting period which doesn't happen in the US. :grouphug::grouphug::grouphug: Edited June 9, 2012 by sawuk addition Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Farrar Posted June 9, 2012 Share Posted June 9, 2012 I know of a funeral that was held 5 months later. The loved one had been cremated and they decided to wait until it was convenient for family members from all over the country. The question has been resolved though, I suppose. Sorry for your loss, Laura. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Farrar Posted June 9, 2012 Share Posted June 9, 2012 I know of a funeral that was held 5 months later. The loved one had been cremated and they decided to wait until it was convenient for family members from all over the country. The question has been resolved though, I suppose. Sorry for your loss, Laura. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
krisperry Posted June 10, 2012 Share Posted June 10, 2012 among our black friends 7-9 days is common. Among our white friends 2-4 days is common. This. I'm white and my husband, black. The funerals for our families have had distinctly different time lines. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
UmMusa Posted June 10, 2012 Share Posted June 10, 2012 Wow, this is so different from my experience. Muslims bury the next day, usually. Two days maximum under circumstances. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Join the conversation
You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.