JennifersLost Posted March 29, 2012 Share Posted March 29, 2012 To say I'm tightly wound is an understatement and I go through life almost holding my breath (and clenching every muscle in my neck and shoulders) until everything is done and perfect. Of course nothing is ever done or perfect. (BTW - I'm post-homeschooling, so this is about work/cleaning/$/parenting/life rather than school/curriculum probs) If I actually get today's work done, I start worrying about tomorrow's work. If I solve one problem, I start fixating on the next. I have always been like this. It probably makes me a good entrepreneur, but I'm beginning to worry that I'm going to have a heart attack one of these days. Please - give me your best relaxation techniques that don't involve eating large bags of doritos! And please address how you make the switch - how do you walk away from the work and have fun/take a break/etc. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jean in Newcastle Posted March 29, 2012 Share Posted March 29, 2012 I'll be watching this thread because I want to know too. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hedgehog Posted March 29, 2012 Share Posted March 29, 2012 :bigear: I have anxiety and I'm just starting therapy for it so I don't have much in the way of suggestions for you.. except that after two sessions I am already feeling a little better for it. I'll be interested to read what suggestions you get. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LG Gone Wild Posted March 29, 2012 Share Posted March 29, 2012 Are you sleeping? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
swellmomma Posted March 29, 2012 Share Posted March 29, 2012 SEX There I said it. I never get any with another person. But the fact is, it is a great natural relaxer and kicks out a bunch of endorphins that make you feel good (and burns calories too unlike those doritoes) So jump you husband tonight and get it on... I mean make teA ETA obviously this won't fix the issue in the moment, just make it easier to relax at the end of the night and sleep well Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CalicoKat Posted March 29, 2012 Share Posted March 29, 2012 To say I'm tightly wound is an understatement and I go through life almost holding my breath (and clenching every muscle in my neck and shoulders) until everything is done and perfect. Of course nothing is ever done or perfect. (BTW - I'm post-homeschooling, so this is about work/cleaning/$/parenting/life rather than school/curriculum probs) If I actually get today's work done, I start worrying about tomorrow's work. If I solve one problem, I start fixating on the next. I have always been like this. It probably makes me a good entrepreneur, but I'm beginning to worry that I'm going to have a heart attack one of these days. Please - give me your best relaxation techniques that don't involve eating large bags of doritos! And please address how you make the switch - how do you walk away from the work and have fun/take a break/etc. My relaxation is exercise. I swim or I walk on the treadmill at the Y. I didn't have this a year a go. It's new for me. I get to get in my car and drive away from the house and just do something different for a while, for me. I sleep better as a result and I'm better prepared for the rest of the crap. Something about pushing yourself to do more, faster, harder is what I'm finding mentally relaxing. :D Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Night Elf Posted March 29, 2012 Share Posted March 29, 2012 Are you a perfectionist? You could try googling for 'curing perfectionism'. Maybe if you found a way to let go of the idea of perfection, you wouldn't feel so tightly wound? I'm not a perfectionist, but I am a worrier and carry the stress in my shoulders since they are always hunched up around my ears. DH massages my neck and shoulders. Hot baths with a glass of wine is lovely too. Sometimes I leave the house and go do something on my own that isn't a household necessity. I don't consider grocery shopping to be relaxing. However, I don't mind wandering around Walmart just browsing. Browsing a Barnes & Noble with a Starbucks coffee is also lovely. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JennifersLost Posted March 30, 2012 Author Share Posted March 30, 2012 SEX There I said it. I never get any with another person. But the fact is, it is a great natural relaxer and kicks out a bunch of endorphins that make you feel good (and burns calories too unlike those doritoes) So jump you husband tonight and get it on... I mean make teA ETA obviously this won't fix the issue in the moment, just make it easier to relax at the end of the night and sleep well Okay - terrific. Now how do I make the transition. Because otherwise, I'm figuring out word counts and assigning narrators to projects and calculating how much money I have left in my budget for groceries instead of....well, you know....:) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JennifersLost Posted March 30, 2012 Author Share Posted March 30, 2012 Are you a perfectionist? You could try googling for 'curing perfectionism'. Maybe if you found a way to let go of the idea of perfection, you wouldn't feel so tightly wound? There's a CURE for perfectionism? Now....would I be able to cure myself perfectly????? I'll check that out. That's definitely part of the problem. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JennifersLost Posted March 30, 2012 Author Share Posted March 30, 2012 To answer the other posters, I do deal with anxiety issues. Or rather, I have them, but I don't deal with them. I am sleeping - I take melatonin every night. If I don't, I wouldn't sleep for hours. Exercise probably is the answer. Again, it's allowing myself to transition to it. I feel like I'm completely blocked right now. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ssavings Posted March 30, 2012 Share Posted March 30, 2012 Watching for advice... No suggestions, but :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
UmMusa Posted March 30, 2012 Share Posted March 30, 2012 How about scheduling into your day at first, so that you get used to it. The tEA, that is. Or exercise. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
swellmomma Posted March 30, 2012 Share Posted March 30, 2012 Okay - terrific. Now how do I make the transition. Because otherwise, I'm figuring out word counts and assigning narrators to projects and calculating how much money I have left in my budget for groceries instead of....well, you know....:) alcohol :lol: corrupting 1 hive member at a time Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LG Gone Wild Posted March 30, 2012 Share Posted March 30, 2012 To answer the other posters, I do deal with anxiety issues. Or rather, I have them, but I don't deal with them. I am sleeping - I take melatonin every night. If I don't, I wouldn't sleep for hours. Exercise probably is the answer. Again, it's allowing myself to transition to it. I feel like I'm completely blocked right now. Put on some running shoes and head out the door. I don't actually like running at all but I love putting on my headphones and shaking it all out BY MYSELF. In fact, I think I will go for a run tomorrow morning. Also, I take some adrenal stress support supplement. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hoggirl Posted March 30, 2012 Share Posted March 30, 2012 alcohol :lol: corrupting 1 hive member at a time Jack Daniels, specifically. At least, that's what works for me :D. Sorry. Not trying to make light of your situation. I know what you mean. I am RARELY relaxed. I seem to have success while on vacation but, unfortunately, that is only a temporary solution. I hope you find something that helps you. :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
justamouse Posted March 30, 2012 Share Posted March 30, 2012 To answer the other posters, I do deal with anxiety issues. Or rather, I have them, but I don't deal with them. I am sleeping - I take melatonin every night. If I don't, I wouldn't sleep for hours. Exercise probably is the answer. Again, it's allowing myself to transition to it. I feel like I'm completely blocked right now. How did you transition from mom to writer? Music, a certain ritual, a time of day? And it's not going to happen over night, it's going to take time. I swear by walking. It's easy on the joints, even when it's crappy out, it still makes you feel good. Then come in, have a glass of wine, and read something for FUN. That you like. Or, if you have to get away from fiction, and you start analyzing movies for character development (hee) take up painting, and start thinking about line, form and shadow. KNit. Crochet. Something. :001_smile: THEN you have teA and make yourself comatose. :D I don't know, I'm just throwing stuff out there to help you think about ritualizing something for yourself. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Coffeetime Posted March 30, 2012 Share Posted March 30, 2012 SEX I mean make teA ETA obviously this won't fix the issue in the moment, just make it easier to relax at the end of the night and sleep well alcohol :lol: corrupting 1 hive member at a time :lol::lol::lol: Seriously, Exercise! Hard. You sound a lot like me. I run. It's the best stress relief I have found. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rhreinke Posted March 30, 2012 Share Posted March 30, 2012 I know it can be difficult. Here are some things that help me. I always feel better when I'm out in nature, specifically trees and the forest. Take a walk, jog or even a sprint if needed. Also, taking a warm bath in the evening before bed with a cup of tea. And yes, at times a bath with a glass of good red wine These are just a few ideas. I hope it helps. A while back I started doing a 15 min. pilates video in the evening after dinner. AM/PM Gaiam Pilates with Anna Caban is really effective at relieving stress and relaxing me at night in order to sleep well. I also found I was more flexible or for your purpose not all tied up in knots. I was doing it about 3 to 4 times a week and I noticed my stress was more manageable. But in the end red wine is great as well :001_smile: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JennifersLost Posted March 30, 2012 Author Share Posted March 30, 2012 You guys are cracking me up. Confession: I did the alcohol thing. Overall I don't drink much - I go for months (even years) without any alcohol at ALL. Last year I decided that a shot or two on a Saturday night was no big deal (for this very reason - I was so stressed I couldn't even relax on the weekends). It was great for awhile. I was able to laugh, forget all about being self-employed.... Then suddenly it stopped working. I think I built up a tolerance, so I started feeling sick before I ever felt a buzz. I stopped drinking at all for about six months. Actually, more like 9 months. Now alcohol does nothing. Nothing at all. I can drink several "real" drinks and I don't feel buzzed or anything except sick. It doesn't relax me at all, doesn't make me happy or anything. I'm afraid to go to the doctor and ask what's up. Even if it was a tolerance thing, you'd think that taking half a year off would "reset" me, right? Maybe my liver just gave up the ghost? Okay, exercise it is. Now I need a goal. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MomatHWTK Posted March 30, 2012 Share Posted March 30, 2012 I take an ADHD medication. It has made a huge difference. Sometimes I can actually fall asleep at night. Before I would be up all hours worrying and fussing over things that really didn't need nearly that much attention. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Coffeetime Posted March 30, 2012 Share Posted March 30, 2012 You guys are cracking me up. Confession: I did the alcohol thing. Overall I don't drink much - I go for months (even years) without any alcohol at ALL. Last year I decided that a shot or two on a Saturday night was no big deal (for this very reason - I was so stressed I couldn't even relax on the weekends). It was great for awhile. I was able to laugh, forget all about being self-employed.... Then suddenly it stopped working. I think I built up a tolerance, so I started feeling sick before I ever felt a buzz. I stopped drinking at all for about six months. Actually, more like 9 months. Now alcohol does nothing. Nothing at all. I can drink several "real" drinks and I don't feel buzzed or anything except sick. It doesn't relax me at all, doesn't make me happy or anything. I'm afraid to go to the doctor and ask what's up. Even if it was a tolerance thing, you'd think that taking half a year off would "reset" me, right? Maybe my liver just gave up the ghost? Okay, exercise it is. Now I need a goal. Have you tried wine instead of liquor? Wine puts me TO SLEEP. Liquor or mixed drinks are totally different and don't make me sleepy at all. I have no idea why... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
3browneyedboys4me Posted March 30, 2012 Share Posted March 30, 2012 Xanax!!:D:D seriously....xanax! :tongue_smilie: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JennifersLost Posted March 30, 2012 Author Share Posted March 30, 2012 Wine gives me a headache, so I steer clear of it. Now I'm sitting here thinking, if the choices are exercise or Xanax, maybe I can find it in me to exercise more. I have a complete phobia about taking drugs of any kind. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
UmMusa Posted March 30, 2012 Share Posted March 30, 2012 Or try 5HTP like I did a couple of months ago. It boosts serotonin which has helped me with my monstrous PMS. It could help you chill. It's not a drug and has no side effects for me although I've heard it makes some people sleepy. I take 50 mg when I wake up on empty stomach, then I drink my coffee. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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