kiana Posted January 11, 2012 Share Posted January 11, 2012 This is true. It's the horror stories we hear about (and, IMO, they get exaggerated). CPS, in general and as a rule, prefers to keep families together and get them help. The kids' families I counseled last year typically had numerous chances to avail themselves to resources before the kids were removed. I did not come across one random, "take the kids" situation. Yes. I'm vaguely involved in a situation now where they're trying very hard to shift custody from one parent to another. I have to say that given the full details ... the only thing I find horrifying is that they're not moving faster. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
QuirkyKapers Posted January 11, 2012 Share Posted January 11, 2012 Good for you that you transcended your fear and called. My prayer is the family gets the help they all might need. :iagree: I know that I wouldn't have wanted to make the call and would have been nervous as well. :grouphug: Glad you followed your gut. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
swellmomma Posted January 11, 2012 Share Posted January 11, 2012 This is true. It's the horror stories we hear about (and, IMO, they get exaggerated). CPS, in general and as a rule, prefers to keep families together and get them help. The kids' families I counseled last year typically had numerous chances to avail themselves to resources before the kids were removed. I did not come across one random, "take the kids" situation. SOmetimes sure but my own horror of dealing with CPS for a full year when they themselves admitted there was no abuse or neglect happening tell me otherwise. CPS workers are not always out there for the benefit of the kids sometimes they are idiots with an agenda and tear down decent families to meet that agenda. That is not the case in this situation though. SO I will just say I am glad that the OP did what they felt was right and that the person they spoke to was understanding. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TravelingChris Posted January 11, 2012 Share Posted January 11, 2012 Especially if these children are foster children, I am glad you made the call. When we were in training to be foster parents before we had any children, it was very obvious to us that some of the people there were only in it for the money. Two quick examples- one man in the training had a constant question - when do we get the money, how much money, etc=money, money, money. Second example, when we got our foster daughter, she only came with the clothes on her body and two items of clothing which were too big for me, let alone an eight year old. This girl was in her second placement and the home from which she came had received $300 extra for her clothing. Obviously they bought nothing or else kept it. She told me she had to sleep on the couch because although there was an empty bed, that was in the natural daughter's bedroom and this girl wasn't allowed to go in there. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Little Nyssa Posted January 11, 2012 Share Posted January 11, 2012 Good for you. :grouphug: Hope you see some changes soon. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ohdanigirl Posted January 11, 2012 Share Posted January 11, 2012 Social Services, in general, investigate all reports of child abuse/neglect. This is absolutely not true. (Tangent to follow) When I was 19 MIL showed up with BIL and stayed at our house for a visit about a month. One day she said she was going to the store, and didn't come back for months. Her 13 y/o was left behind with one change of clothes, not enrolled in school, and no idea what was going on. At 19, I was unsure what to do, and called CPS for help. They offered none, other than putting BIL in a group home if we dropped him off outside a set location (group home, police station, firehouse). They wouldn't even come out and and see if he was actually being cared for, Or to offer us some options, and maybe parenting classes. In hind sight, I see it was probably great that I didn't have to deal with CPS, but getting this kid into school without the correct papers from a court proved to be very difficult. It happened to be tax season, so we were able to buy him a new wardrobe, school supplies, and pay cash for the necessary Dr. visits he had to have to get in to school. Everything took an extreme amount of effort on our part because we had no paper work from CPS of the court. When this happened again, I didn't even both trying to get help, we moved to Mexico and started homeschooling the next BIL. As for the OP, if you are truly concerned, you should call. Maybe if there are enough calls, they will investigate. Danielle Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
magnificent_baby Posted January 11, 2012 Share Posted January 11, 2012 This is absolutely not true. (Tangent to follow) When I was 19 MIL showed up with BIL and stayed at our house for a visit about a month. One day she said she was going to the store, and didn't come back for months. Her 13 y/o was left behind with one change of clothes, not enrolled in school, and no idea what was going on. At 19, I was unsure what to do, and called CPS for help. They offered none, other than putting BIL in a group home if we dropped him off outside a set location (group home, police station, firehouse). They wouldn't even come out and and see if he was actually being cared for, Or to offer us some options, and maybe parenting classes. In hind sight, I see it was probably great that I didn't have to deal with CPS, but getting this kid into school without the correct papers from a court proved to be very difficult. It happened to be tax season, so we were able to buy him a new wardrobe, school supplies, and pay cash for the necessary Dr. visits he had to have to get in to school. Everything took an extreme amount of effort on our part because we had no paper work from CPS of the court. When this happened again, I didn't even both trying to get help, we moved to Mexico and started homeschooling the next BIL. As for the OP, if you are truly concerned, you should call. Maybe if there are enough calls, they will investigate. Danielle I agree with you that not all situations are investigated. Hopefully those are very few and far between, though. In a recent local case, the mother herself called and pleaded for help, I believe more than once. The outcome was absolutely horrible. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
In the Rain Posted January 11, 2012 Share Posted January 11, 2012 I think you did the right thing. :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lionfamily1999 Posted January 11, 2012 Share Posted January 11, 2012 This is absolutely not true. (Tangent to follow) When I was 19 MIL showed up with BIL and stayed at our house for a visit about a month. One day she said she was going to the store, and didn't come back for months. Her 13 y/o was left behind with one change of clothes, not enrolled in school, and no idea what was going on. At 19, I was unsure what to do, and called CPS for help. They offered none, other than putting BIL in a group home if we dropped him off outside a set location (group home, police station, firehouse). They wouldn't even come out and and see if he was actually being cared for, Or to offer us some options, and maybe parenting classes. In hind sight, I see it was probably great that I didn't have to deal with CPS, but getting this kid into school without the correct papers from a court proved to be very difficult. It happened to be tax season, so we were able to buy him a new wardrobe, school supplies, and pay cash for the necessary Dr. visits he had to have to get in to school. Everything took an extreme amount of effort on our part because we had no paper work from CPS of the court. When this happened again, I didn't even both trying to get help, we moved to Mexico and started homeschooling the next BIL. As for the OP, if you are truly concerned, you should call. Maybe if there are enough calls, they will investigate. Danielle I knew a couple that babysat a boy for ten years (he was three when they got him). She had been watching him every day while his mother worked and then one day his mother didn't come back. She called CPS after two days (and filing a missing persons report on his mother). They pointed out that because he was in a safe home with a person the parent had made guardian (apparently you're a guardian even if you're just sitting) there wasn't any reason for them to interfere. They just did everything signing as his guardian and no one ever batted an eyelash. I think it's much the same way that the Red Cross will not get a hotel for a family if they've found a corner to squat in. Btdt. We were sleeping (three of us) on a twin mattress in my parents' house, but because we had found somewhere inside they couldn't help us. They had to reserve their resources for people that had nowhere. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mom2scouts Posted January 11, 2012 Share Posted January 11, 2012 :hurray: Good for you. I've read so many news stories about children being hurt and abused and all the neighbors, teachers and relatives say that things seemed "off" or they thought something might be going on but they were afraid to report it because they didn't have any real evidence. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NorthwestMom Posted January 11, 2012 Share Posted January 11, 2012 Thank you for going outside your comfort zone and placing the call! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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