Would you wear your late mother's clothing?

[BamaTanya]

I looked through Mom's closet yesterday. Dad hasn't moved a thing, but I know he's waiting for me to help him. He doesn't have the heart to do it by himself. (I won't move anything without checking with him!)

 

She had some clothes that would suit me so well. *I* would like to wear them, though I wonder if it would make Dad sad to see me in them.

 

And then I wonder if it would make me too sad, too.

 

It doesn't take a dress to remind me. Everything reminds me of her. Every flower that blooms. All the pretty things she bought to decorate our home. All the toys and books she gave the children . . .

[Tracy in Ky]

Yes, I do it a lot. My mom had beautiful clothes; she always looked so nice. I love wearing her clothes, because it reminds me of her in a good way. Sometimes they still smell like her too, which makes it seem like she is right there.

[momofkhm]

If she had stuff that fit and I liked, yes I would.

[Kathleen in VA]

Most definitely - although you may need time to heal before you can. My mom died in 1995 and my grandmas died in 1997 and 1998. I still wear a few of their things (sweaters especially) because they make me feel warm and loved. I have a sweater that was my grandpa's too (he died in 1971) - it is too big to wear, but it is a sweater he wore all the time and I love looking at it.

 

Kathleen in Va

www.homeschoolblogger.com/lavendersblue

[Harriet Vane]

My aunt is currently in a nursing home due to a brain tumor. This aunt and I grew up together--our mothers had a business together, and we also lived together for a time.

 

When her husband passed on clothing of hers to me I knew much of it wouldn't fit (she is ten inches shorter than me) but thought maybe some things would work.

 

I did find tee shirts and some other things that fit me just fine, but when it came right down to it I couldn't wear them. I knew my aunt would have been glad for me to have them, glad for me to wear them, but I just felt too sad and too weird about it. Then I became paralyzed emotionally and couldn't figure out what to do with the clothes--force myself to wear them? Donate? A dear friend ended up coming and taking them from me. I think she donated them. I was so grateful that she took care of it.

 

I would say that you should talk to your dad about it. If he's okay, give it a try. If it's too hard you can always not wear the clothes. You might also have a friend in on this who can help you if you become paralyzed by the issue as I did.

[PrairieAir]

No, but my mom's clothes wouldn't fit for size or style. If you're worried about it upsetting your dad, maybe you could just wear them when he won't be around. It could bring back happy memories as well.

[Night Elf]

No, because we have vastly different tastes.

 

However, I did wear my late father's clothes! :o He had some shirts and sweaters that were awesome and hardly worn. Wearing them reminded me of him. My parents were divorced and living in separate states so nothing I brought home from his house meant anything to my mom though. Gosh, that was 20 years ago. It doesn't seem like that long.

[WTMindy]

Yes, but I would ask my dad first if it would bother him.

[OnTheBrink]

No, because she's 8 inches shorter than I am and because we didn't have a good relationship, so I don't particularly want to feel her around me.

 

However, categorically, I see no problems with you wearing your mom's clothes. Ask your dad if he'd be ok with it.

[Sarah CB]

My initial reaction was that I would wear her clothes. My mom and I are nearly the same size and she has some beautiful things. But, as I was reading the thread I started to cry just thinking about not having my mom. I'm so very sorry for your loss. If your mom's clothes will make you happy rather than sad then go for it.

[Aubrey]

Yes. It's comforting, at some point. I have clothes that belonged to both of my grandmothers & dh's grandmother. Everyone is glad to see them, & it provides a kind of connection, imo, to see yourself in them. You think about the size & the taste that you've inherited. I like it.

[Jennifer in NH]

My father passed away last year and When Mum was getting rid of his clothes my sister and I took some. She took some T shirts to remember him by, and I took his favorite pajamas. I wear them quite often. I also took and wear a few of his sweaters. My mother is not around much in the winter (she winters in Florida), so I don't have to concern myself then if it will upset her. This summer I have no intention of wearing any of those clothes around her. She gave me full permission to take them and was happy about it...but everything reminds all of us of him, so I don't see the need to add to it for her. As for me...I love wearing his clothes right now...It may be silly, but I feel more connected to him when i am wearing them... Okay, tears are flowing now...so i really have to go...good luck..sorry you lost your mom.

[Hannah]

My mom was a lot shorter than me, so nothing would have fit me, but I did keep a jersey just to remind me of her. I still have it 20 years on.

[In The Great White North]

I do. I wore her clothes before she got sick too.

 

It never occured to me (or my sister) that Dad would mind. Frankly, I'd be surprised if he noticed.

 

There are still things that set me off, but for some reason not the clothes.

 

It's been 12 years - maybe I should update my wardrobe?

[Unicorn.]

I do. A lot of her stuff didn't fit me, but I have a sweatshirt w/ birds on it that I wear. I also have a red flannel nightgown that I always wear at Christmas. It doesn't make me sad, it makes me think of her and smile. I'm sorry for your loss. I think you should keep some things. I bet your dad would rather it be you than a stranger that wears them, and you don't have to wear them in front of him.

[SnowWhite]

Yes. I wore my late grandmother's spring jacket for a long time. I still have her keyring on my keychain. I remember putting my hands in the pockets of her jacket when I was in college and feeling like I was sitting on her lap. (tearing up now just typing that). And I'm not a sentimental person, most of the time.

[WTMindy]

Yes. I wore my late grandmother's spring jacket for a long time. I still have her keyring on my keychain. I remember putting my hands in the pockets of her jacket when I was in college and feeling like I was sitting on her lap. (tearing up now just typing that). And I'm not a sentimental person, most of the time.

 

That makes me tear up too! I have my grandmother's bedroom desk where she kept her jewelry and things. When I open the drawers it still smells like her powder and it makes me happy and sad just to smell it. I love the smell!!

[tbmoran]

Yes, I would. First, I'm sure my mom would rather I be blessed by wearing them and getting the good out of them rather than having a stranger wear them. Second, I would feel loved by my mom everytime I wore them. I agree you could wear them when your dad is not around.