Ds requested info from the Navy, and they called today

[Chris in VA]

He has pretty much stopped doing any work at community college, and is looking at the Navy. I checked out a book on the ASVAB from the library to look thru it and just know, for myself, some information.

 

So, I guess I'm asking for prayers, yet again. It would be nice if he'd get some direction and could find something bigger than himself to believe in.

 

Thanks for listening.:001_smile:

[*lifeoftheparty*]

.

[battyjac]

My only advice would be to find someone experienced with the Navy that isn't actually the recruiter. My dad was in the Navy for 20 years. He got in trouble as a recruiter because he wouldn't lie/mislead the kids. The Navy isn't bad, it has a lot to offer but so many end up disappointed because of the broken promises of the recruiters. My dad helped my friends that were joining the military sort through the recruiter-speak to get to the reality.

 

My brother didn't do well in community college, joined the Navy as a nuke (intelligence wasn't the problem, obviously), came out 8 years later with his BS then eventually got his masters and is now working on his Ph.D. The Navy helped him figure out what he wanted and provided the means to pay for it (to a point at least).

[Heatherwith4]

:grouphug: I hope he finds the direction he needs to get on track. Praying for you and him!

[scrapbookbuzz]

I'm going to agree with Gao that the military is great for structure and learning something as you're trying to 'find yourself', which is what it seems like your son is doing. If he's interested and they want him, let him go, mom. Hard to do, I know. As for the recruiters, yes, unfortunately, some do lie just to get their numbers. Sometimes, they just don't know what can be offered. If your son really wants a particular job, etc, and the recruiter hems and haws, make the recruiter CALL someone who does know. Feel free to PM me with any questions.

[Sebastian (a lady)]

There is also the problem of selective hearing on the part of candidates. For example, someone might not qualify for being commissioned as an officer. So they ask if they can enlist and then become an officer. The answer is a qualified yes, there are programs for that. But they may not pay attention to the requirements of the program or how selective it may be. (And some recruiters will answer that something is possible, without explaining how difficult it is.)

[nukeswife]

If your son would like to talk to someone that is currently Active duty in the Navy let me know and I'll give you my dh's email address. He's been in for 15.5 years and is currently an Executive Officer on his ship. He went in after graduating with a BS in physics, but he's also not a "Rah-Rah the Navy is the Best" kind of guy. He'll listen to your son and give him an honest opinion about whether the Navy would be a good fit or not, some recruiters (not all) are more about "get some butts in the seat".

 

The Navy can be hard. When dh and I got married 13.5 years ago deployments were about 6 months and when they returned he usually was home for about 6 months before the ship would go anywhere else. They do a lot of of out of port time that isn't a full deployment. Now a days deployments are longer and there is less time in between. My dh left for deployment on Jan 2 this year, returned home on Aug 3 and left again on Sept 27th. Since that day in sept he has been home for 2 days, a total of 64 days at home since the 1st of the year and he'll only be home for about 3-4 of the remaining weeks of the year. Even when you're in port work days can be long and you can be called in on a moments notice if schedules change or things happen.

 

Just a few things to think about. Sorry I rambled on, but as I said if your son would like to talk to someone that is in a "Been there, still doing that" situation let me know.

[TxMama]

Joining the Navy was the absolute best thing my own DS ever did.

 

He has only been in since Feb but he is a totally changed person. He is a man and not a confused boy that many of his peers can be at this age.

 

 

 

It was a long, long process. He first talked to a recruiter in May 2009, did not sign DEPer papers until October 2009 and left for basic in February 2010.

 

My advice. Get everything in writing ad do not sign up undesignated.

 

Study the ASVAB books. The higher the score the more job obtions he will have.

 

Will he be going under a homeschool waiver?

[katilac]

Another vote for speaking to a non-recruiter. My nephew's recruiter did not lie to him (that we're aware of), but finagled his paperwork and medical history to get him in. How he thought severe, chronic sleepwalking, wouldn't be noticed during basic training, I do not understand, lol, but dn was home within a few weeks. The recruiter also left off other, significant aspects of dn's medical history that were not so easy to spot, that could have had much worse effects than having to endure a week of sleep studies before being discharge :glare:

 

This was not Navy, btw.

 

Edited to add that I think joining the services can certainly be a great decision for some people, especially those with no direction in their life.

[MamaT]

:grouphug: Praying for you and your son, Chris.

[Impish]

My eldest is joining the Navy here, in Jan.

 

I'm not at all pleased.

 

That said, there's nothing I can do about it, and I just pray that he's safe during his time in the armed forces...while puking with fear upon occasion by me.

[Chris in VA]

Joining the Navy was the absolute best thing my own DS ever did.

 

He has only been in since Feb but he is a totally changed person. He is a man and not a confused boy that many of his peers can be at this age.

 

 

 

It was a long, long process. He first talked to a recruiter in May 2009, did not sign DEPer papers until October 2009 and left for basic in February 2010.

 

My advice. Get everything in writing ad do not sign up undesignated.

 

Study the ASVAB books. The higher the score the more job obtions he will have.

 

Will he be going under a homeschool waiver?

 

That's great about your son. No, he was not homeschooled.

[TxMama]

No, he was not homeschooled.

 

Then the process should be a little more streamline then what we went through.

 

www.navyformoms.com has a wealth of information. It was especially helpful during basic. Sons do not write as much as husbands so all my information came from a woman whose husband was in my son's Division.

 

Best of luck to both of you!

[*lifeoftheparty*]

.

[Karen in CO]

He has pretty much stopped doing any work at community college, and is looking at the Navy. I checked out a book on the ASVAB from the library to look thru it and just know, for myself, some information.

 

So, I guess I'm asking for prayers, yet again. It would be nice if he'd get some direction and could find something bigger than himself to believe in.

 

Thanks for listening.:001_smile:

:grouphug:

My sister joined the Navy at 18 and is now happily retired. It was the very best thing for her. It wasn't easy, but she was on a path to self-destruction and the stucture gave her the support she needed to survive and make a life for herself.

[Chris in VA]

:grouphug:

My sister joined the Navy at 18 and is now happily retired. It was the very best thing for her. It wasn't easy, but she was on a path to self-destruction and the stucture gave her the support she needed to survive and make a life for herself.

 

:grouphug: back attcha.

 

I'm hoping for a good outcome.

As much as I wonder if it's a good move for him (and some of you have pm'd me that you have reservations, too), he needs something. I would just love to see a light in his eyes again.

Thanks for the support, everyone. Whether you think it's a good idea or want to give cautionary counsel, it's all so very appreciated.

 

And Gao, the stats really are a comfort.

[Rosie_0801]

I hope it works out. This change has to be better than no change.

 

:grouphug:

Rosie

[Chris in VA]

I hope it works out. This change has to be better than no change.

 

:grouphug:

Rosie

 

That's something to hold on to, isn't it?

[Mimm]

My brother joined the army and liked it a lot. There was stupid stuff like guard duty and things like that. His college was paid for by the army after he got out. He wasn't directionless or anything, but he has no regrets.

 

I have another brother who is planning to join at the beginning of the year and I am praying that he does so. He's never worked hard a day in his life and can't hold down jobs. He's desperate for self discipline and structure in his life.

[plansrme]

This change has to be better than no change.

 

I have nothing to contribute to the original post, but this is very insightful.

 

Terri

[KingM]

My BIL is a nuclear engineer, with college education paid for by the Navy. He spent a lot of time on subs, which was hard for his family, but once he got out in his mid-thirties, he got a great job with BP based on his training and leadership experience, plus he has some perks that come from having put in his time in the military.

 

I think the military can be a great choice for generally good kids who need some enforced discipline. You have to accept the risk, of course, that someone might start shooting at you some day.

[Mergath]

It got me back on track and changed me forever. I owe every bit of awesome-ness in my life to joining the Army. I met my hubby in Chinese language training. Lived in Monterey, CA and Hawaii. I accomplished things I never imagined I would and changed me into the person I am today, THANK GOD! :) There is NO DOUBT in my mind that God led me to and through that decision.

 

If he has any interest/choice, look up being a linguist. You have to take the DLAB test, which uses a made up language to test language skills. I did very well on the test and was assigned to learn Chinese. You get to go to the Defense Language Institute in Monterey, CA which is AWESOME. It's near Carmel and Big Sur and absolutely BEAUTIFUL! Chinese linguists almost always get sent to Hawaii as a first duty station, but if not, make it down there eventually, especially Navy folks. They also get some pretty cool ship assignments.

 

All the extras, like GI Bill and VA Home Loan Assisstance, are just icing on the cake ;)

 

Ah, a fellow DLIer. :D I was there in, erm, 2003, I think, with the Army. Was going to do Korean, but I got the boot for a big ol' pile of medical issues. I was there for several months, though. And I would like to say, God bless the hooka bar and Jamba Juice. Also, I have avoided running uphill ever since because I have horrible flashbacks.

 

Sorry, I'm done hijacking now. :)

[*lifeoftheparty*]

.