How do you get motivated to enter "The High School Years"?

[Colleen]

I couldn't decide whether to post this here or at the Sonlight boards, on the parent of high schoolers. I decided to go ahead and post it both places so I can get more feedback. Though truth be told, I don't even know what it is I'm asking. I need some encouragement or a swift kick in the rear or advice or maybe just an ice cold Mike's. I'm a "do the next thing" kinda gal and that approach has served me in good stead over the years. Even as my oldest heads toward 8th grade, I haven't stressed over the details of the years ahead. Just keep on keeping on. Well and good.

 

But.

 

The closer he gets to the high school years, the less I want to think about it. I want to bury my head in the sand. I want to immerse myself in the relative simplicity of my younger guys and just...not think about the dwindling number of years left before my oldest faces Life head-on.

 

It's not only the academics; it's the whole shebang. Helping him as he considers whether he wants to go to college; want he wants to study. Or encouraging him to take more responsibility, learn more about different career choices, consider whether missions/service are in his future. Guide him as he approaches manhood. (Of course I've been doing that for nearly 13 years, but it seems to take on so much more meaning the older he gets.)

 

Ya know, if my oldest were my only child, maybe I'd just be marching ahead without a second thought because, well, this is clearly what's next. But since I have younger boys, I keep focusing on how simple it is to do math with a 2nd grader; how easy it is to simply read a picture book to a pre-schooler. I don't want to tackle new horizons and tough decisions. I suppose I can take comfort in the fact that I'll only have to "start" the process once. (After which I'll be "in" that process, with one son or another, for the next 15 years. LOL)

 

Does this ring a bell with anyone? Is there some magic pill I can take that will enable me to go forth with enthusiasm and confidence into this new world?

[Mrs Mungo]

I totally know how you feel. My eldest will be entering 7th grade next year and I already posted on another thread that I feel a rising panic about it. I'm with you, I'd be fine if it were just the two of us but with two other kids to keep schooling? It seems like a daunting task.

[GraceinMD]

I'm with you, I'd be fine if it were just the two of us but with two other kids to keep schooling? It seems like a daunting task.

 

Does it make you feel any better to know that EVEN IF you only have one, it still seems daunting?! See, I figure I can mess this one child's future up, and get no other chances to "get it right!" You get do-overs! :001_smile:

 

Anyway, if there's room in the boat, there's at least one mom-to-an-onlie to join y'all! I figure that I'll just try to learn from some of the wisdom here (although, honestly, I can only take it in small doses - it makes me feel very panicky!)

[Chris in VA]

I had an interesting introduction to homeschooling--one in K, and one in 9th grade. Beginning school, and beginning high school--good thing I was too dumb to be anxious.

 

This is only our 3rd year of homeschooling, so you know tons more than I do--but here's the deal on high school from my perspective--

Yes, it "counts" now--what you do with dc will affect their future opportunities in life b/c "someone" will see and evaluate their performance, and will determine the path, college-wise, anyway. It seems daunting and hard and just plain intimidating.

But really, what you do with dc has always counted. It really is just one step further on the continuum. It seems like the path has changed, but the path is the same--it's just like the surroundings have changed, like walking from the meadow into the edge of the forest.

Just keep walking the path and you will get thru the woods. It may twist and turn, and you will have to watch out for big roots and rotten logs, but remember, you are not walking alone, and, even if the path gets covered in darkness, you are holding Light's hand. He will guide you.

High school isn't high school all at once. 9th grade is just the grade after 8th. You will be fine, and so will dc.

[Nan in Mass]

I like just doing the next thing, too. At the end of 8th grade, I told my son that now he was in high school, we had to do things different. It wasn't that I wanted to, just that I thought we had to get him working more independently, begin grading, etc. He begged me to keep doing things the same way we had been. He didn't see why they had to be different, when what we were doing was nice and worked. I also tried to get him to think about what he wanted to do for a job in the future, what he might want to study in college... He had no idea. He tried to cooperate, but he had no idea what he wanted to do, and was totally uninterested in thinking about it. So, we just kept doing what we were doing. I did draw up a general WTM-based plan for a college prep high school that involved what interests he had, and gave some thought to how I was going to show colleges that he had indeed covered the material listed on his transcript despite no grades, a slow style that meant that he would test very badly, and no dates due to extensive absenses during the school year for peace walking and our rather loose style of doing things, but other than that, we just did the next thing. (I decided that CC classes would solve the above problems and a few others as well.) I kept reminding him that he needed to think about college and careers from time to time. In 10th grade, we went and visited a few local colleges, ones I thought he might be interested in. We did some very general talking about what sort of college might suit him, and what sorts of things colleges wanted to see on the entrance application. And lo and behold, by the end of 10th grade, when he was 16, he was those things that I had thought he had to be at the beginning of 9th. He was working quite independently. He was ready to take some easy CC classes in the fall. He had decided what he wanted to do for a career. He had been thinking about it, as I asked. From time to time, we talked about his general life goals, like be able to take time off to go peace walking, be able to support a family, be able to go snowboarding in the winter and sailing in the summer, be able to live with his brother until he had his own family, ... The thinking was just underneath sort of thinking, not overt research.

 

What I'm trying to say is that I think aside from doing some academic planning based on your local high school requirements or college entrance requirements and your personal family homeschooling goals, and some gentle nudging about thinking about careers, you CAN just keep on doing the next thing. It feels like your children have to be ready for college when they go into high school, but that doesn't take into account how much they will grow in the next 4 years. They don't stop growing just because they are in high school. In public school, 9th grade material is easier than 12th grade material for exactly that reason. We see that less in the homeschooling materials we use.

 

I love the small child stage best, too, and I'm good at that stage, but high schoolers are fun also. They have their own unique, wacky senses of humour that will keep you smiling. (But you have to watch for the jokes they make because they don't always look like the jokes they are meant to be and their feelings will be hurt if you misinterpret.) They have new ways of looking at things that will force you to reevaluate how you think the world works and make you grow. They are old enough to learn some things on an adult level, which means that you can pick some things you want to learn and do them together and actually get to count it for school - much more interesting than spelling and grammar and arithmetic. Some of the things you don't think you want to relearn may turn out to be more interesting than you remembered. Lots of life's little mysteries get cleared up as you relearn some of the science. They are old enough to provide support and entertainment and company for you in the somewhat adult-starved job of homeschooling mother. Just keep talking to them and discussing things with them and you'll get back lots.

 

-Nan

 

PS You might want to look at this post: http://www.welltrainedmind.com/forum...26706#poststop

[Laura K (NC)]

For both me and my son it was a practice year. We tried grades, keeping track of projects and books read, and harder classes. That sort of helped both of us get in a more academic frame of mind, and helped me start taking schoolwork more seriously.

 

We also toured a private school and a public school during their open houses. This was helpful for me to see what kind of books they were planning on reading in the classrooms my son might be going to (he had already read many of them, and there were some I would definitely have to prevent him from reading somehow). We also saw the math books they would be using and the math sequence, and the science labs, and the cafeteria, and the sports.

 

In all of this decision my son did have a vote. He chose to stay home. With us he looked at the pros and cons of public school. We all went into high school with eyes wide open to the helps we could access through homeschooling here and our limitations, and decided that with these helps, our son could have an ideal education at home.

 

If you get into a high school mode during 8th grade now, and if your fretting turns into productive information-gathering, then you will be more confident next year when your son begins classes. Once my son began we were all excited to begin and it has been a blast so far... better than I imagined.

 

My other two sons have different needs, but I'm not going to consider them yet. My next one will be in 8th grade next year, and during that year I will be investigating a different set of high school options for him, and making sure that, as an artist, he gets the courseload that suits him best. I'm more confident that homeschooling will work with him because of the nature of his strengths.

[Laura in OH]

Don't get me wrong -- I have loved every stage of my daughter's life. Every age has been fun for me. Honestly, though, I was most excited about the rhetoric stage because it truly meant we could learn together. I am looking forward to the great books study (and discussions), the sciences (I never really had a good science class in ps), math, foreign language -- all of it! I've even considered taking some CC classes with her (like Spanish), since I never learned that in school either.

 

I do feel a little stressed because I have not ever kept grades, but I can learn :001_smile:. I am excited for the plan God has for her life and that I get to be a part of it!

 

I realize that, IMO, having only one child I can thoroughly enjoy the high school years and not have to worry about also teaching math facts and spelling to a younger child. However, I've seen many homeschoolers who have their older child help teach the younger ones. It reinforces the older's knowledge and strengthens the bond between the siblings (usually...!).

 

Just my 2 cents...

[percytruffle]

Well, I certainly was a bit nervous about tackling high school. It meant taking responsibility for more than academics. I had to help direct a life: career planning, college entrance exams, college applications, life skills, driving instruction, extracurricular activities, volunteer opportunities, first jobs, transcripts, scholarships...on and on and on. It seemed burdensome when I started to think about it. Then, I did what I'd done all along. I went to the library and the book store and read as many how-to type books about homeschooling high school as I could. I reread TWTM, again. I visited the boards here to pick the brains of those who have done this before. I began to formulate a time line in my mind and even on paper and to plan out what I thought would be a good course of action with each of the dc, keeping in mind their personality types, interests and abilities. Of course, this planning has remained in flux over the years, but it was a board on which to hang pegs. It was an overreaching goal and structure to the high school years.

 

What I found in the end was that because I had taken time to prepare myself intellectually and emotionally through the process of gathering and pondering information and formulating a plan, my mind was greatly relieved. I realized that on paper it was doable. Also, as the kids matured, they took on a good deal of the responsibility themselves, more than I realized they would. I have seen many instances in larger families and in families with younger kids still, that the older kids actually mature much more quickly and easily because they have to take on responsibility for their own decisions and take the lead. This is a good thing. You don't have to carry all the weight for them. That is the beautiful part of the process of growing up and part of the transitioning to high school and beyond as a hs family.

[Robin in Tx]

Oh, Grace, this is so true... the only thing I have to think about homeschool/academic wise is my one dd, and I think I obsess over it way too much... what I would give to have a younger student to distract me and keep things in balance. Like SWB says, this is such an important, serious, topic... ALL parents struggle with this, no matter how many kids they have or what their circumstances are. I have friends with kids in school who struggle/worry over all sorts of decisions for their kids as well, especially as they approach high school. They meet with the counselors, look at all the course tracks, extra curriculars, etc., trying to make sure the very best is being done for their kids. The point is that we all love our kids and want what's best for them, and we ALL worry about doing the right thing for them. I think this is universal, and not limited to or measurably different between the number of kids you have, or whether or not you homeschool. I think it's just normal. At least I like to think that, because it makes me feel normal! :)

 

ETA: Colleen, I don't know if this has helped you or not... but it has helped me quite a bit. Knowing that it *is* universal, and that I would be going through some sort of worry about choices even if I weren't homeschooling, has been very helpful to me. Obviously, I can't answer your original question, because I do not have any experience with getting motivated for high school... but I do get a lot of reassurance from the fact that we all go through this, and that it feels like the weight of the world is on your shoulders sometimes, and that even if your circumstanes were different (you had fewer kids, you weren't homeschooling) it would still feel like the weight of the world... anyhow, hope it helps you too, somehow.

 

Robin

[Jill- OK]

...I'm enjoying teaching my older kids so much!

 

Not that I don't still love teaching Littles, too, but...I guess I'm just sort of set up for parenting older kids a little better. I hate to say that, and it might not even really be true, but I find that I enjoy my (older) kids having their own lives that sort of intersect with mine, rather than being the end-all, be-all.

 

I have to remind myself to cherish time with my youngest (3yo). I have to really concentrate to enjoy teaching 2nd grade math, lol.

 

But good conversations? Really good conversations with a teen/pre-teen? I think that's exciting. And I'm excited to make that more and more of our day-to-day schedule in high school. I've tried to use 8th grade (this year) as a preparatory period, and get into some of the habits I want to have for HS, and I think it's worked, lol. (We're still kind of slackers, but, hey...it seems to be working!)

 

One thing that hasn't always excited me is the pressure of this being the "Final" 'go through' for my kids. The last chance to cement skills. The last chance to cover certain things. It was kind of a momentous decision to bump my almost-13yo up a grade, giving me *two* entering high school next year, and that probably heightened the sense of pressure, but what I'm seeing thus far reassures me that it was the right decision for him, and I'm going to survive. :o)

 

I'm not a record-keeper, either, but I found the most awesome resource that perfectly fits us. It's called The Homeschooler's High School Journal, and it's a, well, journal that I plan to have my kids fill out as they do things. Places for notes about each subject, each week, with spaces to fill in that denote each quarter hour spent. The set-up is really neat, and the way I plan to use it is as an assignment sheet (going over what needs to be done, together, writing it in each subject square, then checking them off as it's done), and record book. (The 'time spent' section helps for figuring credits for subjects that don't neatly follow one full book/year plan).

 

As far as getting motivated...I don't know. I mean, the fact that I like this age, kid-wise, and that I'm excited about what we're going to do makes a huge difference, I'm sure. But that aside...it's important. That's the only way I know to really get motivated about something that matters; remember its importance.

[Beth in SW WA]

Is there some magic pill I can take that will enable me to go forth with enthusiasm and confidence into this new world?

 

Prayer & Fasting perhaps? :)

 

We are so blessed that the fine folks on the high school board share their wisdom w/ us. Colleen, we can all hold hands and share the adventure together. It will certainly be a wild ride. :auto:

[Jenny in Atl]

I'll be there right along with you. Dd12 wants to go to HS, but I need to plan for if we decide not to go that route or if it does not go as she thinks/hopes/imagines. I too feel completely overwhelmed by the high school years. I have awful, do the right thing, issues, nervous to make a mistake that will in some way ruin her chances of a bright future. Why I feel confident up to the 8th grade, but not beyond, is a mystery to me. I know I will be reading on this board more and more as we move into 7th this year.

[Jane in NC]

Prayer & Fasting perhaps? :)

 

 

 

This is probably not the day for me to participate in this thread. But Beth's response brought a needed chuckle.

 

There are days when homeschooling a high school student is a cake walk. My son is independent, fairly motivated, has interesting ideas to bring the discussion, and possesses a great sense of humor.

 

He is also a walking bundle of testosterone. (It has finally hit me why he has been so unpleasant the last few days. Hockey games were canceled over the weekend because of Easter. My son needs the physical activity and aggression outlet that hockey provides.)

 

So, the first rule of homeschooling an active boy: make sure that he has a sufficient number of exhausting physical activities. Then when you want him to focus on Latin, mathematics, history, etc., he will (at least sometimes).

 

Independent learning is not achieved overnight and perhaps should not even be a goal. Narrow ideas may be produced in a vacuum. That is why talking about history, literature, how to prove something becomes so important in these high school years. Adolescents like to talk. My son will pontificate on minutia (a ploy to avoid work??)

 

One terrific aspect of home schooling a high schooler is having the child see how normal life works. Some of my sons schooled friends don't know how to cook basic things. They don't seem to have a clue on the value of a dollar. One does not have to be homeschooled to appreciate these things, but it seems that, by being at home, a child is plugged into the process. I hope that he will have some basic sensibilities when he leaves this nest. (But from the way he has been acting the last few days, one wonders...)

 

Jane

[Nan in Mass]

When my boys' gymnastics program fell apart the year before last, it was May, and we thought we'd just wait until the fall before we looked for another program. Ha! Within two days, they didn't know what to do with themselves. They felt like different people to themselves. They said they felt like they were going crazy. The third day I took them to the nearest gym and enrolled them. It was an eye-openner for us all. Their "normal" state is either total exhaustion or total freedom (when we're sailing or traveling). They couldn't deal with ordinary, unexhausted, restricted life. I'd worry about this except that I know that by the time they have to, their hormones will have calmed down.

 

The other time they are unpleasant (what a great way to put it) is when they're not doing something they think they ought to be doing, and when they are mad at life, and hence me, since in the back of their minds, I'm ultimately responsible for everything. Something happens to their hearing in the teenage years and they are incapable of hearing what they sound like.

 

I like to think of the early teen years as the adult equivalent of the terrible twos (or in our case, the terrible threes). I helped me a lot to think of them as two rather than as adult.

 

Hang in there. The beginning of this week wasn't exactly something I'm proud of, either. Sigh.

 

Hugs,

-Nan

[Kim in Appalachia]

My oldest starts HS next year. It has been a struggle because she is not into academics. She is a decent student, but really she could care less about her grades. She is a typical teenage girl, with her mind everywhere but on school. I have worried that I will be unable to reel her in, but I have been working on my attitude.

 

I worry that I will not provide her with the education she should get, or that as the oldest of 5 she will get completely loss in the fray, but I have been trying to change my vision.

 

My goal is not to be the most incredible teacher for every subject she does (becuase I can't be), but to encourage her to learn, to keep working and not give up even when it is hard or boring. My new motto to her has been, "I'm on your side!" I am not here to criticize her every failing, but to help her succeed.

 

I know that HS is going to take a lot of work, and I have been gearing up for it. I have been trying to make sure that I create realistic goals. She will not do any work that I can not teach her. She is not good on her own, or even with an internet class. She needs constant attention and interaction to keep on tract.

 

We have been doing Omnibus, but next year we are switching to Ambleside. We need a slower pace so that we can focus on the basics.

 

I guess basically, my advice is to have a clear view of your child, know what you need to cover and take the time to plan how you're going to get there. It is only four years, it will go by :auto:.

 

Kim

[Robin in Tx]

My new motto to her has been, "I'm on your side!" I am not here to criticize her every failing, but to help her succeed.

 

 

What a gem! Thanks for this.

 

Robin

[Carrie in NC]

I keep motivated by focusing on the "must haves." These change somewhat for each child (Luke needed a disproportional amount of writing/ communications tutoring due to his disabilities), but for us generally means history, English, math, science, and foreign language. We do more than that, but I can keep myself from getting as stressed if I keep the "big five" as my focus.

 

I put 90% of my effort into developing these five subjects. I use outside classes when appropriate, or a curriculum with helps (like the Digital Video Tutor with Lial's math). I outsource Lit classes. If I didn't have one locally, I'd do internet. That's a weak link for me, so I don't try. Since my kids have ended up taking Spanish, I try to outsource that, too, since I don't know Spanish. Math, history, and some science we do at home. I don't mind teaching the sciences at home, but we have a great class situation with lab activities, and I prefer group study for science when possible. I teach the biology class, and my kids have taken chemistry and physics there as well.

 

Like I said, I put most of my effort into coming up with courses or classes that fit my student's need for each major area. I don't' always use the same materials again for a second student because they learn so differently. Hannah is about as auditory as they come! But Thomas is more of an auditory/visual mix, like me. Thomas also needs interaction, while Hannah was more a "let me do the work by myself, Mom, then we'll talk" kinda gal. Hannah enjoyed Hakim's History of US (using Sonlight), but so far the next three have hated it!

 

While I sort of have a four year plan, I don't really stress about that either. I generally take one year at a time, just like I did when they were younger. I'm willing to ditch some books, or change mid-stream when needed. I try not to make four years and college entrance my primary focus, even though both are important. I have this child to educate this year...what should I do for him/her now?

 

I don't keep the greatest records in the world, but I do keep a list of their courses and the syllabus for that course (or table of contents for main text, and/or list of books read). If I didn't keep a list, I'd forget in a year or two! :confused:

 

As for motivation for me.... I love teens. I love teaching teens. I think the teen years are easier in some ways for me because I relate the age a little easier. I'd rather have conversations than play "pretend" or play children's games! :blush: Young children just wore me out physically. (Older children wear me out emotionally! But that's another topic for another time!)

 

Not much help, but here you go.

[Crissy]

Fear.

Fear is the motivating factor right about now.

Jeffrey will be starting his high school years in the late summer months of this year and I am quite nervous about the whole thing.

 

Like you, we have always simply done the next thing. I purposefully chose curriculum that supported that particular style of teaching and learning all these years.

 

Now that it 'counts' I am not so comfortable with the whole idea.

Oh, I know it can work. I know he's getting a fantastic education. But that doesn't help me sleep at night. I feel as if I need to be planning.

And I don't care for planning.

[LisaNY]

(((Colleen)))

 

I understand your feelings. I worried about teaching my older dd as she approached 8th grade. It was a little scary to think that we were just about to enter the high school fast track. I wondered if I could handle it. I was having fun, gliding along, just learning and moving at our own pace. Then, suddenly, I realized that we had to get more serious, and keep track of hours, and think of transcripts, and, and, and... ALGEBRA!!:svengo:

 

As we moved through into 9th grade, I started to find a new groove. Yes, the work and responsibility level was greater, but with that, the rewards increased as well. I suddenly had this person sitting across from me that was *thinking* differently, and *responding* differently. We were dialoguing on a completely different level - blazing whole new trails together and it was *fun*!

 

Now, all that being said, we had our rough spots, as everyone does with a teenager. It's a rough period for them, but there were tons of bright spots that made up for the not-so-bright ones.

 

Sadly, my dd stopped thriving at home at the end of 9th grade, and we ended up putting her in ps for 10th. It was just time for her to go into a different environment. She needed to get out there with other kids, and being home was no longer a good thing for her.

 

Now, our younger dd will be going into 8th gr. next year, and I don't have those same fears. I am really, really looking forward to it, and I am appreciating the time I will have with her before she goes to school in 10th gr. I'd love to keep her home, but the chances of that are slim. Her big sister is in ps, and she wants to do that as well.

 

Colleen, I know you can do it. Just take it one day at a time, and...have a Mike's. Personally, I prefer Merlot, but - whatever blows your hair back. :D

[Laura K (NC)]

nt

[Karenciavo]

I think once the process starts you will see that it moves smoother than you think. Your son will be maturing, all the decisions you need to make do not need to be made at once and some of them will be worked out in ways you can't imagine right now. Relax and enjoy the ride.

[Beth in SW WA]

nt

 

Laura,

 

I'm was not referring to the casting out of demons when I responded to Collen, but rather simple supplication to God for divine wisdom and guidance. Sorry if I wasn't clear on that :)

 

http://www.allaboutprayer.org/prayer-and-fasting.htm

[Jan P.]

Hey Patty,

 

It does get better. I went through that too. I'm still trying to rework my relationship with my son, but I found that this is normal for many guys. I think it is that "wanting to fly out of the nest" stage, and it is helpful for boys to have lots of adult male input at this stage in their life. I discussed this at LENGTH with a dear friend of mine (not a homeschool mom) one time. Her ds was much the same, and it took the dad to step in and straighten the boy out about how he (the boy) should respectfully approach his mom. I've also heard others say that if the child wants to argue with them then they need to write their argument out on paper. See, you can get some persuasive writing out of them!! I threatened this with my ds, and since he hates writing, he surely calmed down. LOL!! It does get better. I did start outsourcing more and more classes for him since the two of us were at loggerheads at times. I don't regret sending my ds to the local cc his senior year to take dual enrollment classes. If I had been a bit richer, then I would have had him taking "lots" of online courses. Keep working on those character and relationship issues. It's hard going through it, but it's so worth it in the end. I get great compliments from other adults about how well brought up my ds is. You could knock me over with a stick! But it does my heart proud!!

 

God bless,

Jan

[Mama Bear]

Laura,

 

I'm was not referring to the casting out of demons when I responded to Collen, but rather simple supplication to God for divine wisdom and guidance. Sorry if I wasn't clear on that :)

 

http://www.allaboutprayer.org/prayer-and-fasting.htm

 

I'll take prayer and fasting for the casting out of demons. :tongue_smilie: Many days are just spiffy, others leave me wondering who kidnapped my kid. 'Scuse me while I go off to sit quietly and not eat.

 

:D

[Mama Bear]

I was reading this morning about how folks may best manage extreme duress. The author spoke of 12 step programs which tout the "One Day at a Time" approach, then said that such a goal seems really too much for her: she can do now. Right now. Only now. Then look -- you did it! Now has passed and you can do the next now, and so the day (or the squirrelly moment inside my head) passes.

 

I can't tell you what a lightening of the spirit I felt when I read that. I've been stuck in the negative feedback loop of: you have to get this right, they only have this once around, what are you doing, you're messing this up and you're not even to high school yet, get it right already, woman! And I hadn't even noticed that was what I was doing, just that things have felt heavier and heavier in the area of school lately and no one has been having much fun with it.

 

So. I don't feel I have anything to add to a "How to get motivated?" question, but I can state what I'll be doing: getting over it. Now. And again in five seconds. Ad nauseum. As I just continue to put one foot in front of the other -- doing the next thing, as I've always done, as you do. While recognizing that the game is changing, I can continue to drool over the prospect of new books and what's to come, just maybe without added anxiety over the perceived enormity of it all.

 

That's my story and I'm sticking to it. (Now. Breathe. Pay no attention to the crazy woman in the corner, whispering to herself.....)

 

Wishing you Peace and Blessings, friend.

[mysticamethyst]

Thank you for putting my fears into the words I have been unable to find. High school terrifies me. What if I choose the wrong programs? For so many years I have been able to use a unit study approach, and I see this is really no longer working for him; he has no challenges at all, except math. I loaned my copy of TWM out years ago and it never came back to me and I was okay with that, but I think I need it again. Reading all of your encouraging words does make me feel a bit better but I am definately not as confident as I was starting this path. I think its time for a group :grouphug: lol.

[Chris in CA]

I must be in denial, but the panic hasn't set in yet and I'll be entering grad school myself as my oldest starts hs.

yes it must be denial : ) but I'm okay with it

[Peela]

I must admit that although I am also a bit intimidated and concerned I might do wrong by my kids, I am on the other hand quite excited about these years. I have a 13yodaughter who is enthusiasm and delight incarnate. She just got elected as 1 of 50 Scouts to go and do a cultural exchange program with aborigines out in the desert over 2000 kms away. Her life bubbles and overflows with opportunities that she makes for herself and I facilitate, that have very little to do with Maths, Latin and History.

My next child though I think will take a long time to grow up and find his way in the world, so it will be a while before I "worry" about him since he is only 12. I have friends with kids the same age going to career days and such and I just don't feel the urge to do that yet.

 

I guess we all resonate most with certain stages of children's lives. Some people love babies the most, some love little kids- my favourite stage by far, as much as I love babies, -is middle school. I love watching my children turn into their own persons, and having great conversations with them...having them see me more as a person and developing a more mature relationship with me. Seeing them develop passions and personalities, develop their own values. Even fight back a bit and reason and argue. I get a buzz when my child articulates logically and clearly why I am wrong or why they shouldn't have to do something. Maybe I am wierd to enjoy the rebel in my kids, but I do :001_smile:

 

I havn't decided what to do with my kids in the last couple of years..our system here different from yours over there, since highschool starts here in grade 8. Its really only the last two years of highschool that count, so I have time up my sleeve. And you can bypass highschool altogether, in terms of a diploma or graduation, and get straight into university for many courses. And by then my daughter could be off backpacking around Europe with friends, knowing her. My son may never leave home, according to him, so maybe I will have to work at encouraging him to do some formal study.

 

Maybe I am denial, but I am enjoying these years thoroughly. But I dont have to think of transcripts and grades yet, by any means.

[Colleen]

I've wanted to get back here and "talk" more for a couple of days, but my computer time has come in fits and starts. When I'm in that mode, I tend to just jump on to the general board for a few minutes here and there. I've read some of your great replies but haven't been able yet to fully devote attention to this discussion. I'm hoping to get time to do that at some point this weekend ~ once I thaw out from spending five hours at the soccer fields in sub-freezing temperatures.:blink:

 

Just wanted to let everyone know how much I appreciate this conversation ~ and I guess I'm not alone judging by how many views this thread has had. Very encouraging! More later...

[Maverick]

I hope you didn't freeze to death at the soccer games yesterday. I'm looking forward to hearing your thoughts on this thread. :001_smile: