I am thinking about authorizing my teenager on a store credit card (of mine). I have no real reason to, or not to, was just thinking about doing it. Their terms say they'll start reporting the account to major credit reporting agencies in BOTH of our names. I'm not savvy about this type of thing. I carry no credit debt, and pay off my balances every month. I have no car, home, or student debt either. I'm wondering how this might affect him - with regards to financial aid down the road, job applications (they seem to run credit checks these days), and any cards he'll want to take out in his own name in the next few years (gas, etc.) I don't know if it'll help, hurt, or not matter at all to begin a credit history right now. Which is smarter: to just let him use my card when he needs it, or to authorize him as a user on the account?

This was the name of my childhood neighbor. People called her Leia, but Star Wars was popular back then. But she was named after a Roy Orbison song, and he clearly says LEE-uh. LOL

Eh-lee-ah-na is how I'd say it. But it's a common name in my ex-husband's culture, and that's how they pronounce it. I think if it weren't for people I know through him, my first stab might be: Elle-ee-ah-nah. A subtle difference, but still present.

This happened to my ex-husband, too! Weird. His people emigrated to the US in three different waves. The first wave had their name Anglicized upon entry. The second wave adopted the first wave's variation. By the time my in-laws came over they weren't doing the whole Anglicization-upon-entry thing any more, so they retained their native spelling. And it got weird because cousins went to school together - with two different name spellings and one pronunciation. Teachers couldn't get that the names were said the same way because one had a Western spelling and one had the traditional Yugoslavian spelling. LOL

No, it doesn't bother me, but my name is unquestionably ethnic so it's par for the course since I live in the US far away from any established (ethnic) community. The people here aren't terribly familiar with my ethnicity, or it's language. I started going by Ripley when I was dating my (now ex-) husband. His roommate's last name was Ripley, and when Ripley moved out he left behind his work jumpsuit. I loved that thing, it was super comfy. I wore when gardening or fixing up the house. Since none of my husband's friends were able to say my name correctly, and every time they dropped in I was wearing this work jumpsuit with the name "Ripley" embroidered on it, that's what they started to call me. And it stuck. And nobody really pronounces it incorrectly. :D

A haiku, by Ripley: I should be doing dishes, laundry, anything but instead I type

My kid never met a field trip or extracurricular he didn't like. :lol: An I've spent the better part of his small life sitting around, bored to tears watching him play baseball. Or soccer. Or basketball. Or scouts. Or church groups. Or park days with a homeschool group I couldn't stand (but participated in because it had other kids his age, whereas the group I preferred was mostly younger kids). And I did it all on my 3 days off from work each week, since the 4 days I worked I was on the road. There were plenty of other ways to spend my time, some necessary and some just plain ol' desire. LOL But I gave him the outlets he needed at the time, because I recognized that they were important. And at 13, he's able to give me the outlets I need, because he's old enough to understand they're also important. I know it's not everyone's situation, but I think by 13 most kids can recognize that parents have needs also. I've known people who NEVER want the kids around, but I didn't sense that the OP was like that. I think she was seeking some one-on-one with her friend, and I think it's a reasonable request that most 13 year olds can oblige (if it's explained to them well) ... and that many mothers can honor.

I voted other. The manager should if (s)he expects the underlings to. In short, the manager sets the example - good or poor - and should be prepared to deal with any glory or fallout resulting from that example. My dad and I worked for the same international company for years. He's still there, I recently retired. He is upper management, I was on the front line. He believes the same. Unfortunately the middle management layer between us didn't always see things that way, and there was often tension at that level. That's pretty much the only thing he and I ever agreed on when it came to work and our company. LOL

We kind of do. We'll do the basics (math and grammar) and take off the rest of the day. We DO take off "Teacher woke up on the wrong side of the bed days" which generally evens out with the local district's weather days. LOL

I'm a single parent, and even when I was married (to a soldier on a regular deployment rotation) it was usually just me and the kids. My 13 year old has always been more than just a kid, but never quite an adult. Part of that is his natural "old soul" and part of that was the environment at home. He gravitates towards adults and adult conversations; and he's a delight and interesting part of those. But there are times when his presence isn't welcome - and that's perfectly okay. And he gets that because when his friends are over there are times when he'd rather I not be right up in the conversation. LOL And it's not because there are topics inappropriate for my old, virgin ears ;) it's just one or more kids prefer a different dynamic. I'm not offended or put out when he asks me for space, nor is he when I or a friend ask for the same. It's not personal, it's not a slight, it's not a chink to his delicate armor of esteem. It's a simple, easily honorable request. One I'm happy to oblige when the tables are turned. OP, I'd find some middle ground. Learn to accept that there are times the girl will come, and hopefully your friend will be open to times when it's just the two of you. It may be that you need to cool things off a bit in the interim, if you're at different places regarding the friendship and your respective needs. That's okay, too. I hope you work it out.

If you added celery root, you'd have my MIL's standard soup :) She's from the Mediterranean, so I'd pick that profile. :)

This is good. This is good for me to think about. I'm in my 30s but when it comes to technology my kids have put me in the Over 80 category. I'm largely clueless about technology, suspicious about it, and ridiculously guarded about doling out my contact information. I don't do Facebook, I screen my phone calls, and prefer my phone to be a tool FOR ME TO USE AT MY CONVENIENCE and not a device to be at everyone's beck and call (maybe text and call? LOL) whenever they want to get ahold of me. I think that last bit is it. When asked for my phone number, I must view it as some kind of intrusion. I reserve that for people I've already vetted. But that's not how it works today -Jenny, you're right - it's what you do to jumpstart a friendship. And there's the rub. So Jean's right that it's not an introvert/extrovert thing; it's a hip/not hip thing. :lol: And apparently I'm in the "These Darn Kids Today" category with the rest of the crockpot crowd. LOL Good point, Jenny.

Me, also! I don't see God as my friend. We're friendly, but ... not friends. Like my human parents, too. :D I know this differs between Christians, even amongst my fellow Catholic Christians, and it's just how I am. Even my personal prayers are more formal, with respect to how I view our relationship. LOL I love the tradition of a rote prayer, especially before meals - it feels unitive. I love that my kids are praying the same prayers that generations of our family have prayed, and I'm hopeful that their children will also one day pray. I love that when we gather as a family to eat, we share not only the bounty in front of us but the prayer before it - collective, united, and meaningful as a tradition within our family and our faith. This Saturday we had a family gathering to celebrate my great-uncle's 95th birthday. The sound of over 100 people saying grace together before the meal was hauntingly beautiful. We also have personal prayers of thanksgiving, but we save those for times of day not tied to meals - usually before bed or at Adoration. As a family we do our rote prayers aloud together ;) followed by any free-flowing prayers we feel compelled to make (aloud or privately). I'm glad to read I'm not the only one! I find such peace and unity in the established prayer.

I've never heard that, but I'm :lol:! So frighteningly true ....!

Preach it, Sister. I'm with you. I've switched back to cookbooks for most of my recipes, for just this reason. I'm easily irritated, though. LOL

I think this is one of those things we benefit from in coming from a larger, close-knit family. We have fodder for examples, both healthy and not healthy, and plenty to discuss without it being personal and about my child. I'm careful to keep it more "preventative example" than gossip because, after all, these are people we love and care about. And in the likely event that my kids date a few duds, or (in the case of my daughter who is just naturally a needy person) otherwise find themselves in less ideal relationships, I want them to know that yes - we'll be talking about them :lol: but still loving them despite their questionable choices. LOL We reminisce around the dinner table often, and bad dating stories are some of the more popular - especially with the older kids and young adults. My kids will hopefully garner that we've all BTDT, and that they have a plethora of people to consult/confide to. For even the closest of parent-child relationships there are some things, some times, some kids who just need someone not-parent to talk with. I'm fortunate to have many options built in to my family. It's what helped me as a teen and young adult, and will hopefully help my own kids also. I also have a trash tv problem, and my kids will sit for a few minutes during one of my Bridezilla and Real Housewives marathons. Like Rebel Yell's court shows, these can be eye-opening opportunities to showcase the more questionable (and freakishly charming) of humanity before such personalities suck in my kids. LOL

I spent just shy of 20 years as a military wife, and had no problem making friends on a more relaxed schedule. LOL Honestly, I'd say that whole experience is probably why I'm Team Quill ;)

:lol: I try to avoid driving around dusk because the contrast isn't enough for me to see well. I'm totally getting up now to go check my windshield. And while I'm out there in the car, I may as well do a Starbucks drive-thru run. LOL (I could kiss you for that extra little incentive to get up. I was wanting a tea but felt too lazy to get up to make one. Now I can get my tea and still be lazy and check my windshield all at once. Just call me Productive Patty!)

As I read that, the visual was of me and my son. I totally get it. LOL :lol:

I'm Catholic, and we say the standard: Bless us, O Lord, for these Thy gifts which we are about to receive From Thy bounty, through Christ Our Lord. Amen. We also say grace after the meal: We give Thee thanks for all Thy benefits, O Almighty God, Who livest and reignest, world without end. Amen. May the souls of the faithful departed, through the Mercy of God, rest in peace. Amen.

I have type 2 diabetes. I also have the type of friends that are "research it to death'rs" so when it fell on their radar, they (each) (independently) presented me with an onslaught of information - books, blogs, documentaries, and even a cookbook. I accepted all of it graciously, because I believe the thought counts, but I didn't read most of it because I've been managing the problem just fine for years. So I think it depends on the person. Is it a good friend that will see you mean well? Is it someone who might still be struggling with the diagnosis? Diabetes is sometimes viewed in the same way some cancers are (lung, e.g.) in that lifestyle choices are often blamed - so it's hard for some to get feedback on the disease if they're in the frame of mind that others are judging them. It doesn't mean that you ARE judging, it just means it may be perceived as such because of where the PATIENT is. I haven't read it, but I'm guessing it covers diet ;) Truth is, most diabetics know what aggravates their condition. This book is only going to go over well if they're ready to read it and process the information to make those changes. Does this describe your friend? There may be a middle ground - what about discussing some of the information from the book, and in the course of natural conversation seeing if the other person might be interested in reading it. It may be interesting even outside of diabetes, you know?

I can't decide if we're the problem, or the victims. It's been one industry followed by another, etc. for decades now. We came to expect it in clothing and accessories, then furniture, now in appliances. What's next? What will be the tipping point where we swing back - if ever? Are the companies responding to our desire for new, changing, and quantity-over-quality? Or have they weaned us onto a higher-profiting model by training us to want these things?

So I guess the Expedit shelves and Billy bookcases are sold separately, too? This could add up quickly ...

I have irritated many people because I can't focus well - I have to be multi-tasking for something to click. Which seems backwards, but it's how I've always been. So having a conversation with me can feel frustrating to someone because they feel I'm dividing my attention (which I am, but it's how I can better pay attention)! And FWIW I don't ever multi-task with electronic devices, only paper or laundry or dishes or something. The random thought thing comes into play when I try really hard to focus on a conversation without appearing to be multi-tasking. So I'll be awesome with the eye contact, doing the nodding and um-hmm thing, and then my mind wanders. And I'm not good at thinking before speaking, so I'll interrupt someone with a random, completely unrelated comment that outs me as having not been paying full attention. It took the people at work awhile to figure me out, and those close to me understand I have to be drawing or moving or doing SOMETHING rote to keep my brain able to focus on whatever it is they're saying to me. They no longer take it personally, and I continue to work on thinking before speaking when I'm out in the real world amongst Those Who Don't Know Me.

Quill, I tend to be more like you. I'm actually quite extroverted, and have always sought out work that allowed me to fill that need (working with the public, e.g.) but as I've gotten older I realized that I'm an introvert in extrovert clothing. I only like interactions that are timed (to some extent - a transaction, etc.), fairly predictable, and on my time (meaning, I'm on the clock and prepared for it). Paging, Internet! When I'm not working, I want to hole up and be alone. I time the receipt of my mail and newspaper to when I see other neighbors have already gotten theirs. I'll hide in the garage sometimes because I hear my neighbor in her yard, and it's worth waiting ten minutes for her to leave so I don't have to fake an interaction. I'm not anti-social, I'm just pro-alone LOL. I think homeschooling my chatty kids exacerbates this. So I get that this is a dread thing - not because the kid is who he is, or the mom is who she is, but because it's forced interaction to which you perceive no direct benefit. Which sounds awful since presumably you (we) want your (our) sons to have friends and all, but .... it'll be nice the day they can manage their own social calendars, right? I've found that many Insta-friends are flighty, and move on just as fast as they came in. Of course you have the rogue barnacles who attach themselves permanently, but they seem to raise a different kind of flag ahead of time IYKWIM. One way I got around this at your son's age (and now!) is to encourage the boys to interact online some - for my son, it was his Minecraft server and Skype that allowed some (independent) interaction during the nascent friendship. It may be another online game or multi-player app, too. My 8 year old does words with friends and some drawing game with other kids she meets - she uses my phone and iPad to play, and many times that alone will be enough for satiating the insta-friendship. And if the kids click beyond that, I'm more able to commit to kicking in some resources for the friendship to continue developing - whether it's dinner out together after gymnastics or the park beforehand for 30 minutes or whatever. I don't know what your issue is, so my issue is the basis for my post. Hopefully something resonates, but if not - know that at least one person here can relate. And if it makes us horrible people, well, at least we still have someone to sit next to (and without trying to become friends TYVM)! :seeya: