Yes and no. If I had the time I would be more involved. Twice I tried to volunteer at local places but life got in the way. I did help with Vacation Bible School last summer and ds really wants to do it this summer, but the problem is that I have to bring dd if I go with him. And it's too far away to drop him off every day. Last summer I only did it two days as the third day I had a dental appt. and for those two days dh took off work to watch dd as a favor to me. He had enough vac. days so it was okay, but I don't like to resort to that. They provide daycare but that actually was a young girl in charge of any volunteers' kids and since I can't even handle dd I hate to put that responsibility on a teen. Ds really wants to do it again this summer and I'm trying to figure out a way to make it work. It is the last summer he can do it because of his age. The church has made it known they are seeking adult volunteers, too. To a certain extent I have and continue to live in a solitary way. I do speak to people and have acquaintances but I can also be a hermit and not sure it makes a big difference. What I mean is we do a lot of our shopping in larger cities, in a different county, and I don't feel like I'm typically going to run into someone I know when I'm out and about there. I am more familiar with some families at the church but that's because I sent ds to a new church this year for their Sunday school program (the one we did VBS with last summer). Prior to the Sunday school program, we went there quite a bit, but usually to a Mass that young families don't attend. I know several neighbors and that I guess makes one feel safer, but I'm not sure I have to know a lot of people to feel safe. Some areas are just low crime, laid back with friendly people and that is what makes them feel safe to me not necessarily my sense of belonging. Like if you are traveling you can stop somewhere and feel safe without being a part of that community. Likewise you could stop somewhere shady and want to get the heck out of there as soon as you can lol. It sounds like you really want that connection so you'd want to live somewhere where you could make it.

Ours is in January. I don't think we even considered the holiday, but we saw roads being blocked off for a parade during our honeymoon. We worked at places that were open just about every day of the year and I think we returned to work that Monday. We wouldn't have normally chosen January but I was pregnant and he proposed the same month I found out I was pregnant, which was October. I didn't want to try to do an Oct. wedding though that is our favorite month and if it was up to dh all the guests would have shown up in Halloween costumes lol. A summer wedding isn't particularly ideal to me in this area due to the temps (even an indoor wedding, which ours was).

Good that you can have some humor about it. Overall my day was good, but dd would not go to bed at all yesterday and it was pretty annoying. She also wouldn't quit eating lol. I had things to do last night so I didn't get to bed til well after midnight and when she did go to bed it was only because I twisted dh's arm to go to bed with her. Not the same but my toddler randomly rolled off the recliner last night. What's up with these kids lol

Not just your house and honestly I think I'm bad about this myself. If I ask dh to pick me up a bag of blue corn chips, I end up eating too much at once and not rationing them out. In your case I might just hide food Lol. Like put one box of unopened cereal in a hidden spot. Of course, your kids might go looking for that hidden spot later. It's more the snack/convenience food that is that way I think. We'll buy bread at Sam's that comes in two packs. Usually put one in the freezer and if we are going crazy with the bread we can pull one out of the freezer before the next shopping trip. Other idea is to warn the kids, "you need to make this last" and/or get onto them if you see them eating it all at the beginning of the week? lol

Thank you for clarifying. Sorry I got so confused in this thread.

In general, yes.

Isn't there a thread about this where someone said that the innocence was not there... too much s*xual content for young viewers? I'll see if I can find the thread.

Ah, I see. Yep, dh and I have had our share of things like this. We both ordered the same meal at a restaurant once and got very ill. Don't know if it was from the food handling or something else but I went to the dr and they said I had E. coli and gave me antibiotics or something. My sister and I are way more sensitive to food than some of the others in our family so we are quicker to toss food. Dh and I will go out to eat and I start the countdown on the to-go box. He'll say, "it hasn't been out that long" and I'll start doing the math lol. "But they brought it to the table at X time so you have to count from then, not what time we bagged it up." I try to keep it in the 2 hour range. He doesn't care.

I honestly somehow didn't realize that the families were related. I know it states it in the OP but it didn't sink in. Yeah, they need to be supervised and the aunt(s) or whoever should speak up if there are issues. Now the group text chain makes more sense, since they are related. But if you know who your audience is, you might wanna rethink that text. I could see that going either way (hey it was a harmless text, don't sweat it). As for noticing laughter, they probably used a laughing emoji. The whole thing seems more harmless now that I'm understanding the group text context better but yes still questionable judgement. As far as branding a kid a jerk or a thief. I think that was done after multiple interactions, not one? So if your child stole candy multiple times, yes, it's possible that other parents might whisper to each other, "keep an eye on this one, she might steal from you" or such. It wouldn't surprise me. And no, people shouldn't get stuck with a label just because of something that happened at age five.

We already live in that world... go laugh at the scene of an accident or something and see how that goes. Face it, there's a time and place for everything. To you it would diffuse a situation, fair enough. To me, I couldn't get over the darkness in the movie Kobo (I made a thread about that) and most people were unfazed about the witches threatening to pluck the boy's eyes out! I found it extremely disturbing. But, I've also had a chemical burn and a papercut in my eye which maybe intensified my defensiveness about content with eye injuries. I was greatly disturbed by a couple other movies for similar reasons. These movie makers must know it's disturbing. In short, you're allowed to do whatever you like, but you might be judged for it. Just like every time I post on this thread I know people are judging me.

you guys are bold LOL. I think I'm more of a 3 day rule person...

Yeah, we don't know. I'm just saying that if you're not friends with someone then rude and/or mean things are not seen as funny or even necessarily acceptable. They are seen as rude and/or mean. Saying, "my eyeballs are on fire I'm so mad" is way different than, "You're driving me nuts, I want to light your eyes on fire." Yes, this child may not be able to have the judgement to discern that. I guess we can give him a pass. I was picking on the parents because they laughed at the matter in front of the parents of the other child. Laugh in the privacy of your home or with other friends if you want... but at least don't do it in front of the parents of the child that was upset. I don't even know how this happened, guess they are all linked on facebook or something.

Seriously lol. My hair is almost jet black. Those white/gray hairs stick out like a sore thumb.

The tone when saying something really outrageous is what makes it sound potentially malicious. That and the relationship. Since they don't seem to have a good relationship and the child was probably actually angry, not saying something like, "I'm so hungry I could eat a horse!" it doesn't put it in the same category as the two friends on the basketball court exchanging smack talk.

It may or may not affect how safe she feels. Like someone else said, she's probably going to have trouble returning to work if it happened there. A couple nuns from my church were stabbed to death last year. It was very upsetting to the whole community. Still don't know the motive, we just speculated. Anyway, it really messed with me and how safe I felt even though they caught the guy within a fairly short amount of time. I spoke to a couple professionals about it and basically realized I had survivor's guilt (I dreamt about being stabbed to death a few days before it happened). Just talk to her. Who knows what she's thinking.

Live a few hours without snacks. Speak for yourself. ;) OP, your purse class sounds fun and you did a good job.

Maybe it was the "best" option thing that bothered him. To him it's not the best option. That's probably all a matter of opinion but both of you are maybe hearing it presented as fact. "Very much needed" may be an opinion but could sound like it's stated as fact. Perhaps both of you should work on "I" statements. "I think this is what is needed." "I don't think that's the best option, Mom." Or whatever.

Weird, this showed up in my newsfeed on FB and had a thumbnail image of underwear. See number 16. http://www.providr.com/now/things-you-didnt-know-about-objects/15/?utm_source=fbkxd&utm_medium=object_d_a Basically, they are saying that the pairs that don't have the sewn edge were done that way because the sewn edge is uncomfortable. I don't believe everything on this list so take it with a grain of salt.

Don't ask him to repeat himself. You could simply ask, "do you think I missed something?" without asking him to repeat. I think just asking him to repeat implies, "I wasn't really listening" even if that is not the case or it just makes him tired of talking because he feels like a broken record. That's my take, anyway.

I have mixed feelings on leggings. I personally feel naked wearing them in public as pants, but I see lots of women wear them... even at ds' school which sorta surprised me just because I wouldn't think to wear leggings as pants to a job. It's so common though I don't think much of it anymore. Mostly long flowy tops are paired with them and boots. Dh got me a sweater dress for Christmas. It stops right below my butt. I tried it on with leggings. I felt sooooo naked. I don't know if I could ever leave the house wearing that without feeling like I'm wearing a mini skirt. Forget about trying to walk with my toddler, I'd have to lean down to hold her hand and worry about looking inappropriate, like my butt is sticking out. I could wear it as a top with jeans, but my jeans aren't slim fit so I can't wear my dress boots over them. It's similar to this without slits on the sides: http://www.target.com/p/women-s-long-sleeve-cowl-neck-side-slit-pullover-kit-sky/-/A-52079071

Thank you. I was told I was "too sensitive" my whole life, even from my own father. Later he's the one that picked up the book The Highly Sensitive Person and read it and then let me have his copy. It's aggravating to go your whole life treated like you're defective because of it. I cannot handle certain imagery but it's not because I need to be conditioned or something. I think it's just because it's how I was born. The Walking Dead is one of my favorite shows, but I know my limits and leave the room or close my eyes if it's too intense. The sensitivity I referenced in the book is not limited to taking things to heart. It also affects ability to read a room. Some but not all HSP are empaths. I now understand why my sister has more trouble than me with certain situations.

And no, I don't think friends have to be similar in every way or let every topic affect their friendship, but it was the way in which you spoke about your friend and her children that made it sound like this person isn't such a close friend. If I was your friend I don't know if I'd want to be after reading a post about my family like that. It just sounded kind of harsh. And I don't think it's so much that highly worded hyperbole is unheard of... it's that it's being said by someone who has a history of acting jerky/isn't a close friend to the recipient.

It did sound like bullying that the OP described because everything she said implied to me that this child was rude and/or mean. Not playful banter between two friends. She maybe didn't really explain it was a running joke in the family. Just saying that it was something she was doing because someone hated it does not give the full picture you gave me about years of flamingos. I can see why the kids would not grasp it if she didn't elaborate. I never said I was against playful pranking. I don't know if you are under the assumption that I am. I never spoke about pranking anywhere in the thread.

"Mom's gonna kill you" seems like use of a common expression, whereas things like "light your eyeballs on fire" doesn't. It's more jarring when it's not commonly heard I think or can't be explained away as "just an expression." And of course context and even age of the speaker/recipient. Sounds like you can't stand this person's way of raising their kids or their kids. Hard to believe you find them tolerable enough to be your closest friend. Some of the things I bolded can be perceived as justification for bullying. "Toughen up, buttercup. Kids do these things" mentality. While I do agree that it seems extreme for a kid to cry everytime they are around other children joking, I wouldn't say that it's necessarily a good way to build friendships, either, just because it's how those particular kids choose to bond. The way you describe these parents makes me think you may want to pick up a copy of The Highly Sensitive Person by Elaine N. Aron. Sensitivity is a spectrum and some of us fall much closer to the other end. It doesn't mean we're weak or inferior or defective as so many people like to imply.

No, but I was reading the post as one train of thought... "his teacher sent home a note. Both parents laughed..." as if they laughed at their son getting a note sent home. But the laughing may have not been at the note at all, just what they did online. It's kind of hard to say.