if you have ever seen a large tent in the wind, you wouldn't ask. and its hard to get a light weight large tent. two tents can be carried by two people. we go with dome tents with at least three poles, preferably four, and latches to attach to poles, not sleeves. (max. size 4 person) if you can get an rei credit card, you get points for every dollar you spend. then at the end of the year, you have free points to buy things. we haven't paid money for camping gear in years. we put everything we can on the card, including phone bills, etc, to maximize what we have to spend. i would spend money on good quality gear in the following order: tent sleeping bag (down) back pack (our preference is for the light weight no frame packs.) good quality foamy. good pair of long johns. everything else is just fun ;) enjoy! ann

we are in SoCal high desert, where it can be 100 F by 10am. so our routine: up before 6. feed chickens and do outside chores by 7:30am. do one round of music practice swim at 9am. home by 10am. school, lunch, another round of music practice, more school, more music... and then the sun sets, and we can swim again and/or hang laundry out and/or eat dinner outside. then after dinner we drive for them to dance or play in an orchestra. hth, ann

you are right; it would be hard for a beginner to tell. teachers often ask students to bring an instrument to them before they pay money. also, many music stores will have a string person and will play for you. and there might be a conductor or local high school teacher who would love to shop with you. hth, ann

i treat them as if they were chicken and make turkey nuggets from them. and turkey stew. and turkey soup. and open faced turkey and gravy sandwiches. hth, ann

the peril is that with violins, its all about sound.... which comes from wood, and bacteria and shape and strings and bow and rosin and and and. two violins made by the same folks at roughly the same time out of the approx. the same wood can sound Very, very different. you can't tell that on line. flip side, is that for under a hundred dollars, you could try it and see, esp. if it is a place you could send the violin back to if it didn't turn out well. but there may well be folks out there like us who now have more violins than people, and would be happy to sell you the one they started on. once you find a teacher, they will know. its a joyous thing; i hope she loves it! ann

fwiw, we are in to violins in a big way. things to remember: a) a few good lessons at the beginning to get them started on the right track is invaluable b) used violins are usually better than new violins. i would never buy a violin i hadn't taken to a teacher, even though i've played for forty years. c) if you were stateside, i'd recommend sharmusic.com. they will send you instruments and bows to try. if you buy one, there is no charge. i don't know if they work internationally or not. d) musicians are remarkably generous. someone will steer you in the right direction if you ask. e) buying instruments over the internet is fraught with peril. most music stores have rental instruments that you can then buy if you decide to go that route. we are now into multiple thousands spent on each instrument, and bows.... but in the beginning, we started with a simple rental for one dd, and a hand me down violin for the other. hth, ann

i think you did a lovely thing, that has become all too rare. forty years ago, everyone did it, and so there was a common courtesy already established and regularly practiced and therefore generally known. now is not then. now, we do polite things because of who we are, not because it will be returned, or even acknowledged. so i'd encourage you to keep doing it, but to let go the expectation of gracious behavior reciprocated. then, if it is, you can be pleasantly surprised. fwiw, ann

http://nhpr.org/post/mix-gut-microbes-may-play-role-crohns-disease we've talked about ibs, ulcerative colitis and crohn's on this board. this study published this week is Very Promising.... off to take my VSL#3 ;) ann

we have a twelve year gap between dd#2 and dd#3. we quite quickly had dd#4 so that they would have buddies when the older two left home. they are all quite close. its a different relationship than between the pairs of dds, and a lovely added dimension. the thing that struck me was that i was already to the point of being able to do more things i was interested in, and then suddenly was back to b*st feeding, nappies, and naps. that was a hard switch for me personally. but i can't imagine life without the younger two. i am a more steady mom for them, having gained some experience ;) ann

if you have an emergency option that is attached to a hospital (i'm thinking of kaiser hospitals), then its worth an extra drive to go there. they have everything you might need. i think you are in a timezone later than mine, so hope you have already gone! ann

this.... a thousand times this..... many, many times tastier than any alfredo sauce i have ever, ever had.... here's one thing you can do with it: (and it includes the sauce recipe. http://pinchofyum.com/veggie-alfredo-lasagna but unbelievably, the three ingredients are garlic, olive oil and cauliflower. the recipe calls for us to use the water the cauliflower was cooked in, but if you just add 1/4 cup of fresh hot water, then there is absolutely no cauliflower taste at all. i read all the rave reviews, and doubted. i doubt no more ;) ann

now, i have never been here, but i think it looks wonderful! http://www.komandoo.com/ i tried googling top honeymoon spots, and so many wonderful places came up! have a glorious time! ann

we often start after evening classes get out, and drive up to six hours, then throw sleeping bags on the ground and sleep til sun-up and then start driving again. it gives us an extra day. we cannot drive without stopping, as while dh can nap in the car in a way that improves his reaction time, i become a zombie..... fwiw, ann

my favourite would be here: http://www.waterfallgardens.com/about_peace_lodge.ph (recently voted one of the top honeymoon spots outside the usa) or here: http://www.monkeymia.com.au/pages/1501/monkey-mia-research or here: http://www.fairmont.com/banff-springs/ they are my top three favourite places of all time. there is something about the combination of nature, good food and luxury.... we actually camped at monkey mia, but stayed in the hotel at the peace lodge. we have visited the banff springs hotel, but haven't stayed their. our son in law took our dd there for an anniversary though :) historically minded, rome, venice, paris, london, etc.... oh what a wonderful problem to have ;) ann

i'm sorry :(. reaching out is Very Good. if you are in a university town, taking in boarders is a fast way to add income. i did it for several of the tightest years. the boarders WERE my food and gas income. dog sitting/house sitting can work, too. re health care: you can go on the website and see what it offers you without committing to buy anything. are you do for a tax refund? this might be a year to file earlier rather than later if that is true. my heart goes out to you. ann

i keep remembering things. we have only been to yellowstone in the winter. it is one of the places where we hired a guide from outside the park, who picked us up in the dark one morning, and he did all the driving. he had wildlife scopes, etc. he also had a truck that was higher off the ground so we had better sight lines, and the roof opened so we could stand up and see things. the driving can be stressful, with all the other drivers and the bison, and this way dh could take photos to his heart's content. we also ended up hooking up with wolf researchers, so spent some fair amount of time looking thru scopes at wolves, wolf kills, wolf scat, etc, etc. another time we took a group tour into the park, and i will not do that again. it took forever, and we saw very little. (but we did see old faithful in the snow, which was the purpose of the whole thing. but those sno cats vibrate dreadfully, are loud, loud, loud, and take forever. hth, ann

so i just googled "least busy day of the week to visit yellowstone" and all sorts of links came up. it seems wednesday is THE busiest day, and that weekends are better, and that early in the morning is better than later in the day. (i would guess this is because people get up, have breakfast, drive, etc.) this might be one place where springing for a hotel in the park is worth it. many folks will be arriving mid morning, and leaving late afternoon, and you can be there the whole time. hth, ann

one word: tent. inexpensive, flexible, familiar so kids sleep better (they are sleeping in the same place every night, its just that the same place - the inside of the tent - is in a new place.), control over food and timing of meals, and way more flexibility... and no bedbugs :) we do driving trips a lot. i block out where we might be each night, and for how many nights. because we camp, we travel with food, so i don't need food destinations, but as i'm reading, i take note of special food experiences we might have. (eg. lobster supper at a church on Prince Edward Island) i read about things to see and do. i make lists. then i block out all sorts of things. eg. for the summer of 2013, we were on the road for three weeks in Eastern Canada. we decided our main focus would be a week on PEI, so it became the middle week. i researched about two weeks worth of things to do, including outdoor things, historical things, artsy things, sciencey things, foody things. then i looked at campgrounds in a good location for most of these things. i didn't book anything. then i booked tickets for the play we wanted to see. i looked at days for the lobster supper, for a ceilidh, etc, etc. so i had a rough idea of what we wanted to do, but we had the flexibility to match activities to weather and mood. then i blocked out the first week, so we ended up in PEI when we hoped. i found potential campgrounds for each night, a "near" one, a "far" one and a "middle" one. this is because one never knows about weather, traffic, health, etc, etc. i knew we wanted to be near the new brunswick flower pots for at least two days, with a potential third day, so day three was a long driving day. then i did the same for the final week. but then, on the ferry back from PEI, we discovered that the Rankin Family Pub was only three hours from where the ferry docked. so we just ditched the plan for the third week, and turned left off the ferry. it was glorious. so then we had two huge driving days to get back to toronto, where we were flying out from. but the planning made it possible. now all that said, both dh and i are "nfp"s... we do best when we have the freedom to be spontaneous. however, when i travel with my intj mom, she books a hotel for each night. our deal is that if before 3pm, i discover somewhere else i'd rather stay, we call the other one and cancel it. even my mom says "a plan is so you know what you are changing from" ;) hth, ann eta: however, for our costa rica trip, i planned and booked everything; we had work things that had to happen at specific times. even with that, part way thru we discovered that we really could stay at the arenal observatory, so made arrangements for that and ditched other things. and we stayed at la selva longer, way longer, because the girls befriended entomologist researchers, and dh go roped into finding snakes for other researchers at night. and then, 27 days into the month long trip, we realized we were done, discovered we could move our flights without charge, and just ditched the last few days of the trip. so i guess all that is a really long way of saying i like to know what's possible, and i like to do the planning that keeps the important things possible, and i need to be able to "go with the flow" when new and exciting things happen.

i should have said that. i just add the brown sugar and omit the granulated sugar. hth, ann

hope it all went/is going well! hugs, ann

well, fwiw, i find the expression "how would you like to proceed?" to be very, very useful. to the head of the organization: how would you like to proceed? would you like to sit in on a meeting? would you like the mother invovled to sit in on a meeting? would you like me to resign? to the mother: how would you like to proceed? would you like to sit in on a meeting? would you like to volunteer to work with me? would you like me to resign? this situation looks possible for this approach, as you aren't sure whether you wish to continue volunteering or not. fwiw, ann

yes, you do. but it is more like a diary. eg. "dc skinned his knee bike riding today. bike and dc are both fine ;)" it is more a record of the child's life that gets shared with everyone. and that is its value, too. for more practical arrangements, an online calendar is great; but that is not what the notebook is about. fwiw, ann

so sorry that surgery was delayed so long.... but the thought of peppermint tea by the fireplace made me smile :) ann

yes, yes, yes.... sets of everything you can would be great! another thing that can help is a notebook, where things that happen during the week can be mentioned, and it travels with the child/children. regular email/facebook would work for communication, but everything being all together in a book seems to help emotionally. has she complained about the current schedule? is that why you are switching it? or ??? good luck, ann

i am carrying you in my heart. i am glad you talked. :grouphug: ann