fingers crossed! hope the chat with the old neighbor goes well!!! farming is not an easy path forward, but it is a path, and has the advantage of being next door to your folks! ann

yes.... this.... except CNN makes me a bit nuts.... so i tend towards one australian source, too. ann

lol... well, i was a canada mom, and now i'm a usa mom. things we had to learn to do when we moved here: a) lock our house b) lock our car c) when the police stop you in the car, make sure the interior light is on, and put your hands on the steering wheel d) "no" doesn't mean "no", it just means you haven't asked the right way yet. when a canadian librarian, for example, says no that isn't possible, she means it. when a california librarian says no that isn't possible, it just means that i haven't asked the right way, or haven't insisted or.... (ie. it typically means she'd rather not, rather than it isn't possible. its a generalization, but i remember being astonished at my dh continuing to ask about something someone had just said no to.... until i realized it worked.) things we had to unlearn: a) walking b) walking alone c) teenage girls doing just about anything unaccompanied. d) honking at someone who had just done something inappropriate, like cutting someone else off, or as a warning that they were about to change lanes into someone. e) taking public transportation f) parenting other people's kids. in ottawa, whichever adult was nearest would often deal with whatever needed doing (eg. reminding a child to wait his turn at a playground). here, not so much (really, not at all). g) talking politics. back in ottawa, we talked politics alllll the time, amongst friends with wildly diverse political leanings. here, that is a recipe for disaster. our oldest was in grade 9 when we moved here. she was accustomed to going out to lunch with her friends from school one day a week during the school day. hmmmm.... not here. she was used to going to the movies on the bus at night with her friends. hmmm... a) no bus, b) girls alone at night - ummm, no not sure what you are looking for, but that is a beginning....

:grouphug: :grouphug: :grouphug: it sounds like its been a rough few weeks. i'm sorry. ulcers are way more treatable than they used to be, so at least now you know what it is, you can actually do something about it! hope you feel way better really soon! ann

just popped in to have coffee with you and see how you all were doing. hope its going as well as it can! ann

it all sounds very adventurous from this side of the pond, but i am so glad to be living it vicariously and not in real life..... hope it passes the second time round. ann

hope today went really well! hugs to you all, ann

this is us, five nights a week, due to violin and dance. breakfast is our together meal, and i cook something for it each morning. lunch is the kids and i. dinner is a "get your own when you need it". i have lots of things available. sometimes we do something at panera when many of us are free briefly when in town. sometimes, i have soup or salad ready for whoever would like it. but typically breakfast is the big meal, lunch is the medium meal, and dinner is a yoghurt parfait or hummus and pita in the car on the way somewhere. at least twice a week, dh and i cook together and have a "date" night. its actually a pretty healthy way to do it. then at 10pm when everyone is home, fruit and/or veggies are the order of the day. hth, ann

what is this thing you call an i-phone? ;) i must confess i really, really want one, but it is still in the "unnecessary expense" column for me. sigh.... i wish i weren't so realistic some days. really. but my non-smart phone works really well, and whenever i would NEED to use things on an iphone, dh is with me with his. but oh how i want one. silly, really, but there it is.... ann

hope today goes really, really well! lucille packard is wonderful.

fwiw, dh has a number of techniques he uses with dmil. one is: "yup, that's me, i'm such a liar/thief/lay about/disappointment. how about those Leafs?" another is: "Meet your needs." a long time ago, we did decide to not let unkind things about people not present go unchallenged. for those, one of us will say: " how unkind. that's not the way i remember it at all. how about those Leafs?" " I don't remember that that way at all. so and so is a wonderful x, y, z. how about those Leafs?" followed by, "would you like a cup of tea?" so what it is is a one sentence dismissal/refusal to acknowledge followed by a subject changer. the offer of tea is to remove me from the situation to boil the kettle. if i don't leave, i run the risk of engaging further, which is inevitably a mistake. and fwiw, we don't ever change plans for her.... because its not about the plans, its about having power over us, and i'm not playing. good luck, ann

i tried googling ymca easter day camp, and lots of the ymca's have info online. i don't know where you are, but looking at a few may give you a clue. my hunch is that nothing except craft materials would be provided, so for tomorrow maybe pack a towel (and a plastic bag for wet towel and bathing suit to come home in), and lunch and snacks. hth, ann eg. here's a link to mission valley's camp http://www.missionvalley.ymca.org/programs/camp/policies.html and here's what houston's camp has to say about what they will need there: SWIMMING AND WATER ACTIVITIES Campers will need appropriate swimwear (one piece swimsuit for girls and basic swim trunks for boys), a towel, goggles if desired and sunscreen. Spray sunscreen and swim shoes are recommended. No water wings, inner tubes or other inflatable devices are allowed in Y pools. All campers will be swim tested daily to determine their swimming ability. Five-year-olds do not participate in recreational swim. DAILY CAMPER NEEDS - Healthy Snacks/Lunch - Water Bottle (Must Have) - Towel - Spray Sunscreen - Comfortable Play Clothes - Bug Spray - Cap/Visor - Good Attitude - Swimsuit (Girls must wear a one - Close-Toed/Close-Heeled piece bathing suit. Boys must wear Athletic Shoes basic swim trunks.) Campers Do Not Need: - Cell Phones - Make Up - Electronic Devices - iPods or MP3 Players - Toys/Stuffed Animals - Bad Attitude - Money - Weapons - Trading Cards - Jewelry

Very Big Smile! I"m glad the day manager was able to help :).... and help enough that it made a difference. ann

it was just like any other Friday night. I walked into the sanctuary of our church to run a wedding rehearsal. Except this Friday night, a man with the most amazing eyes was the brother of the bride, and one of the ushers. I walked back to my office giving myself a talking to: "We are all God's children. I will treat everyone with God's love and kindness. My goodness his soul shines thru his eyes." etc etc. The next day was just like every Saturday. I conducted the worship which is a wedding, and then went to the reception and sat with the family. Except this Saturday the brother of the bride talked to me non stop for three hours. What I didn't know at the time was that that was more than his family had heard him say at one time in his life..... we lived in different countries, so there was lots of email and phone calls that were simply friends being supportive. and then two years later he came back to celebrate a wedding anniversary, and we were engaged. smiling on a saturday morning....

i am glad you called and tried to find a way forward. it is hard on our kids (and us) when real world considerations get in the way of joyous things. one of the things i value about this forum is that people WON'T just agree with me if they think i'm off base. sometimes IRL people won't be honest because they are afraid of losing a relationship with someone. here, people will say what they really think. i value that, because i learn things. eg. i learned things from this thread that i hadn't thought of. i am off to research insurance riders for instruments; our car insurance won't come close to covering the two violins and viola i drive around with..... and they are pre professional instruments! i can't imagine the professional cost, really i can't. (well, i can, but i have my hands over my ears, going la la la) ann

hoping you are able to have this move forward in a timely fashion; it will be so nice for her not to be in pain!! have a wonderful weekend, ann

from a routine perspective, having each day the same can be very helpful for kids. and you won't ever be as exhausted as you will be in day 4 and 5 of 12 hour shifts. with the 11-7, you can get up, make breakfast, do school, set work for them, head in to work, come home and have dinner and tuck them in. every night. that would be how i would roll. ymmv, ann eta: if its the 11-7am shift, that could be lovely from a work perspective, and again allows you to develop a home schedule that is consistent. you could get home, have breakfast with them, get them started on work, and then either sleep then or after lunch. i'm still liking it ;)

:grouphug: :grouphug: :grouphug: and prayers... ann

i pm'd you.

i know for some conferences that the organizing team makes arrangements with certain hotels at a significant discount. it might be good to find out if this competition is doing that. it could make a huge difference in cost! hth, ann

if you have no allergies, then sure. however, when you check in, ask for a non smoking room and see what happens. someone who reserved one may have had plans change. and if it is really ghastly, ask for a different room and see what happens. in the end, you are paying them money to provide a service, and there WILL be an available unsmokey room, the question is how to ask for it in a way they can say yes. or you may open the door and it will be just fine. fwiw ann if you can go online now and see if a nonsmoking room is available for the time you are staying, and there is one, then you can call and ask them to give you that room instead. it may work. it is in their best interest to have a happy customer.

here is a site that ranks hospitals. pediatric stanford is ranked nationally in 9 specialties. http://health.usnews.com/best-hospitals/area/ca/lucile-salter-packard-childrens-hospital-at-stanford-6933605 so is UCSF http://health.usnews.com/best-hospitals/area/ca/ucsf-benioff-childrens-hospital-PA6930043 so for example for urology, stanford is 24 nationally, and ucsf is 28.... so i am thinking that they both seem to be quite good. hth, ann

i will ask emt dd in the bay area which she thinks. i know that inlaws and daughter's inlaws all choose stanford hospital over anything else, but they are seniors.

do you cut your own hair? does he watch? if so, i would say go for it. if not, i would probably still say go for it. you have a child who wants to learn how to do something. ummmm..... yes. i am the same way about cooking. when they want to cook, usually somewhere around age 3, we go for it. they spend time in the kitchen with me, and then we pick a day when they get to cook. we shop, we have a recipe, and i hang out in the kitchen while they cook. sometimes its ghastly, sometimes its okay, occasionally it is spectacular. and then i make sure we do it again, so they can incorporate what they learned. i would do that with this, too. he's making at least a two hair cut commitment, maybe three ;). i would use it as a mini teaching time. you want to do something. what do you do to make sure the outcome is as good as it can be? (i'm thinking youtube videos, etc). you can both learn. or, you can find a barber willing to give him a one hour lesson. this might calm the mothers down. (a pro is involved.) he can practice in the barber shop on you ;). really. (this is also a good discerning point for you. if you are willing to let him cut your hair then it is a clue that you are willing to let him cut his own hair. flip side is that if you panic, its a clue that it may not be a good idea ;) ie. i would encourage him on this path. i would walk it with him. i would NOT just hand him the clippers. fwiw, ann

being military and moving is different than just about anything else. the one thing that is the same is that i try to be fully present and not disengage until i am getting on a plane. an old military habit that still remains: at each season, i pack away decorations as if they are going to be moved before the next year rolls around. i was very sad after the first military move when the christmas ornaments were almost all broken. and most of my earrings are still in ice cube trays, so they can be quickly saran wrapped and moved.... and i haven't moved in 17 years now!!! a habit i developed and still have is to visit things in the area where i live whenever i can, and not put it off for another day. and i use flylady for decluttering, even yet. it just makes everything easier. so i guess what i would do at this point would be to try to develop all the good housekeeping habits i wish i had, decluttering, sorting thru clothes, etc, etc. and enjoy my friends and area with new keenness .... hth, ann