Peela Posted March 30, 2009 Share Posted March 30, 2009 My ds13 is driving me crazy. He argues over everything. He has opinions- strong opinions- about things he just doesn't know much about at all. If we try to reason with him, show him why he is wrong- he just defends. He is not much interested in the logic, in the truth- just in defending his opinion. Now I can see why a logic program is a good idea! This kid needs to learn how to think- he is so arrogantly opinionated and usually wrong! And, he wont shut up. He needs to tell me every detail of what he is interested in. And he still wants to be kissed and cuddled in bed at night before he can go to sleep. And he holds my hand in public. But you wouldn't call him a sissy at all. It would be cute if he would just stop talking for a little while. I am not that interested in the finer details of explosives! And I am feeling my space is invaded a lot. I dont want to push him away emotionally, but maybe nature creates this set up so that the parent pushes the kid away? I mean, ever seen those lion documentaries where the lion bites her own kitten when she gets annoyed? I feel like that! I remember TWTM saying this is the argumentative stage. Wel, my dd never really has been argumentative. I never felt a clear "Logic stage" with her at all. I wondered when it would happen for years, then I realised it had already happened. The transition was easy. I have never before been so irritated by my own child, and I don't like it. Dh and I are discussing it and setting boundaries and dealing with the stuff that needs reigning in, like just being plain rude and out of line, unhelpful etc...but a lot of it seems like he is plain arrogant and so sure of himself, when it is completely unjustified! Can anyone relate. I am sure this will pass. I hope so. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Night Elf Posted March 30, 2009 Share Posted March 30, 2009 LOL, yeah I can relate. Unfortunately, I have no suggestions or advice. Just :grouphug::grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Remudamom Posted March 30, 2009 Share Posted March 30, 2009 Oh man, am I laughing. Our two 15 yr olds drive me up the wall informing me about guns, explosives, and all things military/terrorist/hunting. I run away screaming with my fingers in my ears. They are just a little arrogant, the thing they do that really makes me nuts is laugh at me for being uninterested. They want to discuss what they call "these historic times" but really all they want to do is talk about what country is threatening what other country and who has the most weapons. Have you ever seen the movie "Big Fat Liar"? (cute movie) There's a scene with two teenagers trying to get an adult to see things their way, and everytime the kids start talking the adult puts his fingers in his ears and says "deet deet deet deet deet" really fast to drown them out. That's what I've begun to do to the boys anytime they rant on about their obsessions. Makes them laugh and keeps me sane. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zoraida Posted March 30, 2009 Share Posted March 30, 2009 Yes, and the older they get, the worst they get. Blessings Zoriada Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tammyla Posted March 30, 2009 Share Posted March 30, 2009 :grouphug: My almost 12 yold is ah, ;)... Interesting, argumentative, loving and I've no worry he'll become a push over. That's a good thing...right. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
imeverywoman Posted March 30, 2009 Share Posted March 30, 2009 I tell her often, that if she doesn't grow up to be a lawyer, she'll have missed her calling in life. Paid to argue. Hmmm. Sounds like a plan. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
skaterbabs Posted March 30, 2009 Share Posted March 30, 2009 Sounds like my eldest. (13 in July.) Argues about EVERYTHING, and is convinced he's the formost expert about everything. Drives me BATTY! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MamaT Posted March 30, 2009 Share Posted March 30, 2009 Oh yes, this is what it looks like. I have two in that stage right now and even though I would like to plug my ears and run, I listen. I want to keep them talking to me about what matters to them. If I listen to the unimportant stuff (how to make a really neat bomb-ds, anything about Taylor Swift-dd), hoping they will keep talking to me about the important stuff. I did this with my two older boys, and we have great communication. They still talk to me about what's going on in their life. JMHO. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WTMCassandra Posted March 30, 2009 Share Posted March 30, 2009 Argues about EVERYTHING, and is convinced he's the formost expert about everything. Oh joy. My DS has been like this since he could talk. We have sometimes told him that he was BORN in the pert stage. So I guess the moral of this story is that I need to expect this for the loooooong haul, seeing as he's only 10. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Murphy101 Posted March 30, 2009 Share Posted March 30, 2009 yep. sounds familiar to me too oldest boy is 14, second boy is nearly 13, and then there's the just turned 11 yr old 3rd boy. Lord Have Mercy on us all.:D:grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WTMCassandra Posted March 30, 2009 Share Posted March 30, 2009 *long sigh* Since I only have one boy, I have no one to compare him to. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
skaterbabs Posted March 30, 2009 Share Posted March 30, 2009 Oh joy. My DS has been like this since he could talk. We have sometimes told him that he was BORN in the pert stage. So I guess the moral of this story is that I need to expect this for the loooooong haul, seeing as he's only 10. Prettymuch. :glare: DS #1 has been argumentative since he could talk, and it hasn't gotten better since puberty began. :p Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
G5052 Posted March 30, 2009 Share Posted March 30, 2009 I have two of them at home (one is actually a little younger technically, but her hormones are obviously raging), and a group of them at co-op. They're capable of arguing over the silliest things and being blunt to a fault, but you gotta love them. They truly need us though to help them work through it at times, but I do find myself mentally exhausted in this stage. You truly have to draw a line at times and not allow them to step over, just like we did in toddlerhood but over different issues. And at times you just have to let them thrash around in all of it themselves. ;) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
unsinkable Posted March 30, 2009 Share Posted March 30, 2009 I can honestly say that I thought my children had that persistent, constantly questioning, relentless personality since birth...I used to say they better be researchers or prosecuting attorneys or any career that would benefit some one who just.can't.take.no.for.an.answer. Well, then my ds has entered that boy stage that Peela describes and it makes those childhood days look like...well, childhood, comparatively. :tongue_smilie: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Melissa in Australia Posted March 31, 2009 Share Posted March 31, 2009 I have found it really helpful to start studying logic formally at this stage. the more they argue, the more logic I scheduled in. I have one child doing logic every day. it really turns their arguing toward something else.. picking fallacies in everything I say instead! at least I know what I am teaching is sinking in. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Murphy101 Posted March 31, 2009 Share Posted March 31, 2009 I can honestly say that I thought my children had that persistent, constantly questioning, relentless personality since birth...I used to say they better be researchers or prosecuting attorneys or any career that would benefit some one who just.can't.take.no.for.an.answer. Well, then my ds has entered that boy stage that Peela describes and it makes those childhood days look like...well, childhood, comparatively. :tongue_smilie: :iagree: I too felt a need to buy a logic curriculum at this point with this both annoying and satisfying result::lol: it really turns their arguing toward something else.. picking fallacies in everything I say instead! at least I know what I am teaching is sinking in. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Christine Posted March 31, 2009 Share Posted March 31, 2009 And, he wont shut up. He needs to tell me every detail of what he is interested in. And he still wants to be kissed and cuddled in bed at night before he can go to sleep. And he holds my hand in public. "Grass is always greener" I get the arguments, but rarely will my eldest tell me anything he's interested in (I have to drag it out of him); and I'd love it if I could get a single hug at the end of the day; but, I'm generally counting those by months. . . Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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