dorothy Posted January 1, 2009 Share Posted January 1, 2009 My ds5 walks like a girl. He is not trying to. He just does. Maybe it's because he identifies too much with two older sisters? Anyway, I do not know what to do. It is not a problem now because he is young and at home. (I know that if he was in school he would eventually be teased about this). BUT, how can I help him? Other adults have started to point this out to me, so now I am worried. He is very boyish in all other ways: active, loves sports, plays soldiers, cowboys, knights, etc. He is not girlie in any way - he just walks like a girl. :glare: Please help! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Snickerdoodle Posted January 1, 2009 Share Posted January 1, 2009 What does that mean, "walk like a girl"? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
klmama Posted January 1, 2009 Share Posted January 1, 2009 If it's something you are concerned about, teach him to walk "like a boy," whatever that means to you. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stacey in MA Posted January 1, 2009 Share Posted January 1, 2009 If you have concerns about how normal are the MECHANICS of his walk for a boy who's his age, I would ask a pediatrician and work out those worries. But if it's just a stero-typing thing (or "he's different" thing), I think you really have to leave it alone and learn to accept it. He will change it when he's ready, when he notices, when he cares - or not. I know it may be hard to see something that is "different" about your child, but he will manage (and you too!) But in the grand scheme of things, it doesn't effect the core of his life - his values, morals, beliefs, life choices, etc. Hang in there! and GL.... - Stacey in MA Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Danestress Posted January 1, 2009 Share Posted January 1, 2009 I can't think of exactly what "walks like a girl" means unless it's the prancy, tip toe walking thing. Sometimes there is a medical reason for that - I had a friend whose son needed a lot of physical therapy to avoid surgery for this. So if that's what you mean, you might want to talk to his pediatrician. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alessandra Posted January 1, 2009 Share Posted January 1, 2009 I'm not sure what you mean by "walks like a girl" -- toe-walking? If it is pronounced and worries you, you could ask your pediatrician for a physical therapy eval. Some kids have tight tendons in the back of their legs and respond well to gentle stretching exercises. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dorothy Posted January 1, 2009 Author Share Posted January 1, 2009 I am telling you that numerous adults have pulled me aside to point it out. He will get teased if we do not get this under control. (By the way, I do not walk that way and do not know where he got this). DH has a very manly walk.. We have told him to look at Daddy and walk that way. He says OK then gets really stiff in his upper body and still swings his hips - A LOT. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
klmama Posted January 1, 2009 Share Posted January 1, 2009 I am telling you that numerous adults have pulled me aside to point it out. He will get teased if we do not get this under control. (By the way, I do not walk that way and do not know where he got this). DH has a very manly walk.. We have told him to look at Daddy and walk that way. He says OK then gets really stiff in his upper body and still swings his hips - A LOT. Has he been checked out by a doctor to see if there is something wrong with bone structure or musculature? Hypotonia? Hemorroids? Just grasping at straws here, but if he really isn't doing it on purpose, and can't do it the typical way even when he tries, I have to wonder if there is a physical problem that is causing it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chris in VA Posted January 1, 2009 Share Posted January 1, 2009 I'd take him to your pediatrician and have him evaluated. If he sends you to an PT, could you afford a few visits? If he is not walking correctly mechanically, it could cause a lot of trouble further down the line. Perhaps his tendons are loose around his hips. If nothing is wrong, you might try something like horseback riding or fencing to strengthen his little body. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
abbeyej Posted January 1, 2009 Share Posted January 1, 2009 I'm a little confused as to what you mean, but one thing I would try, if I were concerned as you seem to be... Play some "silly walks" games with him. "Walk like a soldier!" "Walk like a cowboy!" "Walk like a frog!" "Walk like you're wading through jello!" "Walk backwards!" "Walk like a crab!" You and his sisters can do it too. Just be silly. Walk on your heels. Walk on a line on the ground, heels coming down right in front of your toes. Hop. It'll start to give you an idea whether there's something physical limiting the ways he walks, or it's just a habit he has picked up. You might also see if there's a physical activity he could become involved in with other boys his age (or a mixed group with at least half boys participating). Soccer, t-ball, homeschool P.E. class, even a martial arts class (though I'm thinking that for your purposes, something that involves more running might be preferable). Something that will get him moving (and preferably working on speed -- it's tough to have an exaggerated walking style while running for speed!) and train him in control over his own body. But I wouldn't worry excessively over "girlishness" in his walk or "over-identifying with his sisters". Just give him the chance to exercise his body and rule out that there are any physical causes of us unusual walking style. (And, of course, if you notice evidence that there *are* physical causes making him move in a certain, unusual way, it would be worth discussing with your pediatrician and seeking out treatment or physical therapy as appropriate.) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tree House Academy Posted January 1, 2009 Share Posted January 1, 2009 It may just be a habit. My older son has a problem with his achiles heel and he started walking on his tip toes when barefoot. OMG it drives us all CRAZY! It looks like he is wearing high-heels. I am taking him back to the doc for x-rays on his heel , but I honestly think the heel is fine now and this is just a habit. Some boys are just more "feminine" than others. I am sure it is concerning, but this very well could be the case with your son. My 5 year old runs like someone has a string in his belly button pulling him forward. He reminds me of Phoebe on Friends. But I am not concerned. Now, if he runs this way when he is 15, well....LOL I will tell him not to run in public, I guess. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JFSinIL Posted January 1, 2009 Share Posted January 1, 2009 Have a PT check him out before you rib him anymore about "walking like a girl" - it may well be he can NOT help it depending on bone structure/joints etc. One of my brother's sons, just 7 now, always held a swing with his arms twisted outwards, couldn't throw a ball, etc.....a doctor finally had an x-ray done and the kid's elbow joint was just about BACKWARDS!!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alaska Mom Posted January 1, 2009 Share Posted January 1, 2009 We have a really good PT here who can diagnose/treat problems by just watching you walk. I was having back problems from walking too straight (not enough swinging ;)). You may want to find a good PT and not make a big deal of it but just have him looked at. I'd be hesitant to try to adjust his walking on your own, you could create body alignment issues down the road. I'd be cautious and gentle with impacting his view of himself. Just my thoughts. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
abbeyej Posted January 1, 2009 Share Posted January 1, 2009 Just wanted to add: I agree *strongly* with others about not saying he "walks like a girl" or that he needs to "walk like a boy" or teasing it out of him. I can see nothing but damage coming from that particular approach (and I'm not sure that's what you're doing -- just saying if you're tempted, I'd steer well clear of that)... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Suzanne in ABQ Posted January 1, 2009 Share Posted January 1, 2009 Most girls I know don't swing their hips until they reach puberty. If he's swinging his hips, it's not that he's walking like a girl, at least not a five year old girl. I agree with the others that there may be a problem, scoliosis perhaps? I woudn't worry, but I'd have him checked out. Ask your ped. for a referral to a pediatric orthopedist. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dorothy Posted January 1, 2009 Author Share Posted January 1, 2009 For goodness sake! I have been very careful to NOT make hime feel bad about this and to try to help him model his father in a positive way , "Look at Daddy walk, OK, Let's walk like Daddy." I am coming here to discuss it openly to see if anyone has had experience with this. I have been around many little boys. I have another ds. I helped raise my nephew. There is something definitely feminine about this kid's walk and I don't know what to do. But, I have not made it into a deal with him and I am not afraid of him being a more "feminine" boy. I am thinking that if we do not help him, in a few years, he will be picked or be involved in some kind of to-do. I remember how "nice" little kids can be about this kind of thing. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Danestress Posted January 1, 2009 Share Posted January 1, 2009 is that it doesn't sound like he is walking "like a girl" because he has modeled himself on his sisters. Most girls don't swing their hips a lot until they are no long really "girls." I doubt encouraging to "walk like Daddy" is really going to help, because I doubt he feels in control of this. I would have him checked out by someone in sports medicine or orthopaedics to see if maybe there is something in his bone structure that is causing this gate. Ribbing or not, it's hard to be told to walk differently than what comes natural. I had an awkward gate as a child because my feet were extremely pronated. I can remember all the helpful encouragement to walk differently, but kids don't walk around focused on how they appear to others. They just walk/run/play and we WANT them to be able to do that without self-consciousness. I needed special physical therapy to grow and to walk differently. I felt bad about myself because I knew that people didn't approve of the way I walked (which was not graceful as a lady "should" be) but I didn't feel like I could control it. I still feel self-conscious about it, and if I were you, rather than spending time and energy trying to get him to fix his own walk, I would try to find out if there is a reason why he walks that way. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JudoMom Posted January 1, 2009 Share Posted January 1, 2009 For goodness sake! I have been very careful to NOT make hime feel bad about this and to try to help him model his father in a positive way , "Look at Daddy walk, OK, Let's walk like Daddy." I am coming here to discuss it openly to see if anyone has had experience with this. I have been around many little boys. I have another ds. I helped raise my nephew. There is something definitely feminine about this kid's walk and I don't know what to do. But, I have not made it into a deal with him and I am not afraid of him being a more "feminine" boy. I am thinking that if we do not help him, in a few years, he will be picked or be involved in some kind of to-do. I remember how "nice" little kids can be about this kind of thing. Was he a late walker? How's his coordination? My ds3 does a fair amount of hip swinging (actually, it's more like twisting or something), but he's got very loose joints. Since he didn't walk until he was 22 months we had him in to a pediatric orthopedist who pointed out his "loosey goosey" joints and blamed them for his late walking. Is it possible something similar is going on with your ds? I'd second having his pediatrician look at him. It could be something that physical therapy could help. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kalanamak Posted January 1, 2009 Share Posted January 1, 2009 Has he been checked out by a doctor to see if there is something wrong with bone structure or musculature? I agree. I don't want to sound alarmist, but there is a milder form of muscular dystrophy that make the thigh and upper arm muscles weaker, the calf compensates and the gait is not quite right, e.g. Go to a good peds, not the FP down the block. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kimber Posted January 1, 2009 Share Posted January 1, 2009 I don't know if this will help, but my ds9 did something similar. But I know that my son has loose joints. All of my kids have fallen arches. Anyway, my son was locking his knees, and I did ride him hard about it. I did not mention hips or girls, but I pointed out the knee locking everytime I noticed it. It's more laziness than femininity. I'd watch his knees. If I try to do an exaggerated feminine walk, I can feel my knees popping back. Hope that helps, Kimberly Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
beansprouts Posted January 1, 2009 Share Posted January 1, 2009 Has he been checked out by a doctor to see if there is something wrong with bone structure or musculature? Hypotonia? Hemorroids? Just grasping at straws here, but if he really isn't doing it on purpose, and can't do it the typical way even when he tries, I have to wonder if there is a physical problem that is causing it. I was wondering about scoliosis, though I admit I don't know much about it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TraceyS/FL Posted January 1, 2009 Share Posted January 1, 2009 I was wondering about scoliosis, though I admit I don't know much about it. I have 2 kids with it and they don't swing their hips - if it was from that, it would be very sever and noticeable with a shirt off (you can see my middle DDs even though she isn't "bad enough" for a brace yet). But i agree, a visit to the doctor is in order to rule out a physical cause. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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