Tricky question, would you be OK with this? For nighttime with a 5 year old bedwetter.

[MsTake]

Hey there all!

So, during Covid, we had a neighbor that closed her home daycare business, during the lockdown. As a result, she either donated or gave away most of her existing supplies. In addition, she was one of the overspenders (hoarders?) who bought up tons of supplies for herself, when things were still quite scarce.

Among these, she has boxes and boxes of diapers, some of which she's offered to give to us, if we'd help her shovel snow off her driveway in the winter. (something we likely would have done anyways).

Anyways, both of the boys are potty trained. But my youngest does actually still wear a pull-up at night, because he wakes up wet every night (regardless of what he's wearing) without fail. We're not too bothered by this, because he has a family history of this on my husband's side, and we've been told by the pediatrician not just kind of let him grow out of it on his own time. That's fine and all, but he is still at the stage where he's regularly soaking through pull-ups a few times a week. They fit fine, he's just a wriggler at night, and tends to sleep on his belly.

Getting back to my question...

Our neighbor has 3~ boxes of size 6 and 7 diapers (not pull-ups) that I'm about 95% certain would fit youngest just fine (he's worn the same kind in the past when we were on vacation with family and ran out of pull-ups). She offered to give them to us for free.

Do I take them? And attempt to convince DS to switch to wearing them at night, while he can still fit in them? Or should we simply pass and tell her she can donate them elsewhere? WWYD? 😲

[HomeAgain]

The way I see it, it turns out one of three ways:

1. You take them, try to get ds to wear them and he accepts.  All good.

2. You take them, ds doesn't wear them, and you pass them on to someone who can use them.

3. You pass, and she gives them to someone else.

 

Your end results overlap, but it all ends up the same way: eventually someone who needs them uses them.

[MsTake]

3 minutes ago, HomeAgain said:

The way I see it, it turns out one of three ways:

1. You take them, try to get ds to wear them and he accepts.  All good.

2. You take them, ds doesn't wear them, and you pass them on to someone who can use them.

3. You pass, and she gives them to someone else.

 

Your end results overlap, but it all ends up the same way: eventually someone who needs them uses them.

That was actually DH's thinking as well. I even think I know of a church that would accept them, even if already opened (unless that's changed since covid?)

He's not convinced they'll even be absorbent enough for DS overnight (they're NOT 'nighttime' specific diapers). But my biggest concern is that he'll lose it when he realizes they aren't pull-ups, and won't want anything to do with them.

He's not majorly shy about wearing pull-ups right now so much, but he does share a bedroom with our oldest...and I feel like he'd not be keen on wearing a 'baby' diaper around his brother so much. Could be totally wrong though. I'm trying to think how to break the subject with him tonight before bedtime.

[fairfarmhand]

2 minutes ago, MsTake said:

That was actually DH's thinking as well. I even think I know of a church that would accept them, even if already opened (unless that's changed since covid?)

He's not convinced they'll even be absorbent enough for DS overnight (they're NOT 'nighttime' specific diapers). But my biggest concern is that he'll lose it when he realizes they aren't pull-ups, and won't want anything to do with them.

He's not majorly shy about wearing pull-ups right now so much, but he does share a bedroom with our oldest...and I feel like he'd not be keen on wearing a 'baby' diaper around his brother so much. Could be totally wrong though. I'm trying to think how to break the subject with him tonight before bedtime.

I'd let him know that we have these available because they were free. They're basically the same thing as a pull up but they fasten at the sides. I would not mention that they were baby diapers. I would just say, "Oh, neighbor lady was giving these away. I thought you could use them." If he balks I would explore why. If he's worried about brother, I would mention that he can put them on in the bathroom and then put on his PJs so brother doesn't have to know anything about them. 

In many case with my kids, if I've been casual and nonchalant about things, they have been the same. If I approach something as if I'm worried or it's something to be upset about they tend to mirror that. YMMV.

[SKL]

I agree with letting him put them on discreetly.  Also, consider putting them on backwards to increase absorbency.

[MsTake]

1 hour ago, fairfarmhand said:

I'd let him know that we have these available because they were free. They're basically the same thing as a pull up but they fasten at the sides. I would not mention that they were baby diapers. I would just say, "Oh, neighbor lady was giving these away. I thought you could use them." If he balks I would explore why. If he's worried about brother, I would mention that he can put them on in the bathroom and then put on his PJs so brother doesn't have to know anything about them. 

In many case with my kids, if I've been casual and nonchalant about things, they have been the same. If I approach something as if I'm worried or it's something to be upset about they tend to mirror that. YMMV.

Somewhat ironically, big brother might actually know about this (although by now he might have forgotten). He was actually with DH when she approached to to ask if we wanted a few boxes of them. She's babysat for the boys on occasion, and knows our youngest wears pull-ups at night.

They're very close, as brothers go, and I'm all but certain that my oldest wouldn't be phased even slightly if his brother were to stroll into their room one evening with something on besides a pull-up. He's never ever given him a hard time over it (despite the fact that oldest stopped wetting overnight almost before he was even 2 😶).

[Corraleno]

If he's soaking through pull-ups and the free diapers aren't nighttime ones, would it be possible to put a diaper under a larger size pull-up for extra absorbency? Or is there a way to just use the absorbent part of the diaper inside a pull-up?

[MsTake]

18 minutes ago, Corraleno said:

If he's soaking through pull-ups and the free diapers aren't nighttime ones, would it be possible to put a diaper under a larger size pull-up for extra absorbency? Or is there a way to just use the absorbent part of the diaper inside a pull-up?

That's actually BRILLIANT!

Our biggest problem now (I think?) is due to him mostly sleeping on his stomach, so leaks tend to happen even before the pull-up is fully saturated. But it might be that if we could have multiple barriers, there could be less of a chance of a leak happening right away. Great idea!

 

I'll try and research a bit more if/how this could be done.

[Katy]

When DS6 was in that phase (also a stomach sleeper), a cousin of mine with similar aged stomach-sleeping boys recommended adding disposable absorbent pads from Amazon into the front of the pullup. In case he hasn’t outgrown it when you run out of diapers. 

It also helped to do a warm bath at night (he’d pee in the bath), and limit nighttime water to half his water bottle instead of a full one. 

[Clarita]

So for us I'm hoping the non-absorbency actually helps. I don't use the night-time stuff for my bedwetter, I'm hoping helps him to start sensing the need or the wetness to go to the bathroom in the middle of the night. There's a few nights where I have to change the sheets but for the most part it's fine. 

There's a book on nighttime potty training (specifically for those where it doesn't just happen naturally at the age of potty training). https://www.amazon.com/Waking-Dry-Children-Overcome-Bedwetting/dp/1581109067/ref=asc_df_1581109067/?tag=hyprod-20&linkCode=df0&hvadid=312177564685&hvpos=&hvnetw=g&hvrand=154116675931817684&hvpone=&hvptwo=&hvqmt=&hvdev=c&hvdvcmdl=&hvlocint=&hvlocphy=9032039&hvtargid=pla-492101194759&psc=1&tag=&ref=&adgrpid=60258870697&hvpone=&hvptwo=&hvadid=312177564685&hvpos=&hvnetw=g&hvrand=154116675931817684&hvqmt=&hvdev=c&hvdvcmdl=&hvlocint=&hvlocphy=9032039&hvtargid=pla-492101194759

I haven't tried the method. I don't think we are ready/need to do it just yet. The book showed what skills they need to make this happen and why it might be harder for some kids vs. others. 

13 minutes ago, Katy said:

When DS6 was in that phase (also a stomach sleeper), a cousin of mine with similar aged stomach-sleeping boys recommended adding disposable absorbent pads from Amazon into the front of the pullup. In case he hasn’t outgrown it when you run out of diapers. 

I have a reusable pad (incontinence pad) in case of leaks. They hold a lot they are made for adults as well as children. We place them under the sheets so it looks better and muffles the plasticy sound a bit. Other people put them over.  

[Katy]

Yeah, I have a nursing background and used Chux for other kids. I didn’t find it worked for that one. He moved too much. I’ve not read the book on night potty training, but unless what I learned in physiology class is now outdated… people make a hormone that slows kidney function at night and gets you to produce less urine during sleep. When kids start producing that hormone is generally genetic, though there are some medical conditions that delay it… trauma does too. And generally I’d rather deal with pull ups than make a kid be thirsty at bed time, or use moisture alarms because I’d find them traumatic (even if they did work for a bio sibling). Though I did offer them when the kid said he was worried about it. I think when he saw it wasn’t a big deal to me, he relaxed a lot and outgrew it about 6 months later. Now if he has an accident it’s generally vomiting in his sleep when coming down with something. 

[Hilltopmom]

My 8 year old uses overnight medical diapers because he wets so much overnight. Pull ups just don’t work for him. 
I’d have him try the free ones with an extra absorbent pad in them and see how it goes until they run out. Just explain that’s what you have for now so he’s wearing these for awhile.

 

[Ottakee]

Another trick for heavy wetters is to use 2 diapers or a diaper under a pull up….but cut a split in the lining of the inner one so the wetness can flow to the outside one.

Another option is to get flow through pads (like old fashioned maxi pads but designed for urine) and place on in the front of the diaper or pull up or even crossways across the top.  Some really heavy wetting boys we made a 2 with 2 of the pads.

Special education work plus foster care teaches you lots of tricks.

[Elizabeth86]

I’ve had 2 that wet the bed until around 8 or 9. They would have worn them no question. It was never anything they were ever embarrassed of. My oldest especially. He is a very practical kid and would have appreciated the money saved. 
 

eta they WOULD wear them no question about it. I accidentally typed wouldn’t. lol

Edited November 14, 2023 by Elizabeth86

[Clarita]

I'm a little bit loving this thread because I've been a little worried about DS and the bedwetting. (I asked the pediatrician about it which was how I found the book.) It's so reassuring to hear others having the same experiences. 

[Elizabeth86]

Just now, Clarita said:

I'm a little bit loving this thread because I've been a little worried about DS and the bedwetting. (I asked the pediatrician about it which was how I found the book.) It's so reassuring to hear others having the same experiences. 

I think it’s SO normal. It was for 2 of mine, dh and some of my family too 

[MsTake]

33 minutes ago, Elizabeth86 said:

I’ve had 2 that wet the bed until around 8 or 9. They would have worn them no question. It was never anything they were ever embarrassed of. My oldest especially. He is a very practical kid and would have appreciated the money saved. 
 

eta they WOULD wear them no question about it. I accidentally typed wouldn’t. lol

I may have jumped the gun a bit. I was nervous that he'd be hesitant to wear them, because they're so obviously *baby* diapers (they're literally Huggies) and he's very much in a 'big kid' phase at the moment.

BUT. We may have had a slight breakthrough.

I was just informed that 2 of the 3 boxes have Lion King on them. If that's true, I can almost 100% guarantee that DS will gladly wear them, without any hesitation. He's a lion king fanatic. Actually has lion king bedsheets on his bed at this very moment.

My biggest concern at the moment, is that I'm wondering - is their absorbency at least somewhat comparable to nighttime pull-ups? DS often wets more than once per night, and more often than not, he's on his stomach when it happens. So we're asking a lot of a diaper designed more for toddler-sized pees.

[MsTake]

44 minutes ago, Ottakee said:

Another trick for heavy wetters is to use 2 diapers or a diaper under a pull up….but cut a split in the lining of the inner one so the wetness can flow to the outside one.

Another option is to get flow through pads (like old fashioned maxi pads but designed for urine) and place on in the front of the diaper or pull up or even crossways across the top.  Some really heavy wetting boys we made a 2 with 2 of the pads.

Special education work plus foster care teaches you lots of tricks.

That's a great idea!!! He tends to sleep on his belly, so having that extra barrier would be a huge saving grace I'd think.

Does it matter if you have the pull-up or the diaper on the outside? We actually have plenty of pull-ups still remaining....just if he'd be fine with wearing these diapers, we'd essentially not need to buy anymore for a long long while. (which is nice! with the holidays coming up $$$).

[City Mouse]

Just a thought on the leaking. My DS was a late bedwetter. When his pull-ups would start leaking, that usually meant he needed to go up a size even when the his weight was within the current size.

[Ottakee]

12 minutes ago, MsTake said:

That's a great idea!!! He tends to sleep on his belly, so having that extra barrier would be a huge saving grace I'd think.

Does it matter if you have the pull-up or the diaper on the outside? We actually have plenty of pull-ups still remaining....just if he'd be fine with wearing these diapers, we'd essentially not need to buy anymore for a long long while. (which is nice! with the holidays coming up $$$).

I would put the pull up on the outside as it has more elastic and it is easy to cut the outer liner of a diaper.

If you have access to a medical supply store or even many thrift stores also sell those flow thru pads too.  And those are a big help.

[MsTake]

4 hours ago, Elizabeth86 said:

I’ve had 2 that wet the bed until around 8 or 9. They would have worn them no question. It was never anything they were ever embarrassed of. My oldest especially. He is a very practical kid and would have appreciated the money saved. 
 

eta they WOULD wear them no question about it. I accidentally typed wouldn’t. lol

My husband was floating the idea of framing it as "We can do X fun thing with the money we save from not buying you pull-ups!"

But...it looks like he might not need any convincing after all! Our oldest fell asleep early tonight, due to being zonked from lacrosse practice - which gave me some time to talk with DS in private about it.

I seem to not even know my own kid that well, as not only was he NOT bothered about wearing them - he was actually on the verge of waking up his brother to SHOW them to him (because they have Lion king on them 😑).

The good news is, between all he boxes we have (I need to check one box out in the garage, to make sure all three are the same size) we have approx. 200+ diapers to be used. Since he just wears one per night, that's more than enough to last many, many months. And they seem to fit him GREAT.

The only unknown now, is just...do they hold up? He has one on now, but I did not double it up like others have suggested (he was already in bed by the time I saw that mentioned). So tonight I suppose will be a big test. If it works, that is a big $$$ savings, right before the holidays. 😍

Edited November 14, 2023 by MsTake

[TinaS]

Can I just say, thank you for this thread? I've been stressing out like no other because my son is right about this age, and is showing no signs of being ready to stay dry at night. Was really starting to feel like I was alone in this, as none of our other parent friends have kids that are still wetting the bed still that I'm aware of.

Thank you all for the reassurance that we're not alone!