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My husband is clearly having hearing problems


Janeway
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And he gets angry when I try to tell him-when he hears me. Also, he keeps using loud things like this horrid carpet cleaner, with no ear plugs in. And me telling him that I think he is having a problem makes him angry. Also, he is having a sight problem but has bad habits. He actually only watches TV in the dark and he works on the computer for a living, but leaves the lights off when he works. He gets angry when I bring this stuff up. I feel like he will be deaf and blind by 50 and he doesn't even care. Anything I can do to get through to him? The other day when trying to buy tickets, he said he couldn't see the map of the theater.

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Sometimes adults have to find things out for themselves. they get upset if someone points out obvious things to them.

 

On a side note, my grandmother age 88 watches TV in the dark and always has. She only has glasses for reading. She claims it is better for the eyes to watch TV in the dark. It hasn't negatively affected here.

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I don't know if watching TV in the dark is actually a problem.  Unless you have good data on that, I'd drop that from the conversation.

 

If failing hearing is getting in his way, then he will seek help for it.  I would lay off the subject and wait for him to come up with the idea on his own.

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I would say this is common in adults nearing or in middle age. I guess it's hard to admit we're on the way to being older adults whose bodies just aren't as young as we would like to believe. Perhaps admitting that sight and hearing are impaired means he's getting old and he's not ready for that.

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I've learned over the years that you can't tell some men anything.  It has to be their own idea.  

My dh can't hear well either.  Our TV is usually blaring loud enough for the neighbors to hear  :glare:   He did, however, finally break down and get glasses.  

 

You'll laugh at his stubbornness though.  He kept putting off reading glasses.  Then he had to go on a business trip and realized that he couldn't see to read his book for the plane.  So, *in the airport* he bought a pair of reading glasses.  He sent me a pic.  They were ladies' glasses.  With rhinestones.  Apparently he was oblivious to what the glasses actually looked like.   :lol:  :lol:  :lol: He finally relented when he got home to go to the eye doctor.  (after we teased him mercilessly about the glasses he had to have stolen off of some grandma)

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My dad had hearing issues probably starting in his 50s due to working for 30+ years around heavy machinery never using ear plugs.  He never got hearing aids even though he clearly needed them.  I have no idea why he refused to wear hearing aids, but as a kid (he was an older dad), it affected our relationship because he couldn't hear me half the time and it just wasn't worth it to me to have to talk so loud that he could hear me.  Maybe come at it from a "do you want a relationship with other people?" angle.

Edited by bethben
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And he gets angry when I try to tell him-when he hears me. Also, he keeps using loud things like this horrid carpet cleaner, with no ear plugs in. And me telling him that I think he is having a problem makes him angry. Also, he is having a sight problem but has bad habits. He actually only watches TV in the dark and he works on the computer for a living, but leaves the lights off when he works. He gets angry when I bring this stuff up. I feel like he will be deaf and blind by 50 and he doesn't even care. Anything I can do to get through to him? The other day when trying to buy tickets, he said he couldn't see the map of the theater.

 

My husband was having some issues and we went to the ENT.  Turns out he just forms significant plugs of wax in the last few years.  The ENT pops them out and he is good again for another year.

 

His telltale sign was that he was also having tinnitus.  It was the pressure of the wax. 

 

So could it be something simpler?  I'd check that first. 

 

About the sight, the man needs better glasses or bifocals.  That can be pretty dangerous if he is out driving and needs to see something. 

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