Tell your boys to keep their "junk" in their pants

[EmseB]

The female anatomy equivalent of a penis is not a boob. You know that

 

I'd say a boob flash is similar to a mooning. Butts, boobs.... Everyone has 'em, some people have very attractive ones.

 

If a woman flashed her breasts to a 5 year old would that seems the same thing to you as an adult male showing his penis? How about a 13 year old?

 

Basically, one is R rated and the other is XXX.

I still don't understand what you're saying. Of course the female counterpart to a penis is not a boob biologically speaking, but then neither is a butt. We're talking about context of revealing body parts that are otherwise usually covered.

 

Sure, flashing a penis at a five year old is hugely inappropriate and scary. But that's not what happened here. And I would say, context depending, flashing a 5yo some b00ks is not okay either.

 

Obviously they are not equivalent parts, but for the sake of discussion, I would consider flashing either books or junk as a high school prank about the same thing. The funny thing is that a nip slip in the yearbook by a female would probably be a huge embarrassment and socially traumatizing. Here's a boy trying to get his deal in the yearbook.

[poppy]

I'm saying it's not a like a "nip slip" but instead is more out-of-bounds, but is (weirdly) being treated as not a problem.

f it is a high school yearbook it is for, what, 14-18 year olds.  I wouldn't really want my 14 year old looking at someone's genitalia.  I'd be annoyed. 

 

 

 

The funny thing is that a nip slip in the yearbook by a female would probably be a huge embarrassment and socially traumatizing. Here's a boy trying to get his deal in the yearbook.

 

That's not so much "funny" as really flipping sad.

[ktgrok]

Not sure how exposing a part of the body, one seen in artwork, statues, etc on a normal basis, is the same as punching car windows or burglarizing. There is no actual harm, and it wasn't done to scare, intimidate, etc. It was in a photo, not in person. Stupid, annoying, yes should be punished, but certainly not criminal. 

 

But I don't get the big deal about body parts. They aren't scary. 

 

Edited to Add: If a person is threatening you with their body, yes, that can be scary. A man flashing his penis at me in some situations could be frightening, in others, just pathetic. Same with hands though...someone threatening to hit me with their hand is scary, someone in another context exposing their hand is not. 

Edited May 9, 2016 by ktgrok

[Haiku]

Not sure how exposing a part of the body, one seen in artwork, statues, etc on a normal basis, is the same as punching car windows or burglarizing. There is no actual harm, and it wasn't done to scare, intimidate, etc. It was in a photo, not in person. Stupid, annoying, yes should be punished, but certainly not criminal. 

 

These boys starting off as "harmless pranksters" that no one corrected, or if they did correct them, it was reluctantly. 

 

Then things escalated. I thought I was fairly clear about that in my last paragraph.

Edited May 9, 2016 by TaraTheLiberator

[ktgrok]

These boys starting off as "harmless pranksters" that no one corrected, or if they did correct them, it was reluctantly. 

 

Then things escalated. I thought I was fairly clear about that in my last paragraph.

 

Ok, I guess to me those things didn't seem like harmless pranks, even initially. 

[Haiku]

Ok, I guess to me those things didn't seem like harmless pranks, even initially. 

 

They're not. I didn't list the harmless pranks. I mentioned the escalated incidents.

[ktgrok]

They're not. I didn't list the harmless pranks. I mentioned the escalated incidents.

 

OH! Ok, now I understand. Sorry, sick kid here and I misunderstood. I thought those incidents were the initial pranks that led to other stuff! I was like..um...those aren not pranks!

[Corraleno]

I'm not at all surprised that the issue went unnoticed for so long — this is a small photo (maybe 2" x 4"?) of about 70 players, lined up in rows, where their faces aren't even that distinct. I'm guessing that in the actual printed yearbook, their heads are maybe 1/4" high. If a tiny bit of his junk was poking out of the top of his waistband, it would be pretty hard to see without a magnifying glass — it can't have been much more than a tiny, indistinct blob. It was a truly stupid thing for him to have done, but not exactly traumatizing for anyone who owns the yearbook.

Edited May 9, 2016 by Corraleno

[Bluegoat]

A boob is not comparable to a penis. It just isn't.

 

In terms of it being inappropriate to show it in the yearbook?  I think it is pretty similar.

 

No one here said the boy should be charged, either. But there is a whole lot more angst or at least thoughtful debate about girls and their responsibilities regarding how they present their bodies . Not so with boys. Boys have junk. Boys pull pranks. Acting like seeing a boys junk might be upsetting is absurd (the 'fainting' remark). It is a double standard. Which- hey- that's the way of the world. Let's just be aware of our own part in perpetuating it.

 

Yes, because for boys their bodies have not generally been sexualized by society to the same degree.  So that level of pressure is typically not there for them, and that is not generally why they are doing it. 

 

I don't think it is really very common to flash themselves as a joke, though it does happen occasionally.  More often it seems to be like Mardi Gras or Girls Gone Wild type of situations.  With boys it is almost the opposite.

 

It makes no sense to claim the two should be seen as equivalent when they are not.  Different histories, different present day context, makes for different meaning.

 

Boys do have pressure to present themselves as sexual in other ways that can be unhealthy, and that kind of stuff can sometimes be quite inappropriate, but it doesn't necessarily look identical to what girls experience.

[Murphy101]

I'm not at all surprised that the issue went unnoticed for so long — this is small photo (maybe 2" x 4"?) of about 70 players, lined up in rows, where their faces aren't even that distinct. I'm guessing that in the actual printed yearbook, their heads are maybe 1/4" high. If a tiny bit of his junk was poking out of the top of his waistband, it would be pretty hard to see without a magnifying glass — it can't have been much more than a tiny, indistinct blob. It was a truly stupid thing for him to have done, but not exactly traumatizing for anyone who owns the yearbook.

Well that'll add prestige. Bc every guy wants his penis referred to as a tiny bit of junk, a tiny indistinct blob. So he's got that going for him at least. I bet that'll make the photo haunting him for a few years easier. Karma is sometimes swift.

 

I didn't look at the pic bc I don't have an inclination to do so. Here, the football photos are a full page and often some of the largest group photos in the entire yearbook. So that's what I was basing my opinion of the photo editor on. My error.

 

Doesn't change my view of the kid though.

Edited May 9, 2016 by Murphy101

[Bluegoat]

What if he had taken a picture of himself in a similar pose and texted it, or distributed it by hand, to everyone who ordered a yearbook? What if he walked up to a group of girls at school and exposed himself the same way he did in the picture? Should the consequences be different in these situations?

 

I don't have any answers in mind, just thinking out loud here....

 

I would say in the case of exposing himself directly, and to some extent the picture,it's a possibility he's acting as a flasher.  Though he might just be trying to shock.  If he has a compulsion, that is a problem that requires treatment as it isn't likely to get better.  The other real difficulty is that it could well be perceived as directly threatening to the people involved - especially the ones in person.  They don't really know his intent.  Even if he did not intend that, it's something he needs to understand, quickly.

 

To my mind the major reason the group picture is seen as funny is because the context - a group photo - is absurd.  Even more absurd is that no one noticed.  And it is not like anyone browsing the yearbook is going to think he is intending some kind of assault on them.

[poppy]

 

 

In terms of it being inappropriate to show it in the yearbook?  I think it is pretty similar.

 

If a penis = a female nipple, then what would be the equivalent to a girl flashing her genitalia?  

[EmseB]

If a penis = a female nipple, then what would be the equivalent to a girl flashing her genitalia?

I honestly think that all three of those things, in terms of trying to sneak nudity into the yearbook, are all about the same in terms of what should be done about it. I don't think any of them are more or less innocuous than the other.

[abcmommy]

I would be very disturbed if I heard of these goings on- and Im the mom of 2 teen boys, one of whom is a high school athlete.

 

This sort of environment is dangerous.

 

http://www.theindychannel.com/news/graphic-details-revealed-in-carmel-assault-report

[Murphy101]

I would be very disturbed if I heard of these goings on- and Im the mom of 2 teen boys, one of whom is a high school athlete.

 

This sort of environment is dangerous.

 

http://www.theindychannel.com/news/graphic-details-revealed-in-carmel-assault-report

You and me both. 7 sons here and by 17ish, the worst that they'd consider normal guy stuff might be towel snapping.

 

It always seems likes it's 2-5/6 guys making everyone else accept this crap as okay and everyone else is just trying to stay the heck out of their path of destruction while the adults are being complacent do nothing donkey butts.

[MrsMommy]

I'm not at all surprised that the issue went unnoticed for so long — this is a small photo (maybe 2" x 4"?) of about 70 players, lined up in rows, where their faces aren't even that distinct. I'm guessing that in the actual printed yearbook, their heads are maybe 1/4" high. If a tiny bit of his junk was poking out of the top of his waistband, it would be pretty hard to see without a magnifying glass — it can't have been much more than a tiny, indistinct blob. It was a truly stupid thing for him to have done, but not exactly traumatizing for anyone who owns the yearbook.

 

This. I mean, it's been almost 20 years since I was in high school, but back then, those picture were not that clear. I can't believe anyone could even tell, to be honest. Sure, it's stupid. And juvenile. But is worth getting upset about? Not to me. And I would feel that way if it was a female athlete doing something similar.

[Caroline]

Wasn't this a Rosanne episode?

 

But seriously, did the school figure it out because someone tattled? And was this the football team picture that went out to all the booster club contributors and is hanging in fast food restaurants and IHOPs all over the area? Our football team's picture is all over our community, and if this happened, I suspect that contributions to our football team (which didn't win a game this year) might diminish.

 

About calling the police...Many high schools have a police officer on campus at all times. He has the same radio as all the admin and would know about the incident immediately. It is his call as to if criminal charges are brought. It isn't the school's call. Not that I think that is right. I don't like that the school is not allowed to handle things.

[Guest]

Im (not) sorry the more this gets hashed out here, the funnier it gets to me. Like this is the big reaction to his prank.noysofunnynow, eh bub? And lol im trying to think how a girl could sneak the tip of her vulva in a picture without ppl noticing for months hahaha That would be prit-tee stealthy.

[Bluegoat]

If a penis = a female nipple, then what would be the equivalent to a girl flashing her genitalia?  

 

Probably about the same, though I can only think of one time I ever saw a girl flash her woo-hoo, and she was pretty far gone with drugs and booze.  maybe because it isn't really all that showy or even accessible depending on the clothes. 

 

All three are parts you aren't normally meant to show in public.

[Bluegoat]

Im (not) sorry the more this gets hashed out here, the funnier it gets to me. Like this is the big reaction to his prank.noysofunnynow, eh bub? And lol im trying to think how a girl could sneak the tip of her vulva in a picture without ppl noticing for months hahaha That would be prit-tee stealthy.

 

Maybe she could pull a sort of Sharon Stone, if she was sitting in the front row?

 

My sense is most teen girls would think that was gross, or undignified, though.

 

My daughter came home from a youth group for girls at the community center the other night and said "I know why kids my age (11) shouldn't date.  It's because teen boys are really immature."

 

I'm not sure what convinced her of this, but it's kind of true - their social sense often seems a little less developed than teen girls.

[kitten18]

Wasn't this a Rosanne episode?

 

I think that was D.J. flipping the bird in a class picture.

[Guest]

Maybe she could pull a sort of Sharon Stone, if she was sitting in the front row?

 

My sense is most teen girls would think that was gross, or undignified, though.

 

My daughter came home from a youth group for girls at the community center the other night and said "I know why kids my age (11) shouldn't date.  It's because teen boys are really immature."

 

I'm not sure what convinced her of this, but it's kind of true - their social sense often seems a little less developed than teen girls.

 

I have a story that makes me laugh literally out loud every time I remember, and it has nothing to do with this thread. So. Here I go.

 

We were at an outside restaurant place a few weeks ago and my boys were covering themselves in rocks...the whole ground was tiny pebbles. A few kids started coming over because of course *those* kids are rolling around in the rocks...

 

A little girl about four was playing with them and she stood up and said, "I got a rock in my noni," pulled up her little sundress and fished it right out. She was like "got it!" and went right back to playing. I was the only adult that saw it as far as I could tell. I was DYING laughing hahahaha Her business was right out. My kids did not even register. I did make sure they didn't touch her hands hahahaha

[Guest]

Don't women's brains complete maturation before men's? [still in the 20s though, right?]

 

[Bluegoat]

Don't women's brains complete maturation before men's? [still in the 20s though, right?]

 

I would not be surprised.  Their bodies start and finish earlier, and their behavior seems to mirror that to a large extent.  I think a lot of girls brains are done at about 20, they just lack experience at that point.  Many boys seem to be pretty immature up until about 25.

[Guest]

I would not be surprised.  Their bodies start and finish earlier, and their behavior seems to mirror that to a large extent.  I think a lot of girls brains are done at about 20, they just lack experience at that point.  Many boys seem to be pretty immature up until about 25.

 

Yep here we go.

 

18 year olds are about halfway through the process that begins with the onset of puberty. And women finish sooner.

[Professormom]

Now I finally get it! I was wondering what would be so funny about "Spine".

:lol: