JoJosMom Posted December 10, 2015 Share Posted December 10, 2015 From Reader's Digest: A man called, furious about an Orlando, Florida, vacation package we had booked for him: He was 
expecting an ocean-view hotel 
room. I explained that was not possible, since Orlando is in the middle of 
the state. “Don’t lie to me,†he said. 
“I looked on the map, and Florida is a very thin state.†Source: hotelstories.freeservers.com 8 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JoJosMom Posted December 10, 2015 Share Posted December 10, 2015 Same source: My ESL students try so hard and are so appreciative. One student paid me the ultimate compliment when she said, “You teach English good.†Another assured me, “I will always forget you.†And a third insisted, “I thank you from the heart of my bottom.†Ellen Israel, Alamo, California 7 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JoJosMom Posted December 10, 2015 Share Posted December 10, 2015 ITT friends: I love you from the heart of my bottom. 8 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JoJosMom Posted December 10, 2015 Share Posted December 10, 2015 Hmm. Looks like ikslo's auditor friend is more entertaining than I am. How tragic. I shall slink off to do something productive. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
prairiewindmomma Posted December 10, 2015 Share Posted December 10, 2015 JoJo--no, don't go! 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
prairiewindmomma Posted December 10, 2015 Share Posted December 10, 2015 Productivity is highly overrated. 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ikslo Posted December 10, 2015 Share Posted December 10, 2015 (edited) Nope. Auditor was just drilling me with questions. Our system is not adequate. Tell me something I don't know, lady. :lol: :lol: :lol: ETA: She's an auditor. She should know that upper management won't fix/improve anything unless the auditor writes it up as a problem. Write it up. We'll fix it enough to satisfy you, and we move on. No skin off my back. ETA2: Small font is not something I care about. You wanted it printed. The spreadsheet was not designed to be printed, it was designed to store and retrieve information. Go home. You're bothering me. Edited December 10, 2015 by ikslo 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
prairiewindmomma Posted December 10, 2015 Share Posted December 10, 2015 My 9 yo is hiding from me (and school). Time to start the search party. Later, y'all! 5 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Another Lynn Posted December 10, 2015 Share Posted December 10, 2015 I used to be an auditor in my pre-motherhood life. But I was never that prissy. 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
texasmama Posted December 10, 2015 Share Posted December 10, 2015 I have angered the middle child gods. Woe unto me. Game on. 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lots of little ducklings Posted December 10, 2015 Share Posted December 10, 2015 I went to the dentist too. I'm considering telling everyone that we're naming it Mertle or something. My parents did this, so we did too. Silly pre-birth names, that is. Worked beautifully, and while everyone knew our babies' genders in advance, the name was a surprise. MIL was the only one to ever slam a name after the baby was already born and official. Her filter had been lost for years and its absence mostly provided us with an endless source of entertainment at her expense, so we forgave her. She also slammed the number of children; now that I think about it, that was a bit of a sting and took longer to forgive. But she'd had four, and had had a hard life, and actually really liked me, so..... I think she meant to protect me. :laugh: 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lots of little ducklings Posted December 10, 2015 Share Posted December 10, 2015 Heck when I learned that the other family from 4H named their baby girl Cleopatra I didn't say a negative word to the mom about it. *whispers* though when the teen brother told me I may have asked if mom was high on drugs when she named the baby that. BUT when I realized that was really her name and they were not pulling my leg I simply stuck with congrats. Brandy. Quoting you just to say that ds8 is very happy you are back with us. He says your cat is the coolest thing on the ITT. 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lots of little ducklings Posted December 10, 2015 Share Posted December 10, 2015 I support rake and runs. Significantly different than trying to spread god's love by ringing my doorbell, giving me a book I have three of, and running off. Somebody, please. Rake and run my yard. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lots of little ducklings Posted December 10, 2015 Share Posted December 10, 2015 Double post so please allow me this opportunity to advise everyone not to swim in the sea or take unnecessary journeys!!!! I am outta likes again. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
texasmama Posted December 10, 2015 Share Posted December 10, 2015 Somebody, please. Rake and run my yard. I know, right??? :lol: I need someone to weed and run. My flower beds are an overgrown mess. They are an embarrassment. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
texasmama Posted December 10, 2015 Share Posted December 10, 2015 (edited) I texted oldest this morning to warn her not to take any unnecessary journeys or risks on treacherous roads. She asked if I was drunk. She has not seen Teresa. Edited May 21, 2016 by texasmama 6 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jean in Newcastle Posted December 10, 2015 Share Posted December 10, 2015 ITT friends: I love you from the heart of my bottom. And our bottoms love you back. 7 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lots of little ducklings Posted December 10, 2015 Share Posted December 10, 2015 I know right???? :lol: HORsey-DOO-vers. KRAUT-uns. Chicka-Fil. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jean in Newcastle Posted December 10, 2015 Share Posted December 10, 2015 Somebody, please. Rake and run my yard. I know, right??? :lol: I need someone to weed and run. My flower beds are an overgrown mess. They are an embarrassment. I need a weed and run, and a landscape and run, and a clean the house and run, and a declutter and run. 7 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jean in Newcastle Posted December 10, 2015 Share Posted December 10, 2015 SKissors 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lots of little ducklings Posted December 10, 2015 Share Posted December 10, 2015 The other auditor and the Cal Lab supervisor just joined us. Now she is talking about rental properties/being a landlord with the Cal Lab supervisor. Lord have mercy! I am going to crack. ETA: Booyah bells, Booyah bells, Booyah all the way! Oh what fun it is to Booyah, or booya Slashe's way! Likety. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
texasmama Posted December 10, 2015 Share Posted December 10, 2015 HORsey-DOO-vers. KRAUT-uns. Chicka-Fil. We say chicken-uh-lay here. :D 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lots of little ducklings Posted December 10, 2015 Share Posted December 10, 2015 I need a weed and run, and a landscape and run, and a clean the house and run, and a declutter and run. I just got a text from the library that my Kon-Mari book is finally waiting for me. Didn't I throw that on my queue sometime last August? Is there only one copy in all of New England? Ennnnnyhoooooo.... I will text dh to pick it up for me on his way home. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Slache Posted December 10, 2015 Share Posted December 10, 2015 My parents did this, so we did too. Silly pre-birth names, that is. Worked beautifully, and while everyone knew our babies' genders in advance, the name was a surprise. MIL was the only one to ever slam a name after the baby was already born and official. Her filter had been lost for years and its absence mostly provided us with an endless source of entertainment at her expense, so we forgave her. She also slammed the number of children; now that I think about it, that was a bit of a sting and took longer to forgive. But she'd had four, and had had a hard life, and actually really liked me, so..... I think she meant to protect me. :laugh: I'm trying to think of a great backstory here so that nobody can bash it. I'm thinking that Myrtle is my great aunt. She has to be my aunt and not my grandmother because everybody has an aunt Myrtle not a mother Myrtle because nobody will marry someone named Myrtle. She was a great hero in the civil rights movement. We will do a home school unit study on her when the kids are old enough. She died young and childless standing up for women's and/or black rights. It was quite tragic. 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
texasmama Posted December 10, 2015 Share Posted December 10, 2015 The septic man has emptied the tank. I quick put on the dishwasher and the washing machine and emptied the tub of last night's bath water. It's good to be me. :hurray: 6 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jean in Newcastle Posted December 10, 2015 Share Posted December 10, 2015 I just got a text from the library that my Kon-Mari book is finally waiting for me. Didn't I throw that on my queue sometime last August? Is there only one copy in all of New England? Ennnnnyhoooooo.... I will text dh to pick it up for me on his way home. I have an irrational dislike of Kon-Mari 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Slache Posted December 10, 2015 Share Posted December 10, 2015 I just got a text from the library that my Kon-Mari book is finally waiting for me. Didn't I throw that on my queue sometime last August? Is there only one copy in all of New England? Ennnnnyhoooooo.... I will text dh to pick it up for me on his way home. I was 400 on a waiting list. Our library has 50 copies though. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Slache Posted December 10, 2015 Share Posted December 10, 2015 I have an irrational dislike of Kon-Mari You're missing out. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lots of little ducklings Posted December 10, 2015 Share Posted December 10, 2015 I'm trying to think of a great backstory here so that nobody can bash it. I'm thinking that Myrtle is my great aunt. She has to be my aunt and not my grandmother because everybody has an aunt Myrtle not a mother Myrtle because nobody will marry someone named Myrtle. She was a great hero in the civil rights movement. We will do a home school unit study on her when the kids are old enough. She died young and childless standing up for women's and/or black rights. It was quite tragic. Even so. Myrtle. (Not to slam Myrtle too much as a name. It will become popular again, and everyone in Manhattan will be naming their child Myrtle, and it'll be all the rage.) 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tsuga Posted December 10, 2015 Share Posted December 10, 2015 I have an irrational dislike of Kon-Mari ME TOO. 1. Things don't give me joy, people do. 2. I'm working class, beyatch. My stuff isn't even matching, much less beautiful. I got it on clearance at Target or IKEA or as a hand me down. My decorating style is 95% quiet desperation and I'm not going to be unhappy about that. 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lots of little ducklings Posted December 10, 2015 Share Posted December 10, 2015 Jean, your dislike may be in fact quite rational. I will let you know after I read the book. Tex, so glad the Poopy Truck finally came! (that's what we call it here; its arrival is a momentous event.) I saw the dentist about my new tooth pain. It may simply be caused by a bite problem, not a root problem. She promised me that she prays over every tooth she works on ( :001_wub:) and shaved it down a bit. Then she gave me painkillers and antibiotics and a referral to an endo in the event that the pain continues. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Slache Posted December 10, 2015 Share Posted December 10, 2015 Even so. Myrtle. (Not to slam Myrtle too much as a name. It will become popular again, and everyone in Manhattan will be naming their child Myrtle, and it'll be all the rage.) I don't think I have an aversion to any name in particular, but MIL hates that name with a passion. I do like sweet names for girls and that doesn't sound sweet to me. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
texasmama Posted December 10, 2015 Share Posted December 10, 2015 My decorating style is 95% quiet desperation and I'm not going to be unhappy about that.Lol. Quiet desperation. My decorating style is Hobby Lobby 70% clearance 5 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JoJosMom Posted December 10, 2015 Share Posted December 10, 2015 Somebody, please. Rake and run my yard. I would ask, but I strongly suspect that "Shovel Poop and Run!" will never, ever be a thing. 7 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tsuga Posted December 10, 2015 Share Posted December 10, 2015 I think the baby's nickname should be Turtle regardless. 6 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JoJosMom Posted December 10, 2015 Share Posted December 10, 2015 I have an irrational dislike of Kon-Mari I have no idea what that is. Or Bon Qui Qui. :o 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JoJosMom Posted December 10, 2015 Share Posted December 10, 2015 I'm trying to think of a great backstory here so that nobody can bash it. I'm thinking that Myrtle is my great aunt. She has to be my aunt and not my grandmother because everybody has an aunt Myrtle not a mother Myrtle because nobody will marry someone named Myrtle. She was a great hero in the civil rights movement. We will do a home school unit study on her when the kids are old enough. She died young and childless standing up for women's and/or black rights. It was quite tragic. I think that's great! Molly can have the nickname Myrtle. Myrtle the . 7 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JoJosMom Posted December 10, 2015 Share Posted December 10, 2015 Jean, your dislike may be in fact quite rational. I will let you know after I read the book. Tex, so glad the Poopy Truck finally came! (that's what we call it here; its arrival is a momentous event.) I saw the dentist about my new tooth pain. It may simply be caused by a bite problem, not a root problem. She promised me that she prays over every tooth she works on ( :001_wub:) and shaved it down a bit. Then she gave me painkillers and antibiotics and a referral to an endo in the event that the pain continues. Holy cow. A dentist that I might actually be able to stand. Without throwing up in the waiting room. Sadly, I'm thinking 1000+ miles away might be a tad far. 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JoJosMom Posted December 10, 2015 Share Posted December 10, 2015 I think the baby's nickname should be Turtle regardless. We posted concurrently! Great minds and all that! 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lots of little ducklings Posted December 10, 2015 Share Posted December 10, 2015 Good Thursday Morning! Look how far we've made it this week! Anyone starting Christmas break next week? I'm thinking of only doing math and free reading. Or not. (And I'm still outta likes.) We are starting break today. :D Except that for us break means no outside activities involving "homework" (CC, Bible school, etc...); but we still do math and reading each morning. Because we aren't running out the door for events, it's actually quite relaxing. When everyone gets bored, we do catch-up work and CC review. I plan to bake cookies (for us!), finish yardwork before snow arrives, and start freezing extra meals in my brand-new (old hand-me-down) full-sized upright freezer. I'd also like to update my cookbook project, but that may be wishful thinking. :001_rolleyes: 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Critterfixer Posted December 10, 2015 Share Posted December 10, 2015 I've got one more week of school before we start break. It will probably be a light week. 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lots of little ducklings Posted December 10, 2015 Share Posted December 10, 2015 (edited) Holy cow. A dentist that I might actually be able to stand. Without throwing up in the waiting room. Sadly, I'm thinking 1000+ miles away might be a tad far. She's new to our practice but I really really like her. No pain getting the crown last week (just this new pain developing ever since); and she gave me $60 worth of whitening strips for free, and is from the Bible Belt (which means she "talks like Daddy!"), and is very young and energetic and up on the latest technology (dental and otherwise), and is chatty with me and the hygienist but not in an annoying way, so dental visits are fun without any awkward silences or grunts. And that says a lot. Because I am not a fan of grunting as I drool all over my own bib, and if I MUST grunt and drool all over my own bib, I am particular about the people before whom it is done. ETA: She also came into the waiting room and high-fived my "awesome posse" of kids then bemoaned the fact that they already go to a pediatric dentist at another practice. If you think that my posse is awesome after they've missed breakfast and been sitting in a waiting room unsupervised for 30 minutes, you are my friend for life. Edited December 10, 2015 by Lotsoflittleducklings 7 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lots of little ducklings Posted December 10, 2015 Share Posted December 10, 2015 My likes are back. :huh: 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
texasmama Posted December 10, 2015 Share Posted December 10, 2015 I would ask, but I strongly suspect that "Shovel Poop and Run!" will never, ever be a thing. Nope. Not a thing. I think the baby's nickname should be Turtle regardless. I concur, plus it is gender-neutral. I have no idea what that is. Or Bon Qui Qui. :o #thingsthatcannotbeunseen 7 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
prairiewindmomma Posted December 10, 2015 Share Posted December 10, 2015 Littlest puked in the van. There went my day.😷 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ikslo Posted December 10, 2015 Share Posted December 10, 2015 (Not to slam Myrtle too much as a name. It will become popular again, and everyone in Manhattan will be naming their child Myrtle, and it'll be all the rage.) And Lloyd will be just as popular. Myrtle and Lloyd. Has a nice ring to it. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
texasmama Posted December 10, 2015 Share Posted December 10, 2015 (edited) Littlest puked in the van. There went my day.😷 Oh dear. :grouphug: And Lloyd will be just as popular. Myrtle and Lloyd. Has a nice ring to it. Not one you hear in the younger set these days. I have a great uncle named Lloyd. He is in his 90's. Edited May 21, 2016 by texasmama Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
texasmama Posted December 10, 2015 Share Posted December 10, 2015 (edited) I don't love my name. I always wanted to be Julie. <sob> ETA: I have sobbed my way to a booya(h) so Deck the Halls with Booya(h), Booya(h) Falalalalalalalala. #hadtocountthelas Also, Don't make unnecessary booya(h)s! Don't take risks on treacherous booya(h)s! And don't swim in the booya(h)! Edited May 21, 2016 by texasmama 9 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
texasmama Posted December 10, 2015 Share Posted December 10, 2015 My middle name is no good, either. It sounds country. All in all, I think they could have done better. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ikslo Posted December 10, 2015 Share Posted December 10, 2015 Littlest puked in the van. There went my day.😷 :grouphug: For your littlest. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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