MotherGoose Posted March 13, 2015 Share Posted March 13, 2015 ...one day my house will be clean and there will be no little feet around to make a mess. One day there will be no toys strewn in a trail. One day my children will clean up behind themselves and will have their own houses in which to make messes. In the interim, enjoy these days because you will miss it. I visited my sister last week, in her beautiful home (she's neither married nor has kids) that is always spotless. The hardwood floors aren't scratched, she has a WHITE!! couch (I don't want a white couch, but even if I did I couldn't have one), and everything is always put away. There are no trails of anything. If she begins a task, she can complete it without interruption. It was lovely to awaken when I wanted, to eat what I wanted, to clean up behind myself and for it to stay that way, to not have to make anyone clean up or eat their veggies. We went shopping, we went to the theater, it was LOVELY. It doesn't help that I'm about 6 weeks pregnant and in the hormonal stage and also in some sort of crazy cleaning phase that I get into at this stage of pregnancy either. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Amira Posted March 13, 2015 Share Posted March 13, 2015 I hope to look back fondly on the good parts of raising children but I have no intention of wishing I could clean up after someone when my children are gone. Sometimes it's hard to see the good parts, but I've never really understood why people whose children are out of the house try to make me feel guilty for not loving the chaos. It's fine with me if they wish they were doing laundry and cleaning all day, but I plan to enjoy not doing it. Remind me to focus on the good parts instead of telling me to love the not-so-fun parts. (I'm not trying to say in any way that your post is trying to do this, just that it seems to be a common sentiment for some people.) I'm glad you had a lovely visit with your sister. It's so nice to have a break and remember that there is more out there even if you're satisfied with your choices. 6 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
creekland Posted March 13, 2015 Share Posted March 13, 2015 :grouphug: I don't want the spotless house. I want my kids and the great memories that go with them. How about planning something that will be positively memorable for you? A quick trip? A game day? A movie marathon? A hike? Ruts can get old. They can drive anyone batty. And FWIW, I do really miss my kids when they are gone. I'm getting wistful now that in less than 2 days middle son will be on an airplane flying back to his wonderful life at college. I'm happy for him (and oldest/youngest), but I definitely miss them. (I don't miss the extra cleaning, laundry, or food bill, and the freedom to do what I want when I want is nice, but... I'd love to re-live 2006 again. My boys were 10, 12, and 14 then. It was a great year.) 9 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fairfarmhand Posted March 13, 2015 Share Posted March 13, 2015 I blame it on the weather. My kids have been mostly indoors for months. There's no break from the messes. I get it. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
momacacia Posted March 13, 2015 Share Posted March 13, 2015 I have a WHITE couch with a slipcover that washes up beautifully (the once a year I wash it). And a white rug on that same room which is our school/music room. And honestly, I think DH and I have dinged our wood floors more than our kids have. But, when we remodeled this house I decided I wasn't going to wait the rest of my life to have things the way I wanted just because we have kids. Walls need repainting, baseboards touched up and the rug probably needs to see the Rug Doctor again, but that would be the case anyway after not having painted for 10 years. I vote for more vacations at your sisters house. :) Someday they will be gone and quite frankly with kids my age, I look forward to that. "Go do something with your life for heaven's sake and leave me alone!" Lol. :) But I also stay home from church sometimes while toddler naps and have my own mini vacation enjoying my own home in peace and quiet. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MotherGoose Posted March 13, 2015 Author Share Posted March 13, 2015 Yes, my house wasn't spotless before I had kids, but at least it was MY mess, YKWIM? And I have a nice house, but wow it would be nice to not have disasters all the time :) Doesn't help that oldest DD has the same tendencies I fight against in myself to leave a trail of a mess of unfinished projects around. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tsuga Posted March 13, 2015 Share Posted March 13, 2015 I am repeating after you. :) I like uninterrupted tasks. We actually HAVE a white couch (purchased by his ex-girlfriend while in denial and he, being a compliant person, just acquiesced) and it's awful. :P Yes we wash it but come on, there's swim lessons and cheer team and piano lessons and violin and play dates and sleepovers and a proper dinner with home-cooked meat to be made and game night and karaoke night to be had and then the hike and the run and signing up for summer camps and and and... Oh how I hear you. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MomtoCandJ Posted March 13, 2015 Share Posted March 13, 2015 I will pee in peace again, I will pee in peace again.... Sorry, I'm tired of having dd2 scream at me if I shut the bathroom door to go, if it not shut, she sits on the stool and "talks" to me. 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted March 13, 2015 Share Posted March 13, 2015 I love clean, orderly houses. I really do. So yeah, I get it. I adore my children and this is a stage we are in, but I do miss the days of having a cool knickknack on a coffee table and knowing it could stay there, without being broken. Or, hey, even stopping in the middle of a spinning project, leaving my wheel in the living room, and knowing it won't be spun and the leader lost or the bobbin untwisted the moment I walk away. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Peaceful Isle Posted March 13, 2015 Share Posted March 13, 2015 I refuse to buy any new furniture till my kids are grown up, or worry about the permanent marker on my table, or the chocolate stain on my rug... ;) That being said...they do grow up so quickly. I will miss them when they are gone and the house is quiet. :( Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Night Elf Posted March 13, 2015 Share Posted March 13, 2015 I remember those days of feeling behind all the time. Not being able to turn in a complete circle without seeing toys and leftover dishes laying around. And now my kids are grown and my house is pretty much kid free. And yet I truly miss those days. When they are gone, they are truly gone. It will happen eventually. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
plansrme Posted March 13, 2015 Share Posted March 13, 2015 My oldest was a horrible infant--really awful (there is a reason we adopted #2, seriously), and when she was crying her little head off in public, sweet little old ladies would smile at me encouragingly and tell me to treasure these days, that I would miss them. And you know what? They were WRONG! I do not miss crying babies one tiny bit! But I get what you mean. I will miss their company when they are out of the house. I like my kids (of course I love them; that is a given), but I will not miss the mess. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ILiveInFlipFlops Posted March 13, 2015 Share Posted March 13, 2015 I honestly do not think I believe you. Do you promise?! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LMD Posted March 14, 2015 Share Posted March 14, 2015 Yes, my house wasn't spotless before I had kids, but at least it was MY mess, YKWIM? And I have a nice house, but wow it would be nice to not have disasters all the time :) Doesn't help that oldest DD has the same tendencies I fight against in myself to leave a trail of a mess of unfinished projects around. Exactly this! Are you me? 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Minerva Posted March 14, 2015 Share Posted March 14, 2015 I love an orderly house, and I don't like to clean. I do, however, love the lopsided cardboard house in the middle of the living room. The stick dolls my dd is making on the dining room table. The bright, crazy artwork all over the walls. The beaded bracelets that we are all wearing after last weeks beading frenzy--though not the little beads that still stick to the bottom of my feet! The lego diorama and ever morphing story that goes along with it--but not those dang legos that I keep stepping on! There are times when I go berserk and can't understand how I live like this, but there are more times when I look around at the evidence of education and creativity and I feel HAPPY. Enjoy your sisters house, your pregnancy and the occasional moments of controlled chaos. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jenny in Florida Posted March 14, 2015 Share Posted March 14, 2015 :grouphug: I don't want the spotless house. I want my kids and the great memories that go with them. How about planning something that will be positively memorable for you? A quick trip? A game day? A movie marathon? A hike? Ruts can get old. They can drive anyone batty. And FWIW, I do really miss my kids when they are gone. I'm getting wistful now that in less than 2 days middle son will be on an airplane flying back to his wonderful life at college. I'm happy for him (and oldest/youngest), but I definitely miss them. (I don't miss the extra cleaning, laundry, or food bill, and the freedom to do what I want when I want is nice, but... I'd love to re-live 2006 again. My boys were 10, 12, and 14 then. It was a great year.) Totally with you on this. My daughter is living on her own, and my son is on campus, and I miss them like crazy. I am not a person who likes cleaning, and I don't care if my house is spotless or beautifully decorated. I would much rather have my kids around and be together in the mess. It's my son's spring break, and he opted to go back to campus a few days early because that's where his friends are. I did his laundry and helped him shop for groceries for his dorm room and packed up the car and drove him back, enjoying chatting with him on the drive. I tried not to make him feel guilty about it, but I will admit to crying a bit on the way home. I'm thrilled that both of mine are doing so well. I'm proud of them, and I like the adults they are becoming. But, yeah, there are definitely a couple of years I'd love to live all over again, because I also miss the younger versions of them and the time we spent together. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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