Ginevra Posted September 13, 2014 Share Posted September 13, 2014 Or that I should double up on my anxiety medication? ;) Dd is on Varsity soccer at her (private) school. There are about 16-17 young ladies in varsity. Every year, a family has hosted a giant sleepover for all the soccer ladies. The girls adore it; of course it is a ball of good times. The family who has done it previously graduated their soccer player and, thus, is no longer primarily involved. Dd floated the idea of hosting it at our house. I can't say the idea excites me, but I'm not categorically against it, either. We have a lot of space here, so it is logical that our house works for it. My only reservation is that I really like my peace and quiet; I'm not a more-the-merrier extrovert. The family who hosted previously was more extroverted. Am I over-thinking it? These are generally pretty nice young ladies; i have no fears that anyone will do anything outrageous. It is mostly the thought of the commotion and noise that makes me quail. P.s. My teenaged son is 100% in favor of having the girls over! ;) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MrsMommy Posted September 13, 2014 Share Posted September 13, 2014 Do you have good ear plugs? ;) I can't even imagine. But 1.) We don't have that much space, especially since there are already seven of us living here and our basement isn't finished; and B.) The commotion of sleepovers was overwhelming to me when I was the one attending, so I have no idea how it would feel to me now! It's sounds like you're a fun mom, though, and I'm sure your daughter and her friends would love it! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PrincessMommy Posted September 13, 2014 Share Posted September 13, 2014 I'm not a more-the-merrier extrovert either, but as long as I personally didn't have to be the entertainment committee - then I'd do it. I like my peace and quiet and sleep is very precious to me since I deal with insomnia, et al... but I think for one night I'd go along. Good luck. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bettyandbob Posted September 13, 2014 Share Posted September 13, 2014 You are over thinking. You have to decide what you can handle, but for me, this would be a grit my teeth and get through it with a smile pasted on my face situation. I'd make sure the calendar was blocked from any scheduling after the party was over so I could recover and treat myself to something. If you go through with it, your dd will have a special memory from senior year that you made happen. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Coffeemama Posted September 13, 2014 Share Posted September 13, 2014 It's one night. The memories for your DD and the others will be great. You can do it! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
marbel Posted September 13, 2014 Share Posted September 13, 2014 I am an introvert but if I had the space I'd do it in a minutes. As someone else said, it's one night! (My son would stay far, far away though. :lol: ) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AmyontheFarm Posted September 13, 2014 Share Posted September 13, 2014 Invite the girls over, make sure Dad and an Aunt is there to watch over things and take your son out to the movies to remove him from the girl zone. :) Also, make sure dd understands that the cleaning the house for this sleepover is HER job not yours. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Word Nerd Posted September 13, 2014 Share Posted September 13, 2014 It wouldn't be a "just one night" commitment, as for the host family there would also be cleaning, clearing a space, buying and preparing food, entertaining guests, cleaning up, and being responsible for a large group of teens. I would be very uncomfortable having to be "on" as a hostess for so many guests. If you want to do it and your DD is willing and able to take responsibility for much of the prep work and entertainment--great. But if you don't want to and would only agree because you'd feel guilty saying no, then don't. She will still have fond memories if another family hosts. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
regentrude Posted September 13, 2014 Share Posted September 13, 2014 It's just one night. I disagree that you'd be responsible for "entertaining" them - at 17, girls are perfectly capable of entertaining themselves (and would probably prefer to do so) Start after dinner and make it a potluck where everybody brings snacks; you provide only breakfast. Make sure your DD understands that, if you host, she will need to help with preparation and cleanup. Get earplugs or a few nice movies and coffee- it will be loud, and you won't get much sleep before 3am. I'd never agree to hosting that many 8 year olds. But older teens - sure. ETA: I don't think being extroverted or not has anything to do with it. I am extroverted and love people - but I need a lot of sleep and go to bed early, and when my DD has company, these are her friends, not mine, and I am expected to stay out of their way, LOL. 2nd ETA: Several people mentioned cleaning before the sleepover. Assuming your house is normally reasonably clean, that would be a wasted effort - the cleaning needs to happen after the party. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Caroline Posted September 13, 2014 Share Posted September 13, 2014 I'm an introvert. We have hosted pasta dinner for the boys soccer team a couple of times. It's a ton of fun. The kids entertain themselves. All I do is clean the house before hand. (Okay, I have my cleaning ladies come an extra time.) Honestly, the boys clean up after themselves. The first time I started washing up the dishes before sending them home with the boys, but the veteran moms who were there to help told me that wasn't necessary. I love my peace and quiet in the evenings. I am a high school teacher, so I spend all day every day with other people's kids. When I come home, I need a break. But it's one night a year. I can do anything for one night. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Word Nerd Posted September 13, 2014 Share Posted September 13, 2014 2nd ETA: Several people mentioned cleaning before the sleepover. Assuming your house is normally reasonably clean, that would be a wasted effort - the cleaning needs to happen after the party. If you don't feel any need to do extra cleaning before having overnight houseguests, I think you'd be an exception. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted September 13, 2014 Share Posted September 13, 2014 I'd make sure the calendar was blocked from any scheduling after the party was over so I could recover and treat myself to something. If you go through with it, your dd will have a special memory from senior year that you made happen. Oh! You make such a good point about "recovery"! I don't think I would have thought of it, but that would be very good for me and probably for dd, too. And you're right about the special memory, too. It's kind of nice that this is her last year, so this would be the first AND last time I would host. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
texasmama Posted September 13, 2014 Share Posted September 13, 2014 I think you should do it. Great memories for your dd lots of "mom points", to boot! It is good to get to know dd's friends a bit better, as well. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted September 13, 2014 Share Posted September 13, 2014 If you don't feel any need to do extra cleaning before having overnight houseguests, I think you'd be an exception. There will be extra cleaning beforehand, but in a way, I'm glad. It will "force" me to address some things around the house that I've put off. Dh's "honey-do" list, too. I might pick the brain of the woman who has done it for the last four years. She might know some things I haven't thought of yet. I know in the past, she told the girls they could not shower. Probably wise, just considering the amount of water, electricity, and time that could occupy. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Caroline Posted September 13, 2014 Share Posted September 13, 2014 There will be extra cleaning beforehand, but in a way, I'm glad. It will "force" me to address some things around the house that I've put off. Dh's "honey-do" list, too. I might pick the brain of the woman who has done it for the last four years. She might know some things I haven't thought of yet. I know in the past, she told the girls they could not shower. Probably wise, just considering the amount of water, electricity, and time that could occupy. Yes, absolutely get advice from the person who has hosted in the past. I have three more kids to get through high school, so I see lots of pasta parties in my future. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jenn- Posted September 13, 2014 Share Posted September 13, 2014 I'd do it if there was somewhere to deposit the boys overnight. I don't know if I would be comfortable as a mom of the other girls knowing there was a 15yo boy in the house. I think the girls would be able to cut loose and have more fun without worrying about a teenaged boy sneaking around trying to get involved. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RegularMom Posted September 13, 2014 Share Posted September 13, 2014 We've hosted a couple of large sleepovers. Yes, there's some cleaning and work involved, and the night of is noisy, but the girls just loved it, and made it all worthwhile. I say go for it! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Caroline Posted September 13, 2014 Share Posted September 13, 2014 I'd do it if there was somewhere to deposit the boys overnight. I don't know if I would be comfortable as a mom of the other girls knowing there was a 15yo boy in the house. I think the girls would be able to cut loose and have more fun without worrying about a teenaged boy sneaking around trying to get involved. I don't think anyone will be worried about her brother at all. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
regentrude Posted September 13, 2014 Share Posted September 13, 2014 I'd do it if there was somewhere to deposit the boys overnight. I don't know if I would be comfortable as a mom of the other girls knowing there was a 15yo boy in the house. I think the girls would be able to cut loose and have more fun without worrying about a teenaged boy sneaking around trying to get involved. Having both a 17 y/o girl who has her friends over frequently, and a 15 y/o boy, I don't think 17 year old girls would give much thought to, let alone worry about, a 15 y/o little brother. I also don't think a 15 y/o boy will "sneak around trying to get involved" with a large group of older girls. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Momofeat Posted September 13, 2014 Share Posted September 13, 2014 I would say "Go for it" too. I'm not much of a houseguest kind of person, but every time we've had a sleepover, whether large or small, we've made great memories that made it all worth it. I agree with the one who say that the kids can entertain themselves. You just need to make sure that you have a space to be alone. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Word Nerd Posted September 13, 2014 Share Posted September 13, 2014 I'd do it if there was somewhere to deposit the boys overnight. I don't know if I would be comfortable as a mom of the other girls knowing there was a 15yo boy in the house. I think the girls would be able to cut loose and have more fun without worrying about a teenaged boy sneaking around trying to get involved. That wouldn't even be on my radar, and I doubt it would be for any of the girls either. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
texasmama Posted September 13, 2014 Share Posted September 13, 2014 I grew up hosting all sorts of groups of friends for sleepovers in the teen years. I had a brother two years younger. It was never an issue to have him there. He was not interested in our silly goings-on. (We took turns calling Kentucky Fried Chicken and asking if they have big breasts. hehehe In my defense, this was middle school.) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
marbel Posted September 13, 2014 Share Posted September 13, 2014 I'd do it if there was somewhere to deposit the boys overnight. I don't know if I would be comfortable as a mom of the other girls knowing there was a 15yo boy in the house. I think the girls would be able to cut loose and have more fun without worrying about a teenaged boy sneaking around trying to get involved. I have heard people say this before and honestly as the mother of a teen boy (and a girl) I find it a little disturbing and even possibly offensive. (I am sure you did not mean it that way.) Boys should not have to leave their own homes because there's a group of girls over. I wonder if people suggest that girls should go away overnight if there's a group of boys over. (I know we are talking about a girl sleepover here but I am thinking of the bigger picture.) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted September 13, 2014 Share Posted September 13, 2014 I have heard people say this before and honestly as the mother of a teen boy (and a girl) I find it a little disturbing and even possibly offensive. (I am sure you did not mean it that way.) Boys should not have to leave their own homes because there's a group of girls over. I wonder if people suggest that girls should go away overnight if there's a group of boys over. (I know we are talking about a girl sleepover here but I am thinking of the bigger picture.) Yeah, here's my feeling on this: although I made a joke about my son, I cannot imagine this raising an issue. I won't permit him to be "in their business," though he clearly may be around while everyone has pizza or something. We have both a finished basement and a large room we call the "studio" in which the sleeping/nightime portion can happen. Unless he were to actually sneak in, he wouldn't be where they are at this part of the night. This is no different in my mind from times when my extended family has all been together at the beach house, and some of the kids bring friends. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted September 13, 2014 Share Posted September 13, 2014 That wouldn't even be on my radar, and I doubt it would be for any of the girls either. Yeah, and now that I think about it, the family who hosted in the past also has at least one younger brother. He is on the boy's soccer team with my son. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Reefgazer Posted September 13, 2014 Share Posted September 13, 2014 I'd do it. I don't let DD stay overnight, so the compromise is we are always the hosts (so we can keep control of things), even though I despise the whole sleepover business. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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