lewelma Posted March 2, 2014 Share Posted March 2, 2014 I hate discouraging people. When will I learn to keep my mouth shut!?! Ruth in NZ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
quark Posted March 2, 2014 Share Posted March 2, 2014 Perhaps it was for the best? You must include details! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
regentrude Posted March 2, 2014 Share Posted March 2, 2014 What happened??? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
maize Posted March 2, 2014 Share Posted March 2, 2014 No, many of us appreciate posts from outliers. It gives us a glimpse of possibilities far beyond the ordinary. I don't think you should avoid talking about your kids beyond the accelerated learner board. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
crazyforlatin Posted March 2, 2014 Share Posted March 2, 2014 I haven't been reading all of the threads, but I'll take a guess - it's that thread about when our kids started Pre-A or algebra? It wasn't discouraging if that's the one. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lewelma Posted March 2, 2014 Author Share Posted March 2, 2014 Yeah, it was that one. I was trying to make what I considered an important point but all anyone seemed to read was the age. Not mind blowing or anything, just one more time, sort of the last nail in the coffin. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MomatHWTK Posted March 2, 2014 Share Posted March 2, 2014 Only one person really fussed, and they seem to have overlooked the many posts that indicated 7th/8th grade was common. I remember being very surprised when my nephew was starting pre-A in 6th/7th at his ps. When I was a kid, 9th grade was "early." I think it is just a mental adjustment to get used to the newer grades/standards. But, being aware that everything is starting earlier than it did when I was in school, it would be foolish to think I was ahead of the game without checking those ps standards. KWIM? I know a ps family with two kids two years apart and both are taking Algebra at the same time. One is in middle school, the other in high school. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
regentrude Posted March 2, 2014 Share Posted March 2, 2014 Yeah, it was that one. I was trying to make what I considered an important point but all anyone seemed to read was the age. Not mind blowing or anything, just one more time, sort of the last nail in the coffin. You were making a point. Honestly, any parent needs to realize that abilities and interests vary widely, and I do not think it would be doing them a favor to let them believe that all children develop according to the identical time table. As for what is considered "average" or "typical", this is very easy to determine by looking at ps curricula. But it is important to know that kids do not have to be "typical". You do not have to hide your son's accomplishments. And you may have encouraged another parent who has a mathematically gifted child but not enough confidence to trust in his ability. Your experience with your son may help another family trust in their child's gift and stop second guessing whether it is "too early" or "too challenging" what their child demands. Our purpose on these boards is to share information with each other and be honest. Nothing is gained by withholding the truth just so nobody has to feel bad. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
crazyforlatin Posted March 2, 2014 Share Posted March 2, 2014 I understood what you said, learning to pay attention to what your kid needs, not what her age or grade dictates. In fact what you wrote about your older DS is very encouraging to me since I'm beginning to worry about AOPS Algebra. If we are ready to start but need a little more time to get through it, that's alright. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Connections Posted March 2, 2014 Share Posted March 2, 2014 Yeah, it was that one. I was trying to make what I considered an important point but all anyone seemed to read was the age. Not mind blowing or anything, just one more time, sort of the last nail in the coffin. Ruth- This board needs the type of honest posts that you provide. There is, of course, a spectrum of achievement, passion, intelligence, "giftedness", etc. Those who are on the high end of the spectrum need to be able to find others that they can relate to and frankly, they are so few in number in the entire population, that they are very difficult to find! You always write your posts with encouragement and humility and never make it sound like you are putting others down. Never. If anyone is reading anything into your posts I would suggest that the issue is with the reader, not with you! Please continue to share honestly here your advice and experiences- including ages of achievement and all! For some people, your posts offer a life line and reassurance that (1) they themselves are not crazy and (2) they are not completely alone! And I am sorry that you feel down. I can tell that you are always trying to be helpful and offer encouragement to others. You must feel like you have been dealt a blow. It takes a lot of time to write thoughtful posts and share your experiences. Please know that it was time well spent and is appreciated! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
8filltheheart Posted March 2, 2014 Share Posted March 2, 2014 Ruth, I don't think it was your post. I think it was the cumulative effect of all of the posts. I didn't directly respond to that thread's question bc the context of the OP just sort of sent up a red flag for me. Nothing was revealed about why the question was being asked. It was not an anonymous poll. It just seemed like setting up a thread for the reaction that the poster had.I have been posting on these forums for a very long time.....way before the 2008 change. After a while I have simply learned when to engage and when not to.....but even I tread where I shouldn't far too often. There was a recent thread on the SN forum that I should never have posted in, (my gut told me that I would regret it) but I did anyway. It happens to all of us.I wouldn't worry about it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
raptor_dad Posted March 2, 2014 Share Posted March 2, 2014 Ruth, I don't think it was your post. I think it was the cumulative effect of all of the posts. I didn't directly respond to that thread's question bc the context of the OP just sort of sent up a red flag for me. Nothing was revealed about why the question was being asked. It was not an anonymous poll. It just seemed like setting up a thread for the reaction that the poster had. I agree with 8. That whole thread was set up to lead to hurt feelings. The thing that frustrates me on that thread and dozens of others like them, is the level of casual anti-intellectualism and anti-elitism that comes out. Some of this venting is from older threads but with the same posters. The fact that people feel free to attack California's standards and suggest posters need to move out into "real" America is beyond the pale. I agree, algebra in 9th is fine, lots of colleges will give you a good education, lots of good jobs are available for people with non-academic backgrounds, etc etc. However, I reject the notion that it is somehow uppity and elitist to want to send your kids to your state flagship public university. Different colleges provide different opportunities. Not better or worse necessarily, but certainly *different*. If you want to go to grad school the differences between and Ivy and a state flagship are comparatively slight. The differences between any selective school and your non-research commuter campus of the state u is huge. Its not impossible to bridge but definitely a barrier. Same thing for certain types of jobs... So, teach algebra when your kids are ready. Take the time to do it right. However, don't try to deny that not taking Algebra1 thru PreCal in high school will effect college choices. Sorry for venting... but a number of these threads over the last year have left me with the same frustrations. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RemsMom Posted March 2, 2014 Share Posted March 2, 2014 I don't think my children are gifted, but I do believe they are very smart. I enjoy reading the posts here because I live in a "bottom of the barrel" state. I don't think my state has every ranked above 46th in the nation. But if you come to my town and talk to the parents you would think that every child here is gifted and every school is wonderful and extremely rigorous. You should have witnessed the number of angry parents when the new principal at the high school decided that the normal track for students in science would be Biology, Chemistry, and Physics. Up until this time most students were graduating with Biology as their highest level of science. When I attempted to point out that most universities expected students to take science up through Physics I was either ignored or treated like a snob. Thankfully, I can come here and read about other families that value education so I don't spend my time wondering if I really am the "crazy homeschool mom" (which I am sure is my reputation in my town). Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SanDiegoMom Posted March 2, 2014 Share Posted March 2, 2014 I mostly lurk here for advice as I am only after schooling until our move next year, but it has been this board and people like you, Ruth, who have provided the reassurance that it is okay to be so far off the "normal" route. I am homeschooling my son in math, who just turned 8 and is starting pre-Algrebra, because after spending time on these boards I realized there is a better way. My son, who lives and breathes math, is working at his own level while I am happily laying in new resources and learning different teaching methods and how to schedule AOPS when the time comes - which I would never have known about if it wasn't for these boards! So you have been an invaluable resource to me and my son, and I'm sure to countless others who silently benefit from your incredible insights in education. We are indebted to you! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
idnib Posted March 2, 2014 Share Posted March 2, 2014 I don't follow this board because neither of my kids seem accelerated. I do click on new posts and read whatever you post when I see it, so I ended up here. I love your posts and find them inspiring. It's because of reading your adventures in science fairs that we will be doing one in 2016. (The only one around here that takes homeschoolers is 6th grade and up.) A lot of time I realize we cannot do what you're doing at the same age, but I feel like we could 1-2 years older and that works for us. I'm more concerned with making things as rigorous as I can for my own kids and many of your posts have helped with that. Thank you so much for all the info you share. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SkateLeft Posted March 2, 2014 Share Posted March 2, 2014 Ruth, I agree with the others! l think you made excellent points in your post. I always appreciate your responses, because often times I feel like you say the things that I want to say, only much better than I ever could. I learned long ago to leave my kids' ages off my signature and keep my opinions to myself outside the high school and college boards, because some people like to wear their judgey panties when they post. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
quark Posted March 2, 2014 Share Posted March 2, 2014 Ruth, others have already provided great feedback. I wanted to post an answer to that thread and this one but forced myself to wait one night. I am too thin skinned. Enough to stay up at night worrying if I think I have posted something that sounded braggy or hurtful even if that was not my intention. :( You know how often I go back and delete posts. :P I wrote a long post but you know what, it really doesn't matter. I am just going to keep following the spark in my son's eyes. And keep trusting him and my gut. Just like you are doing with your boys. Please know that when you share your journey, you are also inspiring others like me. I am really thankful that I found this board and that people who post here keep choosing to do so. :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
forty-two Posted March 2, 2014 Share Posted March 2, 2014 I don't post much, but I just wanted to say that you are one of the posters I really respect - so very interesting and thoughtful, while also being polite and encouraging. When I read something of yours, I don't just see more possibilities than I could see before, but I feel inspired (and able) to actually go do it myself :). Your posts show us more *and* show us how we, too, can get there, if we want :grouphug:. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
quark Posted March 2, 2014 Share Posted March 2, 2014 . Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gratia271 Posted March 2, 2014 Share Posted March 2, 2014 And you may have encouraged another parent who has a mathematically gifted child but not enough confidence to trust in his ability. Your experience with your son may help another family trust in their child's gift and stop second guessing whether it is "too early" or "too challenging" what their child demands.Our purpose on these boards is to share information with each other and be honest. Nothing is gained by withholding the truth just so nobody has to feel bad. I agree with this. When I joined the board several years ago, I felt like I could finally share about my children. It helped tremendously and was a great source of encouragement, unlike "real world" encounters. I have been away from the boards for so long now, since I have been caring for my brother's disabled son along with teaching my three children. But I know posts like yours will encourage others. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CrunchyGirl Posted March 3, 2014 Share Posted March 3, 2014 Just wanted to chime in that I am so encouraged by your posts Ruth. There are some of us who are facing significant challenges associated with accelerated kids and reading your posts props me up and gives me hope. It's unfortunate so many people on that thread seemed to be so offended by the thought that children can be intellectually ready for certain topics at an earlier age than the American standard dictates. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kathy in Richmond Posted March 3, 2014 Share Posted March 3, 2014 Ruth, I have to echo the others here in saying that I have never known you to be anything but kind, encouraging, and quick to offer help & guidance to others. Please continue posting! :) Raising an outlier like your son can be a lonely road to follow. Sometimes places like the WTM boards are the only way to reach fellow travelers, to hear their stories, to share what works, & to support one another. It's not an easy task; there are often as many struggles (intensities, asynchronies, perfectionism struggles...) as joys along the way. I still find it difficult to be honest & open most of the time, but these boards are as welcoming a place as any. I mostly lurk here for advice as I am only after schooling until our move next year, but it has been this board and people like you, Ruth, who have provided the reassurance that it is okay to be so far off the "normal" route. I am homeschooling my son in math, who just turned 8 and is starting pre-Algrebra, because after spending time on these boards I realized there is a better way. My son, who lives and breathes math, is working at his own level while I am happily laying in new resources and learning different teaching methods and how to schedule AOPS when the time comes - which I would never have known about if it wasn't for these boards! So you have been an invaluable resource to me and my son, and I'm sure to countless others who silently benefit from your incredible insights in education. We are indebted to you! SanDiegoMom, do you know about the San Diego Math Circle? Their programs start as early as late elementary school; their schedule (click on the 2013-2014 Master Calendar under the Class Schedules link on the left) makes me drool! Plus, some of the AoPS staffers teach there! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Black-eyed Suzan Posted March 3, 2014 Share Posted March 3, 2014 Ruth, I don't know what thread you are referring to, but I will echo the sentiments of everyone else. You are extremely encouraging to me personally and I have never detected a negative tone in any of your posts I have read. Please continue to share your wisdom! Hugs! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lewelma Posted March 3, 2014 Author Share Posted March 3, 2014 Thanks everyone! You definitely cheered me up from my late night pity party. :001_smile: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lewelma Posted March 3, 2014 Author Share Posted March 3, 2014 . Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
boscopup Posted March 3, 2014 Share Posted March 3, 2014 The OP in that thread asked a question that included outliers, and her own child is starting prealgebra a little earlier than the norm (age 11), so I don't think your post was out of line at all. That some people take offense, well... that's their problem. I have a 7 year old who has struggled to learn to read, but I don't get offended when someone says their 4 or 5 year old is reading Harry Potter on their own. Why on earth would that bother me? I know where my child is. I know where the "norm" is. I know there are kids above and below that "norm". And I know that my child's future does not depend on being above the norm. I honestly do not understand why someone would feel bad that their child isn't doing something that is so clearly beyond the norm. My mind does not compute that way. Goodness, there are PG kids here that do things I can't even dream of any of my children ever doing, and I can't imagine taking offense at that. Taking notes from lectures at 6 years old? Not happening here. Even my 9 year old isn't ready to take notes. :lol: I'm not offended that someone else's kid does though. Likewise, I don't get offended when someone's kid learned to tie their shoes or ride a bike before my oldest did (he JUST learned to ride a bike a couple weeks ago at age 9.5... seriously). Why would that bother me? I just don't get it. People in this world seem to look for things to get offended about. :tongue_smilie: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
EndOfOrdinary Posted March 17, 2014 Share Posted March 17, 2014 If it makes you feel any better, I come back and read these comments when I have posted something that someone immediately wants to get upset about because it is too challenging, too complex, or that is far too mature. It is a pick me up when I have encountered another person that somehow is threatened by my experiences. So, in a sense, your post lead to trickle down inspiration. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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