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What to feed my dd's Muslim friend for Christmas dinner...


JFSinIL
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Obviously not pork, I got that from google. But not the usual cheese pizza that is our usual meal when my "spare daughter" ;-) is here for a sleepover. Not for Christmas dinner! Muslim moms - can she eat roast beef? Or just veggies and cake and cookies (all the local teens love to chow down on my baked goods, but I want something healthier for her to eat!)

 

She'll be coming over after we do our tree as I don't think it would be much fun watching us wallow in presents. DD agrees. If I fill a small stocking for her (or dd does) is that o.k.?

 

I'd ask her mom - but her English is not the best and I have a hard time understanding her.

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Muslims eat beef, lamb, poultry, and all plants. Depending on how devout they are they may not eat these meats unless they are halal. We will eat fish (doesn't have to be halal) and some Muslims eat shellfish (usually shrimp, not so much oysters or mussels etc.)

 

I'd go with something fish or vegetarian if it were me. As far as filling her stocking, candies should be fine. (No bacon chocolate bars!) :laugh:

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I would stick to fish or vege.

And if she is coming over that day, i would skip the "present" as that would put her in an uncomfotable and questionable position. Her parents may or may not have taught her, but she would probably not want to accept it as it is a symbol of something you do, not a muslim holiday or tradition. Usually if muslims are knowledgable about their religion ( and unfortuantly some are not) they do not participate in non-muslim traditions. I don't visit my non-muslim freinds/family on that day because i don't want to deal with all that. I may get flamed for this but it is the truth.

 

Please excuse typos i'm on my nook!

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One thing to be careful of is salad dressing made with vinegar -- made from alcohol. My Muslim friends use lemon juice instead.

And according to islamic law we can use vinegar as long as it has not turned to wine. I studied extensively for almost 17 years from many countries and this is the 1st time i heard this unless maybe she is from Iran.

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One thing to be careful of is salad dressing made with vinegar -- made from alcohol. My Muslim friends use lemon juice instead.

And according to islamic law we can use vinegar as long as it has not turned to wine. I studied extensively for almost 17 years from many countries and this is the 1st time i heard this unless maybe she is from Iran.

 

Posting my own quote, so you can see where the next is coming from. I once brought a beautiful salad to a party and I was asked (very kindly and politely) if I had used vinegar. Sadly, I had. I thought the hostess said that vinegar was made from wine -- perhaps she just needed to know more about the exact vinegar??? Hostess was from Pakistan, but she may have had concerns about other guests -- it was an interfaith Christian/Jewish/Muslim group.

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Some will not eat even if the meat is Halai because our cooking utensils are "contaminated". I would just buy cooked Halai food to serve as a dish, and serve more fruits.

 

Yes but it depends where you live. Not every place has cooked Halal food available. I would be surprised if she's that strict if she's coming for Christmas dinner. The Jews I know who keep kosher and are worried about contamination wouldn't just show up without making any arrangements or bringing their own food. :confused:

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Couldn't you ask the girl if there are any food restrictions? That way, you'd know what her particular family's standards are.

 

I've tried this...and seems everything under the sun...if she doesn't like it ...is suddenly not allowed. So I don't know how much has been a real instance of a food being not allowed vs...typical teen pickiness. I've had packaged Indian foods (veggie) that I know her mom buys, too and she won't go near them.

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Muslim moms - can she eat roast beef? Or just veggies and cake and cookies (all the local teens love to chow down on my baked goods, but I want something healthier for her to eat!)

 

She'll be coming over after we do our tree as I don't think it would be much fun watching us wallow in presents. DD agrees. If I fill a small stocking for her (or dd does) is that o.k.?

 

I'd ask her mom - but her English is not the best and I have a hard time understanding her.

 

How sweet are you! Other posters are right in that different families have varying levels of following the dietary law. Of course no pork, and the rule is that meats like beef and chicken should be halal slaughtered. However, if they've never said anything to you about the type of food she eats at your house and you refer to her as your "spare daughter" insinuating she's over a lot, then I'd assume her parents are ok with the meat. If my kids go to a friend's house who is non Muslim, then they know to decline the meat, or I talk to the moms first to avoid any misunderstanding. But, I do have friends who will eat any beef or chicken and not ask if it is halal or anything like that. So, yes, it depends on the family, but on the other hand, if it is a big deal to them I'd think they would say something first.

 

Since you were so thoughtful to ask here, why not just try asking her mom and see what you understand from her?? Hehehe... mabye you could pick up a word or two?

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And according to islamic law we can use vinegar as long as it has not turned to wine. I studied extensively for almost 17 years from many countries and this is the 1st time i heard this unless maybe she is from Iran.

 

 

I don't know much about Islamic Law, but I do know about making vinegar. Vinegar is made from wine.

wine turns to vinegar, not the other way.

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I don't know much about Islamic Law, but I do know about making vinegar. Vinegar is made from wine.

wine turns to vinegar, not the other way.

 

 

And when it turns to vinegar it is not wine (only trace alcohol) anymore, so it is fine.

 

The Islamic law gets kind of complex (depending which schools of jurisprudence one follows) as some hold that wine that naturally turns to vinegar is fine but wine that requires human intervention by Muslims is not. That is because they don't want Muslims messing with wine. But Christians or Jews making wine for Muslims removes the problem.

 

There are always tiny minorities who might take things to the extreme, but vinegar is not wine. So it has no cause for being labeled haram.

 

Bill.

 

 

 

 

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If she has already eaten at your house often, I don't think you need to over-stress about it. Has the cheese pizza been her request or your suggestion? Some Muslims simply don't eat pork, some won't eat any meat that isn't dhabiha (ritually slaughtered in the Islamic method) or kosher. When we are fixing a big dinner with my non-Muslim parents I will usually get a kosher turkey (we can get those easily at the local grocery chain), and kosher chicken broth for recipes calling for it.

 

I agree with whoever said that if she's coming to your house for Christmas dinner that implies more flexibility in and of itself. If there were issues, for example, with utensils and "contamination" for her family, I feel confident she wouldn't have eaten at your house at all in the past, kwim? I think it's nice that you are giving a nod to her culture, but I personally would go with something like a kosher turkey, or your regular beef roast or whatever and a seafood/vegetarian pasta additional dish, and just mention to her what's in diffferent dishes. Surely she's old enough (how old is she?) to make choices appropriate to her?

 

It's really hard to predict how people interpret the Muslim dietary laws within their own families, there is such a range of practice. And I wouldn't want you to put yourself in a position where you are so concerned with that that you aren't enjoying your day, kwim?

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And if she is coming over that day, i would skip the "present" as that would put her in an uncomfotable and questionable position. Her parents may or may not have taught her, but she would probably not want to accept it as it is a symbol of something you do, not a muslim holiday or tradition..

If she or her parents felt this way I am confident she/they would not be going to someone's house for Christmas dinner.
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OK - I'm going with our usual beef tenderloin, and she can eat it or not - there will be plenty of other non-meat goodies to eat (just no cheese pizza! I'm not catering to what I am pretty sure is a lot of teen pickiness disguised as dietary rules in this teen's case!). She can get a stocking with the usual teen goodies - dd knows what she likes. I agree, if they family was strict about hala etc. they wouldn't let her come over so much, much less on Christmas (unless....they don't know about the girls' plan yet ! Sneaky 16-yr-olds!).

 

She really is my "spare daughter" - I let the kids know that when they are in my house I am the mom there and in charge :-) They don't seem to mind - they keep showing up! And some of them call me "Extra mom".or "Second mom".

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And when it turns to vinegar it is not wine (only trace alcohol) anymore, so it is fine.

 

The Islamic law gets kind of complex (depending which schools of jurisprudence one follows) as some hold that wine that naturally turns to vinegar is fine but wine that requires human intervention by Muslims is not. That is because they don't want Muslims messing with wine. But Christians or Jews making wine for Muslims removes the problem.

 

There are always tiny minorities who might take things to the extreme, but vinegar is not wine. So it has no cause for being labeled haram.

 

Bill.

 

 

thanks for the elaboration. :D

I was responding to the poster who thought that wine came form vinegar.

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I don't know much about Islamic Law, but I do know about making vinegar. Vinegar is made from wine.

wine turns to vinegar, not the other way.

 

And when it turns to vinegar it is not wine (only trace alcohol) anymore, so it is fine.

 

The Islamic law gets kind of complex (depending which schools of jurisprudence one follows) as some hold that wine that naturally turns to vinegar is fine but wine that requires human intervention by Muslims is not. That is because they don't want Muslims messing with wine. But Christians or Jews making wine for Muslims removes the problem.

 

There are always tiny minorities who might take things to the extreme, but vinegar is not wine. So it has no cause for being labeled haram.

 

Bill.

 

 

Melissa -- thank you. You have jogged my memory -- my hostess said something about not being sure all the wine had turned to vinegar, i.e. that there might be some wine left.

 

Bill -- I'm not an expert in Muslim diet. I was sharing what one person (who had no reason to lie, lol) told me. The party I was at had about 20-30 Muslims, all from different countries. Someone, somewhere is concerned about vinegar.

 

In any case, none of that seems pertinent to OP's concerns, as her 'second daughter' sounds pretty flexible (minus the teenage food cravings)!

 

OP -- sounds like a wonderful Christmas menu!

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