HappyLady Posted October 15, 2012 Share Posted October 15, 2012 Long story short, I've never had a good relationship with my mother. She did, however, seem to really love my children for awhile, but she has not bothered to contact/see them in 10 months now, even though she lives 20 minutes away. She even missed my DS's 2nd birthday (said she would be there, didn't show up, no apologies, no recognition of his birthday). Now I find out from my sister (my mom has yet to tell me personally) that she's moving to another state to live with a man she met online. My sister was over the other day and she said our mom said to her about me, "Doesn't your sister even care that I'm moving?" because I haven't contacted her about it. Now, she hasn't bothered to contact me in 10 months, she missed my DS's (and technically my DD's as well - she was sick) birthday, she hasn't told me she's moving, but *I* am suppose to contact her now?? Unfortunately I do have to speak to her at some point because I have to get some of my stuff out of her house, but I really don't feel I should be the one to reach out to her. WWYD? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Renthead Mommy Posted October 15, 2012 Share Posted October 15, 2012 If you want to see your stuff, suck it up and talk to her. You could turn the table on her and say "Were you even going to tell me you were moving? I had to find it out from your other daughter." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Annie G Posted October 15, 2012 Share Posted October 15, 2012 Since she has some of your stuff you want, you probably have to contact her. But it sounds like it's time to make a break, and also remind deal old mom that sister isn't a go-between. It's not fair to your relationship w your sister to put her in the middle like this, and your mom has to stop doing that. If she wants you to know something, she should tell you. Moving away to be with a guy she met on the internet? Yikes...that would worry me!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
marbel Posted October 15, 2012 Share Posted October 15, 2012 If you want to see your stuff, suck it up and talk to her. You could turn the table on her and say "Were you even going to tell me you were moving? I had to find it out from your other daughter." :iagree: Seems dangerous to wait for her to call you; she may throw out your stuff. Don't stand on principle, unless it's stuff you don't care about losing. I'm sorry your relationship with her is so bad. :grouphug::grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
********* Posted October 15, 2012 Share Posted October 15, 2012 If you want to see your stuff, suck it up and talk to her. You could turn the table on her and say "Were you even going to tell me you were moving? I had to find it out from your other daughter." Since she has some of your stuff you want, you probably have to contact her. But it sounds like it's time to make a break, and also remind deal old mom that sister isn't a go-between. It's not fair to your relationship w your sister to put her in the middle like this, and your mom has to stop doing that. If she wants you to know something, she should tell you. Moving away to be with a guy she met on the internet? Yikes...that would worry me!! :iagree: Seems dangerous to wait for her to call you; she may throw out your stuff. Don't stand on principle, unless it's stuff you don't care about losing. I'm sorry your relationship with her is so bad. :grouphug::grouphug: :iagree: These ladies are spot on. If you want your stuff, you're gonna have to contact her. I'm sorry for your relationship with your mom; it doesn't sound close at all. That stinks. And I know all about not being close with a mom. So :grouphug:. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tess in the Burbs Posted October 15, 2012 Share Posted October 15, 2012 You call, say you were told she's moving and you need to come get your stuff. When you see her at her house wish her the best, hand her a nice card with your address/phone and photo of kids inside. At that point it's up to her to give her new address or contact you. :grouphug::grouphug::grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Trish Posted October 15, 2012 Share Posted October 15, 2012 Unfortunately I do have to speak to her at some point because I have to get some of my stuff out of her house, but I really don't feel I should be the one to reach out to her. WWYD? Sorry she doesn't have much interest in your family. :grouphug: Yes, you should speak to her about getting your stuff. It isn't "reaching out," it's getting your stuff. The same way as if a stranger, acquaintance, neighbor or storage place had your stuff. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
In the Rain Posted October 15, 2012 Share Posted October 15, 2012 If you want to see your stuff, suck it up and talk to her. You could turn the table on her and say "Were you even going to tell me you were moving? I had to find it out from your other daughter." :iagree: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SKL Posted October 15, 2012 Share Posted October 15, 2012 I would call her, go over there, and shoot the breeze for a while. She's your mother. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Impish Posted October 15, 2012 Share Posted October 15, 2012 I would call her, go over there, and shoot the breeze for a while. She's your mother. An act of birth doesnt' denote a positive, or even existing relationship. OP, as others have said, if you want your things, you'd best call. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TheBugs Posted October 15, 2012 Share Posted October 15, 2012 :grouphug: I don't have any advice to give because I can't think straight because of all the mixed feelings I have about my mother. I also have a terrible relationship with my mother. She recently married a man and neglected to tell me about it...then things went really downhill. Too much drama for these forums... I just want to offer a hug and support. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fraidycat Posted October 15, 2012 Share Posted October 15, 2012 I have no advice, just hugs. :grouphug::grouphug::grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Catwoman Posted October 15, 2012 Share Posted October 15, 2012 I think it all depends on how badly you want your stuff. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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