Which is harder:

[Isabella]

I had girls 14 months apart & loved it, not too hard at all. Haven't had twins so no clue.

 

My great Aunt, though, (during WWll) had a singleton, then 9 months later had twins. I guess they were a little early. Her singleton didn't walk until 18mo old, so she had 3 immobile for 9 months. Town was just over a mile away, and no car, husband at war etc, etc. Don't know how she did it!

[swellmomma]

My oldest 2 are Irish Twins (they are 4 days shy of 11 months apart). I think it was harder to raise them than it would have been if they had been actual twins once the newborn stage is passed, only because unlike actual twins you are looking at different levels of devleopment but both still so young and needing momma so much (as opposed to say a 4 yr old an a new baby). In the end I have practically raised them as twins and most people assume they are. I have heard lots that people find the new born stage of twins hardest and then it gets easier. I found with my irish twins, that the newborn stage was easy but when I had 1 running full speed one direction at nearly 2, and teh other just learning how to toddle a few steps the other way it was very hard, in fact most of the toddler stage was hard. They jsut were not at the same stage of development to play together like they would have been if they were actual twins kwim. That said if I ever have actual twins I may end up coming back and changing my answer.

[swellmomma]

The only other aspect that may influence my experience is that my twins were premies, did NICU time, and ended up staying on the every-3-hour (24 hrs/day) feeding schedule for a very long time (6 months), and the sleep deprivation did me in. But twin toddlers are still harder than toddlers a year apart in age.

 

 

Maybe that is what is clouding my judgement too. Mine oldest was prem and a nicu baby and needed the every 3 hour feeding as well as meds until 4 months old to keep him breathing etc. DD was not prem but was very sick for the first 3 months (that's when we discovered her dairy allergy). My recoveries after both births was very rough. And both have special needs. Maybe if they had both been full term healthy singletons with no extra issues and regular uncomplicated births I would see twins as easier than irish twins. Who knows.

[rocketgirl]

yikes!! my "irish" twins are 14 months apart and the hardest parts were that my baby could'nt walk yet when my new baby was born, so I had a baby carrier in one hand, and a big sweet baby in the other :) and Ages 1-2 were just plain hard (but yet so awesome too), but it got much easier after that and while my girls are polar opposites, they are still the best of friends :) I overheard my 8 year old explaining to my 7 year old that if she moves to New York when she grows up, she would miss her very much.

[unsinkable]

Okay, to avoid offending anyone, I'll call ours Catholic twins.;) .

 

By changing it to Catholic twins, you are just switching the target of the stereotype from Irish to Catholic.

 

IOW, if it is wrong to call children less than a year apart Irish twins because it implies X, Y and Z about the Irish then it is just as wrong to call them Catholic twins because it implies A, B and C about Catholics.

 

I think over 70% of Ireland is Roman Catholic so I think that the term Irish twins might already have been implying Irish Catholics.

[MariannNOVA]

Having experienced both, I found that twins kicked my butt.

[mycalling]

I've experienced two 15mo apart, then twins, then two 15mo, and now will have 2 16mo apart.

 

Before walking and eating of solids, the twins were far harder, but after that they were easier than pregnancy and nursing while keeping after a little one then two little ones in differently needy stages. A twin pregnancy with a 1 and 2yo was miserable, but being pregnant with a needy infant seems harder. The lifting, the nursing while pregnant...but nursing twins while pregnant took the cake.

 

Hmmm...so I'm going with: it all sucks worse while you're experiencing it!:tongue_smilie:

[craftyerin]

I have both, at the same time. My singleton is 2 days shy of 12 months older than my twins (I guess the three of them are Irish triplets?). The combo is so completely difficult that it's hard to pick out which part is hardest (the 12 month space, or the twins). I think the twins, but I really can't tell. It's killer!! And fun. :D

[bpskowski]

In the beginning, my colicky, crying for 9 months twins stunk! I kept repeating over and over, "At least their not triplets." (Sorry triplet mothers.) They were at high risk during pregnancy so I spent 2 months in the hospital prior to their birth and then they were 3 weeks in NICU. At the time I thought it was absolutely horrible: my 3 year old was 2 hours away and I only was able to see him for a couple of hours 2X a week. Then I left the hospital. Oh my! I wished I was back in the hospital! I had more quality time with my son there then at home. After about 9 months the colic went away. Then they started to roll over and do all the normal baby progression "stuff". Once they started walking at about 14 months it became fun. And now at 3 years, I think they are definitely easier then a singleton.

 

Also, now that I'm sleeping again and enjoying all the kids, I realize how blessed I really am. Everyone is healthy. And every time I hear of someone who has some real ongoing challenging issues, I feel guilty for even thinking of putting the twins at the curb for pick up. :blush: (Even if it was for a fleeting second, during a breast infection and 102 tempature.)

[Spock]

Yup, I thought of that after posting! :lol:

 

Mine are 14 or 15 mos apt, & I agree w/ your statement--challenging, WAY challenging to about 3yo, then things start getting easier.

 

Which is what led me to the question in the first place. I've always assumed twins were harder, but...pulling a 1yo out of the trashcan while 9mos pg does have its own challenges! :D

 

I haven't had actual twins, but my first two are 15mo apart, and my second two are 16 mo apart (with a gap of 6.5 years between pairs).

 

I also think the hardest part is when they are under three. However, I would specify that the very hardest part is when you have 2 little ones who are old enough to run off in 2 different directions, but are too little to know how to obey (come back when called/stay put when asked/know where they can and can't go/etc.).

 

So, for mine, the hardest part was from the time the younger of the pair was around 9-10 months and a solid walker until the time the younger was 3 (and the older 4) and they were both better at listening and obeying.

 

Also, my younger pair is significantly more challenging than my older two ever were, so personality (and ADHD for my youngest) also plays a role.

[Melissa in Australia]

Twins or Irish twins (15-ish mos apt or less)?

 

Just curious.:bigear:

My mother had both, she had a 11 month old when she had twins :001_smile:

It is the closest you can get to having triplets. It was hard work, I remembre I was 11.

 

she had 5 other children, plus that year she was fostering my stepbrothers siblings.

[Sugarfoot]

By changing it to Catholic twins, you are just switching the target of the stereotype from Irish to Catholic.

 

IOW, if it is wrong to call children less than a year apart Irish twins because it implies X, Y and Z about the Irish then it is just as wrong to call them Catholic twins because it implies A, B and C about Catholics.

 

I think over 70% of Ireland is Roman Catholic so I think that the term Irish twins might already have been implying Irish Catholics.

 

I was joking, sorry if it didn't come across like that. It's not meant to be a sweeping judgement, or even to apply to anyone else at all. I'd never even heard it until the lady on the cruise ship said it to us.

[annandatje]

By changing it to Catholic twins, you are just switching the target of the stereotype from Irish to Catholic.

 

IOW, if it is wrong to call children less than a year apart Irish twins because it implies X, Y and Z about the Irish then it is just as wrong to call them Catholic twins because it implies A, B and C about Catholics.

 

I think over 70% of Ireland is Roman Catholic so I think that the term Irish twins might already have been implying Irish Catholics.

 

 

I thought "Irish twins" was considered a derogatory term clearly referring to Irish Catholic families who eschewed birth control. Maybe it is one of those phrases that is not considered inflammatory anymore. Or maybe it ultimately depends again upon speaker's intent.

 

I once read that the word cult did not originally have the negative connotations that it does today.

 

My guess is that having two closely spaced babies would be easier than dealing with two newborns simultaneously.

Edited October 3, 2011 by annandatje
To answer original question

[unsinkable]

I thought "Irish twins" was considered a derogatory term clearly referring to Irish Catholic families who eschewed birth control. Maybe it is one of those phrases that is not considered inflammatory anymore. Or maybe it ultimately depends again upon speaker's intent.

 

I once read that the word cult did not originally have the negative connotations that it does today.

 

My guess is that having two closely spaced babies would be easier than dealing with two newborns simultaneously.

 

I think we are agreeing with each other?!?!

 

:confused::)

 

My points were that the term Irish twins is offensive to some people, incl. people on the boards and that logically, (to me anyway), Catholic twins would imply the same thing.

 

I hope I am making sense.

[HS Mom in NC]

I am an Irish twin. As I understand it, the term means 2 singleton siblings born within 365 days of each other. My brother is 11 months and 3 days older than me. My mother said it was harder at first but got easier by ages 2 and 3.

 

My step-brothers that moved in when my mother got married (I was 3 and my Irish twin brother was 4) are also Irish twins. They were 11 and 12 at the time. They are 10. 5 months apart. They were never easy because they are The Odd Couple types and fought constantly as kids.

 

My step-dad and his X-wife are mostly French and Scottish. My mother and father are mostly Norwegian and German. None have any Catholic or Irish background that we know of. Don't assume the term carries loads of unspoken meaning by most people who use it. For example, people use the term "gyped" all the time and have no idea about its origins related to gypsies- it just doesn't mean that now to most people. No need to be offended. For a quick lesson on how dramatically meanings of words change, look up "nice" in an 1800s Noah Webster unabridged dictionary.

Edited October 3, 2011 by Homeschool Mom in AZ

[1GirlTwinBoys]

I had a 13 month old and then had twins. It's hard!!!! 3 in diapers for 2 years and mostly did cloth diapers. My kid's are sooooooo close and best pals. Since they've never been to any kind of school, they are just really tight since they've always been together.:)

[Aubrey]

I thought "Irish twins" was considered a derogatory term clearly referring to Irish Catholic families who eschewed birth control. Maybe it is one of those phrases that is not considered inflammatory anymore. Or maybe it ultimately depends again upon speaker's intent.

 

I once read that the word cult did not originally have the negative connotations that it does today.

 

My guess is that having two closely spaced babies would be easier than dealing with two newborns simultaneously.

 

I think I've only heard the term from my grandmother, who was referring to her own closely-spaced children. :001_smile:

[justamouse]

Twins or Irish twins (15-ish mos apt or less)?

 

Just curious.:bigear:

 

 

I've had both. :D

 

Twins.

[Georgiana Daniels]

I had NO idea kids 15 months or less apart were called Irish Twins. LOL--I have 'em!

 

When I first found out I was preggers again so soon, I panicked. I mean, wow, what were we going to do? BUT it has been the BEST thing for our family.

 

In no way does this answer the OP's question, but I don't have real twins to compare with :001_smile:

[Aubrey]

I had NO idea kids 15 months or less apart were called Irish Twins. LOL--I have 'em!

 

When I first found out I was preggers again so soon, I panicked. I mean, wow, what were we going to do? BUT it has been the BEST thing for our family.

 

In no way does this answer the OP's question, but I don't have real twins to compare with :001_smile:

 

I think pp who said less than 12 mos is more accurate, but I've heard the term...expanded a little. LOL

[eight_gregorys]

My sons are very close in age. I had one son, had twins 15-months-later, and then had another 11 months after the twins were born. We had four in diapers. While the twins were difficult in regards to getting used to nursing two....basically doing everything twice....my oldest son was by far the hardest as he had colic for 8 months. We were both miserable as I was pregnant with twins, had a child with colic, and a husband that was deployed in the middle of war zone.

 

Now that they are older (9, 8, 8, and 7), it is much easier. Once they can bathe, feed, and go to the bathroom themselves, life is much easier. Now its just sibling rivalry, but they mostly play together well and love each other.

 

I think every pregnancy and child is different, twins or not. Boys so far, have been a lot more difficult for me to raise, probably because I have three sisters and NO experience with how boys operate at a young age. I asked my husband many times, "What is wrong with them?". Lol....I've come to accept that they are just different and special in their own ways.

[KidsHappen]

My Irish Twins were the easiest kids of all. Of course, the fact that my mother and brother lived with us and we had two adults per child may have had something to do with it. They weaned, potty trained and started reading at the same time amoung other things so I only had to do all of those things once with the two of them. For some strange reason, people always thought that they were twins even though one was a head taller than the other, one was blond, the other was brunette and a ton of other differences. I never had real twins so I don't really know but it seems that they would be harderr. My hardest group were the youngest two and that may just be because I am old and won out and have less help than I did with the rest.

[mycalling]

I asked my husband many times, "What is wrong with them?". Lol....I've come to accept that they are just different and special in their own ways.

:lol: Me too, many, many times.

[Ewe Mama]

Irish twins are definitely harder in my book.