Heather in Neverland Posted March 31, 2011 Share Posted March 31, 2011 One step forward and about 42 steps back...sigh... The good news... After our last petition for Natalie's immigration was denied, we filed PILES upon PILES of waivers, additional documentation and anything else we could think of to get them to reconsider. Three months later... TODAY we received "the letter"... it was a letter from the USCIS telling us that they have approved Natalie's application to be classified as an orphan. We were ecstatic! BUT The letter makes it VERY clear that this does NOT guarantee that Natalie will ever get an immigrant visa. :glare: All they did was decide that yes, she IS eligible to be adopted by us (which is a good thing since we already adopted her). So check out this fun process: 1. the USCIS in Bangkok (the closest office to us) sends this approval to the National Visa Center in New Hampshire which will then send us a letter (all the way back to Malaysia) telling us that we need to fill out such-and-such forms and let us know that the embassy all the way back here in Malaysia will contact us for an interview. note: all those same forms are available online but it says not to fill them out until they say it is OK. what year is this??? 2. Natalie has to be examined by an "embassy-approved" physician. There is exactly 1 on the whole island. They want xrays, bloodwork, and a whole long list of vaccinations (which is upsetting as we are currently doing a very modified schedule of vaccinations and now we have to speed that up really fast). 3. after more paperwork, lots of shots, we have to go back to the embassy (5 hours away), pay even more money, and be interviewed. Then and only then will they maybe, possibly give her a visa... but she might also get denied. Seriously... I am starting to think this is some kind of money-making scam. We have spent thousands and thousands and still have more to spend and they STILL might deny her? Really? I swear if I see another sad commercial about all the orphans out there who need homes I am going to roundhouse-kick my TV set. Yeah, sure, go ahead and try to adopt one of these babies. I dare you. :cursing: :banghead: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Carrie12345 Posted March 31, 2011 Share Posted March 31, 2011 :grouphug::grouphug::grouphug::grouphug: I can't even begin to imagine the frustration! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Impish Posted March 31, 2011 Share Posted March 31, 2011 Awww, Heather :grouphug::grouphug::grouphug::grouphug: I'm so sorry for the difficulties you've endured and the challenges that lay ahead. :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dobela Posted March 31, 2011 Share Posted March 31, 2011 :grouphug: Pretty much everyone I know that has gone thru immigration has referred to it as a money scam because everytime they had to submit paperwork they were also required to submit money. It didn't matter if they had proof they submitted that form a dozen times - they still had to send money. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dayle in Guatemala Posted March 31, 2011 Share Posted March 31, 2011 :grouphug:Heather:grouphug: It's that way all over, which doesn't make you feel any better about your situation, but, it isn't just Malaysia. I have a friend here in Guatemala (2 actually) who have been done with their adoptions for almost 4 years and everything is good with Guatemala, but, they keep getting denied a visa for the US. They've had their lives on hold for 4 years trying to finish and all they need is for their embassy here in Guatemala to approve the visa. That's it. Everything else is completed and done and approved. They keep getting turned down. One of my friends had her dd's appendix rupture about 2 months ago and they were able to get a medical emergency visa so she could go to the US for the operation that she needs to get better. They are there now. The problem is, it's a temporary visa. They only have a certain number of days they can actually stay! I don't get it, but, that's the deal. Anyway, I'll be praying for your situation. It's so frustrating. So many times we've thought of adopting a child from here and I just can't. I'm so afraid of all that I've seen other families have to deal with and it's too much. The funny thing is, it's not Guatemala, it's the US!:001_huh: Sounds like the same things with you, it's not Malaysia, it's the US. Something has to change. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Heather in Neverland Posted March 31, 2011 Author Share Posted March 31, 2011 The funny thing is, it's not Guatemala, it's the US!:001_huh: Sounds like the same things with you, it's not Malaysia, it's the US. Something has to change. That's EXACTLY the problem. The Malaysian government has already moved on as far as our relationship with them is concerned. In fact, when I had to go back to the social services guy here in Malaysia and tell him I needed him to rewrite his home study report to include certain EXACT words the U.S. required (even though the report already contained that same information but with different wording)... he looked at me like I was crazy. I explained that it wasn't me who is crazy...it's the USCIS. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ElaineJ Posted March 31, 2011 Share Posted March 31, 2011 We have a son who was adopted from Vietnam, and I so understand what you are talking about! I pray that the situation will be resolved soon.....it is so stressful when it drags on indefinitely. :grouphug: I get that they need to be very careful that our kids are really in need of adopting and I am very willing to go through extra troublesome processes to make sure that everything is above board and in the best interests of the child. The problem is the amazing ineffciency of the US side! Soooooo much time and MONEY is spent getting pretty useless bureaucracy satisfied. I hope your sweet girl is legally settled soon with the same rights as your other family members and that you all can get on with the living life part- ElaineJ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jen500 Posted March 31, 2011 Share Posted March 31, 2011 Wow. Celebrities make it seem so easy to adopt internationally. Did anybody warn you about all of this before you started the adoption? I hope you get it all resolved. :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
FaithManor Posted March 31, 2011 Share Posted March 31, 2011 It's corruption in the U.S. system, pure and simple, a bureaucracy gone mad! We have friends that adopted from Brazil. Actually, their daughter came to them through a program that brings children to the states for medical care. She was born with spina bifida and was abandoned by her parents. They never, ever had one ounce of trouble with Brazil, NOT ONE! The U.S. was unbelievably ridiculous. At one immigration office, though she was standing there with file folders of medical records detailing Cida's medical problems, the immigration official demanded that P lift Cida's shirt and show him the scars from her surgeries. Heather, I am so sorry! How much do you like Malaysia? Enough to just stay and become citizens? I mean, I don't know what to tell you. The U.S. system is so broken that I don't believe it can be fixed. $50,000.00 and personal bankruptcy later, a teacher in San Francisco had to abandon her child back to the orphanage in Nicaragua she had adopted her from. Everything was fine on Nicaragua's end, which is saying a lot because the corruption in that government makes just about anywhere else in Latin America seem tame, but the U.S. embassy just would not approve the visa. She was stranded so long in Managua trying to get her child out, that after months and her money completely dried up, she had to drive her little girl back to the orphanage, drop her off, and leave the country. She can't go back. The Department of Familia was so mad at the U.S. for not approving the visa and the child being abandoned again, that they pressed charges. There's a warrant for her arrest for child abandonment (which just kind of cracks me up because it happens everyday all over Nicaragua and nobody does anything about it) and she'll be arrested if she ever goes back to see her child. She has completely lost hope and she lost her home bankrupting herself to help the child. It's 100% insane. Totally, completely, insane and I am soooooooooo sorry that you are caught up in it. I am thankful that Natalie is with you, being loved up, raised right, and not in the orphanage. ((((((((HUGS))))) Faith Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AuntieM Posted March 31, 2011 Share Posted March 31, 2011 Wow. Celebrities make it seem so easy to adopt internationally. Did anybody warn you about all of this before you started the adoption?I hope you get it all resolved. :grouphug: I'm pretty sure it's the ton-o-money factor that speeds the process for them. Sorry for your continued frustration, Heather. Wish I had a ton-o-money to share with you so your process could get in high gear. But we know that God's timing is perfect (though even that is often much easier considered in hindsight, isn't it?). Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mother Superior Posted March 31, 2011 Share Posted March 31, 2011 We had problems on the US side of things when we adopted Masha from Russia. My problems were not nearly as bad as yours, but still, I get it. Glad to hear things are progressing for you. :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nakia Posted March 31, 2011 Share Posted March 31, 2011 ARGH!!! How ridiculous! This really sucks. Praying for a miracle! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mom-ninja. Posted March 31, 2011 Share Posted March 31, 2011 I cannot imagine what it must be like to go through. It's mind boggling that it is this way. Why is it celebrities don't seem to have a problem? Money and fame buys all I guess. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lisa in Jax Posted March 31, 2011 Share Posted March 31, 2011 One step forward and about 42 steps back...sigh... The good news... After our last petition for Natalie's immigration was denied, we filed PILES upon PILES of waivers, additional documentation and anything else we could think of to get them to reconsider. Three months later... TODAY we received "the letter"... it was a letter from the USCIS telling us that they have approved Natalie's application to be classified as an orphan. We were ecstatic! BUT The letter makes it VERY clear that this does NOT guarantee that Natalie will ever get an immigrant visa. :glare: All they did was decide that yes, she IS eligible to be adopted by us (which is a good thing since we already adopted her). So check out this fun process: 1. the USCIS in Bangkok (the closest office to us) sends this approval to the National Visa Center in New Hampshire which will then send us a letter (all the way back to Malaysia) telling us that we need to fill out such-and-such forms and let us know that the embassy all the way back here in Malaysia will contact us for an interview. note: all those same forms are available online but it says not to fill them out until they say it is OK. what year is this??? 2. Natalie has to be examined by an "embassy-approved" physician. There is exactly 1 on the whole island. They want xrays, bloodwork, and a whole long list of vaccinations (which is upsetting as we are currently doing a very modified schedule of vaccinations and now we have to speed that up really fast). 3. after more paperwork, lots of shots, we have to go back to the embassy (5 hours away), pay even more money, and be interviewed. Then and only then will they maybe, possibly give her a visa... but she might also get denied. Seriously... I am starting to think this is some kind of money-making scam. We have spent thousands and thousands and still have more to spend and they STILL might deny her? Really? I swear if I see another sad commercial about all the orphans out there who need homes I am going to roundhouse-kick my TV set. Yeah, sure, go ahead and try to adopt one of these babies. I dare you. :cursing: :banghead: Ask your doc to talk to the immigration doc to see if a vaccine waiver can be signed, since you're doing a doctor-approved modified schedule. (We had to do so for our adopted kids (from India) when we went through BCIS. HIH, Lisa Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jenL Posted March 31, 2011 Share Posted March 31, 2011 I'm sorry, Heather! This has been such a process for you. It's just wrong how it is playing out. :grouphug: I am praying her visa is approved. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Heather in Neverland Posted March 31, 2011 Author Share Posted March 31, 2011 I'm sorry I sound like such a whiner. I am supremely grateful to have her in my life, I am just getting exhausted from the red tape nightmare. I know it will all work out eventually. I'm just...worn out I guess. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WyoSylvia Posted March 31, 2011 Share Posted March 31, 2011 I'm sorry I sound like such a whiner. HARDLY!!! I am so sorry you are going through this just to raise and love a needy child. That's terrible. I have no experience with anything like this but the only suggestion I can think of is this, have you perhaps talked to a member of congress from your home state to see if they will help you? Both sides of my family have done this in completely different scenarios and it worked both times. Praying for you and for other families enduring like yours. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ali in OR Posted March 31, 2011 Share Posted March 31, 2011 This may sound silly, but if you have a home state you might try getting your congress person involved. I occasionally read stories in our paper where our local senators and representatives have been able to resolve red-tape issues like this very quickly for their constituents. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Corraleno Posted March 31, 2011 Share Posted March 31, 2011 It's more than just money-making and incompetence (although there is plenty of that to go around); there are many INS employees who are vehemently anti-adoption and who go out of their way to interfere. IME this is particularly true of Embassy employees in Asia. I had an Embassy staff member tell me that if I had paid more than a few hundred dollars in processing fees, then I had "bought" my child and was guilty of "child trafficking." A friend of mine lost her child, who had been living with her for 2 months, after an Embassy employee located the birth mother and told her that the adoptive family were only adopting the baby to collect a "$10,000 bonus" from the US government, and that her child would basically be a servant; the mother took the baby back, although she was destitute and had no way to feed him. Many, many parents were harassed, intimidated, and had their visas held up for months, often forcing them to abandoned their children and return to the US or face losing their jobs. It's disgusting. ETA: I agree with contacting your Congressional reps in the US. When I was interviewed for my DD's visa, I made it VERY clear that I would be contacting my Senators, my Representative, and that I had already made contact with an immigration lawyer in the US who had a lot of experience dealing with these b@#$&*%s. My daughter's visa was one of only two that I knew of that were approved in 2 weeks — the rest of the families I knew waited up to 2 months or were denied. Jackie Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cindy in C-ville Posted March 31, 2011 Share Posted March 31, 2011 Oh, Heather. I am so sorry this is SO hard. I understand the frustration. All these babies and children who need homes, people who would love to give them homes, but the process is SO hard, SO complicated, and, dare I say, at times so corrupt. We got to the point with Katya that we looked at every bit of money we turned over (for legitimate fees as well as fax machines and decorator's allowance) as ransom money. The cost is high, my friend, not only monetarily but in time, energy, family relationships, professional relationships ... but so worth it. Press on. I'm praying for you! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Join the conversation
You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.