S/O of minimalist thread. When frugality and Minimalism don't mesh?

[mykdsmomy]

I am getting into the minimalist mindset and have my eye on The Joy of Less

 

However, as I go through my home to try and downsize, I realize that if I were to get rid of some things, I may be shooting myself in the foot. One of the concepts I'm learning from minimalism is to acquire higher quality rather than quantity. Well what if you can't afford to go buy a higher quality item so you have to make due with the tablecloth makeshift curtain in your kitchen? Do you take down the unsightly curtain and go without until you can afford the nice one you really want or do you just accept the inferior choice for the sake of frugality?

 

What about the homeschool curriculum that you may use someday for the little ones but is just taking up space right now?

 

We need to be as frugal as possible and not get rid of things we can't afford to purchase again later BUT....we simply do not have room to store "stuff". So how do you reconcile the two? Is there a good checklist somewhere? Sorry for making this more difficult than it probably needs to be :tongue_smilie:

[lionfamily1999]

We're in the same boat :D My curtains are sheets :p I sewed them up a bit to make them more curtainish ;) It's possible to be frugal and minimal. You just have to draw that line YOURSELF. We keep most of the curriculum we use, but I try to make sure what we use takes up minimal space to begin with. I buy more pdf classes than physical book classes (great space saver).

 

:grouphug:

 

Remember, nothing is really 'one size fits all' because we're all different. Mold these things to YOU.

[Carol in Cal.]

I'd keep the curtain for now, but I would identify that as an area of future work. That means that I would keep an eye out for ideas about what to replace it with ideally, and if something like that became available at a good price, I would be prepared to jump on it, in a way that I couldn't if I hadn't thought it through.

 

Keeping curriculum around--well, the question really is, what do you want more, the old curriculum or the space? Having the space free and attractive truly does have some value. The decision is not: Do I keep this old stuff around or not? The decision is: Is keeping this old stuff around worth the space it will take to do so, or is there another, better use for that space?

 

Don't let the good swallow the best.

[Abigail4476]

I would leave up the cheap curtain until you can afford a good one; no need to take it down. However, being frugal doesn't mean you can't buy quality items. I routinely shop at Marshall's, Tuesday Morning, Ross, Goodwill and consignment shops for linens, dishes and clothing. You can buy high quality linens at Tuesday Morning or Marshall's for around half the price you would pay at Macy's or Dillard's. Frugal doesn't just mean not spending money--it also means spending smaller amounts of money on higher quality items. When I buy a new, quality item, I immediately donate the old one to Goodwill so I don't accumulate more clutter. Once I've purchased a quality item, I don't purchase another one until that item actually needs replacing.

 

Keep a list of items needing replacement in your purse or daytimer and keep your eyes open.

 

Homeschool curriculum is particularly hard for me to part with, but after a couple of years of seeing books sit around unused and untouched, I made the decision to donate EVERYTHING at the end of each school year, unless I would definitely be using it again the following school year, with the exception of very expensive items. The first time was difficult, but now I can breath easier looking at my cabinets and bookshelves and seeing only the things I really need. I did box up a couple of years worth of my expensive BJU press teacher's manuals and student books for my son and labeled them by grade. He's in 2nd grade, and I have 5-6th grade in boxes. Those were worth saving, because those are expensive. However, I donated or tossed all of the half-used workbooks, test booklets, and all his Kindergarten and 1st grade materials. I also went through our bookshelves and donated all the books we will never read, keeping only educational, classics and favorites. The curriculum I kept is stored in waterproof boxes in the garden shed along with my Christmas decorations. If I hadn't had a shed to put them in, I would have donated those, too. I got really tired of the stacks and stacks of curriculum. :)

 

Being a "collector" of books or curriculum isn't frugal; it's a slow leak in your finances, especially if those things are never really touched. So only keep those things that you *know* you are going to use, and then only if you actually have storage space.

[stripe]

Do you take down the unsightly curtain and go without until you can afford the nice one you really want or do you just accept the inferior choice for the sake of frugality?

Why can't it be both. Keep what you've got until you can replace it. There really are cheap and tasteful items, though. Look at clearance and off season items, and don't rush to buy something. Keep your eyes peeled, you'll find a curtain.

 

What about the homeschool curriculum that you may use someday for the little ones but is just taking up space right now?

 

Maybe don't buy anything new until you're more sure you'll use it. Avoidance.

 

*ETA You could also try selling (for cheap, if you want, or the cost of shipping, or for whatever you paid) the homeschooling stuff you don't want, on here or other places like homeschoolclassifieds. That way you get rid of the excess and send it on to a new home.

Edited January 10, 2011 by stripe

[Carol in Cal.]

The other side to the 'keep that old curriculum' thing is whether you have reason to think abundantly. After homeschooling for 6 years, I found a Christian homeschooling group locally, a pretty big one, that has an Acts 4 table at each meeting. People bring in their unneeded materials for others to take. It makes it easier to let things go, because I know that they are going to someone who is also homeschooling and will probably use them, and I also know that there is at least a decent chance that I can get materials when I need them.

 

The hardest thing for me about donating materials is that I can't imagine how they will find a good home. This has solved that problem.

[KidsHappen]

I am running into the same problem. Over the last five years, our finances have become much tighter and I have been purchasing less and less stuff but somehow I am miraculously aquiring more and more stuff. Even though I am buying less stuff I find that I am less willing to get rid of stuff because I might need it some day and not be able to replace it. I could clothe and army of children that are younger than my youngest but I don't get rid of it because I find people in the family that eventually need it. I have three different size clothes for myself (because I frequnetly change sizes). I have at least two bed sets with matching accesories for each room. I can't part with a book to save my life. I have a large collection of miscellaneous dishware because I can't afford to buy a new complete set. I have about 15 different colored beach towels because I can't afford to buy a matching towel set. And on and on it goes. The poorer I become the more cluttered my house become. I am beginning to reaccess the reasons for hoarding. I am beginning to think that especially in older people it starts as a response to a decrease in means.

[Carol in Cal.]

The poorer I become the more cluttered my house become. I am beginning to reaccess the reasons for hoarding. I am beginning to think that especially in older people it starts as a response to a decrease in means.

 

 

I think that there is some truth to this. It's that feeling of abundance and material security that has to come from somewhere. Some get it from faith. Some get it from stuff. Some get it from income. And some get it from experiencing being able to get stuff without having much money, so that they conclude that it's likely that they will be able to repeat that. Probably most of us get it from a combination. I know I do.

 

Thrift stores and free exchanges help so much. I got a gorgeous, large crystal vase at a thrift store this last weekend for $7.50. It is exactly what I need for the flowers I grow, which tend to be roses, irises, and lilies. Now I will let go three other 'almost right' vases that I either got as gifts or bought at thrift stores in the past. I'll donate or gift them. That's true minimalism--I have had something 'almost' worked to get me by, and now I have something really good, and so I don't need to hold onto the other stuff. I can choose to bless someone else with it.

[elfgivas]

:grouphug: its a tough time!

 

i'm thinking that for the kids clothes at least, you could donate them now, because they could be a real blessing to someone right now, rather than a future potential blessing (or not) to someone in your family. what helps me is to imagine kids with no coats when my daughters have 3. if the child were in my front hall i wouldn't hesitate a second to give them a coat. so then i need to figure out that the child is in the front hall of my city, and just do it.

 

re towels. for most things, i try to calculate how many i reallllly need, and then double it. anything left over goes. so for a family of 7 we have 14 towels. 7 wet, 7 dry, most days... that is way over the top, and i won't buy to replace them once they're done, but i have them now, so.... i'm thinking 7 + 2 would work...

 

re dishes. if having them not match really bothers you, estates often end up donating whole sets to thrift stores after their estate sales. my dd got a complete set of franciscan country rose with serving dishes from a friend who found them that way... i think it was $10-

 

but its hard to have something and let it go when you don't know if you'll ever be able to get it again....

 

:grouphug:

ann

 

 

 

I am running into the same problem. Over the last five years, our finances have become much tighter and I have been purchasing less and less stuff but somehow I am miraculously aquiring more and more stuff. Even though I am buying less stuff I find that I am less willing to get rid of stuff because I might need it some day and not be able to replace it. I could clothe and army of children that are younger than my youngest but I don't get rid of it because I find people in the family that eventually need it. I have three different size clothes for myself (because I frequnetly change sizes). I have at least two bed sets with matching accesories for each room. I can't part with a book to save my life. I have a large collection of miscellaneous dishware because I can't afford to buy a new complete set. I have about 15 different colored beach towels because I can't afford to buy a matching towel set. And on and on it goes. The poorer I become the more cluttered my house become. I am beginning to reaccess the reasons for hoarding. I am beginning to think that especially in older people it starts as a response to a decrease in means.

[justasque]

I could clothe and army of children that are younger than my youngest but I don't get rid of it because I find people in the family that eventually need it.

 

This one is easy. If you don't have a designated cousin or relative who gets a particular kid's cast-offs, then you need another route. At many of the homeschool events I attend, there is a table for give-aways. When there isn't, I start one. I simply leave the clothes on the table with a sign - "free clothes, take one, take many, take all". At the end of the event, I take what's left home. If something has been to two or three events and not found a home, then I donate it. This is an ongoing process. Once I've designated something as a give-away, I put it in the give-away bag in my car. It doesn't come back in the house, but goes with us to various events and then on to the Goodwill if need be. So start a new trend at your co-op, or homeschool roller-skating event, or mom's night out event, or whatever it is you do with other homeschoolers. (Of course, it doesn't have to be homeschoolers. Events at your place of worship, your scout troop, and so on can also benefit.) The side-effect is that, once others join the trend you're setting, you may find that you can get clothes for your own kids this way. And I find it's easier to give away something that came from someone else this way than to give away something I spent $$ on and carefully chose.

[regentrude]

I could clothe and army of children that are younger than my youngest but I don't get rid of it because I find people in the family that eventually need it.

 

 

Then give it to them - if they are not willing to store it till "eventually" comes, then they must not really need it. Why should YOU clutter your house?

 

I have at least two bed sets with matching accesories for each room.

 

Why accessories?

 

I have a large collection of miscellaneous dishware because I can't afford to buy a new complete set. I have about 15 different colored beach towels because I can't afford to buy a matching towel set.

 

 

One does not need a matching set. You could still evaluate your items to see if you USE all of them. So, if you think you had fewer items if you had a matching set, throw out all items that would not be in the set.

I don't see the discrepancy between frugal and minimalist - the towels don't have to match, but maybe the number can be reduced.

[regentrude]

One of the concepts I'm learning from minimalism is to acquire higher quality rather than quantity. Well what if you can't afford to go buy a higher quality item so you have to make due with the tablecloth makeshift curtain in your kitchen? Do you take down the unsightly curtain and go without until you can afford the nice one you really want or do you just accept the inferior choice for the sake of frugality?

 

 

I think minimalism does NOT mean run out and replace things by more expensive things, but to aim for quality IF you have to make a purchase anyway.

I personally would do fine without any curtains;-)

 

What about the homeschool curriculum that you may use someday for the little ones but is just taking up space right now?

 

 

Can you lend it to somebody for use, with the understanding to get it back when your kids are old enough? Maybe in your homeschool group?

[Soror]

Like the pp I keep what I have but try to keep an eye on quality items that meet my needs at a good deal. When we moved back home after the fire we had to make do with a lot of items that didn't meet our needs well. Slowly I have replaced them with things that look and function better and hopefully last better. As time goes and money allows I see what I can find. So, I would keep the curtains for now and perhaps keep your eyes open for some to replace them. Whatever I replace I get rid of and it goes well I can get rid of more than I keep- 1 item that works well can replace several that don't.

 

I am debating on the clothes issue currently. I had saved most everything before but I am at a place now I don't think it is worth it. My current thought is to save the nicest stuff- church dresses and such- but play clothes and such I am donating. I can replace it for less than $1 a piece- often 50c or so from watching yard sales it is not worth the space and the hassle of rotating it around. I have the space to keep some currently though as we don't need all of our rooms in the basement as time goes and the rooms get filled even those things may go. Of course the baby clothes are cheap and easy to replace anyway and the older kids are more likely to wear out their clothes. I wouldn't store things for other either, if they need it they can take it.

[2squared]

Do you take down the unsightly curtain and go without until you can afford the nice one you really want or do you just accept the inferior choice for the sake of frugality?

 

I would go without rather than look at something I consider ugly. Ugly would clutter my mind, and my mind needs to be uncluttered I also like coming up with other solutions like maybe cheap, unobtrusive blinds that would be functional but not ugly.

 

What about the homeschool curriculum that you may use someday for the little ones but is just taking up space right now?

 

The key word here is "may." If I may use it, it goes. If I "will" use it, it stays. Note that my dc are stair stepped every two years, so this may be easier decision for me.

 

We need to be as frugal as possible and not get rid of things we can't afford to purchase again later BUT....we simply do not have room to store "stuff". So how do you reconcile the two? Is there a good checklist somewhere? Sorry for making this more difficult than it probably needs to be :tongue_smilie:

 

It would depend on the stuff in question. I toss quickly, but I was burnt last year by tossing ALL my baby stuff.

[2squared]

Clothes are a bit of a challenge. I hate taking up time shopping (time clutter), so I don't hit garages sales and thrift stores for kid clothing. I save one tub of clothing per size per sex and everything else goes. I try to keep my dc's clothes to a minimal level - five pants, five shirts, one pair of pajamas/sweats, two pairs of shoes, etc. My hope/plan is that the clothes wear out so I don't have to store them for the next dc. Storage tubs cost money (financial clutter) and take up space (visual clutter).

[Abigail4476]

I would go without rather than look at something I consider ugly. Ugly would clutter my mind, and my mind needs to be uncluttered I also like coming up with other solutions like maybe cheap, unobtrusive blinds that would be functional but not ugly.

 

:iagree:

 

I took down the curtains from my living room windows because I love the view and hated the curtains. However, my husband complained because of the lack of privacy, and I can't afford the curtains with custom rods that will be required to suit us both. I found paper blinds at Walmart for $3.50 each that can be cut to fit any window. Mini-blinds are cheap, too, but I hate them, so that wasn't an option for me.

 

I thumb-tacked the paper blinds at the top of the window because the peel-and-stick strip at the top didn't look sturdy enough. They look amazingly good, block light pretty well, and when I need my view, I use the clips that were included to clip them up, folding them up accordion style. I'd rather look at those $14 paper blinds than the old, lousy curtains that were up there before. :tongue_smilie: I'm content to have up simple blinds until I can afford the real deal.

 

Similar Blinds from Home Depot

Edited January 10, 2011 by Abigail4476

[mykdsmomy]

Thank you all for the great responses! I had a bit of a rough day because our toilets backed up into our shower and made for a disgusting clean up and wasted time :(

 

I have been trying to figure out the boys' room and it's killing me. To get rid of the dressers that take up the very limited space they have in their room or hang on to them? Sometimes it's the big decisions that will stall progress. :glare:

 

I liked the idea that "ugly" clutters the mind. It's soooo true! For the sake of frugality, I will often just make due with something but I don't like it. I don't cherish it, so I tend to lose respect for it and it winds up getting replaced with yet another inferior product just to have a change!

 

I think another key to minimalism is really cherishing the few items that you do have.

[2squared]

We limit what we bring into our house based on my very strong desires to

1) not clean

2) not manage stuff

3) not spend money

4) not spend time looking for new stuff

 

If I liked shopping, spending money, or cleaning, I would probably like stuff a whole lot more. :001_smile: I greatly enjoy streamlining my life, seeing empty space, and creatively repurposing. Therefore, not owning a lot of stuff is perfect for me.

 

I also harbor guilt for spending money on things that weren't right or didn't work out. When those things leave my life, I feel much better.

[BlsdMama]

I am getting into the minimalist mindset and have my eye on The Joy of Less

 

However, as I go through my home to try and downsize, I realize that if I were to get rid of some things, I may be shooting myself in the foot. One of the concepts I'm learning from minimalism is to acquire higher quality rather than quantity. Well what if you can't afford to go buy a higher quality item so you have to make due with the tablecloth makeshift curtain in your kitchen? Do you take down the unsightly curtain and go without until you can afford the nice one you really want or do you just accept the inferior choice for the sake of frugality?

 

What about the homeschool curriculum that you may use someday for the little ones but is just taking up space right now?

 

We need to be as frugal as possible and not get rid of things we can't afford to purchase again later BUT....we simply do not have room to store "stuff". So how do you reconcile the two? Is there a good checklist somewhere? Sorry for making this more difficult than it probably needs to be :tongue_smilie:

 

For ME, the two go absolutely hand in hand. I think it depends on the person though.

 

There is nothing wrong in this world with a makeshift curtain as a tablecloth. Even less so with the world map as your tablecloth because then you have dual duty, lol. :D

 

As far as homeschooling curriculum I have no problem with buying used then selling used. I virtually lose zero money and get my use out of it. If it's something I KNOW I'll use again, then I keep it. But experience has taught me that often what curriculum worked for one child, doesn't work for the next so hanging on to it for the sake of hanging on to it rarely makes sense. If it has a PURPOSE, then it's worth keeping. If it doesn't then it needs to be gone.

 

And I don't think cheap necessarily equates to ugly. Take the ugly curtain, undye it, then dye it. Take the ugly curtain, dress it up. The word is UPCYCLE and when you master this little thing, you walk into Goodwill with a whole new perspective. I can take a hideous shirt, cut it apart and make a beautiful Waldorf doll... for pennies. No one would know it wasn't a $50 doll. I can cut apart $2 sheets and make an apron and a bonnet for dress up clothes and matching napkins for the dinner table.

 

I do NOT get rid of all clothing. What I do instead is buy carefully - usually Goodwill or garage sales, but I try not to buy the cute, trendy dress so much as I do the cute little polo top or the smock top that will look nice with ANY skirt, or ANY jeans, or ANY sweater. I love solid button down sweaters. They go with anything. For little girls, jumpers are winter, summer, spring, and fall. In warm months with socks and a polo, in winter with tights and a turtleneck. These things ARE minimalist because they are mix and match so I don't need to own tights that match THIS jumper that only matches THIS shirt... So when the shirt gets stained, it still goes with EVERYTHING the child owns. My two year old loves a jumper that her older sister wore. Not such a big deal until you find out it was BRIANA that originally was the owner! It has been passed down from Ana to Elizabeth, from Elizabeth to Becca, from Becca to Abigail, and then from Abigail to Sarah. I'm sure Daniella will like it next year. :D I don't "hoard" clothing. I keep what is mix and match, what is in good condition, and what we've loved and used. Everything else is donated. I would LOVE my clean and clear closet instead of six tubs marked with sex/ages. However, minimalism isn't about getting rid of what is NECESSARY but rather cutting the UNNECESSARY out of your life. Clothing you will USE very soon in the future (the next season, the next child) isn't extraneous.

 

Minimalist and frugality AND eco-friendly are hand in hand. Google upcycle and you'll open a whole new world for yourself.

Edited January 11, 2011 by BlsdMama

[Peela]

I think the thing with minimalism is that its not about having those clear, magazine like homes with no clutter. It's not about image. It's about a mindset that is the opposite of hoarding and collecting "just in case". It's the opposite of a poverty mentality- even if you do have minimal means.

It is an abundance mentality. Letting go of "holding on" so tight to possessions. I think people take it to mean its about having a clean and tidy house with beautiful, expensive possessions, bare walls etc but I think that is really only a superficial aspect of it- a good one for those who can afford it, but it's not where minimalism is really, in its heart, coming from. It's about letting go of materialism, altogether, really. Realising we just dont need so much stuff to live good lives. It's about freeing up our time and energy from dealing with "stuff" so we can spend more time with people, with doing things that matter, with our deepest values.

Of course we are all going to have to work that out for ourselves and we are all at different places on the continuum between hoarding materialism and 50 personal possessions or a carry on luggage bag only.

The stuff itself, however, is not really the issue- it's our attitude. Its teh letting go, the detachment from deriving personal worth and value through possessions.

 

So for me, I like to keep a list of what I want to replace. If I had a curtain I wanted to replace, I would write it down and then look out for one- a 2nd hand one. I enjoy that though. I found 2nd hand cast iron saucepans to replace my stainless steel ones- but dh woudlnt let go of the stainless steel ones so I kept one in the saucepan cupbaord and the rest are in a top cupboard, out of the way.

I feel its more about creating a flow in my life. I let go of outdated clothes- Flylady calls it "blessing others" with them- just pass them on. I sold some more books on the weekend at teh markets- made $80. I buy new 2nd hand clothes whenever i need something. ANd I let more go. I have a lot of health books...I am agonising over trimming them back more now. What if I go into practice? What if I need any of them? Never mind I havent cracked most of them since the time I first read them years ago.

 

I just think if you know why you are doing it...(for yourself- your perception might be different from mine) - it might be easier to discern how to proceed. I have homeschool books I am not ready to let go of- TWTM, and all 4 SOTWs and Activity guides. Really. I hav efinished homescholing my 2. I want to homeschool my grandkids (never mind what my kids want :) ) I am having issues here, but I am not ready to let them go :)

 

Just do it gently as you are ready, and replace things as it becomes possible.

[mykdsmomy]

 

Minimalist and frugality AND eco-friendly are hand in hand. Google upcycle and you'll open a whole new world for yourself.

 

I need to learn how to sew so I can take advantage of this. Thanks so much. I'm learning a lot!!

 

I think the thing with minimalism is that its not about having those clear, magazine like homes with no clutter. It's not about image. It's about a mindset that is the opposite of hoarding and collecting "just in case". It's the opposite of a poverty mentality- even if you do have minimal means.

It is an abundance mentality. Letting go of "holding on" so tight to possessions. I think people take it to mean its about having a clean and tidy house with beautiful, expensive possessions, bare walls etc but I think that is really only a superficial aspect of it- a good one for those who can afford it, but it's not where minimalism is really, in its heart, coming from. It's about letting go of materialism, altogether, really. Realising we just dont need so much stuff to live good lives. It's about freeing up our time and energy from dealing with "stuff" so we can spend more time with people, with doing things that matter, with our deepest values.

Of course we are all going to have to work that out for ourselves and we are all at different places on the continuum between hoarding materialism and 50 personal possessions or a carry on luggage bag only.

The stuff itself, however, is not really the issue- it's our attitude. Its teh letting go, the detachment from deriving personal worth and value through possessions.

 

So for me, I like to keep a list of what I want to replace. If I had a curtain I wanted to replace, I would write it down and then look out for one- a 2nd hand one. I enjoy that though. I found 2nd hand cast iron saucepans to replace my stainless steel ones- but dh woudlnt let go of the stainless steel ones so I kept one in the saucepan cupbaord and the rest are in a top cupboard, out of the way.

I feel its more about creating a flow in my life. I let go of outdated clothes- Flylady calls it "blessing others" with them- just pass them on. I sold some more books on the weekend at teh markets- made $80. I buy new 2nd hand clothes whenever i need something. ANd I let more go. I have a lot of health books...I am agonising over trimming them back more now. What if I go into practice? What if I need any of them? Never mind I havent cracked most of them since the time I first read them years ago.

 

I just think if you know why you are doing it...(for yourself- your perception might be different from mine) - it might be easier to discern how to proceed. I have homeschool books I am not ready to let go of- TWTM, and all 4 SOTWs and Activity guides. Really. I hav efinished homescholing my 2. I want to homeschool my grandkids (never mind what my kids want :) ) I am having issues here, but I am not ready to let them go :)

 

Just do it gently as you are ready, and replace things as it becomes possible.

 

You need to write a book :D I love how you define minimalism!