plain jane Posted December 30, 2010 Share Posted December 30, 2010 My oldest is notorious for doing this. :glare: She'll ask for stuff on her Christmas list or for her birthday and then when she gets it, she never uses/plays with them. It drives me bonkers! Thing is, she's the least selfish and materialistic of my children so part of my wonders if it's because she doesn't know what to ask for? :confused: An example is a nice jig saw puzzle she asked for for her birthday- she said she really wanted it, was thrilled when she opened it, but now never works on it, even when I suggest it. Another example is the Lego Minotaurus game. She was asking and asking for it and when she got it from Santa (a relative who asked it be given as a Santa gift) she was excited. Now, 3 days later she still does not want to play it. In fact, I had to put the board together with my 4yo. I've asked if the kids want to play it and nobody does. :confused: The list of stuff goes on and on and it's not only frustrating, but expensive. What gives and how do I cure this? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BikeBookBread Posted December 30, 2010 Share Posted December 30, 2010 All the time. I could use some advice as well. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
myfunnybunch Posted December 30, 2010 Share Posted December 30, 2010 What is she doing instead of playing with the games or puzzles? That might give some clues to what kinds of things she'd use. :) What if you start buying CD's to listen to or "experience" kind of gifts, like bowling or skating or theater tickets....things that aren't "stuff"? I can't get my boys to play games or puzzles with me right now either, because they're so busy with their Nerf guns and Legos. But I know that the newness will wear off and they'll be ready to play games and such in a couple weeks. That may not be the case for your dd, just what's happening in my house. Cat Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
plain jane Posted December 30, 2010 Author Share Posted December 30, 2010 What is she doing instead of playing with the games or puzzles? That might give some clues to what kinds of things she'd use. :) What if you start buying CD's to listen to or "experience" kind of gifts, like bowling or skating or theater tickets....things that aren't "stuff"? I can't get my boys to play games or puzzles with me right now either, because they're so busy with their Nerf guns and Legos. But I know that the newness will wear off and they'll be ready to play games and such in a couple weeks. That may not be the case for your dd, just what's happening in my house. Cat It depends- she has a variety of interests from drawing, making paper dolls, reading, etc. There's not one thing she does more than others except maybe reading. :confused: It's just so weird. She got a Lego house 2 years ago and has never once touched it, except for a brief stint of about 1 hour several weeks back. Meanwhile, her sister has built a house and would like to do more so I've asked her to give hers to her sister to do but she keeps insisting she'll get around to it. :001_huh: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AnitaMcC Posted December 30, 2010 Share Posted December 30, 2010 My oldest is notorious for doing this. :glare: She'll ask for stuff on her Christmas list or for her birthday and then when she gets it, she never uses/plays with them. It drives me bonkers! Thing is, she's the least selfish and materialistic of my children so part of my wonders if it's because she doesn't know what to ask for? :confused: An example is a nice jig saw puzzle she asked for for her birthday- she said she really wanted it, was thrilled when she opened it, but now never works on it, even when I suggest it. Another example is the Lego Minotaurus game. She was asking and asking for it and when she got it from Santa (a relative who asked it be given as a Santa gift) she was excited. Now, 3 days later she still does not want to play it. In fact, I had to put the board together with my 4yo. I've asked if the kids want to play it and nobody does. :confused: The list of stuff goes on and on and it's not only frustrating, but expensive. What gives and how do I cure this? Yes this is what my youngest two have a tendency to do. One way I deal with this is that all through the year when my kids ask for something... I put it on a wish list. Then if they ask for it again and again... I put tally marks by the item. So when bdays and Christmas come around I generally know what they really want. I do not buy them any toys, etc except for bday and Christmas. One thing I also noticed that often times my kids have/get too much stuff and they just don't know what they want to play with. So there are times that I just organize things so that things that got sort of buried and not played gets brought out so they can see it. Often times after seeing it a few times they suddenly want to play with it. With my boys... getting a bunch of new toys, etc are just overwhelming and I have noticed that they enjoy playing with just one or two new things for several days. Then these things got "old" and they get bored with it, so they go on to the next new thing that they got for bday/Christmas. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gretchen in NJ Posted December 30, 2010 Share Posted December 30, 2010 My dd11 askes me to buy her clothes and then doesn't wear them.:glare: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hsbaby Posted December 30, 2010 Share Posted December 30, 2010 Yup....my ds does this all the time. We have learned that we should never buy him any sort of building set. Random Lego's are okay, but things like the Trio sets, Knex, stuff like that....never gets put together or played with. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mejane Posted December 30, 2010 Share Posted December 30, 2010 My dd11 askes me to buy her clothes and then doesn't wear them.:glare: This is one of my biggest beefs with my dd. I have started just saying no, however dh still wants to be the good cop and he will take her shopping and buy her things I know she's never going to wear. :glare: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WarriorMama Posted December 30, 2010 Share Posted December 30, 2010 My eldest does this too! It drives me nuts, but I think she just doesn't know what to ask for. She'll just put any cool thing she sees or hears of on her Christmas or birthday list. I dealt with it this year by outlawing the lists. :tongue_smilie: Okay, I didn't really OUTLAW wishlists, but I talked to her about how sometimes it's more fun to be surprised and see what cool things people think you might like. She's quite a fan of surprises and was very enthusiastic about this plan. When we went to see Santa at the mall and he asked what she wanted for Christmas, she cheerfully told him that she'd be happy with anything. The poor man had no idea what to say. :lol: I pay attention to her interests and things she's been wanting to try when picking out gifts and making suggestions to friends and relatives. It's worked out really, really well and she's definitely getting more use out of her gifts than she did when she was just making a list with any flashy thing she saw on TV. ;) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Joyofsixreboot Posted December 30, 2010 Share Posted December 30, 2010 My dh does this. I've asked him why. He says he just likes knowing he has whatever. It's not the doing it's the having.:glare: I have a quirk where I dread getting new things because I'm afraid I won't be able to do it or figure it out. Could either of those be it? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AppleGreen Posted December 30, 2010 Share Posted December 30, 2010 Sigh, yes. As evidenced by the 2! AG dolls she has. She insisted that was all she wanted for Christmas was another one, so they could play together (she got one for her 6th birthday, again b/c that was all she wanted). The younger sister has played more w/ the new doll than she has. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
anneofalamo Posted December 30, 2010 Share Posted December 30, 2010 my eldest daughter twin a (11) does this, because she has no idea what she wants? the others know, have it cut out and labeled for Santa letters....etc but for some reason, Abby has no idea what to ask for and will just in a panic say, some item. what I have started doing is watching her, she loves to make things so I buy craft kits, she loves them we got her a karoake machine, and she has been on it every day since Christmas...she loves it... and right now, her and Dad are singing Sandy from Grease as a duet... she would have never ever had asked for it! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Garga Posted December 30, 2010 Share Posted December 30, 2010 I know my kids pretty well. They ask for things all the time that would not work for them. But they see the commerical, or the box and think they'll like it. But I can take one look at it and know they won't really like it. It sounds like you are figuring out what sorts of things your dd really likes and what she doesn't. For instance, never buy her a Lego toy again! :D Now, to truly solve your problem, here's what I've implemented about 4 months ago: I give the boys an allowance. The each get $5 a week. $0.50 goes to the church. $0.50 goes in the piggy bank, which leaves them $4 to spend. They often will go 2 to 4 weeks without spending the money, so they often have between $8 and $16 in their wallets. When they want a new toy, they'll ask me for it. I'll say, "That looks like a great toy! Would you like me to buy it?" (I'm setting them up here.) They'll say, "Oh yes, yes, yes!" Then I'll say (veeeery gently), "Well, I'm soooo sorry but I just don't have the money today. But wait! You have allowance money! Is this something YOU would want to buy?!" I've been shocked by how many times they'll suddenly no longer want the toy. I'll say, "So, this is something that would be nice for someone else to get you, but it's not really worth spending the money on, right?" And they've come to be able to recognize what things are really worth having and are valuable to them, and what things aren't. And if I am very gentle in the above exchange, they don't even get upset that I'm not buying it for them. They simply realize it's not worth having. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Impish Posted December 30, 2010 Share Posted December 30, 2010 Tazzie, last year, was convinced he'd DIE if he didn't get Rocky the Robot Truck. Santa obliged, and he's played w/it a handful of times. :glare: So, no more 'robot' anything. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
myfunnybunch Posted December 30, 2010 Share Posted December 30, 2010 Tazzie, last year, was convinced he'd DIE if he didn't get Rocky the Robot Truck. Oh, it could be worse. He could play with Rocky the Robot truck all. the. time. I had one who HAD to have that stupid toy. Grandma got it for him last year. I hate Rocky the Robot Truck. :glare: Cat Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jenn- Posted December 30, 2010 Share Posted December 30, 2010 Oh, it could be worse. He could play with Rocky the Robot truck all. the. time. I had one who HAD to have that stupid toy. Grandma got it for him last year. I hate Rocky the Robot Truck. :glare: Cat Rocky spends a lot of time in "time out" at my house. He is one of the most annoying toys in the world. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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