nknapp5 Posted June 21, 2010 Share Posted June 21, 2010 I just wanted a little encouragement! I have 4 DC (ages 6,4,2,10 mos). Over the years we have gotten many toys and gotten rid of very few. I am now in the process of throwing, giving away, selling, etc and my kids are calling me a bad mom and throwing fits. They are making me feel so guilty! Kids don't need a lot of toys, right!? Now I'm so upset with them I'm about to give up or just get rid of everything (probably not that). Any advice. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jan in SC Posted June 21, 2010 Share Posted June 21, 2010 Maybe you should pack some of the toys away for a set period of time and then if someone asks for a specific toy, you will still have it. I did this, and only two toys were ever requested. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
stripe Posted June 21, 2010 Share Posted June 21, 2010 I agree. Out of sight, out of mind. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
4kiddies Posted June 21, 2010 Share Posted June 21, 2010 I toss things all the time. The key is to remove them when they are not around, put them away for a set length of time--say a week-- and if they don't ask for them then get rid of them but don't let them see it in the garbage can! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KellyinAr Posted June 21, 2010 Share Posted June 21, 2010 :iagree: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lmrich Posted June 21, 2010 Share Posted June 21, 2010 I purge when the kids are not at home. Just like the other posters have said - put in a bag that can't be seen and if they ask for it - give it to them. When I purge, I always rearrange their rooms just a bit, just so they won't be on to the missing items. However, they never seem to notice. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sophia Posted June 21, 2010 Share Posted June 21, 2010 I understand feeling guilty. My little boys have so many toys I can't even walk in their room. Some of those toys are newer, but many of them are toys my oldest ds played with and saved. Now I'm the one who's so attached to them and can't get rid of them! Good grief. I'm gonna have to get really stern with myself though, because having an excess of toys is not healthy for them. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cougarmom4 Posted June 21, 2010 Share Posted June 21, 2010 I also have a hard time getting rid of things--and feel like we have tons of toys! And yet...we have four kids--boy, girl, boy, girl--all at different stages of 'toys'--so we DO have a lot of variety which makes for a lot of toys. Does that make sense? If we had only girls who loved baby dolls & playing house, we would certainly be able to limit things more...but with four of them with different interests/likes, it's going to mean a lot more in quantity. I'm also hesitant to get rid of things as one outgrows them, because in the long run I don't want to purchase similar toys again when a younger one gets to that stage. So...our solution is to do a toy rotation. When one outgrows something, we box it up and keep it in a storage room--so the playroom isn't so packed with things, but we don't have to spend money to buy something again. I've even presented some of these previously used toys as birthday/Christmas gifts (sometimes needing to remind the older that s/he's outgrown it and now it is a surprise for the next one). We do have certain toys that I keep out of reach and then bring out occasionally to find the kids are excited to see them again--such as a marbleworks set, train set, etc. It sure helps in keeping the playroom/bedrooms picked up not to have too many things available at once. However, if you really do need to get rid of stuff, I agree with pp that say to do so while the kids aren't there! Or perhaps you could allow them to fill certain baskets with their favorites and encourage them to donate or sell the others (mine are usually quite eager to sell to get money for something else!). Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lisamarie Posted June 21, 2010 Share Posted June 21, 2010 I would give the kids a grocery sack and tell them to fill it with toys THEY want to get rid of. Don't give them an option. Tell them, you fill it or I will. Probably twice a year I will dump everything out in our playroom and the kids put back what they want, throw away the trash/broken toys, and put the toys they want to get rid of into a bag. Friday we went through my DS's room and he got rid of 2 hampers full of toys. Once they get used to it, they become better at purging. In the long run, it'll pay off with them having an easier time of getting rid of things. In my house, I'M the one who usually wavers back and forth before agreeing to let things go. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nknapp5 Posted June 21, 2010 Author Share Posted June 21, 2010 I guess I'm the one with the problem too, that is why we have so many toys, I have the problem getting rid of toys which flows down to my kids. Like cougarmom I go to throw something away my older son doesn't use and think my younger son might play with it someday. I have tried the putting away the toys for the next kid and end up forgetting I have them put away and buy or give gift suggestions for that same toy that is in a box, in the basement. Does anyone limit the # of toys their kid can have? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Radish4ever Posted June 21, 2010 Share Posted June 21, 2010 We had to pack and get rid of a ton of toys recently... we put our house on the market, so we can't have a ton of clutter! The compromise we made (and this was hard bc DD had a birthday literally DAYS before we put our house on the market!) was that they are each allowed 2 small lidded tubs of toys and those toys stay on the top shelf in their closet. They also each get to keep their "babies" that they sleep with (and also play with them a ton so those count as toys but not in the tub rule) and those have to stay in a toy box we have during the day. We also got rid of a ton of books bc we truthfully use the library SO much that it just isn't practical to have 6 bookcases full. I do have a few boxes packed away with toys that my youngest will be able to play with in several months that my middle child has outgrown... Another thing I did was have a garage sale one morning while my mom had the kids. I was able to sell quite a bit of things without them knowing. As "mean" as it is, if they've asked about something, I have told them it was packed away for our new house. We only have 2 boxes of toys actually packed so I probably sold whatever they're asking about but in a few months they won't remember. I do have some guilt, especially since a lot of the items were purchased as gifts by my parents for them... but we have to be practical and I cannot try and stay on top of constant clutter AND have my house show-ready, ykwim? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Daisy Posted June 21, 2010 Share Posted June 21, 2010 We've always donated toys to the local homeless shelter, foster agency, etc. (Always call first). But I think it has helped my children learn that getting rid of something isn't horrible. They are helping someone else who has far less than they do. They usually get excited. My son has a little bit harder time with it but once he gets started he is fine. I do let my children choose what they wish to get rid of. If they pitch a fit, I'd just keep at it with all gentleness. I'm going to say something like, "Well, do you think you can find just two things to give away?" or "What do you think a little boy who has no toys at all would like to play with from your room? We've also made sure to take the children with us when we drop off the toys. They get a glimpse into how other people live. The fact is that I want my children to learn to give away their extra stuff. I don't want them having this over-attachment to things later in life. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
myfunnybunch Posted June 21, 2010 Share Posted June 21, 2010 I took a little different approach to purging. I do it with the kids. I ask them to choose any toys that they think they are done with and put them in the bin. I purge with them in the room, and invite them to help. If they see a must-have toy go in the box, I let them take it out, but I remind them that we can't keep everything. Before I take the bin out to the garage, I ask them if there is one special toy in the box that they want to keep. We put all of the best-condition toys in a special bag to give to children who don't have a lot of toys and the rest go to Goodwill. At first they wanted to keep everything (and I asid Yes for the most part), but after about 2 years, they mostly ignore the process unless they see an absolute favorite going in the bin. Sometimes they help, sometimes they don't. I didn't go into the purging process with any particular lesson in mind, I just wanted to get rid of stuff. But for my children it's been a blessing. They already (sort of) know how to choose what to donate, what to throw away and what to keep. Ymmv, of course, because all kids are different. :) Cat Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Heather in OK Posted June 21, 2010 Share Posted June 21, 2010 We've always donated toys to the local homeless shelter, foster agency, etc. (Always call first). But I think it has helped my children learn that getting rid of something isn't horrible. They are helping someone else who has far less than they do. They usually get excited. :iagree: Make it a service project for your children. It's a great lesson for them of giving to those in need. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Paige Posted June 21, 2010 Share Posted June 21, 2010 We have so many toys that it is sick. I do purge regularly but it seems like the toys are breeding or something because we always have too many toys! Part of our problem is the grandparents keep bringing stuff over and then I feel bad for purging their toys. I know they will ask about it and even though I tell them we don't need toys, and they see that we don't need toys, we still keep getting toys!! I would much prefer they spend their money on something else entirely or at least buy 1-2 nice toys over 15 junky toys but they say it spoils their fun. My kids do play with most of their toys too so it is hard to find things that I can say they won't miss. They even play with all of their stuffed animals that we have way too many of. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
3lilreds in NC Posted June 21, 2010 Share Posted June 21, 2010 I am terrible about toys. We have scads of them, primarily because of ME. I'm ready to get rid of them now, though, and have also met with resistance - some from dh! I need to make a point of getting out a bin and putting some of the baby's toys away while he's asleep. I am pretty sure he wouldn't notice. He has several different kinds of cars; surely he will be happy with one kind that is easy to find. We have more stuff than he can reasonably play with. The girls and I will have to have another talk about their toys. They have stuff they like to play with but right now are mostly into crafty things. I think we could get rid of some and still have plenty left over. I think once our school furniture gets here, and we can set up the bonus room in our new house, we will be able to see how much room we really have and decide how much needs to be purged. Good luck with this purging thing! I know it's hard. I have gotten much less sentimental about toys, though. My parents are awesome and don't get offended if things they've given don't make the final cut. The inlaws are another story, but they will get over it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RanchMom Posted June 21, 2010 Share Posted June 21, 2010 I guess I'm the one with the problem too, that is why we have so many toys, I have the problem getting rid of toys which flows down to my kids. Like cougarmom I go to throw something away my older son doesn't use and think my younger son might play with it someday. I have tried the putting away the toys for the next kid and end up forgetting I have them put away and buy or give gift suggestions for that same toy that is in a box, in the basement. Does anyone limit the # of toys their kid can have? I've tried that. We live/homeschool in 625 sq. ft. (for those unfamiliar with square footage, that's probably about the size of your living room. . .:lol:) But I've never gotten it to work. We just do the "give to charity" and the box it for later and the pitch-when-they-aren't-looking thing. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mynyel Posted June 21, 2010 Share Posted June 21, 2010 I admit it...I am sneaky. I wait till they are otherwise preoccupied and then sneak stuff in the garbage. My kids (well the youngers) wouldn't get rid of anything so I just sneak it away! I throw away things that are in corners, under beds, bottom of the toy box etc.. They never notice! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Amy in KS Posted June 21, 2010 Share Posted June 21, 2010 You could have a garage sale with toys. Let the kids keep all or a portion of the profits. That encouraged my children tremendously and I didn't have to be mean mom! Of course, mom and dad had veto power if their was something that needed to be passed down (like a bike). Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nknapp5 Posted June 21, 2010 Author Share Posted June 21, 2010 continued thanks for all the wonderful ideas. Ranchmom: 625 sq ft.!!! are you serious, correct me if I"m wrong, you live in a house w/ 4 kids and it's 625 sq ft. How do you do it? Don't let my husband see this b/c I complain about our house being to small. Love the idea about making it a service project! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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